Welcome, Guest: Join Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 2,507,835 members, 5,712,240 topics. Date: Tuesday, 07 July 2020 at 07:53 PM

Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? - Culture - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Culture / Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? (75734 Views)

The 10 Most Expensive Cultures/tribes In Nigeria To Marry From / If You Don't Have 500,000naira, You CANT Marry From Nsukka (pic Proof) / 10 Most Expensive Cultures To Marry From In Nigeria (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) ... (25) (Reply) (Go Down)

Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Nobody: 9:59pm On Feb 20, 2015
A friend of mine has being dating a guy for some years now. She's not an Anambrarian. She's a very lovely lady,beautiful, kind, down to earth and she loves the guy so much.

I'm worried because the guy hasn't proposed and he is from Anambra state . I don't know if he'll eventually marry her because I've heard and I've seen a lot of people from Anambra state marrying from their tribe.

I need to know why they do that even when most times it's against their wish. What's your advice for her? Don't you think that the guy may eventually leave her for an Anambra Lady?

Thanks

5 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by unofficial(m): 10:19pm On Feb 20, 2015
Your friend or you?

157 Likes 10 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by nzeobi(m): 10:35pm On Feb 20, 2015
We prefer people who understand us better. Nobody will marry from a tribe that will be using his hard earned money for owambe and stuffs like that.
Since we hardly divorce we are always careful
Ka chineke mezie okwu

238 Likes 8 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by CHM11: 10:41pm On Feb 20, 2015
Dear OP, please leave igbos alone if you are not igbo. Let them keep marrying themselves, its better for them.

I just pity peeps who date igbos!!,..especially igbos who live or have lived in the east...how do you cope with them??

Had to live amongst some east-based igbo guys and ladies during my NYSC..... Worst experience of my life....
Its worse that when they are told they are hard to understand, they all fall back to insulting in their local dialect.. You will hear things like ewu, anuofia etc...proving my point again....

igbo ndị karịsịa ndị na-dabeere nọ n'ebe ọwụwa anyanwụ dị
nnọọ na-akpa ọchị ndị mmadụ. Ha anaghị akpa àgwà ka
nkịtị mmadụ. Ndị njem dị anya ma obosara ịmụta na-akpa
àgwà dị mma ma ndị na-ahụ n'ebe ọwụwa anyanwụ bụ nanị
larịị na ụmụ anụmanụ. Onye ọ bụla na-anaghị amasị nwere
ike iji kacha nso eriri ka kpọgidere ya onwe ya. na-akpa ọchị
ndị mmadụ.

Plenty tongue out!!!!

92 Likes 6 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Nobody: 10:52pm On Feb 20, 2015
unofficial:
Your friend or you?
My friend oh.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Nobody: 10:54pm On Feb 20, 2015
CHM11:
Dear OP, please leave igbos alone if you are not igbo. Let them keep marrying themselves, its better for them.

I just pity peeps who date igbos!!,..especially igbos who live or have lived in the east...how do you cope with them??

Had to live amongst some east-based igbo guys and ladies during my NYSC..... Worst experience of my life...
Lolz really?where r u from?wat tribe?

2 Likes

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by CHM11: 11:18pm On Feb 20, 2015
sleekangel85:
Lolz really?where r u from?wat tribe?
Delta/Urhobo
Served in a PPA with 15 corpers, 11 were igbos and it was hell for the 4 of us non igbos.

50 Likes

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Nobody: 11:59pm On Feb 20, 2015
CHM11:

Delta/Urhobo
Served in a PPA with 15 corpers, 11 were igbos and it was hell for the 4 of us non igbos.
okies.

2 Likes

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by bigfrancis21: 12:02am On Feb 21, 2015
CHM11:

Delta/Urhobo
Served in a PPA with 15 corpers, 11 were igbos and it was hell for the 4 of us non igbos.

Do you mind telling us your experience?

3 Likes

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Nobody: 12:09am On Feb 21, 2015
nzeobi:
We prefer people who understand us better. Nobody will marry from a tribe that will using his hard earned money for owambe and stuffs like that.
Ka chineke mezie okwu
So are u trying to say dat if u marry from another tribe u guys won't understand yourselves? I believe dat what keeps a relationship long lasting is love and respect nd come think of it it's high time anambra men dat reason like you change their notion about marrying from their tribe because u think u'll understand her better .my dear if dats ur reason for getting married from ur tribe,den I'm sorry u 'll miss it.Haven't u seen married couple of d same tribe living as cat nd mice? Tribe shouldn't be a barrier for d choice of a life partner.Ask God for direction nd wisdom.

22 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by bigfrancis21: 1:54am On Feb 21, 2015
sleekangel85:
So are u trying to say dat if u marry from another tribe u guys won't understand yourselves? I believe dat what keeps a relationship long lasting is love and respect nd come think of it it's high time anambra men dat reason like you change their notion about marrying from their tribe because u think u'll understand her better .my dear if dats ur reason for getting married from ur tribe,den I'm sorry u 'll miss it.Haven't u seen married couple of d same tribe living as cat nd mice? Tribe shouldn't be a barrier for d choice of a life partner.Ask God for direction nd wisdom.

Igbo bashing has become quite a common thing in Nigeria such that it has become normal to bash Igbo on every single thing, even on things that are meaningless.

You created this thread to ask why Igbo prefer to marry from their tribe. Are you really serious? This is a question you opened this thread for looking for 'answers'? Would you have opened this very thread in the first place had a Yoruba or Hausa guy been the one who preferred to marry from their tribe? Yes or No? Why would a Yoruba parent reject a non-yoruba suitor, and that will not be an issue. In fact, such action is justified. A Hausa parent will do the same and no dust will be raised about it. But when an Igbo parent does the same, then its a big deal. It is a serious issue that calls for serious attention and criticism, then you begin to get tags like ''Igbos are 'tribalistic'', 'they are 'selfish'', it is an 'Igbo problem' e.t.c. Minor issues that aren't issues when done by other tribes become a serious issue when Igbo is involved.

I look around me, majority Ibibios marry within the Ibibio tribe, majority Hausas marry within Hausa, Yoruba within Yoruba, why should the Igbo marrying within themselves even be a question in the first place? Despite the level of inter marriage between whites and blacks here in the US, majority whites marry within whites, chinese within chinese, blacks within blacks, and you're going to sit there and tell me that it is a problem when Igbos prefer to marry Igbos?? Like seriously??

I get your point about love being the most important factor between 2 people from different tribes and there are marriages between Igbo men and non-Igbo women however majority Igbos don't need to look outside for love when they can find it within themselves. The same love you mentioned as important, Igbo men get it from within the tribe. Why look outside? What about culture preservation and values? Why should Igbo preferring to marry from within even be an issue in the first place when other tribes are doing the same? Is the creation of this thread even justified in the first place?

Igbo people are tribalistic, they are evil, they love money, yet you want to marry them? Seriously?

Tomorrow you're going to open another thread asking 'Why do Igbo people speak Igbo?' Like seriously??

589 Likes 71 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Nobody: 8:32am On Feb 21, 2015
bigfrancis21:


Igbo bashing has become quite a common thing in Nigeria such that it has become normal to bash Igbo on every single thing, even on things that are meaningless.

You created this thread to ask why Igbo prefer to marry from their tribe. Are you really serious? This is a question you opened this thread for looking for 'answers'? Would you have opened this very thread in the first place had a Yoruba or Hausa guy been the one who preferred to marry from their tribe? Yes or No? Why would a Yoruba parent reject a non-yoruba suitor, and that will not be an issue. In fact, such action is justified. A Hausa parent will do the same and no dust will be raised about it. But when an Igbo parent does the same, then its a big deal. It is a serious issue that calls for serious attention and criticism, then you begin to get tags like ''Igbos are 'tribalistic'', 'they are 'selfish'', it is an 'Igbo problem' e.t.c. Minor issues that aren't issues when done by other tribes become a serious issue when Igbo is involved.

I look around me, majority Ibibios marry within the Ibibio tribe, majority Hausas marry within Hausa, Yoruba within Yoruba, why should the Igbo marrying within themselves even be a question in the first place? Despite the level of inter marriage between whites and blacks here in the US, majority whites marry within whites, chinese within chinese, blacks within blacks, and you're going to sit there and tell me that it is a problem when Igbos prefer to marry Igbos??

I get your point about love being the most important factor between 2 people from different tribes and there are marriages between Igbo men and non-Igbo women however majority Igbos don't need to look outside for love when they can find it within themselves. The same love you mentioned as important, Igbo men get it from within the tribe. Why look outside? What about culture preservation and values? Why should Igbo preferring to marry from within even be an issue in the first place when other tribes are doing the same? Is the creation of this thread even justified in the first place?

Tomorrow you're going to open another thread asking 'Why do Igbo people speak Igbo?' Like seriously??
If you check my thread,it's a question not an allegation all you needed to do was to give ur advice to d Lady.I know d Yorubas nd Hausas do dat but in dis case d guy is igbo.You Igbo guys aren't giving me answers dat I want instead u r paranoid.Abeg no be me start am oh.

27 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by CHM11: 8:51am On Feb 21, 2015
sleekangel85:
If you check my thread,it's a question not an allegation all you needed to do was to give ur advice to d Lady.I know d Yorubas nd Hausas do dat but in dis case d guy is igbo.You Igbo guys aren't giving me answers dat I want instead u r paranoid.Abeg no be me start am oh.

I've noticed that Nairalanders based in the USA can write long epistles, couldn't even finish my igbo brother's comment.
But I get his point.
@bigfrancis21 nice point, but here's my view.
Others do it doesn't make I right.
Additionally, Nigeria is made up of major 3 regions. North west and east. The people in the North inter marry freely, fulani, gwarri, benue, hausa, Tiv etc....people in the west intermarry freely too, yoruba, egun, badagry, etc. But because tribes in the EAST are much, igbo's don't like marrying others and its justified because it favours them better.

I for example wouldn't want any of family member to marry an igbo man or woman, I'd rather marry a yoruba or even a fulani. This is because I have not had a good experience as regards the igbos I've encountered in life.
All in all, igbos!!..marry yourselves, its good for you bcause other tribes will hardly understand your behavior and character.

65 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Nobody: 9:00am On Feb 21, 2015
CHM11:


I've noticed that Nairalanders based in the USA can write long epistles, couldn't even finish my igbo brother's comment.
But I get his point.
@bigfrancis21 nice point, but here's my view.
Others do it doesn't make I right.
Additionally, Nigeria is made up of major 3 regions. North west and east. The people in the North inter marry freely, fulani, gwarri, benue, hausa, Tiv etc....people in the west intermarry freely too, yoruba, egun, badagry, etc. But because tribes in the EAST are much, igbo's don't like marrying others and its justified because it favours them better.

I for example wouldn't want any of family member to marry an igbo man or woman, I'd rather marry a yoruba or even a fulani. This is because I have not had a good experience as regards the igbos I've encountered in life.
All in all, igbos!!..marry yourselves, its good for you bcause other tribes will hardly understand your behavior and character.
Lols grin

17 Likes

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by ammyluv2002(f): 9:11am On Feb 21, 2015
bigfrancis21:


Igbo bashing has become quite a common thing in Nigeria such that it has become normal to bash Igbo on every single thing, even on things that are meaningless.

You created this thread to ask why Igbo prefer to marry from their tribe. Are you really serious? This is a question you opened this thread for looking for 'answers'? Would you have opened this very thread in the first place had a Yoruba or Hausa guy been the one who preferred to marry from their tribe? Yes or No? Why would a Yoruba parent reject a non-yoruba suitor, and that will not be an issue. In fact, such action is justified. A Hausa parent will do the same and no dust will be raised about it. But when an Igbo parent does the same, then its a big deal. It is a serious issue that calls for serious attention and criticism, then you begin to get tags like ''Igbos are 'tribalistic'', 'they are 'selfish'', it is an 'Igbo problem' e.t.c. Minor issues that aren't issues when done by other tribes become a serious issue when Igbo is involved.

I look around me, majority Ibibios marry within the Ibibio tribe, majority Hausas marry within Hausa, Yoruba within Yoruba, why should the Igbo marrying within themselves even be a question in the first place? Despite the level of inter marriage between whites and blacks here in the US, majority whites marry within whites, chinese within chinese, blacks within blacks, and you're going to sit there and tell me that it is a problem when Igbos prefer to marry Igbos??

I get your point about love being the most important factor between 2 people from different tribes and there are marriages between Igbo men and non-Igbo women however majority Igbos don't need to look outside for love when they can find it within themselves. The same love you mentioned as important, Igbo men get it from within the tribe. Why look outside? What about culture preservation and values? Why should Igbo preferring to marry from within even be an issue in the first place when other tribes are doing the same? Is the creation of this thread even justified in the first place?

Tomorrow you're going to open another thread asking 'Why do Igbo people speak Igbo?' Like seriously??
1000 likes kiss kiss kiss

172 Likes 7 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Nobody: 10:06am On Feb 21, 2015
bigfrancis21:


Do you mind telling us your experience?
My cousin dated this anambra Guy for 6 yrs,she dated d guy wen he had nothing,yet she was still with him only for this guy to get money he told my cousin dat "my mother said I shud marry from my tribe".meanwhile he claimed he loved her.y didn't he define d relationship from d onset instead of wasting her time. Come to think of it y will a Man not be able to make his own choice nd decisions for a life partner,I believe he knows nd understands her better than his mother does to know if she'll make a good life partner.it's high time grown up men not boys or babies speak for themselves.Any man who does this kind of thing will face God's punishment for life.

31 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by CHM11: 11:42am On Feb 21, 2015
sleekangel85:
My cousin dated this anambra Guy for 6 yrs,she dated d guy wen he had nothing,yet she was still with him only for this guy to get money he told my cousin dat "my mother said I shud marry from my tribe".meanwhile he claimed he loved her.y didn't he define d relationship from d onset instead of wasting her time. Come to think of it y will a Man not be able to make his own choice nd decisions for a life partner,I believe he knows nd understands her better than his mother does to know if she'll make a good life partner.it's high time grown up men not boys or babies speak for themselves.Any man who does this kind of thing will face God's punishment for life.
Don't blame the igbo guy dea friend, blame your cousin for dating an igbo guy for 6 bloody years!!!....she should have seen it coming, he is igbo for heavens sake!...

59 Likes

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by bigfrancis21: 6:16pm On Feb 21, 2015
sleekangel85:
My cousin dated this anambra Guy for 6 yrs,she dated d guy wen he had nothing,yet she was still with him only for this guy to get money he told my cousin dat "my mother said I shud marry from my tribe".meanwhile he claimed he loved her.y didn't he define d relationship from d onset instead of wasting her time. Come to think of it y will a Man not be able to make his own choice nd decisions for a life partner,I believe he knows nd understands her better than his mother does to know if she'll make a good life partner.it's high time grown up men not boys or babies speak for themselves.Any man who does this kind of thing will face God's punishment for life.

It is more of the fault of the guy rather than his tribe. If the guy really wants it to happen, it would happen. Except if your cousin isn't wife material enough (in terms of house management i.e. cooking very well not just cooking averagely, running house errands exceptionally well, e.t.c. which Igbo mothers emphasize greatly on) but excellent at being a caring and listening partner. If the guy wants to make it happen, believe me, he would make it happen. Not even his mother would stop him. You don't take a single person's issue and generalize it to everyone. My own very first cousin with same last name got married to a Yoruba Kogi lady in December last year. None of my family members objected to it. I mean, this is an individual thing. There are a couple of marriages between Igbo men and non-Igbo women. They happen steadily. Your story happens daily even between people of the same tribe! 2 people of the same tribe date for years only for one person to dump the other person. It shouldn't suddenly be an issue when the guy involved is 'Igbo'.

169 Likes 11 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by bigfrancis21: 6:19pm On Feb 21, 2015
sleekangel85:
If you check my thread,it's a question not an allegation all you needed to do was to give ur advice to d Lady.I know d Yorubas nd Hausas do dat but in dis case d guy is igbo.You Igbo guys aren't giving me answers dat I want instead u r paranoid.Abeg no be me start am oh.

There are several Igbo ladies that dated Yoruba guys only to get dumped by the guy for a fellow Yoruba lady. Such happen constantly. These ladies didn't cry foul, they moved on with life. One particular Igbo lady I know is in her 40s today and single because she was dating a Yoruba guy in her early 30s for 4 years who promised her marriage, she was happy that she was finally going to get married and her prayer to have a husband was finally answered, only for the guy's mother to reject her because she is Igbo and her son followed his mother's advice. At 36 she was single and dumped, older with fewer prospects of marriage. Now she's in her 40s and she still isn't married yet.

I don't condone tribalism, whatsoever. What happened between the Igbo guy and girl happens constantly within Igbos, Yorubas and Hausas. Some Igbo people date only to separate years after. Same for Hausas and Yorubas. It happens steadily. It isn't unique if that happens between people of different tribes. It all depends on the guy. If he really wants it to happen, it would happen, believe me.

Now, answer me honestly. Had this guy in question been a Yoruba guy, for example, about to dump the girl, say an Igbo girl, would you have opened this very thread in the first place questioning why Yorubas prefer to marry Yorubas?

142 Likes 11 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Nobody: 6:43pm On Feb 21, 2015
Op, you are a tribal bigot.
Lets re - phrase your question;
why should yorubas eat ewedu and amala?

sleekangel85:
If you check my thread,it's a question not an allegation all you needed to do was to give ur advice to d Lady.I know d Yorubas nd Hausas do dat but in dis case d guy is igbo.You Igbo guys aren't giving me answers dat I want instead u r paranoid.Abeg no be me start am oh.

73 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Nobody: 9:55pm On Feb 21, 2015
*sigh*

How many threads now on the issue of Igbos being too clannish when it comes to marriage?

Maybe I should also start a thread and talk about the two Yoruba girls I dated ( the first during my NYSC days in PH, the second while doing my Masters' in Birmingham) who both told me their fathers would kick me, an Omo Ibo,out of their houses if I dared to show up at their homes talking about marriage.

137 Likes 6 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Ishilove: 10:16pm On Feb 21, 2015
Radoillo:
*sigh*

How many threads now on the issue of Igbos being too clannish when it comes to marriage?

Maybe I should also start a thread and talk about the two Yoruba girls I dated ( the first during my NYSC days in PH, the second while doing my Masters' in Birmingham) who both told me their fathers would kick me, an Omo Ibo,out of their houses if I dared to show up at their homes talking about marriage.
grin grin

33 Likes

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Ishilove: 10:20pm On Feb 21, 2015
'Clannishness is not restricted to a single tribe. It's a general thing.

The issue is dating a person you have no interest in marrying. Why date someone you can't envision a future with? If you know your folks won't accept people from a certain tribe then why date such people?? It is the height of callousness. You waste their time, resources and emotions etc and still end up dumping them.

It's like dating a non-Christian when you know your folks will not accept a non-Christian. That's wickedness.

And don't give me that 'love is blind' crap. The love of nowadays is wearing long range field lens.

Tribalism is part and parcel of our human relations. It's called 'sub-conscious ethnic identification'. While I don't support it, let's make life less complicated for ourselves. If you know your folks will not accept someone from a certain tribe, then try as much as possible not to bring sorrow on yourself and others. Nip it at the bud.

If you can't help the love, if the love has consumed the both of you completely then elope. Or marry without your parents approval/blessings, though I wouldn't advice this (I will not be held responsible for whatever kasala you encounter when you elope. O.Y.O grin).

53 Likes 6 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Ishilove: 11:03pm On Feb 21, 2015
CHM11:


I've noticed that Nairalanders based in the USA can write long epistles, couldn't even finish my igbo brother's comment.
But I get his point.

This cracked my ribs... cheesy cheesy

11 Likes

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Guests: 3:00pm On Feb 22, 2015
So after all the bashing and bad talks about the igbos, you still want to marry them? shocked

41 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by tolexy007(m): 3:01pm On Feb 22, 2015
U are askin me now, bt who should I ask....

1 Like

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Viktor1983(m): 3:01pm On Feb 22, 2015
Its Not true . Its not an igbo thing ,its general.
Anyways Anambrarians are awesome people.
U gotta be awesome to keep em.

9 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by Kingspin(m): 3:02pm On Feb 22, 2015
My dear, i can marry anywhere just that Nigeria is not one.

5 Likes

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by obeteman1: 3:02pm On Feb 22, 2015
What's bad about that

2 Likes

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by ITbomb(m): 3:03pm On Feb 22, 2015
They understand themselves

One thing I have come to realise is that while most other tribes marry for love, Igbos marry mostly anyone who can take care of them and the love seems to grow after marriage. Apart from that, they are generally suspicious about other tribes, you can't say a word in another tongue that they won't ask 20 questions for explanation but they will flow in their tongue with their friends with no one raising an eyebrow.

Finally, to please their family especially Mumsy. Dare you marry a Yoruba woman when Mama had told you last Christmas to come home and marry, you go hear am

24 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Why Do Igbos Especially The Anambrans Marry From Their Tribe? by onyedikachukwue(m): 3:03pm On Feb 22, 2015
Our women feel more comfortable with us.i can't marry a girl who is not from anambra.


Proudly ANAMBRA
I REP NNEWI

56 Likes 4 Shares

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) ... (25) (Reply)

Ooni Of Ife Ogunwusi Catwalks At Fashion Show In Lagos (photos) / Meet Ooni Of Ife’s Sisters Who Ensured The Emergence Of A New Queen / Shock As Men Steal Meat From Lions

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2020 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 266
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.