@poster
u cant marry someone wen ur in love wid someone else. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

@poster , u only have passion for him not love, u r lusting after him, someone u barely know his parentage and his personality? common babe don't be overriden by the burning desire in u , Lots of guys hide a lot of things behind broad smile by reflecting a personality that is second to none, be wise.

@ poster, u need counseling and trust me , nairaland is the worst place to get it. text / call me 07081168733 so i can help u.

PS: u may wish to ignore

nonsense, u dont serve your man

sad - this is sad,  engaged? - wow? i wonder how you gonna live with this. You wont trust your guy with any female friends after this because you will be afraid of what you did happening.

What I can see - that guy in your office is playing you. As someone said he will never marry you - simple reason - he has chopped you before you committed to him - he has chopped you whilst you were engaged to someone else - he will never trust you and if he marries you, he will treat you like a piece of shit.

Wut you should do - first thing is to forgive yourself - second is to stay away from that bastard who is knowingly wrecking the good thing you had - thirdly is to refocus on your relationship - fourthly - dont do it again.

Another option is to break up with your engaged guy so you can refocus ,

What is sad is this is common in Nigeria - Innocent guys get gals like you who do this stuff to them. I pray all goes well but I wont lie it is hard for me to respect you after this - Hardly anyone here would - even ashewos wont respect you.

Engaged,  chei!

Whats the problem, two for the price of one, I would see them both

this is a serious prblem for u. can u just do your self a favour by asking yourself what you really want. what are you doing wit an unserious guy who has an eleven yrs relationship? do you think he loves you. i advice you to go back to your fiance and appologise for what you ve done and pray he forgives you. God be with you

rockhaven - kindly state why you respect her.

mods kindly check IP address - dont want to be talking to a D-ID

Hello house,

But we must first give credit to beckky45 for her to have come out bold to put this on post knowing fully well millions of people would read it.

Condemnation, abuses, curses or dissapointment in her act will not change anything, the deed has been done already. Let's no forget some of us are even worse than her, i laugh with my mouth wide open when i read through several comments about her action.Why don't we have a second thought and let search our souls individually based on our past and present.

Back to you beckky45, let's call a spade a spade, what you have done is WRONG. I can feel the emotional pains going through your mind. I know psychologically you are not in the right frame of mind, but i beg you to remain FOCUS, please stick to your husband to be because is only with him you can find peace of mind and everlasting happiness.

I am equally not a saint myself, i will advice you fast for seven days and ask God 4 forgiveness, ask God almight 4 divine intervention in your life and most importantly commit your wedding plans which is ahead in his hands.

It might be hard because you both work in same office, please beckky45 stop seeing him, don't call him or text him either. I mean end the relationship, and MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE. You can reach me on 08073547356.

One luv house.

i must confess,u have realy cheapened urself by sleeping with this guy but mistakes like this do happen once in a while.ds other guy is not 4u so leave him and concentrate on ur wedding.he doesnt luv u.uhmmm.we ladies sha.nawao.how can one have pounded yam and be running after eko.

beckky45,

None of us here on NL can cast a stone at you because we have all sin and come short of the glory of God. It is a normal temptation that comes around people planning on getting married, well i can see you have fall for it but you can still get back up again even if you fall 7 times because he lives. what you have done is unrighteous. If man is God you will not live to see tomorrow, my sis just get down on your knees and pray for forgiveness and commit your marriage plans into his hands and he will surely see you through all this tribulations. Remember once you have made this commitment with God, please do not look back at your past. If this is accomplish you will be the best wife in the whole wide world. Can i hear you say !!!Amen!!!

Nobody holy pass

to be frank and to be thoro u are the real meaning of F O O L I S H. It was u dat they saw and decided to create a word called foolish. Why on earth would u do such a thing. u really messed up gal and it would catch up with u. u know the truth and know what to do but u just want some few enjoyment to mess up ur whole life of enjoyment. What kind of marriage are trying to build.a SECRETIVE MARRIAGE where u would not be able to tell ur husband some things. assume someone now knows about the affair and now uses it to blackmail u laer. u need to watch ur step woman u not a gud woman. imagine u wont be able to use urself as an example to ur children. dats bad. betta learn from dis and stay away from ur bangga otherwise u would lose what u've been arranging since.
Take for instance ur fiance gets to know he wont marry. ur bangga has also told u dat he has a relationship. u would be left alone. please stop being foolish u are to old for that. goodluck

@ poster

Thats too bad of you! The guy told you he can't marry you! SPOT THIS. He is just playing on you. Just QUIT immediately,  haaaaaaaaa this is too bad oooo          

And don't tell your fiancee oo!! abeg you in the name of God! If you don't want to ruin your marriage. Just get this feeling off as soon as possible!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11 

That is why we guys need to romantic enough oo! maybe his fiancee is not good in bed enough  The other guy is extra superb  Ouch!

Take it Eazy!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Its gonna be OKAY! 

Folks stop condemning her! Na situation! The guy is just to seductive! haba! SHIT HAPPENS!

DEAR, this ur case is really comlicated. if u really love your man, you would not even look at another guy in the first place so pls take my advice, move on out of their lifes and find some who would make you love him n u wld also cove him, ur case is

you are inlove with a man that does not love you


aren't you just plain stupid?

Mehn though i dint boda readin thru ur story buh i 4rm wat i gathered, 'love' means 'sex' 2. Pple wld always bash u and u cant tell me u expected odawise.unfortunately u're one crazy cocksuckin bitch, give yaself a break, gettin plenti 4rm 2 sides, NO. The day u walk down d altar with dat fiance,thunder will strike u dead. My 1 advice 4 u is to break d engagement, Try not 2 fool around wit different men until d rite man comes

My advice cancel the engagement and establish a relationship with this guy.that way you wont be confused

@bekkie 45

you are treading dangerous waters here,luv. yep, i can quite say this guy has feelings for you and for him. but i dont think these feelings are strong enuf to culminate into a positive relationship;and by saying positive relationship,i mean one leading to marriage. He may not be aware of it but he's really wasting ur time. Forget the fact dat u love him or he u;dats so relative. u will only cause urself more pain to be wit him any longer so why bother? Concentrate on your engagement/wedding and on fortifying the relatnship wit ur fiance. Obviously, making mental calculations will show dat u guys have a wealth of baggage u wuldnt be able to surmount if u hookup o, think twice dear.

Love is a splendid feeling, but there are some love that aren't to be, if he really loves you then he should be ready for a commitment, based on what you wrote, he's someone who is pathologically afraid of commitment and i know its gonna hurt but the best thing you can do for yourself is walk away while you still can, if you keep holding on to him and ruin what you have with your fiance who clearly loves you enough to marry you, then you may wake up one day and put a bullet in your head when the guy who can't commit, walks out on you, my advice to you is to use your head and not your heart

i say tanx to people dat gave reasonable advice,anyway as 4 me i think am getting over it nw.cos i avnt had any date wit him dis month which is unlike b4 and i dont think of even aving one .anyway we av both discuss on phone.he is aware of my intro and we both decide to quit,bt we still talk on phone.

I agree with Madambini: 'stolen water tastes sweet'. And I must let you know that you are not alone in that struggle, a lot of women do it. So, dont let people with caustic tongues on this forum make you feel like dirt. You're just being human and woman. Everyone wants variety when it comes to sex, because 'variety is the spice of life'. Unfortunately it's too late to stop the lust. You've tasted and enjoyed the stolen water, and you'll always want more of it, either with the new man or another. Unless you get some genuine help, (sexual therapy) you'll always compare your husband's performance with the new man's. You would even be imagining him making love to you while your husband is physically doing it to you. That's why you need help. Not to mention the difficulty of ending the lust while you're both working in the same building. You need help; get help quick. Wish you well.

@Becky45

A word is enough for the wise

Most pple have said it all here, only u knows what is good for you
But my worry is that u are not willing to marry this guy and neither is he willing. so what else do u want from him

U are enjoying the flirting, pls do not let it ruin what you have and if you kwn you don't really love your finace, be sure to walk out now that it is not too late.

We don't want another Thread .: AM CHEATING ON MY HUSBAND" Pls what do i do?
"Make the Hay while the Sun shine.

stories like this make marriage scary, fear of d unknown

My dear just disentangle yourself from it, give the necessary feelings to ur husband to be.Think of the good time u ve spent together, gradually u will begin to forget the guy in your office.ve in mind that he does not deserve u or u deserve him.He lied, think about a crashed relationship if ur fiance finds out.I know u don't want to loose ur husband to be.Think about all these things and ve in mind that u will loose both of them.In this case starting afresh will be painful. So baby girl use ur head and not ur heart.

It really makes marriage so scary, i was just wondering  is this hell??
Nawa oohhhh and she is so proud of it

some pple r just agents of satan. out to steal, kill n destroy. Lord save us from such pple.

it is called KARMA.It mst surely come back 2 u.u did it with ur eyes wide open.if u cnt b faithful 2 ur fiancee,who is still new and fresh,hw much more wen it wud be upto ten years,wen u'll no longer feel his naked body.by then,u'l definitely Bleep toy boys.i pray d guy gets 2knw abt it and d playboy leaves u also,den u will b single all ur life.bt certainly,ur man will commit adultery someday.pray he dont give std.IT IS CALLED KARMA.AM SORRY [color=#990000][/color]

have the decensy to tell you betroved that you have been cheating on him and let him find someone worthy of his love. if you can sheat on him now then there is nothing preventing you from doing it after your married.

craP, do not hurt ur fiance by letting him get to know b4 u letting him, the fact that his wife 2 be is on love wif someone else is enough hurt; a man choosing 2 marry u or any woman is no small deal.
if u love d other guy then consider a breakup with ur fiance(however it could sound), if u want ur hubby then u could make a hard decision, move ur work place.
Ur big, know wat u want.
i really wish u luck

Pls forgive me, I dont normally say this, You are nothing but a blind she-goat with the desire of a pig, Pity your poor fiance, once again i'm sorry