I met this lady shortly after I breaking up with my ex girl on health ground. After we split, i was in great pain till i met my present girl. from the moment I met her, i felt a very big relief and ever since I've kept on loving her more and more by the day, So I decide to tie the nut.
I engaged her, planning to get married to her by june. but her mum is kind of against the union cos she said I'm not from their tribe.(that's what she said).
To discourage the union her mum threaten of telling me of her passed, being sure she hasn't told me. This is why she is just telling me, that she had been married before. That the marriage lasted for about 10 months, no church wedding and there is also no child between them. I'm so worried because of my parents. Their reaction will not be good if i tell them, and If i don't tell my parents before time, and they happens to know of it on the wrong time maybe on the marriage ceremony, (someone said such traditional marriage is always done in a different manner so they will end up knowing).I'm sure their reaction will not be good. And if i tell them now, it might one way or the other affect the marriage because they wouldn't want to be involve and i can not go for the marriage without the company of my people. I'm confuse on how to handle my parents. But for me I'm still ready to go on with the marriage. Only I wonder why she didn't tell me till she was threatened. pls air ur view and advise me on how and when could be the best time to discuss this with my parents.

Speechless

sit ur self down


RE THINK...

and take a decision

IF U ALLOW PEOPLE TAKE DECISIONS FOR YOU THEN YOU ARE STILL A KID.

That she has a child from her previous relationship or she is divorcee shouldn't stop you as long as you are confident that she's what you want.
But you should also try to understand why her previous marriage didn't work.

IF YOU ALLOW PEOPLE TAKE DECISION THEN YOU ARE STILL A KID

Can you disclose the reason why her first marriage crashed??

You're old enough to make your own decisions, and if you really love the girl, you can go on and marry her, but you have to really know why she was not able to have a child in her previous marriage, you can discuss this with her, and whatever the outcome maybe, which i know will hopefully be a good thing! you can go on and marry her.

Ok, Marry Her

You are marrying her for love not for her history!

Speak to an elder is your family. Some things are too high for just an individual. Remember, she's not just marrying you, but being married to your family... Try to carry them along

deavicky:
I met this lady shortly after I broke up my ex, due to health grounds. After the brake up I had been in pains till i met this my presen girl. from the moment I met her, i felt a very big relief and ever since i ve developed more love for her and also became happy again. I love her and I ve engaged her but just wanting for her mum's approval before the marriage proper. The problem I have now, she just told me she had been married before and the marriage last for about a year no child and the church wedding was also not done before the marriage crashed. I'm so confused because I cannot handle a case like this alone. I will have to discuss it with family members and I fear they may not welcome it. And even if I decide not to tell them, they will still know during the traditional marriage and I also don't think that is the right place and time for them to know. Please I need ur advise.

but my question is why is she just telling u dis after getting engaged with er? I smell shit..guy I will move oo..

just make proper enquiries as to why she broke up with her husband so u wont carry anoda man's problem

deavicky:
I met this lady shortly after I broke up my ex, due to health grounds. After the brake up I had been in pains till i met this my presen girl. from the moment I met her, i felt a very big relief and ever since i ve developed more love for her and also became happy again. I love her and I ve engaged her but just wanting for her mum's approval before the marriage proper. The problem I have now, she just told me she had been married before and the marriage last for about a year no child and the church wedding was also not done before the marriage crashed. I'm so confused because I cannot handle a case like this alone. I will have to discuss it with family members and I fear they may not welcome it. And even if I decide not to tell them, they will still know during the traditional marriage and I also don't think that is the right place and time for them to know. Please I need ur advise.

Helo. I want to post your story to our facebook page for more advices. On facebook search for, Nigerian Papalette. But i need your opinion.

Sweetmarriage:


Helo. I want to post your story to our facebook page for more advices. On facebook search for, Nigerian Papalette. But i need your opinion.

please don't.

Rikidony:
IF YOU ALLOW PEOPLE TAKE DECISION THEN YOU ARE STILL A KID

I don suffer see u small boy talking to me by the way who invited here?what do u know about life? Anyway it's not ur fault.

first get help help with your English

If U know what U want and u've found it, GO FOR IT .

Marrying a divorced woman is ADULTERY..

Op you can marry her if she's ok for you, I didnt mention love cos they say it's not enough so you know what I mean...

BUTBUTBUT where I have issues with her is (1). why is she just telling you now? I think she's capable of still hiding more disastrous secrets abt her...(2).. about being married for a year without an issue, pls were they making love? was there a miscarriage of any kind?? If she can't have a baby for u now (God forbid) will you be able to handle it??

deavicky:
I don suffer see u small boy talking to me by the way who invited here?what do u know about life? Anyway it's not ur fault.

IF u really are in need of help u shouldn't call someone a "small boy"

Maturity and Age are two different things



And he gave u a good advise sef


Call me toddler too....we know ur type

There is nothing wrong with your fiance. She had a marriage that didn't last. That is no reflection on her as a woman. If anything, she has learned from that relationship on things to and not to do. Many people have been divorced before. What is the difference between now and before?

I have been divorced before TWICE. I have a child from my first marriage. I told my current fiance up front. MY son and fiance talk to one another. He didn't tell his family because he was worried. I told them myself and they really do not care. They are Bini if that matters at all. I have no shame in being divorced. Life happens. You live and you learn.

Back in the days where we thought some problem can not be solved.

Hmm...
Have you asked her why the first marriage failed?
You just want to go ahead because you love her. What if she was the cause of her former failed marriage?

I'll advise you go to the mum and ask her to tell you in details why the first marriage didnt work out. I'm sure since shes not in support of both of you, she'll gladly download everything to you. Then you can decide if you want to go ahead with it or not. Also consider your parents. Theres no way you can sideline them in matters like this.

I really wonder why she didn't tell you from the very beginning of the relationship if her mom didn't made the move of telling you, you wouldn't have known has well my friend start the issue with her let her tell you everything than you can start from there

Marrying a divorced woman is adultery... Read ya Bible.

The problem is not getting married before.

What should be your concern is why did she hide it from you


Nd what really happened that it didn't work out. bro you need to open your eyes and don't be blinded by love. there is more to the stories.

Relax reason like a man and make a decision only you can advice ur self in this situation because in the end is always gonna be u and not us here in nl

100Cents:
Marrying a divorced woman is ADULTERY..

the Bible was written based on the Hebrew tradition,as at then you hardly see women misbehaving or had sex before wedding on like what you see today.

deavicky:
I met this lady shortly after I breaking up with my ex girl on health ground. After we split, i was in great pain till i met my present girl. from the moment I met her, i felt a very big relief and ever since I've kept on loving her more and more by the day, So I decide to tie the nut.
I engaged her, planning to get married to her by june. but her mum is kind of against the union cos she said I'm not from their tribe.(that's what she said).
To discourage the union her mum threaten of telling me of her passed, being sure she hasn't told me. This is why she is just telling me, that she had been married before. That the marriage lasted for about 10 months, no church wedding and there is also no child between them. I'm so worried because of my parents. Their reaction will not be good if i tell them, and If i don't tell my parents before time, and they happens to know of it on the wrong time maybe on the marriage ceremony, (someone said such traditional marriage is always done in a different manner so they will end up knowing).I'm sure their reaction will not be good. And if i tell them now, it might one way or the other affect the marriage because they wouldn't want to be involve and i can not go for the marriage without the company of my people. I'm confuse on how to handle my parents. But for me I'm still ready to go on with the marriage. Only I wonder why she didn't tell me till she was threatened. pls air ur view and advise me on how and when could be the best time to discuss this with my parents.

Run for your life. The woman i married hid everything from me, After wedding child bearing is a major challenge now as I speak, she was even married before but hid it and she is even far older than me before i could know was when I went to her immediate elder sister's burial.that night no be small fight,till now the fight is still on.six months after wedding she started complaining about her stomach, went for a scan is was fibroids.Check why she left the first marriage if you can't get any tangible information please please please please Run.......... For your life.

The decision is yhurs to take...

Be a man...