Dear Gloria,
I feel odd writing you this letter but I have been reading your column for a few
years and I think you are mature and responsible. Besides I enjoy the topics you
write on. I have to implore you not to use my personal details. I don’t mind if
you share with your readers because I’m sure there are many people who are in
the same situation.
I am in my fifties and I have been married for over twenty five years. I am a
successful well-educated professional. I am married to an equally successful
woman that I love very much. She is a few years younger than me but it’s not
a problem, we are well suited. We had been trying to have children for many
years and had not been successful until five years ago when we were blessed
with a beautiful daughter. We were so happy and felt blessed. I had a medical
condition diagnosed two years ago which was challenging but we managed to
get it under control. During the process of treatment it was discovered that I
had a problem and it meant I won’t be able to father children. I was devastated
but worse than that my daughter’s paternity was called into question. I did not
say anything to my wife. I just prayed on it and asked God to help me contain
my feelings for the sake of my daughter. I love my daughter and I decided I
would be the only father she will know. Obviously my wife will not want the
truth to come out for her child’s sake.
We have lived happily over the years but my wife recently became pregnant
again and delivered a son. At first I was shocked then I thought there is nothing
impossible with God and maybe I was healed. I went back to the doctor who
said I still had the problem, saying that there was no way I could be the father.
I was devastated. I love the baby and I feel like his father. Again I am the only
father the boy knows. I have not said anything to my wife but I look at her
differently. I don’t trust her. I am mature and if she had discussed it with me
and we both agreed for her to do it, so that we could have children, then I
would understand. However knowing she has an idea I cannot father children
and pretending the children are mine is very hard to take.
She is enjoying a good life with me and I know she won’t want to give it up. I
am not a young man and my marriage has been good. I am wondering if I
should just let it go and enjoy my children. I feel very differently about things
this second time and it has been affecting my feelings for her. Though I love the
child because I love children, but I do not feel peaceful and she has even made
some comments about my behaviour since the birth of the child.
I would like your advice on what to do. I feel I should confront her about the
deceit, but still let her know that I accept the children. I am worried if I send her
away she could threaten to take the children along, since they are not my
biological children. I was thinking it might be better for me to try to have
another relationship that is honest. It is so hard because she is a nice wife, I
don’t have any complaints other than the children. I am thinking she might
have done it to protect my reputation since she knows how much I want
children.
Please I need your support because I am feeling desperate. I am happy to come
and see you for counselling but please don’t expose me to the world.
Name and some details changed for confidentiality

Source:http://www.punchng.com/columnists/mental-health-matters/a-husbands-painful-dilemma-on-paternity-infidelity/

nairalanders and paternity issues. . . . . . . .. . maybe you folks should stop filling your minds with pornographic stuff, it affects you a lot.

eiyaaaaah...

What happened to communication

She's a hoe




Farm tool I mean

tpiah01:
nairalanders and paternity issues. . . . . . . .. . maybe you folks should stop filling your minds with pornographic stuff, it affects you a lot.

your statement is incoherent and invalid. In your haste to be ftc, you slipped and hit The head hard on stupiidity.

eherbal:
My statement is incoherent and invalid. In my haste to be ftc, I slipped and hit The head hard on stupiidity.

what is ftc?

seems i struck a nerve btw.

are you a p.orn addict?

tpiah01:


what is ftc?

seems i struck a nerve .btw

I Am A P.orn Addict?

typical

.

ease up on the p.orn, its affecting you.

Hmmmm...

tpiah01:


what is ftc?

seems i struck a nerve btw.

are you a p.orn addict?

Smally! The eherbal moniker was right about your 1st post! Your comment was absolutely _stupid and bereft of any logic! This snide pattern you are trying to now use to cover your folly is a waste of time! Next time THINK BEFORE YOU TYPE! Simple!

tpiah01:



I need to ease up on the p.orn, its affecting me .

help is On The way boi

all the porn addicts are out to defend their lifestyles.

stop opening s.tupid threads abeg, nobody send una.

be man enough to deal with the consequences of your choices and stop disturbing us with your whining.

if you are loose then accept yourself as you are!

funlord:


Smally! The eherbal moniker was right about your 1st post! Your comment was absolutely _stupid and bereft of any logic! This snide pattern you are trying to now use to cover your folly is a waste of time! Next time THINK BEFORE YOU TYPE! Simple!

tell the retardo. Stupidiius intete

eherbal:
help is On The way boi

is funlord what you are calling help?

eherbal:
tell me, i am retardo. Stupidiius intete

not just a porn addict, but a coward also.

tpiah01:


Im not just a porn addict, but a coward also.

kids!

tpiah01:



is funlord what you are calling help?

Engaging an utterly _stupid primate such as yourself would be both a waste in time and data! By the way can you kindly stop with your stinking mentions? Its embarrassing to my moniker!

I suggest he visits another hospital to be sure. Then give her the 2 results when he comes back and watch her response. If his claim is true by her action, let her know how disappointed he is. She needs to know that he is aware of what she is doing, so that he can put a stop to it because it might still happen again if he doesn't do something. But he still need to forgive her when she realized her mistake and ask him to, she might have done it for his sake though in a wrong way and the kids must not know about it.

Everyone has one marital borden or the other. Good luck and enjoy ur marriage.

funlord:


Engaging an utterly _stupid primate such as yourself would be both a waste in time and data! By the way can you kindly stop with your stinking mentions? Its embarrassing to my moniker!

if you wanna get rid of the nuisance,just hit The 'report' button and the pest gets banned in jiffy.thank me later

..

tpiah01:
nairalanders and paternity issues. . . . . . . .. . maybe you folks should stop filling your minds with pornographic stuff, it affects you a lot.

pls re examine your comments or I may be forced to think u hav certain brain weakness.

You've got a complicated issue here. Consider losing the children and your wife if you do otherwise. Go test yourself in another hospital, maybe something has happened miraculously. If nothing hasn't changed after the test, I advice you forget any kind of confrontation and pretend you are not aware or suspecting anything from your wife. Also consider your age. Accept the children and show them love and be ready to live with this secret for the rest of your life.

gnchetts:
I suggest he visits another hospital to be sure. Then give her the 2 results when he comes back and watch her response. If his claim is true by her action, let her know how disappointed he is. She needs to know that he is aware of what she is doing, so that he can put a stop to it because it might still happen again if he doesn't do something. But he still need to forgive her when she realized her mistake and ask him to, she might have done it for his sake though in a wrong way and the kids must not know about it.

Everyone has one marital borden or the other. Good luck and enjoy ur marriage.

Mature mind

NeduLuiZ:
What happened to communication

She's a hoe




Farm tool I mean

A farming tool?