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Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Women In STEM / Why Do Men And Women In Diaspora Come To Naija To Marry / What Does 'submission' Of Women In Marriages Mean Exactly? (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by Chillis: 1:46pm On Dec 30, 2014
moca:
Chillipepper, tell them to release ur handle now.
Wetin be this kain winchery?

How r u and family, compliments! kiss

I don kia about the handle. If I breeze in here, and I notice say them ban the moniker, I open another one.

No time to beg alusi okija. cheesy

Coogar is always fighting and cussung yet they dont ban him. I'm suspecting he is the one that ban people sef
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bukatyne(f): 1:47pm On Dec 30, 2014
Chillis:


I don't do protest. I do my sh1t silently. You want those hungry looking niajirians to kidnap and butcher me .

Besides, most of them girls are comfortable with their 100naira 'recearch' cards they are getting.

They are comfortable the way they are. I only Help those who want to be helped.


All other mgbekes can stick to what they love best.
I wan enjoy my life abeg. I no be Jesus who sacrificed for the ones he loved. At least he knew he will rise again on the third day cheesy

Stillfire carry go.
Education is all. Most of them girls with all their education prefers sitting in the kitchen and giving births. Why did they even go to school at the first place

@first bold: It is important so efforts are not wasted chasing the wind

@second bold: I wonder also.
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by coogar: 1:51pm On Dec 30, 2014
Chillis:


I don kia about the handle. If I breeze in here, and I notice say them ban the moniker, I open another one.

No time to beg alusi okija. cheesy

Coogar is always fighting and cussung yet they dont ban him. I'm suspecting he is the one that ban people sef

buhahahaha
my prayers are answered - chillisauce's ban is a way of ensuring peace & harmony in this community. grin
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by Nobody: 1:52pm On Dec 30, 2014
Chillis:


I don't do protest. I do my sh1t silently. You want those hungry looking niajirians to kidnap and butcher me .

Besides, most of them girls are comfortable with their 100naira 'recearch' cards they are getting.

They are comfortable the way they are. I only Help those who want to be helped.

All other mgbekes can stick to what they love best.
I wan enjoy my life abeg. I no be Jesus who sacrificed for the ones he loved. At least he knew he will rise again on the third day cheesy

Stillfire carry go.
Education is all. Most of them girls with all their education prefers sitting in the kitchen and giving births. Why did they even go to school at the first place


I know one that is going for a PHD but has no intention of working because her husband won't have a working wife, some are in dire situation and really can't figure a way out. Guess they signed up for it, he won't even let her have a little business by the side.
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bukatyne(f): 1:53pm On Dec 30, 2014
bellong:


Hmm... I have natural God given assets too. Which of the assets are you thinking, capital or liability? cheesy



Those few ones will always be around as long as the world exist. They are incurable medieval people that unfortunately came in the jet age.. We shouldn't subject discussions to the myopic thinking of those few people.

Meanwhile, Bukatyne when are you contesting for an elective position in Nigeria?

LOL @ capital and liability

@Politics... I nor get strength! I played a little in school which was an eye opener... Somehow some people's thinking just stops there. I don't know if politics suddenly closes their minds... It comes a terrible struggle to do what is right. I actually prayed for my office more than my academics sef.

I edited and edited my manifesto so that I do not promise what I cannot deliver.

If I am appointed into a position and I see I can make an impact there (not all these shut up positions), I will go for it and my integrity starts to be messed up, biko, I am so bailing out.

There are other ways to make impact grin

You are going into politics?
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bellong: 1:54pm On Dec 30, 2014
Stillfire:

People who make arguments that it is African tradition for a woman to be tied in the kitchen and be used for rearing purposes only and not as drivers of a working society. Many girls have imbibed this alien attitude today and rest on their oars.

Should we rather not blame ladies who accept and believe these claims/notions? If I say you are ugly, will you believe me or thrash the statement?

Those with such notions are not as many or much compared to those who believe women should and must contribute to developing a working society.
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bukatyne(f): 1:55pm On Dec 30, 2014
byvan:



I know one that is going for a PHD but has no intention of working because her husband won't have a working wife, some are in dire situation and really can't figure a way out.

Is it not going to be more frustrating for her? Like smelling meat you can't eat?

Did she know his stance pre-marriage?
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by Stillfire: 1:56pm On Dec 30, 2014
byvan:



I know one that is going for a PHD but has no intention of working because her husband won't have a working wife, some are in dire situation and really can't figure a way out.

Bellong this is what I'm talking about.
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bellong: 1:57pm On Dec 30, 2014
bukatyne:


LOL @ capital and liability

@Politics... I nor get strength! I played a little in school which was an eye opener... Somehow some people's thinking just stops there. I don't know if politics suddenly closes their minds... It comes a terrible struggle to do what is right. I actually prayed for my office more than my academics sef.

I edited and edited my manifesto so that I do not promise what I cannot deliver.

If I am appointed into a position and I see I can make an impact there (not all these shut up positions), I will go for it and my integrity starts to be messed up, biko, I am so bailing out.

There are other ways to make impact grin

You are going into politics?

I understand your position about not wanting to dent your integrity.

Yes, I will delve into politics when the time comes. Its high time we taught Nigerians what good governance, rule of law and transparency are.
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by Chillis: 1:57pm On Dec 30, 2014
byvan:



I know one that is going for a PHD but has no intention of working because her husband won't have a working wife, some are in dire situation and really can't figure a way out.

PhD for mouth. When her counterparts are talking and doing, she is memorizing in the kitchen.

She better get something doing even if it's part time.
I will understand if the kids are still young. When kids are in school , what will she be doing ?

Na dem dey first answer doc Mrs okujagu. grin
Just like Nigerian mechanics like the title engr
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bellong: 2:00pm On Dec 30, 2014
Stillfire:


Bellong this is what I'm talking about.

I am interested in their agreement prior to the marriage. We can't crucify the husband if he already told her during courtship and she agreed to it.

It is why I will not blame the husband but the lady who agreed to marrying him and crying foul later.


Nevertheless, she can use her advanced studies in discovering or inventing how chores can further be simplified in the kitchen. Positives can always come from negativity... cheesy grin
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bukatyne(f): 2:00pm On Dec 30, 2014
bellong:


I understand your position about not wanting to dent your integrity.

Yes, I will delve into politics when the time comes. Its high time we taught Nigerians what good governance, rule of law and transparency are.

Happy delving grin

Remember your sister in the Lord when the time cometh cheesy

My former Sunday school teacher had the same discussion with me some weeks back

Who knows, when you guys get there, we will follow wink
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by Nobody: 2:01pm On Dec 30, 2014

1 Like

Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by Chillis: 2:02pm On Dec 30, 2014
coogar:


buhahahaha
my prayers are answered - chillisauce's ban is a way of ensuring peace & harmony in this community. grin

You know I don't break rules . I don't look for trouble too.
I stay in my lane.

Btw where is pickabeau, I read a thread here that his girlfriend said we should tell him she loves him.

No wonder he has changed. Since he started charity work, he has got some free cochie offline. grin

I suspect it was pickabeau.

2 Likes

Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by Nobody: 2:02pm On Dec 30, 2014
bukatyne:


Is it not going to be more frustrating for her? Like smelling meat you can't eat?

Did she know his stance pre-marriage?




She doesn't but the dude obviously knows she is very pliable, she is serving the house 'wifeship' like a jail term and the fact that he refused her having a little business, even if she has to get a manager for it and still stay home is what I don't get. I completely took my hands off her matter and just say " nah so now " when ever she starts telling me stories that touch undecided.
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bellong: 2:03pm On Dec 30, 2014
bukatyne:

Happy delving grin

Remember your sister in the Lord when the time cometh cheesy

My former Sunday school teacher had the same discussion with me some weeks back

Who knows, when you guys get there, we will follow wink

Can't forget a pseudo-feminist cheesy You will help educate women on how they can contribute meaningfully to development and growth without peruvian hairs... grin
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by Chillis: 2:03pm On Dec 30, 2014
bukatyne:


@first bold: It is important so efforts are not wasted chasing the wind

@second bold: I wonder also.

I learnt the hard way .
I'm very straight forward . I tell you the first time, you take another route, I leave you to it.

You can't help someone that doesn't wanna be helped
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bukatyne(f): 2:04pm On Dec 30, 2014
Nonso23:
Very interesting! Though i'm aware of most of the stuffs contained in the o.p and subsequent related posts i'm surprised at one thing.

Africans or more specifically the Nigerian ethnic groups were a lot more ahead of their western counterparts in gender relations and equity until the Europeans thought the system was not 'right' and eventually succeeded in crushing that balance as we knew it with their power as colonialists leaving us for the worse.
Today though they do not colonize our lands, our thoughts and perception of everything is not only colonized by them but also ruled by their subtle messages covered in all kinds of alluring packages. We gradually are being left again for the worse.

Africa never marginalized the female gender. Certain practices may appear absurd today but they were agreed upon by all parties before they were carried out in the olden days. The men did not invent killing of twins. The community of old did. The men did not invent the ridiculous rites a widow must undergo after the death of her husband, the primitive society did, the men did not invent the laws that a woman should not own lands the primitive society did and that primitive society was made up of men, women and their children. Nobody should be blamed for anything. If ever we are going to develop in any way then our indigenous cultures should be modified to suit the current times. Nothing is more embarrassing than a people without a history. The Chinese did it and are currently the strongest economy in the world. They should be our role models.

Our culture is very rich and i agree that we have some very dark patches in it but we also have a lot of good aspects and funny, ridiculous components too. To neglect these areas and focus on blaming the men for where we are today will portray the current flock of women as weak and cowardly. That is not what the women of old were. They stood up for what they wanted worked for it and earned their respect. They knew what 'responsibility' meant. No sane man will dare to disrespect such a woman. Our grandmothers were not obnoxious, hateful, denigrating nor self-centred - the 'virtues' our women today embrace with dexterity (at least on the internet). Today, women have equal rights to education. Certain areas in Nigeria have the quota system in place to correct any cultural marginalization. Women are equipped to also contribute to Africa's development as they once did but unfortunately the most vocal ones would rather argue that women should smoke because a lot of men doing so or how women should go topless because the men can. Very absurd.

Our mothers were dedicated to their homes and prided themselves on the success of their family. They were respectful to their husbands and never hinged their loyalty on his earning power. Today all that is almost fantasy. If the women will only realise that that wife beater, that 419, that rapiist, that armed robber, that loafer, that cheat, that murderer was trained by both a woman and her man and that the currently terrible society we live in has as much input from the woman as the man can we can talk about moving forward. Till then we will still buy into the same unsuitable western ideologies damaging both the west and their homes; us and everything we stand for.


AFRICA NEEDS EDUCATION!


How can women be there when they were making foolish customs and still be called 'strong' women?

1 Like

Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by Nobody: 2:06pm On Dec 30, 2014
Chillis:


PhD for mouth. When her counterparts are talking and doing, she is memorizing in the kitchen.

She better get something doing even if it's part time.
I will understand if the kids are still young. When kids are in school , what will she be doing ?

Na dem dey first answer doc Mrs okujagu. grin
Just like Nigerian mechanics like the title engr


There really is no hope for her till God changes her husband's mind, she falls into the category of those that did rather die than not be a wife, her matter tire me and I no dey put mouth before dey carry me do make up sex.
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by Stillfire: 2:06pm On Dec 30, 2014
bellong:


Should we rather not blame ladies who accept and believe these claims/notions? If I say you are ugly, will you believe me or thrash the statement?

Those with such notions are not as many or much compared to those who believe women should and must contribute to developing a working society.

I do o. However many women have been domesticated to believe such about themselves. You would agree with me that when people have been mentally enslaved for long they tend to believe what they shouldn't.
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bukatyne(f): 2:08pm On Dec 30, 2014
bellong:


Can't forget a pseudo-feminist cheesy You will help educate women on how they can contribute meaningfully to development and growth without peruvian hairs... grin

LOL @ pseudo-feminist

I have been called several things on this forum: old, bitter, married, single, divorced, jobless, mean etc. someone even called me an anti-feminist shocked shocked shocked shocked because I did not support men taking care of their divorced wives cheesy Now the reigning is pseudo-feminist (pf for short) or fake because I say men are the head of their homes.

I don't wear human hair... I feel it is wrong. The head is the carrier of one's glory; how can you put someone else's hair on your head

Tufiakwa!
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bellong: 2:12pm On Dec 30, 2014
Stillfire:


I do o. However many women have been domesticated to believe such about themselves. You would agree with me that when people have been mentally enslaved for long they tend to believe what they shouldn't.

This is the point where their parents can be blamed for raising weaklings and wind like beings. One of the reasons I advocate a strong and stable families in building a great and working society because families make up the society.

A home where the husband and wife understand their respective roles in bringing up their children as well as maintaining healthy family institution will churn out children that will not be rejects of the society or tormentors of anything progressive.

First step is, if you plan to marry, you should strive to marry a man with good head on his neck or else..... cheesy
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by Stillfire: 2:14pm On Dec 30, 2014
bellong:


I am interested in their agreement prior to the marriage. We can't crucify the husband if he already told her during courtship and she agreed to it.

It is why I will not blame the husband but the lady who agreed to marrying him and crying foul later.


Nevertheless, she can use her advanced studies in discovering or inventing how chores can further be simplified in the kitchen. Positives can always come from negativity... cheesy grin

You do have a point.
Lol @ the last statement.
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bellong: 2:15pm On Dec 30, 2014
bukatyne:


LOL @ pseudo-feminist

I have been called several things on this forum: old, bitter, married, single, divorced, jobless, mean etc. someone even called me an anti-feminist shocked shocked shocked shocked because I did not support men taking care of their divorced wives cheesy Now the reigning is pseudo-feminist (pf for short) or fake because I say men are the head of their homes.

I don't wear human hair... I feel it is wrong. The head is the carrier of one's glory; how can you put someone else's hair on your head

Tufiakwa!

shocked shocked shocked You have been called several names? I called you a Pseudo-Feminist because I read a thread you created for and about feminists... The name is from you.

Have you seen a documentary on how Indian hairs are donated to temples before being sold by the priests?
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by Nobody: 2:16pm On Dec 30, 2014
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bukatyne(f): 2:17pm On Dec 30, 2014
Chillis:


I learnt the hard way .
I'm very straight forward . I tell you the first time, you take another route, I leave you to it.

You can't help someone that doesn't wanna be helped

You even become frustrated when investments are not yielding results
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by Stillfire: 2:19pm On Dec 30, 2014
bellong:


This is the point where their parents can be blamed for raising weaklings and wind like beings. One of the reasons I advocate a strong and stable families in building a great and working society because families make up the society.

A home where the husband and wife understand their respective roles in bringing up their children as well as maintaining healthy family institution will churn out children that will not be rejects of the society or tormentors of anything progressive.
First step is, if you plan to marry, you should strive to marry a man with good head on his neck or else..... cheesy

Do you think respective roles may differ from home to home in today's world and may not be set in stone as it were in the past?
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bukatyne(f): 2:19pm On Dec 30, 2014
bellong:


shocked shocked shocked You have been called several names? I called you a Pseudo-Feminist because I read a thread you created for and about feminists... The name is from you.

Have you seen a documentary on how Indian hairs are donated to temples before being sold by the priests?

Read again...

No be me call myself pseudo anything embarassed

Hair that they have probably chanted on. It is well (it gives me the creeps). I imagine Mrs. Bellong cutting her hair and I fix it after treatment shocked shocked shocked shocked shocked shocked shocked shocked shocked shocked
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bukatyne(f): 2:24pm On Dec 30, 2014
Nonso23:


Contrary to the generally believed opinion that women were non-participatory members of the community, they were an integral portion of the society of old. No suggestions were passed as laws in the land until every section of the community agreed upon it.
The origin of the christian mothers association today lies with the interest group the women formed in the olden days to voice out their displeasure, opinions and suggestions to the community.

Our society did not bully nor intimidate women. Those records are western just the way the Europeans sold to us the lies that our traditional religion was of the devil but that is a story for another day.

I know there were strong women as individuals e.g. Moremi, Amina, Efunsetan etc. As for collective strength, I honestly don't know lipsrsealed lipsrsealed Well we have the Aba women riot...

These whites also came from the same place. In times of old, the women actually had to pay dowry to the husbands, did not work, did not vote, etc. etc. before they went back to the drawing board and changed things.

Our traditional religion is ... lipsrsealed
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by bukatyne(f): 2:28pm On Dec 30, 2014
byvan:





She doesn't but the dude obviously knows she is very pliable, she is serving the house 'wifeship' like a jail term and the fact that he refused her having a little business, even if she has to get a manager for it and still stay home is what I don't get. I completely took my hands off her matter and just say " nah so now " when ever she starts telling me stories that touch undecided.

You certainly do not want to be termed a 'home breaker'

All I know is a frustrated wife is not the best for the kids/home.... Results are not achieved
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by Nobody: 2:35pm On Dec 30, 2014
Re: Women In The Development Of Nigeria Since Pre-colonial Times by Nobody: 2:40pm On Dec 30, 2014
bukatyne:


You certainly do not want to be termed a 'home breaker'

All I know is a frustrated wife is not the best for the kids/home.... Results are not achieved




She probably might not be frustrated, some had no dreams.

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