.

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Yes! Continue

Oya cont.

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go on

Great... Continue

Nyc go on

NYC GO ON

Okay, continue sire

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Cybershow, stuff46, simonhabby, Fatalveli, Bluestarry, please I need critiques sir.

Timpaker, you can whine someone wo. I will throw a Thanksgiving party and pay Michael Jackson to play when I write something like 'The Convict'.

Ayamlaykorn

Laykorn..ur punctuation are normal and the story z making sense wit dat o...bt let me kal oga stuff46 weda e has anitin to xay

A very nice story; but you need to do something about those punctuations and some of the sentence constructions.

Truly a nice job. Well done, sir.

#Ayamlarrysun

LarrySun:
A very nice story; but you need to do something about those punctuations and some of the sentence constructions.

Truly a nice job. Well done, sir.

#Ayamlarrysun

you did'nt come out with your dictionary today?

Its like he did not remember to add his suffix today, and tho you have remembered it. He is one of his kind.

My guy, the story did not potray the title with these tho buh it was awesome.
Work on puntuation and sentence construction as my oga said and maybe try re-edittinq before posting like your tosin's diary to make it clean and error free. With this i think your next story would be captivating like this one. Just stick to writing rules, always strive to give the best in you.

am loving this story.

you are doing a great job

Laykorn, though this story is superb and I would have point out the critiques but I really don't understand it.

Too many characters

Punctuations

Spacing

Vocabs

I'll kIp ConNeCteD

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I love this!