Mystiqme:


Actually he has 2 kids, family of 4.

Fiction is all I see, anyways God bless his hustle if it's actually true.

Bros, you can manage it better by simply STOP sending them the money. Yes, you heard me well, STOP sending the money because, these guys will never use their church mind to STOP asking,except you STOP responding in their favour.

There is nothing wrong in sending people money from abroad, say your Parents, family members, close friends(note, not all friends are friends ooo, we have unfriendly friends o) etc, but sending money to one old school mate, I haven't seen in over 2 decades because you saw me on FB, no way, I wont do that , except the person in question was really my close pal that I was looking forward to reunite with. Anyone could add you on FB and pose as your old school mate and upload their pictures and keep demanding money from others, no be today....

God loves a cheerful giver doesn't mean giving away all your life savings to impress others, if conditions changes for bad,(God forbid) the same people will say, what have you been doing with all your money all these years.Please learn from other wise people, and live your life.

Bros, could it be that you upload different fine pictures of yours on FB, showing them your levels have changed, there is nothing wrong in that, but I dont do it.

I have FB friends in abroad, nothing like monetary request as they are not owing me, so I don't expect such too, but I cant be sending money to people as if I paying back a loan.

People must learn to respect themselves.

you yourself na bragger you be.

calcal:
you yourself na bragger you be.

a braggart..he's not.

Sunofgod:


Abeg - Send via 'Western Union' - my account has some overdraft issues at the moment.

Send me your account details including online logins, pins and password and I'll send the $20.

Once I've found a new job I'll confirm 'payday' with you,

Thanks in advance!

this yeye man don kee me wiv laughter

astrodome:
Help!! Friends, family, former school mates and others are killing me with financial demands. Everyday I receive facebook (fb) messages, phone calls, email messages and messages from other communication avenues from family members, friends close and distant, school mates I have not seen in 20 years but with whom I reconnected on fb, and even random fb friends (meaning I do not know them personally but somehow we managed to be friends on fb). They all have the same story: please send me money, anything.

Each month I send nearly 3k to Nigeria and they keep asking for more.

Do they think I pluck money from trees in America?
Do they think every Nigerian in America is doing drugs or credit card fraud to make money?
Are they thinking that since Akin or Emeka made it in America (in many cases by selling drugs and doing credit card fraud), I should also make it and therefore be able to satisfy their unending demands?

How do I explain to them that I have bills (auto, mortgage, water-sewer, electricity, gas, phone, credit card) to pay. And then I have to run my family (of 4) and fuel 2 cars, and on top of that, I have to save also for the rainy day - for when kids get to college.

I am able to resist the random fb friends because I do not have any personal connection with them, but how do I scare the ones I know off without sounding rude and unhelping? I know that when you stop giving, you become an enemy.
Help! Before a fellow nairalander runs amock on the streets of America because of pressure from Nigeria

Just for disclosure: I am well-heeled in the US mid-upper middle class, earning a 6-figure pay, holds a PhD, and involved in R4D activities. But I live in a US city (name withheld) where mortgage payment alone takes 25% of my monthly income. So you can imagine that after paying all bills, I do not have tons of money left over to give out on frequent basis.

Please advise on how to handle this, Naija style . Thanks

You get PhD and you are still asking us jamb questions?
Change your phone number and ignore facebook messages.

OP you didn't have to give us all those details, anyways let me tell you something i have come to understand
if you give once then they won't free you until they drain you and bear it in mind that you cannot satisfy folks.
my family and friends did the same to me, i heard from my pastor that we should be wise, when they come asking
give only what won't be a headache to you...never lend to family and friends except you are willing to forget it. Now
if they ask for 50k i give 25 or 20k...i find it difficult to say no to them but my dear dem go run you down if you don't firm up.
stop taking every call from home.

[quote author=astrodome post=35649023]

I do not think so. Professors are known to always enunciate opinions, no matter how tenuous.

How much of one's total worth does one give out to extended family members and friends?

It is only a small fraction.

If a man has the means to be wealthy, surely he will be wealthy.

But this won't be possible in a society where unemployment and lack of development thrive.

M4gunners:
Op you are not alone. I'm also in the same situation you are. I have blocked my fb,next online will be whatapp. They have no heart i tell you.

my husband dont delete whatsapp na, where else will i ask you for my monthly allowance?

themosthigh:
my man,you are living the life that most nigerian desire and thank god younhave money to even send....while i was rich,i even give more money to strangers.....god will bless you everyday....i use to be rich before but my mothers sickness took all my money.....i will add you up on nairaland but please i need to borrow 1500 dollars from you to complete my mothers medical bill...help a brother in need biko

mumu

sliimzz:
why are u guys taking this dude serious while he is busy laughing at all ur comments....he is just showing off here...cant u see?

if he was living in Nigeria would you have said he was showing off?

MarryMeee:
my husband dont delete whatsapp na, where else will i ask you for my monthly allowance?

Ur husband? Are you in dream? I'm single not married biko.

Goldenboy007:
Op or bros or Mister...my people say ; it is not every cloth one spreads outside. I give this one this, I gave that one that , this one begs from me, that one botrrows from me. You earn 6 figures, you did this, you did that. I smell exaggeration here, people that truly give don't make noise but empty barrel makes the loudest noise. Ahan na only you dey US? Bros cool down and humble yourself so that God will lift you up! Probably you are a graduate assistant pursuing your PhD because I have met many associate professors in US and they are not this lousy. 6 figures lekwa Sabi yourself no be abuse o!

if he had shared that he makes$5 per hour im sure it would have brought joy to your heart. Bad belle tings

Dollyak:
Op, with your ridiculously low mortgage to salary ratio, 3k a month isn't that bad. I am sure you live in texas, Washington (North West) or some sh!!t, because there are not many states/career(Excluding medical fields) that pays decent six figures with such a ridiculously low rental ratio, unless you are a world class specialist.
Anyways, you just need to learn to say no. If you are going to give, you need to make sure it's going towards a self sustaining programme for your family and friends. The amount my dad have given to his ridiculously large nuclear family is definitely into seven figures. Yet, nothing to show for it . Therefore, be strict and give wisely.

your father has given 7figures (in nairas of course) but you still text guys to buy you pizza because dont you dont have salt in your house to cook? God jus dey watch you

vague:
your father has given 7figures (in nairas of course) but you still text guys to buy you pizza because dont you dont have salt in your house to cook? God jus dey watch you

In naira of course... Hahaha I laugh at your cringe worthy post. Its funny how guys think every Nigerians on nl are failures. In the end you are just an irrelevant nairalander hoping to get a cheap points on someone you don't even know. You are just as stupid as those judging the op as a liar without knowing his true financial status.
Your cheap shot attempt is a total failure... an embarrassing one at that. Try a more intelligent one, unless you know me or my family.

vague:
your father has given 7figures (in nairas of course) but you still text guys to buy you pizza because dont you dont have salt in your house to cook? God jus dey watch you

What a life ehh . *smack my head*

Too many hilarious comments @astrodome you will just to have to tell them that you cannot help some of them. You dont have to give anyone any explanation for it because its your money, you work for it and your determine how it will be used.

Some people have a spirit of poverty possessing them. They believe they are entitled to other people's money, they have no intentions of making their own.

Learn to be firm when its needed, you can never please everyone. Sometimes its okay to disappoint some people for the sake of your peace of mind.

knxpin:

Old boy, your case is no different from any other person living in the USA, We all went through the same problem you are into.These people will suck you dry before you know it.They term us MUGU1 from America. They have houses, families and exotic cars in Nigeria and they still want to extort from you not minding what you goes through here in America. You open a line of business in Nigeria, they will frustrate you, actually Nigerians are the most insatiable people on earth. Please start building your own things in Nigeria, start investment for you and your children and stop sending fading to Nigeria before they the people you help would say oh he has spent 20 yrs in America and couldn't achieve anything. Don't allow your self to fall in that category.

gbam

Dollyak:

In naira of course... Hahaha I laugh at your cringe worthy post. Its funny how guys think every Nigerians on nl are failures. In the end you are just an irrelevant nairalander hoping to get a cheap points on someone you don't even know. You are just as stupid as those judging the op as a liar without knowing his true financial status.
Your cheap shot attempt is a total failure... an embarrassing one at that. Try a more intelligent one, unless you know me or my family.

It really bothered you that you had to quote me twice? The only comments i made on this thread where of bad belle people like you. You started using info you found on some website to attack the OP, for what? You were the one being corky for no reason.

I never said you a failure i only implied you are a pathological liar. We all know girls like you, you come form daughter of a rich man when your father's networth is not even up to US$100,000.

Anyway im sorry if i spoiled your imaginary rich life. That £5 sweater sold you off. But its okay if you intend to form any further i will not disturb you. You father cannot be giving 7figures (not even in nairas) when you wear regular clothes with your regular ass please sit down and keep quiet.

M4gunners:
Ur husband? Are you in dream? I'm single not married biko.

of cause you cannot be single if you are my husband. Abeg when is my pay day?

vague:
It really bothered you that you had to quote me twice? The only comments i made on this thread where of bad belle people like you. You started using info you found on some website to attack the OP, for what? You were the one being corky for no reason.

I never said you a failure i only implied you are a pathological liar. We all know girls like you, you come form daughter of a rich man when your father's networth is not even up to US$100,000.

Anyway im sorry if i spoiled your imaginary rich life. That £5 sweater sold you off. But its okay if you intend to form any further i will not disturb you. You father cannot be giving 7figures (not even in nairas) when you wear regular clothes with your regular ass please sit down and keep quiet.

....£5 sold me off indeed lol... that's a good one.
The fact you don't even know the brand or the quality shows your ignorance. It's easy to chat $hit on Internet just to get some brownies, but at the end of the day what is real is real. It's not my fault things are frustrating for you, so sit your rascalart down.
Can't be bothered replying your accusations about being cocky. Comprehension and spatial contextual awareness are definitely not your biggest strength.

vague:
your father has given 7figures (in nairas of course) but you still text guys to buy you pizza because dont you dont have salt in your house to cook? God jus dey watch you

I mean, see a comment from a supposedly stable mind. Wtf. So yeah, go wild with your wishful imaginations of my lifestyle. Before I forget, make sure you keep up with my profile to analyse the subsequent ones. Faceless bitchh

Moana:
if he had shared that he makes$5 per hour im sure it would have brought joy to your heart. Bad belle tings

Let me spare you the reply you deserve. You may just be another juvenile delinquent on a mobile internet!

Goldenboy007:


Let me spare you the reply you deserve. You may just be another juvenile delinquent on a mobile internet!

the juvinile deliquent is the person who speaks ill of people with better lives than them, im sorry im too satisfied with my life to stoop to your level.

Dollyak:

....£5 sold me off indeed lol... that's a good one.
The fact you don't even know the brand or the quality shows your ignorance. It's easy to chat $hit on Internet just to get some brownies, but at the end of the day what is real is real. It's not my fault things are frustrating for you, so sit your rascalart down.

thats a £5 worth brand didnt i already tell you?

Can't be bothered replying your accusations about being cocky. Comprehension and spatial contextual awareness are definitely not your biggest strength.

i can most definitely know "cocky and pretentious" when i see it

I mean, see a comment from a supposedly stable mind. Wtf. So yeah, go wild with your wishful imaginations of my lifestyle. Before I forget, make sure you keep up with my profile to analyse the subsequent ones. Faceless bitchh

of anything about yourself you desparately tried to portray about yourself was in any way true, you would not be this angry from what i said. Anyway enjoy the fake life on NL, greet papa in the village for us

vague:
thats a £5 worth brand didnt i already tell you?


i can most definitely know "cocky and pretentious" when i see it

of anything about yourself you desparately tried to portray about yourself was in any way true, you would not be this angry from what i said. Anyway enjoy the fake life on NL, greet papa in the village for us

Uggg.. seriously i am bored now. Golf is often considered a good walk spoilt this obviously holds true here. Your comments add nor substract anything from my poor life style so... shoot.