cyprus000:
me too,I don't lyk dating nigerian women ethier

THE FEELING IS MUTUAL SWEERY

EfemenaXY:


It's a good thing she knows exactly what she wants but at 33 she's not a child and shouldn't be hung up on Nigerian men. Our men are what they are and no tribe/race is perfect. Sure our men have their imperfections, but who doesn't?

She can go marry a Black American if she likes. Why is she so hung up on our men? Na by force to marry? If she's meeting the wrong type, then she should either expand her dating pool (like she knows she should), or she should take a deeper look within herself to find out what sort of person she portrays herself as or the message she gives off about her person

She says she's not trying to bash our men but her video isn't far off from it. Let her find who'll make her happy and quit with the slagging off.

Her comment annoys me jor.

CC: Chillisauce. Smartmom. Bukytayne. Ifyalways. Edwife.

edwife:


She should go and shove it already.Isn't it her mates and younger ones getting married every weekend to Nigerian Men?

She is what she attracts.

babyosisi:

But everything she says is true sha
Our men are tough
Only our women can handle them as they are
Go and see naija men married to AA or Oyibo,they do what you could never believe our men are capable of
They will be cooking and cleaning and baking without complaining
Yes honey
Yes sweetie
Running around serving guests
We went to visit one and he was baking
An Igbo man o,wearing apron and baking and serving guests
Had his wife been nigerian that will never happen
He will sit and be cracking jokes while his wife is cooking and serving
For them to marry Americans they make major adjustments which many of our men are not willing to make
This girl is very correct in her observation

EfemenaXY:


Thank you!



That isn't entirely true.

It's unfair to categorize our men like that. Even my late father-in-law (God rest his soul) was an excellent cook and entertainer. Hubby cooks. My dad cooked. My youngest brother cooks so well, he's almost putting his sisters to "shame". Hubby cooks. All my boys cook and are well brought up (as per knowing how to treat a woman).

Let's be honest here. We are what we attract. She should go search herself.

EfemenaXY:


Thank you!



That isn't entirely true.

It's unfair to categorize our men like that. Even my late father-in-law (God rest his soul) was an excellent cook and entertainer. Hubby cooks. My dad cooked. My youngest brother cooks so well, he's almost putting his sisters to "shame". Hubby cooks. All my boys cook and are well brought up (as per knowing how to treat a woman).

Let's be honest here. We are what we attract. She should go search herself.

babyosisi:


But everything she says is true sha
Our men are tough
Only our women can handle them as they are
Go and see naija men married to AA or Oyibo,they do what you could never believe our men are capable of
They will be cooking and cleaning and baking without complaining
Yes honey
Yes sweetie
Running around serving guests

We went to visit one and he was baking
An Igbo man o,wearing apron and baking and serving guests
Had his wife been nigerian that will never happen
He will sit and be cracking jokes while his wife is cooking and serving

For them to marry Americans they make major adjustments which many of our men are not willing to make

This girl is very correct in her observation

Notyourb1tch:
I don't believe that BS you are what you attract. If that was true, all good peeps would be together and all bad peeps will be together.Those men who cheat on their wifes. Did they ask their men to cheat on them? So they are what they attract yet they have not been cheating on their husbands.

Notyourb1tch:
I don't think she is hung up on Nigerian men. I think she is actually quite open to dating others. She clearly states in the video that it is about her personal experience with the Nigerian men she has interacted with. Truth be told her height and age is not helping matters.

 It can be hard trying to relate to a culture when you yourself are a product of other influences. As a 1st generation, I can relate to her wanting to date her culture but there being room for her to add other influences. Maybe she went wrong when she generalized, but there was a lot of truth in what she said. She didn't lie about the bending and the twisting that some women do just to get married either and how you are considered old after you pass 30

EfemenaXY:


Quit with the swearing pls. It's not necessary and I don't like it.

Yes, I stand by what I posted about being you are what you attract. The whole purpose of dating is to see if you're a compatible match. Fine, she hasn't met her match so far from her limited pool of Nigerian men, but does that give her the right to generalize? Would she happily classify her father and other menfolk in her family in the same way she's downgraded majority of our men?

She in an environment where it's no big deal NOT TO GET MARRIED. So why is she going on and on and on about it? Why is she allowing her self to be hooked up with Nigerian men by her multitude of aunts / relatives. There's plenty of fish in the ocean. Let her look elsewhere na. Just because she's born of Nigerian parents doesn't mean she's got to get hitched to a Nigerian man.

She says one thing but means something else.

EfemenaXY:


I am a first generation Nigerian married to a first generation Nigerian man too. So is Babyosisi. And many others I'm sure.

Re: the bolded, then why bother at all. Since her experience has been a nightmare so far, it begs the question as to why she keeps going back for more.

EfemenaXY:


I am a first generation Nigerian married to a first generation Nigerian man too. So is Babyosisi. And many others I'm sure.

Re: the bolded, then why bother at all. Since her experience has been a nightmare so far, it begs the question as to why she keeps going back for more.

babyosisi:
Let them take their American wife to a party
Na dem go take off her coat
Na so so are you ok dear?
Are you alright honey?
If na naija wife,for where
Ad when the woman says she is not ok,he gets up and they leave
If na naija wife ,who born you
You leave when he decides it is time to leave

babyosisi:


No we are not

First generation nigerian Americans are our children
We are immigrants

Believe me sis very first nigerian American girl I have come across says the same exact things this girl is saying

Notyourb1tch:
Lol because I said BS you are having a hissy fit about it? Like I said before, there is no such thing as you are what you attract otherwise why do some good people end up with bad people? Let's just agree to disagree okay

EfemenaXY:




You'll be surprised what the lure of papers can do. If they're sooooo lovey dovey as you say, then why do many of them drop these women like hot cakes the minute they've solidified their stay in Obodo oyinbo and always go back home to get married to the real deal?

Yes, most of these men turned into boy-boy houseboys will continue to swallow the shyte thrown at them till they get what they want.

Let her go marry an AA man na. They'll show her pepper. At the very least, our men have strong cultural value and will not abandon their wives and kids. Their full blooded Nigerian wives and kids.

It's a give and take situation.

babyosisi:


No we are not

First generation nigerian Americans are our children
We are immigrants

Believe me sis every first generation nigerian American girl I have come across says the same exact things this girl is saying
Their parents would want them to marry a nigerian
And they don't want a man that is dug in his ways like their father
They want a man like the boys and young men they have interacted with

babyosisi:


I am not talking of paper wives
I am talking about marriages that have lasted a decade plus
They are so polite and good mannered
A naija that has been trained by Oyibo wife will make a good husband wallahi
Hopefully he won't fall to his old ways

EfemenaXY:


Such a man will never be happy and is just a tightly wound coil waiting to snap. A leopard can never change ALL of it's spots. What you've described is a completely watered down man with no manhood, no pride.

Tell me something then sis...do such men, when they visit Naija with their Oyinbo wives and kids do all of what you've described? i.e: opening doors. Hanging her coat. Rubbing her hands so the hammattern doesn't bite her frail fingers. Polishes her shoes. Calls her "darling" even when they're having an argument. Cleans up after her. And so on and so forth?

blackpanther25:
This bish is using Nigerian men as a scape goat cause she's 6'3' ...she needs to blame her giant gene parents.

blackpanther25:
This is a Gross generalisation and I don't think you are in a position to talk for the full Nigerian male population. There are lots of Nigerian men happily married to non Nigerian women (not just whites but other Africans, AA, etc etc). Just because some men date Non-Nigerian women does not mean they have no pride and no manhood. Everyone has preferences and to be honest Nigerian Women can be something else. All am saying is stop speaking for us. Thanks

TheSonOfMark:


She probably seeks effeminate men whom she'd have wrapped around her little finger By the time she's 40 she'll beg to be with us. ASK BIMBO AKINTOLA AND HALLE BERRY.
WE NIGERIAN MEN DON'T TAKE POO.

babyosisi:


But everything she says is true sha
Our men are tough
Only our women can handle them as they are
Go and see naija men married to AA or Oyibo,they do what you could never believe our men are capable of
They will be cooking and cleaning and baking without complaining
Yes honey
Yes sweetie
Running around serving guests

We went to visit one and he was baking
An Igbo man o,wearing apron and baking and serving guests
Had his wife been nigerian that will never happen
He will sit and be cracking jokes while his wife is cooking and serving

For them to marry Americans they make major adjustments which many of our men are not willing to make

This girl is very correct in her observation

babyosisi:
Let them take their American wife to a party
Na dem go take off her coat
Na so so "are you ok dear?"
"Are you alright honey?"
" everything alright love"?
If na naija wife,for where,na who go ask you?
And when the woman says she is not ok,he gets up and they leave,party's over
If na naija wife ,who born you
You leave when he decides it is time to leave
Our culture can be very crude wallahi
That is the problem Americans have with African men

T3Amo:
Part 2

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6fo4EUM_0J4

I feel this was better conveyed and I get a clearer vision of what she's saying. This was a powerful video. She's very brave for putting herself out there

Subom1:
She was like talking to me through the spirit man. I swear when she was talking that I was totally finishing her sentences. I agree with a lot of what she was saying. About the roles and the power dynamics of being in a marriage or a relationship with a full out 100% nigerian man and not wanting to conform in order to make it work. Before I met my man, I said the same thing. I would only date a 1st generation naija boy, because he'd have the swag I like and we would have similar experiences culturally yet it wouldn't be sooo strict and staunch in the experience. Like we could order out and he wouldn't be expecting jollof rice and egusi soup like everyday LOL



She also mentioned the older women or men who rag on you because you're not in your early twenties and still have not found a partner. My grandma told my mother at 30 that she was too old to marry again. I was in total disbelief. And she ragged on me for not having a husband and no children, that she was old when she got married at 22. In my head I was thinking," what am I? a dinosaur fossil in comparison?"

They'd even bring these suitors to visit, who were annoying and yes arrogant as hell. I was like," why you tryna push this dude up on me?" Completely clueless. then I saw him at a mall a year later and he was like," I got married." and gave me the "oh you missed out glance". In my head I was thinking,"boo, I wasn't even checkin for you. "

Xiadnat:
I hear you on age, height and so called strong personality.

*sighs*. I date all kinds of men.

I consider myself to have a strong personality, but I think you just need to have proper balance.

There is a proper time for everything; time to be strong and time to be weak. Time to lead, time to follow. Time to be smart and time to be dumb. Time to speak up, time to shut up. Time to laugh, time to cry. Time to work, time to have fun. Time to wear pants, time to wear skirt. Get the point?

Extreme of anything is not good-for most of life's issues. IMHO