Justfollowit:


Amen, I pray you....

I can't see any course for prayer in my post. You don't expect me to father another man's child(ren), do you? Or have you seen a man given a brand new and fairly used model of a car to choose from and goes for the later? But I may consider her if she can take good care of me, that is, pay my bills.

Godmother:


Fixed

That's subjective na

Hehehe

Meanwhile 'after one' is better than 'after nothing', at least it shows their fertility and that their reproductive organs have not been bastardized with postinors and all whatnot , as a man how are you sure that lady who's not a virgin has not committed abortions and thereby tamper with natural womb settings?

godoluwa:
hmmm. lmao

Of course their is no law that says i cant marry any woman i want... and i dont think having kids disqualifies any woman from getting married ...Am ok with any woman i fall for.

because after child birth their pussy go dey like borehole

Before i take on some people here, i will like to say dis.... It is not d sweetness of sex u are having in hiding dat matters here but d consequence of dat act. I will boldly tell u many unwedded ladies were deceived into having sex on d promises of marriage and brighter things. But d painful thing were dese girls failed, d allowed d sweetness of d sex to becloud deir thinking of not getting weded before d act

I believe itsperceived hard for single mums to hook up because of the notion attached to it. Most people just believe that once a lady has a child out of wedlock it means she has at one time or the other being promiscuous. Nobody wants to understand that she could easily have gotten rid of the pregnancy but chose not to maybe cos of her beliefs or strong principles.

Anyways, I personally don't think they find it hard to get married. A few men would even like a woman like that cos they feel it means she's fertile. Other men who have been married before and already have kids would rush such women cos they might not want any more kids and know the lady might not be gunning for any either.

jaybee3:

So single guys plenty?

We are not talking about NYSC dudes and Jambites shey you know

Tell her she doesn't understand

Wedon:


We are talking of the woman with an 8YO child and you said she wasn't 'fresh' anymore.

But I bet she would have been fresh if she had an abortion 8 years ago?

Hhmmmmm

Isn't it even more risky to marry a well packaged fraud (I'm sure it ain't hard to identify them in our midst)

#Just saying!

johnydon22:
Of course their is law that says i cant marry any woman i want... and i dont think having kids disqualifies any woman from getting married ...Am ok with any woman i fall for.

wishing u d best

Misogynist2014:
I can't see any course for prayer in my post. You don't expect me to father another man's child(ren), do you? Or have you seen a man given a brand new and fairly used model of a car to choose from and goes for the later? But I may consider her if she can take good care of me, that is, pay my bills.

You see how you keep fooling yourself, you can only marry a single woman if she could pay your bills. How many times have I told you to stop calling yourself a man. You are a boy-man not a man. It is high time you start identifying with that.

Sorry to disappoint you most men would choose a used Lamborghini over a new range rover

Fairgodwin:
I am really interested in this topic. Because I have often wonder why as well.
It isn't so much of a big deal for guys who already have kid(s) to get hook up and or be married but so much of a big deal for the ladies. Why is it so? Why is the society so unfair to women?
And in some cases, it wasn't a fault of these ladies as some of them might have been victims of rape which ultimately resulted in the pregnancies, and of course, abortion was never an option (for them). Yet we fail to see reasons and embrace them as well as give them a second chance just the way we do the guys.
Like the poster below just said, maybe they truly don't want extra liability. But what about the lady who would have to take care or start looking after the guy's child from his ex? Isn't that some form of "extra liability" on the part of the guy as well?
And even in some, if not most cases, the lady wouldn't bring the child into their 'new home' so as not to put "extra liability" on the guy, yet most guys would still not want such (single mothers) women.
So what do we call this? Hypocrisy or simply Insensitivity?

Ain't you a guy? Why not marry one and advise your friends, relatives etc to do same. In fact, your dad can get another wife and do the same. Do as you preach, lead by example

jaybee3:

That's subjective na

Hehehe

All join biko

It's pretty difficult to cope with the challenges/complications of being entangled with a single mom. The majority of them carry a baggage of grudge from their failed relationships that they may never wholeheartedly commit. Always on the lookout for bad behavior to justify their non-commital; mostly unforgiving cos of their pasts as well. Very sensitive to the treatment of their extra baggage thus requiring a nerve wracking diplomacy to deal with. Honestly, people still love them, but it would require more than that to be responsible for the total welbeing of a child/children, who would go back to their dads; whom would be required to a handled with much sensitivity and diplomacy while being alienated by, maybe, friends and family. ...and if a single girl is available, why go through the stress?

Jusome:
supose the young girl...aborted the baby and appear single....how wil u know...the fact she save the baby shows she values life....once you love the woman wht big deal does it make to marry her....mariage is all about Gods blessing there are 1million single dat has had sex and abortion and stil clame single and decent marrying............there is aways two side of a coin at list d fact she has a baby shows she.can give birth than marry a baren woman who has removed her womb during process of abortion

and what make u believed that she didn't try to abort the baby but failed. Or what makes U believed that it is not the fear of losing her life that make her not to rather than the will to keep the pregnancy.
Yes! Love is important. But that's if U love her b4 getting to know she already have an issue. The fact that she failed to tell me in the first instance is enough reason to backout because I will be wondering what else is she still keeping away from me. I can't speak for others, but as for me I can't toll that line again. Never!
Because I av seen lots of people who tried abortion yet the pregnancy continue to boom

Wedon:
I think Nigerian men are just hypocrites.

I used to be friends with a man who hated abortion like hell. He would call abortionists murderers and claim they carry badluck wherever they go.

Then his friend married a woman with an 8-yr old baby (victim of teenage pregnancy) and he was one of the people who made mockery of him and called him 'f00lish'.

So I asked him, which is better, having and abortion or having a child outside wedluck. Cos the truth is that any woman who has engaged in pre-marital sex is exposed to pregnancy, even when you use contraceptive. Condoms have been known to fail in some situations. Some withdrawl methods have failed even morning after pills still fail.

So this friend of mine, sleeps with women and probably have dodged a bullet or two in getting them pregnant, and yet think he has the right to judge single mothers and deride abortionsts

We women, we NEVER catch a break with Nigerian men!!!

Are you a man.?

Justfollowit:


You see how you keep fooling yourself, you can only marry a single woman if she could pay your bills. How many times have I told you to stop calling yourself a man. You are a boy-man not a man. It is high time you start identify with that.

Sorry to disappoint you most men would choose a used Lamborghini over a new range rover

odiegwu. lmao

[quote author=Dyt post=32715045][/quote]

Thinking this postal, Wahala dey o, but you know that even you won't want or tolerate another sharing your man....talk less of her being the majority shareholder.
No wonder that there are men poachers in town yet women still blame married men for having flings...ewoooo!

steppin:

Looks like you're a single mother.
Congrats!

KillerBeauty:
Getting married as a single mother is challenging because.....
















I seriously don't know what to say
Sorry op

honestly there are no words...... i just tire sef

Justfollowit:


You see how you keep fooling yourself, you can only marry a single woman if she could pay your bills. How many times have I told you to stop calling yourself a man. You are a boy-man not a man. It is high time you start identifying with that.

Sorry to disappoint you most men would choose a used Lamborghini over a new range rover

Hope you read where I wrote 'same model'. You think its bad spending a woman's money? I think its cool.

DeRay98:


Thinking this postal, Wahala dey o, but you know that even you won't want or tolerate another sharing your man....talk less of her being the majority shareholder.
No wonder that there are men poachers in town yet women still blame married men for having flings...ewoooo!

English pls

it depends on an individual but for me as single minded one, i real dn't care so far she is a good type,...

redcliff:


Irs people like you who dont have an iota of idea or experience would open their mouths and say anything they want. Anyway, its within your data plan. You cant exceed it.

We have a talk when you grow up

lockupman:

Its only a man with self-esteem issues that would beg to marry a second-hand babe. As what na? Abeg speak for yourself and the beggarly guys who beg to marry you. And before you brag, check very well, 90 percent of those men just want to fiork and you know men can go any length and promise anything to see and enter 'Aso rock'.
.

You haven't finished growing

veraponpo:


You talked as if you are from another country. In Nigeria of today, marriage is more difficult for a single mum than for a spinster. It is a reality that we cannot run away from.

It is a thing to have men around you but it is another thing for them to be ready for marriage.

I understand your points , however, OP's points are real too , very real.

No
I have seen it
Witnessed it
People I know and around me don't discriminate

Nursy:
Cos the men don't want extra liability

correct. Dats one very good point.
2. It will be funny to bring a girl with a kid to ur family and announce to dem u want to get weded except ur have urs already. AMANDIOHA.
3. U may have problem dealing with dat child once she/he grows up in d near future because he/she is not ur biological child.
4. Dis one is very deadly. Some women are not loyal at all. It is just like d case of a girl who will never forget d guy dat disvirgin her. Women are too emotional, d guy dat dump dem before dey find comfort in u can appear one day. Before u say Jesus, u will find her all over him and she is gone with d guy and d child. Dis one in particular, i fear women.

egbedore:
No one is perfect and we all make mistakes at one time or the other. And as the adage says "To sin is human,but to forgive is divine"

But I have noticed that it is always difficult for ladies that have issues out of wedlock to get a man that will love and marry them. After all,having a child isn't a disease.

Why is this so?

its not difficult but they make it difficult.

there is always a balanced form of affairs which many people overlook.

An unmarried single mother will best be appreciated nd loved ny an unmarried single guy

A divorced lady will mostly be appreciated by a widower or married man and ofcourse a divorced guy with children.

but when an unmarried single mother starts eyeing single guys that hve no child out of wedlock then she will most likely find it difficult.

cKaiser:


Moreover single girls are in excess demand, why would one need to go for an after 1?

uncle na excess supply dem dey. ooo

driand:
and why are you still single?

You should rather ask why I am taken

egbedore:
No one is perfect and we all make mistakes at one time or the other. And as the adage says "To sin is human,but to forgive is divine"

But I have noticed that it is always difficult for ladies that have issues out of wedlock to get a man that will love and marry them. After all,having a child isn't a disease.

Why is this so?

....
The major issue is based on trust. Most of these Ladies tell series of lies why they are single mothers.