PDF:


I wonder how some of u read sef. Must a guy have slept with u alrdy b4 u know wut he's up to?? As I can recall, wut d op said is: they all just want her 'sweet body', not that they leave after enjoying her 'sweet body'.

No be by force to comment na...

So, did you schedule the date or skipped it?

sonofananimal:



I DON'T GIVE PEOPLE LIKE, BUT I JUST HAVE TO GIVE YOU ONE

hahahah,yes sir & tx

Tallesty1:
She can motivate him to hustle more.


My ex did and I still respect her for it.


The girl is gotta put in some effort y'know, nothing good comes easy

Why is she an ex

femi4:
You are right.
A successful man attracts girls while a successful woman repels guys enemies of progress

There, amended

bukatyne:


Why is she an ex

In her house.

Tallesty1:
In her house.

Married someone else?

bukatyne:


There, amended

Please remove that food from your dp, I dey fast

bukatyne:


Married someone else?

About To.............................

Well my observation...

The op is not ready for marriage,she may be 29 but not yet mature,marriage is for mature people..if u go into marriage immature u end up fustrated....
Most Girls think"Tall Dark And Handsome + Cash"..Very Immature for marriage..
Few think "CHARACTER as a Priority"...Very mature for marriage..
When d op gets older she'l understand dat character sustains a marriage not physical attraction...
I'm Married to someone who has Character,d cash is not flowing like a river but we experience Peace like a River..and im so happy becos I neva chose d alredy made guys but Chose Character..
So op please let dat guy go...after letting him go..sit back and adjust,Then Choose CHARACTER..

Tallesty1:
Like seriously, who is the right man?

I personally don't subscribe to the shitty idea that there exists one particular person that's meant for you...........

I also do not believe in the idea of a wrong person loving you right.

If he dresses like a gay, hangs out with gays and walks like a gay then he's definitely a gay.

If he loves you right then he's the right person. There is no two way about it.

The op thinks he's the wrong person because he isn't rich and handsome.

Is alright.


God is watching.

1000likes for you

Excuse me but I hv to say this... I'm a female...i wasn't pretty but I worked on myself and now people rave about how beautiful I've become....i held on to a job most men would reject... So I could not b a liability to my husband in future.. I learnt to dress well and comport myself wit decorum.now guys walk up to me... Why would I just accept anybody without having my standards... D world is such a superficial place.... Men judge based on wot they see... A beautiful sufficient woman they want... But they wont accept u as ugly or struggling.. But u guys want us to accept u and manage u as poor ignorant and broke ass.its sad really...

I have to say this to d ladies ..work on perfecting ur self.then value urself cos most men wont know what u went thru to get to where u are.set ur standards on men.. Be realistic so u don't end up dissapointed.truth Is guys hv their standard and specs for wifey...she must b tall slim busty.... With big nyash...etc but they don't accept d fact that they hv badly groomed mad man hair body odor or disgusting tatooes.anoda persons faults are easy to criticize.you must hold them to ur standard.

I for one would never chose to settle for someone who doesn't hv a life plan written with plan b.or a man who wants me cos I'm financially successful.. But cannot boast of savings.or someone who doesn't keep his word.or someone who is incapable of setting goals for success....so know which traits to look for in apartner.its not about him earning 50k... Its wot he does wit d 50k I'd like to know.so when 100k comes in sure he will do fine.

irishCream:
Dear Family I'm in deep shiiit, so confused on what to do right now.

I just turned 29 few days ago and have been out of a serious relationship for over a year now.

Have been waiting patiently for that right man to come along but unfortunately it only the wrong ones that keep coming my way, they just want to have a feel of my sweet body and off they go, no genuine intentions.

Now there's a brother that have been friendzoning for over two years now yet he keep persisting, good a thing I'm not the type that pretends so I told him from day one he asked me out that I'm not interested in him except on friendship level, I told him I don't feel him emotionally but he keep hanging on hoping I change my mind with time, my reasons for rejecting him is cos to me he's not presentable enough and I can't be proud introducing him to my people and again he got no good paid job (why on earth must he be poor and ugly at the same time, what kind of torture is that ). He's just managing in a private firm that pays less than 50k.

But what makes me have a rethink is the character of this my friendzoned brother, he keeps in touch despite my rejecting him, he even offer little financial assistance when I'm in need, when I asked him why he's doing all these to a girl that openly reject him he claims he has faith that I'll consider him one day, sometimes I'm forced to suspect if he has cast a spell on me so another good man won't come my way.

Now he has called to schedule a date tomorrow and I know as usual he wants to remind me that the year is running that I should consider his request since he hope to settle down this year.

Please dear Family advice me accordingly is it advisable I say yes to a man I don't feel a thing for emotionally? Can I ever get to love him? I do hear love grows but I don't believe in such!!!

Dear miss agbani Derego, u started ur piece by eulogizing ursef and casting d guy. wat if am d guy and I jus read ur piece. I will kip close marking u until u yield then I will smoosh u wella from behind at least ten times, then I will friendzone u, so u realize dat wat goes around comes around.

Irishcream, how was the date? Did you finally let him go or still considering him, just curious anyway

mima247:
I for one would never chose to settle for someone who doesn't hv a life plan written with plan b.or a man who wants me cos I'm financially successful.. But cannot boast of savings.or someone who doesn't keep his word.or someone who is incapable of setting goals for success....so know which traits to look for in apartner.its not about him earning 50k... Its wot he does wit d 50k I'd like to know.so when 100k comes in sure he will do fine.

your post seem sagacious. But it also depends on what you r bringing to the table too

Sorry if this add to the overflowing criticisms.

I noticed from your person you rarely "row" with persons below your percieved class.

It okay to reject someone who is ugly, if ugliness is an outright "no no" for you but not so alright if you can go for one attached with money, class or sort. In that case its you who shut your emotions against him and redefined right/wrong using material basics. Wait, is he ugly or unpresentable or both?

I fear if a guy in your percieve class or having what you have in mind says just the toast hi and does not push for sex too soon, you would do almost anything to keep him even if he doesnt treasure you.

Also i fear if you settle for this guy without ironing the grey areas, it will be for the wrong reason.

Btw, you say he has been helpful as a friend in your charitable friendzone, have you tried helping him to look presentable with his little like those male relatives with little.

Sometimes when what you want does not come the way you like, yet it has the core needed, unchanging value you desire then there can be hope if the undesirable qualities can be changed to taste.

Would there be any shift in your emotions if another woman steps in and make him presentable and you saw surely he has potentials to earn above 50k?

I know you worry greatly you cant proudly show him to your friends amongst others but is the worry more because they are friends like you who rarely mingle with male or female below your class? Or am i wrong?

I will advice you to be sure the guy loves u rather than u been emotional for him. Once you are sure he loves you, then u are good to go.

mima247:
Excuse me but I hv to say this... I'm a female...i wasn't pretty but I worked on myself and now people rave about how beautiful I've become....i held on to a job most men would reject... So I could not b a liability to my husband in future.. I learnt to dress well and comport myself wit decorum.now guys walk up to me... Why would I just accept anybody without having my standards... D world is such a superficial place.... Men judge based on wot they see... A beautiful sufficient woman they want... But they wont accept u as ugly or struggling.. But u guys want us to accept u and manage u as poor ignorant and broke ass.its sad really...

God bless u... I wonder y some pple r suggesting for her to settle for less. I bliv d best await us all

senorB:
@OP, did we fall from the same tree?? I'm also facing same issues and it's driving me crazy,

I'm also a 29 year old beautiful lady but in my case there are rich, young men asking for my hand in marriage but the feelings is just not there. i want to marry for love and not just social status.

whoever said love is not an emotion but decision is definitely lying, love is both


emotions and decision; i can decide to love you but once the emotions isn't coming naturally my sister it's only Mechanical(I believe you are not an Engineer)

Marrying someone you don't love with the hope that love will grow is risky, you shouldn't gamble with stuffs like that. if you are a Christian you know what "for better, for worse" means...divorce is def. not an option

I'd like to refer you to Leke Alder's Jack n Jill Live on FB, you would know there's more to this your issue than what people think. I'm wearing your shoes and i know how it feels.

Above all pray to God for directions, all the best, I'm talking plenty already. I'm out of here!!!

Smtmes I ask myself wot do ladies really want?? U need to re access cos butterflies in d belly shudnt be dat hard to get. Lol also u might comparing them to an ex or smtn. Check urself dats all I mean to say. Cheers

IlekeHD:
My current problem, except mine is neither ugly or broke.

It's like the gods are forcing me on this guy

No flame.

Did I hear u say no flame? 1stly everybody shudnt be this way to u cos all these guys can be dsame rite? Secondly. Flames can be overrated dear. Ask Whitney she who look for flames and ended up with a thug(bobby) when more decent guys were worshiping d ground she walked on. Wot happen nxt she ended up a junkie and d rest is history. My point? Flames overrated especially if other things are fine. Character d most important. Don't keep them gud niggas waiting too long dear. Cheers

softysparky:

Never you marry someone you are not attracted to emotionally/physically just out of pity, loneliness or frustration. Most times no matter how much energy and time you put in the marriage trying to fix your it, you see yourself building up resentment towards him without any reason.

I wonder what sex would be like in such marriage.

I agree with u Totally really bt then I say most gals r myopic in nature(only see d present) which shudnt be. Just checkout 50cents, ice prince. Ugly broke ass niggas still got a future u knw! Lol

humilitypays:
...and you are proud to say this and even using it to advice someone SMH for you.

Take it or leave it, that your so-called fiance is only saying YES to you now because all the Mr. Rights she has been waiting for have been disappointing her...and not coming forth...so she now saw you as her last option...and believe me, she may hurt you in future because she is accepting you now out of pity, which is dangerous!

You wooed a girl for 4 years and she only said yes to you after 4years and you are happy about it, gosh!

Guys listen: I am not an expert in woman affairs, but I can boldly tell you all that it takes less than 1minute for a girl or lady to know if you are the kind of man she wants or not...and will take from 1 minute - 1 month (at worst), for a lady to tell you yes. Any girl that delays more than this doesn't like you at all...she isn't feeling you at all...she's only struggling to find something to make her like you while waiting for her dream man to come around and if her kind of man shows up, u are gone, but her dream man doesn't show up, she may just consider you whilst being unhappy inside.





So you better screen that your girlfriend abi fiance well to avoid future regrets.

Guys just be falling their hand....if a girl says NO...common guys, move on cheerfully and work hard to be that Mr. Right they all want and you will be the one laughing and making choice.

No man is born ugly! Every man is handsome and unique...the only problem a man has is MONEY!

Lack of money makes a man look ugly and unlovable...once a man has money, he will be confident and bold...and those are what makes up a man's handsomeness and not just 6 packs!

If you like, have 12 packs, if you aren't financially buoyant, then you are ugly in the eyes of women!

Check all the rich guys in the world whom super-gorgeous ladies are dying to have, are they that physically attractive? NO!

E.g.

Kanye West - married to Kim K
Jay Z- married to Beyonce
Snoop Dogg
Our own Adams Oshiomhole, Obasanjo, Chief Mbanefo married to the most beautiful woman in Nigeria...google her, Taiye Taiwo, Mario Baloteli, etc.


Guys work hard and pray...the only challenge you have to becoming that dream guy most ladies daydream about is financial lack...if you are doing business, do it harder and pray for God's favour and reduce the rate at which u chase ladies to avoid distraction and waste of scarce resources.

If you are working, keep upgrading and gathering experience and also find a way to set up a side business.

If you are into handwork, work hard and pray.

I pray this day for God to bless as many hardworking guys working to make it in life because it is so humiliating what most guys face today in the hands of ladies just because they don't have money, its well guys!

belated

my dear, she made me understand her reasons for not saying yes at the time, of which i was guilty of all she said ,moreover she was not like those other girls out there who value material things more than dignity. check my post very well i said my kind of job exposed me to too many women, meaning i was a player, not really someone most reasonable woman want to settle down with then, but now am changed.
believe me i choose her in the midst of hundred of my girls because she value herself highly then, she only is worth my waiting and now its paying up.i don't even ask a woman out let alone spending weeks on her most times we just start hanging out trust me. she is just exceptional and that is what i had always wanted. beside people don't hurt me because am not that emotional, so save your advice for me. thanks

zicca:
My dear,marriage is a tough deal even with d one u love,cos with time,love alone might not be enough to carry d weight dat comes later in d institution,is better to remain single than to b miserable in marriage,is like a moving train,people in d train can't wait to get down while others can't wait to get in.

Are you speaking from experience or quoting someone?