aameyah:
I really appreciate your answers.

Her dad and mum are aware of some of his minor inadequacies. And her dad told her to count her losses and move on.
But what they are not aware of is all the major drama and all the insults.Because her dad washed his hands off the issue when she refused to listen. He started having his reservations right from when they started preparing for the wedding.

I think I have to talk to her to tell them. Maybe a family meeting is the way to go.

My friend is a good girl. Very hard working and all. She's also an excellent cook to booth and unlike most women who got married as virgins is very open with her husband sexually. If only he would approach her with love. I wouldn't call her frigid. How do you enjoy seks with a guy who doesn't touch your body during the act not even once. He doesn't kiss her. He doesn't caress her.
How do you enjoy watching intimacy with a stranger? When he plays it, they both sit apart watching silently. When finished, she undresses and bam, finish!

He stands up and leaves her. C'est finite.

When she cooks he eats and calls a girlfriend to tell her what he is eating. I don't know again ooh. Her parents I think are the best to be of assistance.

,

Ishilove:

Hian!! Which kind of nzuzu is this?

EfemenaXY:


What do you mean "speak some sense into his head"? Does the man's request for a divorce sound unreasonable to you? Is he a confused child? Are you not aware that sometimes, it's best to stop flogging a dead horse? Why should she try to fix what doesn't want to be fixed?

jearile:

What God has joined together, let no man (husband/wife inclusive) put asunder.

It can be fixed!

dinachi:
Enough of all these emotional answers from feminists here! I can almost picture the situation clearly in my mind...here goes.
From my observation, your friend is a bitter woman. She is very bitter against everything for her tumour and she blames herself. She sees sex as work not as fun that is why the man can hardly get it up and struggles with it. She has never really loved the man. I can almost swear that her puccy stinks and for some men that is a total turn off. Without it being said I know she is an introvert. Now I know her body hygiene is suspect because most women becomes unkempt if they believe they are not being appreciated enough. SOLUTION.
1, Let her understand that ONLY she is responsible for her own happiness not her Husband! It is her choice to either be happy or not.
2, She should love herself. Her friend should help her to rediscover herself, tell her your old jokes that the really enjoys and refuse to discuss her husband with her anymore.
3, She must make sure she bathes regularly and get a very nice deodorant and perfume and use it very well on herself.
4, Her puccy hygiene is critical. She must wash it thoroughly and always ensure it is very neat before sex with her husband. Stinking puccy totally turns a lot of guys off.
5, She should go out of her way to buy porn movies and join the husband to watch it .
6, She should stop crying around all the time.
and put a smile on her face.
7, She is too rigid in bed..She should spice it up ...touch the man's body...lick and suck his nipples..run your fingers behind his neck...lick and gently suck his ear.. Go on top... Make the sex lively..free your mind..sex if properly done is very pleasurable.
BUT if she cannot bring herself to do these, then I recommend a trial separation first. She should go away for a while...

dinachi:
Enough of all these emotional answers from feminists here! I can almost picture the situation clearly in my mind...here goes.
From my observation, your friend is a bitter woman. She is very bitter against everything for her tumour and she blames herself. She sees sex as work not as fun that is why the man can hardly get it up and struggles with it. She has never really loved the man. I can almost swear that her puccy stinks and for some men that is a total turn off. Without it being said I know she is an introvert. Now I know her body hygiene is suspect because most women becomes unkempt if they believe they are not being appreciated enough. SOLUTION.
1, Let her understand that ONLY she is responsible for her own happiness not her Husband! It is her choice to either be happy or not.
2, She should love herself. Her friend should help her to rediscover herself, tell her your old jokes that the really enjoys and refuse to discuss her husband with her anymore.
3, She must make sure she bathes regularly and get a very nice deodorant and perfume and use it very well on herself.
4, Her puccy hygiene is critical. She must wash it thoroughly and always ensure it is very neat before sex with her husband. Stinking puccy totally turns a lot of guys off.
5, She should go out of her way to buy porn movies and join the husband to watch it .
6, She should stop crying around all the time.
and put a smile on her face.
7, She is too rigid in bed..She should spice it up ...touch the man's body...lick and suck his nipples..run your fingers behind his neck...lick and gently suck his ear.. Go on top... Make the sex lively..free your mind..sex if properly done is very pleasurable.
BUT if she cannot bring herself to do these, then I recommend a trial separation first. She should go away for a while...

An0nimus:


I doubt you read the story well. Nobody is claiming Feminist here either. Na wa

bukatyne:



It is not compulsory to comment on a thread

If you want to, slowly read the OP, think of how you will act/react or the best solution to the issue and comment

Compliments of the season

Sophyrocks:


And they say its only women who cant handle their emotions. He is pouring all his frustrations to comment. Hehehehe.

bukatyne:


The thunder that will fire the 'feminist' who did him strong thing is still doing press up

Sophyrocks:

Hehehehe.
He is just too emotional. Can't deal. What a whiner!!

aisha2:


How wont he be emotional when you guys are here saying things like women should have rights, feelings and self value.
Small time now you guys will give him a heart attack by claiming women too should have organs-m.
You guys should stop jare, all these feminist things is going too far jare

EfemenaXY:


I abhor guys who misyarn from both sides of the mouth!

Would you be saying this if the tables were turned? Where your wife openly tells you she's banging other guys to get pregnant, and has the effontry to call them up in your presence saying "I love you" whilst belittling you to them? Or tells you to watch p0rn with her because you as a man can't turn her on?

Would you still remember the analogy of what God has joined together let no man put asunder, knowing she's having unprotected sex with goodness knows who?

Guy, if you know you can't take an iota of this crap, then why should she? Because she's a woman? Because she's a lesser being?

Mtcheew.

byvan:
We women should learn to be more rational and logical with our thinking. Why struggle to make a baby with a man that isn't ready to be a husband, let alone a father? What exactly does she intend to achieve with a pregnancy from this man? This man is even decent enough to show his disgust and has requested for a divorce, he is a better man than those that will string you along only to betray you at last. The society she is worried about will move on with their lives even if she dies today, so why on earth is she worried about peeps that really don't give a shi*t? Tell your friend to have some self esteem, let her love herself, if she develops HBP, this man will keep banging, she dies, banging continues, so what does she want out of this life? To answer Mrs or to live, which ever she choses is ok by me but let her stop the complaints.

jearile:

Though, not married yet but there's a deep understanding I've as regards to the issue of marriage and that's why I'm not surprised if my view sounds "illogical" to you. I've seen marriages that went through worse case than this and are now fixed; and marriages that also faced lesser predicament that's dead and buried. The difference now is in their approach and mentality.
Love will surely prevail and triumph - the devil is not that powerful to turn a prince to a beast overnight.

Sophyrocks:


Thank you jare. Better person with a good head on his shoulders. I dnt understand how a man would be commenting emotionally without properly reading the Op. He is just coming up with imaginary problems the lady has perhaps they are problems he is facing himself. SMH.

bukatyne:


The thunder that will fire the 'feminist' who did him strong thing is still doing press up

EfemenaXY:


That doesn't answer the question I asked you.

Jearile, would you remain in a "marriage" where your wife constantly emotionally abuses you, whilst actively playing the field?

Or would you suddenly remember scriptural verses that give you grounds for divorce where adultery is involved?

jearile:

Action speaks louder than words... So the fact that I give an emphatic YES to your question right now does not really stop me from acting otherwise if peradventure I'm faced with that kind of challenge.
You know when I said I've a deep understanding about this sanctimonious institute called marriage I didn't say to mince words; within this short period of my life I've seen and heard things that just keep echoing the need for one to be prepared with the help of God before saying "yes I do."
Giving up on your marriage is not the same thing as staying away from your wife/husband for awhile. It is not a matter of proximity but attitude.
Do all you can to win your wife/husband back; we're not talking about a boyfriend/girlfriend, for crying outloud it's your bone of your bone and flesh of your flesh.
I'll take my time with the help of God to choose my wife and nothing come what may will make me to give up on her, and I mean it provided she was forced into my life.
All God needs is a sincere heart!
#youmustcarryurCross

jearile:

Action speaks louder than words... So the fact that I give an emphatic YES to your question right now does not really stop me from acting otherwise if peradventure I'm faced with that kind of challenge.


I'll take my time with the help of God to choose my wife and nothing come what may will make me to give up on her, and I mean it provided she was forced into my life.

EfemenaXY:


Or maybe, quite possibly, he is the philandering man in question.

EfemenaXY:



What do you mean by act otherwise? Why put conditions to your "emphatic" YES? I didn't see any of those conditions of yours whilst dishing out your fast, grin, and bear it advice to her.

As per the latter bit of your post, she didn't propose to him. He asked her to marry him. So how did she force herself on him?

Guy pls. You're misyarning again.

EfemenaXY:


Lol!

Now this is crazy!

EfemenaXY:



What do you mean by act otherwise? Why put conditions to your "emphatic" YES? I didn't see any of those conditions of yours whilst dishing out your fast, grin, and bear it advice to her.

As per the latter bit of your post, she didn't propose to him. He asked her to marry him. So how did she force herself on him?

Guy pls. You're misyarning again.

Sophyrocks:


The guy sef never answer your question o. Lol. You see how its soooo easy to advise others but very difficult to follow your own advice? that tells you that people hardly put themselves in the shoes of whomever they are advising.

EfemenaXY:


What do you mean "speak some sense into his head"? Does the man's request for a divorce sound unreasonable to you? Is he a confused child? Are you not aware that sometimes, it's best to stop flogging a dead horse? Why should she try to fix what doesn't want to be fixed?