I've read through a number of posts from men and heard their rants about "men are scarce because women are not looking for "good" men.  I am sure i can speak for all women - we are looking for "good" men  The problem is - the good men turned out to be bad men,  . . . .well some.  So, what makes a good man? Just curious,

Here is my definition of a good man

Never cheats on his girlfriend (one man woman)

He is a man of honor, one who keeps (never break) his words

He should take the responsible as head of the house (takes care of business - The intellect)

One who is willing to date a woman with children (1, 2, 3, 4, 5 and more) Yes, accept her with all her children".  I have heard guys before saying "man she is fine but woa. . . . , 4 KIDS (shouting)

I can go on and on but these are my main defs

P.S. Oh, i've found a good guy, . .dayum good. . . , well i hope so.  

Peace

What you think, is what you get. If you think there is man shortage so it will be for you, and if you think the other way round so it will be. There are bad guys, worse guys and worst guys and there are good guys, better guys and best guys. Focus on yourself, become something, use your head, be quite reserved and stop killing yourself over guys. look good and feel good and be optimistics, good guys will naturally fall in.

There's no man shortgage.
Everywhere i look its raining men!!! Good men at that.
Im married (snagged me a good one too!) so my roving eyes have to be perpetually averted. Kills me when chics are running around wasting precious time on the men that have no drive, no potentials, no nothing. The empty barrels have always made the loudest noise. Avoid those.

Well @ the poster, this would mean your observation from your own angle.

You go to certain places and you see so many beautifull ladies (when i mean beautifull, i mean beautifull!) flocking around and you're like WOW! are the men not in trouble of being run over?

In line with comments i have seen so far on the topic, men shortage has been broken down into REAL MEN shortage. The woman's perception of a real man varies according to person. I'll take that to mean a woman looks out to find the perfect man wherein there is no such thing as a perfect man.lol. We mostly end up living with the quality that attracts us to the opposite sex and then manage imperfections we can accomodate.

I for one believe the women folk contribute largely to men playing them. lol

forget about the population ratio of women to men: there is no man shortage. all that matters is the standard of the lady in question in terms of character, dressing, level of interaction with people around her etc.

As  you will agree with me that at least there are not less than 10 unmarried men around your neighbourhood.

If you have what it takes to be a wife or befiting girlfriend tell me how 7 out of these 10 men will not come after you. I seems that there are shortage of men because some men like me are not interested in a liability, unrealistic, unpopular, arogant girls.

AS a piece of advice to girls try as much as possible to be good and see how many guy in your neighbourhood or school and/or work place will be falling over you for serious relationship.

on ur side men will be more populated than women: AT THAT TIME YOU WILL ASK "IS THERE A WOMAN SHORTAGE"?

for more lecture on this mail me at      naijahome@yahoo.com

To me, there is shortage of potential husband. A lot of men out there are not ready to get married for reason known to them only.

I saw an advert while reading Nigeria Tribune online newspaper inviting me to joing a dating site, purely African. On visiting the site, I realise there is tens of thousand Nigerian ladies seeking to meet their spouses. Well, I know there is a problem somewhere. Its is where there is shortage of an 'item' that demand tends to cause scarcity.
This is my own submission

no shortage of any sexes oh, they all speculations

esilove:

forget about the population ratio of women to men: there is no man shortage. all that matters is the standard of the lady in question in terms of character, dressing, level of interaction with people around her etc.

As you will agree with me that at least there are not less than 10 unmarried men around your neighbourhood.

If you have what it takes to be a wife or befiting girlfriend tell me how 7 out of these 10 men will not come after you. I seems that there are shortage of men because some men like me are not interested in a liability, unrealistic, unpopular, arogant girls.

AS a piece of advice to girls try as much as possible to be good and see how many guy in your neighbourhood or school and/or work place will be falling over you for serious relationship.

on ur side men will be more populated than women: AT THAT TIME YOU WILL ASK "IS THERE A WOMAN SHORTAGE"?

for more lecture on this mail me at naijahome@yahoo.com

ykush:

Well @ the poster, this would mean your observation from your own angle.

You go to certain places and you see so many beautifull ladies (when i mean beautifull, i mean beautifull!) flocking around and you're like WOW! are the men not in trouble of being run over?

In line with comments i have seen so far on the topic, men shortage has been broken down into REAL MEN shortage. The woman's perception of a real man varies according to person. I'll take that to mean a woman looks out to find the perfect man wherein there is no such thing as a perfect man.lol. We mostly end up living with the quality that attracts us to the opposite sex and then manage imperfections we can accomodate.

I for one believe the women folk contribute largely to men playing them. lol

I swear to God, Nigerians are comedians

@Canyon is definitely right, if u have all the qualities, wheter you are a man or a woman, ur choice list will be endless. Who no like better thing. Also, there is a saying that you cannot attract what you dont respect. Good people attract good people, bad people attract bad people.

@poster

may b dis post strengthens the case for POLYGAMY!

Man shortage ? How ridiculous . I thought this was 2008(almost 9), and men and women are supposed to be free to shag up with whom or whatever they liked.
It kills me when i hear girls who're doing fine in life thinking they need a man to validate their existence. Your mothers obviously didn't do a good job on your self esteem.
Personally, i don't know if I'll ever marry, but i know what i want from life whether i end up being rich or poor. Girls should be brought up to pursue self fulfillment not growing up with a mind set of becoming one hobos glorified maid.

my dad is looking 4 second wife any body who think there are men shortage should just call me

If you ask me,i'd say that there appears to be no men shortage anywhere,just that we all seem to be looking for the men at the wrong places.

Come to think of it,what do you call the truck-pushers under the bridge?The gardeners,cleaners,janitor,etc.

The crux of the matter is that the womenfolk seems to have if you ask me exagerated perspective of what they really want in there men.

They all want to date a hunk,a senator,doctor,rich lawyer,engineer,bankers,etc,without recourse to 'these' men.

@stillwater
4rm what i've read so far on this thread you must definitely be a pretender. U always like depicting your self as that perfect and principled woman. Your kind of person would beg to sleep with a man, but when you come out in the open u would completely condemn thesame man. This is even evident in your statement that 'u can never thread ur nether region 4 a man's nonsense' Even if u cant thread ur nether region must u refer to a man's FG as nonsense. If care is not taken you begged 4 it last nite. Dont be so annoyed if i am sounding so awkward is just that i so much dislike fake people be it man or woman.I just want to ask u a single question 'assuming u are married and u find out that your husband is cheating on you, what would you do'?. Please Be real!! in answering this question, that is if u wld care to answer it.

Someone said this to me today and it makes plenty of sense "men are always getting themselves killed off in war so there are always more females than males

Peace

There is something called fecundity which is basically fertility but it is measured by counting the amount of female offspring by a female offspring. So although it seems bad now but it seems women are more important to continue this cycle so yes there is a shortage of men.

Cayon:
One who is willing to date a woman with children (1, 2, 3, 4, 5 and more) Yes, accept her with all her children". I have heard guys before saying "man she is fine but woa. . . . , 4 KIDS (shouting)

Why the hell will I want to carry someone else's baggage? So am not willing to date a woman with kids, I am not a good man?

Are you joking?

Sagamite:

Why the hell will I want to carry someone else's baggage? So am not willing to date a woman with kids, I am not a good man?
Are you joking?

Lolz . . . . . . . .its doesnt make any man a bad guy.

Sagamite:

Why the hell will I want to carry someone else's baggage? So am not willing to date a woman with kids, I[b] am not a good man?[/b]
Are you joking?

Firstly, children are not baggage. they are a gift from God , why people consider this baggage is beyond me. No, that doesn't make you a bad guy but it shows that you have a limit on love. True love has no limits. Saying this if you love someone you should be willing to accept her with her baggage children. But then again, anyone who isn't willing to accept your children isn't right for you anyway. That's just my 2¢

Peace

Cayon:

Firstly, children are not baggage. they are a gift from God , why people consider this baggage is beyond me. No, that doesn't make you a bad guy but it shows that you have a limit on love. True love has no limits. Saying this if you love someone you should be willing to accept her with her baggage children.  But then again, anyone who isn't willing to accept your children isn't right for you anyway.  That's just my 2¢

Peace

Sweetheart,

To be frank, they are your gift and I bet they are lovely, to me they will be a baggage as I will have to take responsibility (since I am a responsible man) to an extent for their upbringing at my young age. It might be OK if I was in my 40s or something.

I will rather wait on the queue to get my own "unopened" gift from God.

I could take a woman with a child if I was in my 40s and divorced but now, no way. And I am a good men despite that.

All love has limit otherwise you wouldn't be setting the criteria you were setting above for finding love.

I guess b/c I am talking from my experience. The second guy I dated had two kids and it didn't bother me. Yes, my g/f said the same thing about baggage. hey call me crazy, but when I was dating him I bought kids clothes.

I guess to each his own

Peace

Cayon:

Firstly, children are not baggage. they are a gift from God , why people consider this baggage is beyond me. No, that doesn't make you a bad guy but it shows that you have a limit on love. True love has no limits. Saying this if you love someone you should be willing to accept her with her baggage children. But then again, anyone who isn't willing to accept your children isn't right for you anyway. That's just my 2¢

Peace

That's false. It simply shows the man is a pragmatist who is prepared to look well before he leaps. There are several things to consider when marrying a woman with kids that wont necessarily be a problem with a single female.

1. why is she singe? Divorced or widow?
2. if divorced . . . who was at fault?
3. what is the custody situation with the kids?
4. how much of her ex-husband is going to be a factor in her new marriage?
5. Family - how will they react?
6. Finances - are you ready to cope with 4 kids who arent yours financially?
7. Your wife from day 1 will be sharing you with other kids that you dont have an emotional connection with just yet.
8. are the kids going to be living with us? Who disciplines them?

Reality has to be faced when it comes to issues like this. Its not about limits on love. All these alice in wonderland tales of "love conquering all" does not exist in the real world.

davidylan:

That's false. It simply shows the man is a pragmatist who is prepared to look well before he leaps. There are several things to consider when marrying a woman with kids that wont necessarily be a problem with a single female.

1. why is she singe? Divorced or widow?
2. if divorced . . . who was at fault?
3. what is the custody situation with the kids?
4. how much of her ex-husband is going to be a factor in her new marriage?
5. Family - how will they react?
6. Finances - are you ready to cope with 4 kids who arent yours financially?
7. Your wife from day 1 will be sharing you with other kids that you don't have an emotional connection with just yet.
8. are the kids going to be living with us? Who disciplines them?

Reality has to be faced when it comes to issues like this. Its not about limits on love. All these alice in wonderland tales of "love conquering all" does not exist in the real world.

LOL that's deep  You might as well hire a detective to investigate her.  Your list is real funny.  My Lord   
Peace

davidylan:

That's false. It simply shows the man is a pragmatist who is prepared to look well before he leaps. There are several things to consider when marrying a woman with kids that wont necessarily be a problem with a single female.

1. why is she singe? Divorced or widow?
2. if divorced . . . who was at fault?
3. what is the custody situation with the kids?
4. how much of her ex-husband is going to be a factor in her new marriage?
5. Family - how will they react?
6. Finances - are you ready to cope with 4 kids who arent yours financially?
7. Your wife from day 1 will be sharing you with other kids that you don't have an emotional connection with just yet.
8. are the kids going to be living with us? Who disciplines them?

Reality has to be faced when it comes to issues like this. Its not about limits on love. All these alice in wonderland tales of "love conquering all" does not exist in the real world.

david you definately changed your diet. you are so old these days it is unbelievable. is this just from hanging out with funmi, topup, karma and co? you a better man my brother. God bless you. you remember we were here in another thread

Plenty recipe for the ideal man/woman. All these are utopian. Make the best out of what you have. Here lies the cream of humanity.

Cayon,

just want to respond to ur earlier comment about guys not willing to date women with children,well that was i thought until i met a pretty lady with 3 kids years back,i fell for her and we dated for some time but i realised that most of her actions,her life,her attitute to things is centered around the father of her kids she is just not ready to move on unfortunately for us.but my point is she blames me for the breakup(wow) and believes in most of the things you girls are saying on these thread,the fact of the matter is each failed relationship should be examined for what they are? THERE ARE TERRIBLE GUYS BUT LADIES SHOULD SOMETIMES CHECK THEMSELVES AS WELL,its always very,very,very,very,easy to point the fingers at the guys

Oga o

Sagamite:

Why the hell will I want to carry someone else's baggage? So am not willing to date a woman with kids, I am not a good man?

well said,

Sagamite:

Sweetheart,

To be frank, they are your gift and I bet they are lovely, to me they will be a baggage as I will have to take responsibility (since I am a responsible man) to an extent for their upbringing at my young age. It might be OK if I was in my 40s or something.

I will rather wait on the queue to get my own "unopened" gift from God.

I could take a woman with a child if I was in my 40s and divorced but now, no way. And I am a good men despite that.

All love has limit otherwise you wouldn't be setting the criteria you were setting above for finding love.

you crack me up, words of wisdom!!!

bodieb2005:

Cayon,

just want to respond to ur earlier comment about guys not willing to date women with children,well that was i thought until i met a pretty lady with 3 kids years back,i fell for her and we dated for some time but i realised that most of her actions,her life,her attitute to things is centered around the father of her kids she is just not ready to move on unfortunately for us.but my point is she blames me for the breakup(wow) and believes in most of the things you girls are saying on these thread,the fact of the matter is each failed relationship should be examined for what they are? THERE ARE TERRIBLE GUYS BUT LADIES SHOULD SOMETIMES CHECK THEMSELVES AS WELL,its always very,very,very,very,easy to point the fingers at the guys

Oga o

Nobody wants to be in love triangle playing second fiddle- may be except females in Islam.

edoyad:

Nobody wants to be in love triangle playing second fiddle- may be except females in Islam.

triangle indeed

My 40 cents {to hell with 2 cents}

I think like the best men, like the ones that understand how a woman feels. Knows when she is upset and how to go about it. Understands the mindset of a woman. And how even though we may act and seem like we are confident, internally we are not. We are insecure. We do care what people of us. We do feed off the compliments men give us. Those are the men that know the right words to say and know when to just listen. These are the men that have many female friends because they can relate and but things into a different perspective. Like when you are just in your lowest of the low. I mean you look up and all you see is dirt and worms and shit. And unfortunately we women can't have these men. Because as we all know, the best men are gay.

My 40 cents.

onyinye2:

My 40 cents {to hell with 2 cents}

I think like the best men, like the ones that understand how a woman feels. Knows when she is upset and how to go about it. Understands the mindset of a woman. And how even though we may act and seem like we are confident, internally we are not. We are insecure. We do care what people of us. We do feed off the compliments men give us. Those are the men that know the right words to say and know when to just listen. These are the men that have many female friends because they can relate and but things into a different perspective. Like when you are just in your lowest of the low. I mean you look up and all you see is dirt and worms and shit. And unfortunately we women can't have these men. Because as we all know, the best men are gay.

My 40 cents.