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Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? - Family - Nairaland

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Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by landwin: 11:27pm On Feb 15, 2009
I know a deaconess in my church, she starves her househelp.In the morning her househelp goes around begging people for money to feed,her househelp sleeps under the staircase,she doesn't allow her househelp sleep with her children.She doesn't pay her househelp's school fees.Whenever her children goes back to school,she would tell her househelp to sleep on the floor of her children's bedroom and warn her not to lie on the bed.Her househelp goes around with a torn school uniform.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by SeanT21(f): 2:43am On Feb 16, 2009
When me and my brothers where younger,My mother bought in 2 househelps.They where well fed like us.She sent them to school and bought them clothes and whatever they needed.She never looked down on them.

Househelps are human too!! wink
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by sugabelle: 8:35am On Feb 16, 2009
U should ask yourself, what would u do in such a situation? If u had a housegirl, would u treat her well? As for me, I will always show respect to other people's children bc I fear God! And I don't really think I'd like to keep a maid, no way.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by tpia: 8:36am On Feb 16, 2009
.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by Omolola1(f): 10:55am On Feb 16, 2009
because dem be aje butter grin
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by smurf1(f): 5:50pm On Feb 16, 2009
Omolola1:

because dem be aje butter grin
lipsrsealed
TOPIC

The feel like they have total dominion over them which is absolutely false, cry cry
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by Outstrip(f): 5:52pm On Feb 16, 2009
If that woman was a deaconess in my church I will definitely say something to my pastor and f they let her be a deaconess inspite of her wickedness I wll leave that church. You have nothng to teach me when you let your ordained ministers wreck such havoc on people. Bunch of hypocrites.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by dani1luv: 7:53pm On Feb 16, 2009
hmmmmmmmn
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by Ndipe(m): 1:49am On Feb 17, 2009
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by Nobody: 8:56am On Feb 17, 2009
If there is a NAPTIP office around you, go and report her case. Its your responsibilty too since you know.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by demystify(f): 10:41am On Feb 17, 2009
People that treat their househelps badly want them to feel inferior, less human and under privileged.
They want them to see them as their bosses, Oga, God, saviour, breath giver and all that sh!t.

Househelps are human beings too, some are far nicer/prettier/beautiful than us. . . showing them love doesn't hurt.
It's very bad, may their conscience take them to court. grin
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by Okijajuju1(m): 11:19am On Feb 17, 2009
Why do most bosses maltreat their employees??

undecided undecided

ANSWER: Cos they are the boss.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by MrCrackles(m): 11:24am On Feb 17, 2009
Topic

The trend is sort of standard and i dont agree with it one bit

Some househelps deserve to be treated like shit but at the end of the day, it is not the right thing to do!
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by demystify(f): 11:49am On Feb 17, 2009
MrCrackles:

Topic

The trend is sort of standard and i dont agree with it one bit

Some househelps deserve to be treated like shit but at the end of the day, it is not the right thing to do!

I think it's better to sack them if they can't be tolerated, instead of being a tyrant/treating them like shit,
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by Okijajuju1(m): 11:49am On Feb 17, 2009
@ Crackles

How/when does anyone deserve to be maltreated??
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by MrCrackles(m): 11:53am On Feb 17, 2009
demystify:

I think it's better to sack them if they can't be tolerated, instead of being a tyrant/treating them like shit,

Best solution rather than resorting to maltreatment which will eventually lead to them getting sent away!
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by MrCrackles(m): 11:56am On Feb 17, 2009
Okija_juju:

@ Crackles

How/when does anyone deserve to be maltreated??


Trust me, there are times when i have seen househelps go right bang out of order and deserve a burning slap!

But at the end of the day, it will prolly amount to maltreatment

I remember growing up in Naija, we had a bit of a slowpoke as an househelp

If you tell her something now, she forgets almost immediately and that can be annoying, thus warranting some beatings

People can do things that make you want to beat the Satan out of them but patient people will calm down

I am not talking about when househelps get treated like trash just because they are HOUSEHELPS
! grin
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by Okijajuju1(m): 12:04pm On Feb 17, 2009
MrCrackles:


Trust me, there are times when i have seen househelps go right bang out of order and deserve a burning slap!

But at the end of the day, it will prolly amount to maltreatment

I remember growing up in Naija, we had a bit of a slowpoke as an househelp

If you tell her something now, she forgets almost immediately and that can be annoying, thus warranting some beatings

People can do things that make you want to beat the Satan out of them but patient people will calm down

I am not talking about when househelps get treated like trash just because they are HOUSEHELPS
! grin

I agree with you.

We also had a series of dumb househelps one time. I remember one who gave my little sisters garri to drink because she was too lazy to warm the soup in the fridge.

But I still dont endorse hitting/torturing another persons kid.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by demystify(f): 12:44pm On Feb 17, 2009
I agree with u guys to some extents.
Some househelps are dumbos, 1yr old child may behave wisely than some of them.
Some of their behaviour may tempt u to even call them witches. . . how wld u treat a female househelp that abuses your 8yr old boy sexually? it's a horible thing to behold!

Some madams/Ogas are simply cruel to them without cause and it's simply unjust.

Sack them if you can't cope before u become the bad one in the picture.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by Afribiz(f): 2:26pm On Feb 17, 2009
I think the question here should be :Why do most househelps maltreat their boss.
I've seen many cases of househelps being unduly/unnecessarily wicked, doing so many unimaginable and absurd things in and out of the house. Tell me, how do you want the madam to treat such a househelp?

Most of them are too greedy that they'll go about begging for food, even after eating at home, telling everyone that cares to listen that they've not had any food to eat since yesterday.

I always advise women close to me to send such househelps back home cuz people will only see the maltreatment, and won't believe the level of atrocity being committed by the househelp.

I don't have any househelp for now, and i pray to get a good one when I'm ready. God help us.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by spoilt(f): 5:32pm On Feb 17, 2009
Why would anyone maltreat anybody else be it a house help or otherwise?
I've never ascribed to beatings.What does it solve? I was always the one who would throw myself between mad-as-hell aunties and their housemaids who were about to get a whooping. grin
When a non privileged family gives you their child you should remember that you are that child's guardian and should treat that child like your own. The child shouldn't be first to wake up and last to go to bed. Feeding them scraps and burnt food is also unacceptable. taking them out to the fast food joint to stare while your kids dig into yummy snacks is also bad. Clothing them in rags and letting them sleep on the hard cold floor when there are spare beds all over the place is unkind. The thing about life is that no one knows tomorrow. Tomorrow always comes with its surprises and payback.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by Ndipe(m): 7:55pm On Feb 17, 2009
For the fellow who called their housemaid a 'slowpoke', why didnt you simply send her home? At first, I was way too ignorant to realize that housemaid in Nigeria is slavery, until I moved to the USA and thought about it. Look at it this way. You are an employee, you work for your boss for 40 hours a week, and get paid at the end of the week with 2 days off. But a maid back home works seven days a week for peanuts. That is unacceptable and a gross service of injustice. Tell me, who would willingly accept that? If I am to move back home, believe me, this is something that I would want the government to tackle from the roots. I blame poverty and ignorance, just yesterday, I was reading an old edition of Tell Magazine. On the cover was a picture(s?) of little kids hawking their goods on the streets, and I did point that out earlier that it's child abuse.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by tpia: 7:59pm On Feb 17, 2009
I have to agree househelps are a form of slavery.

and why wont they misbehave when they're not happy and dont see any good prospects for their future. Not to mention the way they're constantly reminded of their second class status in society. Always the outsider looking in on the "superior" family.

Many of them are branded as witches- but do you know what kind of abuse they went through before being brought over as househelps. Or while they were househelps. Things they must have experienced but couldnt tell anyone.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by Ndipe(m): 8:02pm On Feb 17, 2009
But honestly, there are stories of maids who are witches and wreaked havoc in the family of their oga. That one no be lie.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by tpia: 8:07pm On Feb 17, 2009
Ndipe:

But honestly, there are stories of maids who are witches and wreaked havoc in the family of their oga. That one no be lie.

"Witch" can be a relative term which depends on a fair amount of credulousness for validity.

Child abuse can turn a victim into what a society can choose to call witchcraft.

Some slaves in the Americas attempted to poison their white masters. Some were successful while others werent. All could be termed witches since they were using unseen ways of getting revenge.

what about men who sleep with the housemaids? Whats your take on that kind of sexual harrassment which goes unpunished, and even if discovered, the victim still gets blamed?
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by spoilt(f): 9:26pm On Feb 17, 2009
Every other person in naija is accused of being a witch. grin

Nigerians are witchcraft sensitive.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by Fhemmmy: 5:58pm On Feb 19, 2009
Cos they wanna put some fear in them to make sure they dont go near Oga.
Also, the fear of Oga maddam, is the beginning of wisdom
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by RichyBlacK(m): 6:56pm On Feb 19, 2009
landwin:
I know a deaconess in my church, she starves her househelp.In the morning her househelp goes around begging people for money to feed,her househelp sleeps under the staircase,she doesn't allow her househelp sleep with her children.She doesn't pay her househelp's school fees.Whenever her children goes back to school,she would tell her househelp to sleep on the floor of her children's bedroom and warn her not to lie on the bed.Her househelp goes around with a torn school uniform.

LOL at deaconess! All those hypocrites that use church to shield their wickedness. Hissssss. They will stand and preach but they will never do what they tell others to do.

Nigeria is filled with too many of these folks who just go to church/mosque but learn absolutely nothing from it. They collect bribes, behead children for juju, torture their house helps, murder "infidels", burn down worship centers, rob the poor, rape their daughters, kill their relatives for juju money and shout "Hallelujah!". May God punish them all!

Thank God Fela exposed these zombies before he died. I miss Fela.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by RichyBlacK(m): 6:57pm On Feb 19, 2009
tpia:

"Witch" can be a relative term which depends on a fair amount of credulousness for validity.

Child abuse can turn a victim into what a society can choose to call witchcraft.

Some slaves in the Americas attempted to poison their white masters. Some were successful while others werent. All could be termed witches since they were using unseen ways of getting revenge.

what about men who sleep with the housemaids? Whats your take on that kind of sexual harrassment which goes unpunished, and even if discovered, the victim still gets blamed?

Correct yarn!
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by RichyBlacK(m): 7:05pm On Feb 19, 2009
Ndipe:

But honestly, there are stories of maids who are witches and wreaked havoc in the family of their oga. That one no be lie.

Chei. You still believe in witches? That they'll kill you at night? I have a friend who is a witch and have met two of her other friends who are witches. They can't do anything to me. They just read books and learn spells. They also study palmistry and numerology. These are just pseudosciences, progenitors of today's "science".

Stop being afraid of witches! How will you feel if people start being afraid of "students"? Witches are merely students and practitioners of an older, cruder form of science.

If you shoot a witch in the head, no spell, no magic, no juju, and no Satan will prevent her body's biology and chemistry from respecting the physics guiding the hollow point smashing its way through her cranium. Old science respects new science. grin
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by Hauwa1: 7:50pm On Feb 19, 2009
Ndipe i agree with you. house help should be abolish. if you want someone to take care of your chores and home, get a grown up.

those family who use little children as househelp should be hanged!

they think they are rich! if they are that rich and want to show off their wealth, why not get a mature person to do the work? yeye pple with spoilt children.
Re: Why Do Most Women Maltreat Their Househelps? by Fhemmmy: 8:13pm On Feb 19, 2009
*Hauwa*:

Ndipe i agree with you. house help should be abolish. if you want someone to take care of your chores and home, get a grown up.

those family who use little children as househelp should be hanged!

they think they are rich! if they are that rich and want to show off their wealth, why not get a mature person to do the work? yeye pple with spoilt children.

Haba, you dey vex?
Most of the time, some househelps are even distant member of the family that has a father that is poor to take care of her or him, and cos the lil lad is living with the Uncle or the Aunt, the made the poor lad do all the work and become a househelp, and yet wit no pay, but cos they give them some lil food.
i think a nanny should be encouraged and with the description of duty, add house works

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