How do you know if a chap’s trying to hit on you or just being nice? Here’s a list of six basic signs to remember when meeting a guy at a social event. It’s not rocket science, just things based on my personal experience.

1. He’s more attentive to you than he is everyone else.

If you are at a party or some function where there’s a group of people and you notice he’s spending far more time with you than the bros he came with, he probably has a thing for you. If you are standing right next to your three best girlfriends and he’s only talking to you then he probably has a thing for you. What that thing is, I’m not sure.

2. He wants to know more about you. He listens.

He asks you questions. Then he responds with specific information about your answers.

“Oh, really? Why did go for a Sociology major?”

“What was your favorite thing about studying abroad in France?”

“Yeah, your boss does sound like a jerk.”

If he simply responds with a “That’s nice” or nods when you speak, then he’s not the one. It as if he responded “ok” to your 300-word multi-text message about your feelings.

3. He goes the extra mile to help you.

He opens the door for you. He offers to carry your bags up the stairs. Who says chivalry is dead? It might be in critical condition, but it’s still kicking. Actually many knights in the medieval days were only chivalrous to a woman in order guarantee the dowry, which might have included an estate and large sums of money, from their noble, future father-in-law. Not all of them, though. Well, some things never change. Nowadays, if a guy’s being super helpful, and abnormally so, then he probably wants your dowry, or at least your phone number.

4. He maintains eye contact.

Random aside: I’m curious as to how often women actually call men out for staring at their breasts and say “Hey! My eyes are up here.” Well, unlike those creeps, this guy looks you in the eyes. He’s also smiling at you. Constantly. And not that psychopathic Joker smile. You know the smile I’m talking about. He looks like he genuinely enjoys your conversation.

5. He tries real hard to make you laugh.

Key word “tries.” He doesn’t yet know your type of humor but he tries to make you laugh at any rate. A Family Guy reference. A joke about some wasted fool at the party. A quote from a trending YouTube video. Whether you actually end up laughing is something else entirely. But, hey, it’s the thought that counts, right?

6. He finds any excuse to touch you.

I recently went on a date with a chap who couldn’t keep his hands off me. Not in a sexual way, but, he would find any reason to touch me. He made me feel like an old lady every time we crossed the street.

I admit, I have a problem texting while walking in New York. (Admission is the first step). If I don’t stop now, it’s only a matter of time before I get hit. You can rest assured that won’t happen as long as this fellow’s beside me.

When the light would turn green he would put his arm behind my back and gently tug me with him. When it turned red he would hold his hand to my stomach and push me back. I didn’t mind. It was simply his way of showing interest. And saving my life.

Naturally, none of these are surefire ways to know if the guy likes you. However, it’s a safe bet that, if he does all 6 things, he digs you. (Now, whether he continues this behavior after you start dating is another story, entirely.)

He really could just be a nice gent, though. Maybe you just remind him of his sister…or his girlfriend, who was too busy saving the world from puking infants to make it to the party.