Our company folded up and was closed down without payment of some months salary, let alone paying off. Since then it's not been easy financially and otherwise while seriously looking for job.

The one that surpises me is some friends' attitude since i am jobless.These are people when we were doing well in our office, we mingled together etc, but since the jobless saga started, many of them started disssociating themselves.They wont visit you as usual, they can't even give you a call, most time when you call them, they won't even pick your calls after seeing many missed calls from you on their phone but that wasn't the case when things were okay.

Telling them about helping you in search of jobs seems like a disturbance, many of them you will forward your cv to, will simply ignore making efforts while claiming as if they are doing anything on it. You will be seeing yourself as an abandoned fellow.The story is endless.

I begin to ask, are these as a result of wrong friends or normal thing. Advise or share your experience.

FTC , first time ever . I feel your pain because I am presently wearing your shoe. Most people don't want to help because they want to feel superior , this goes down to some family members .

My own eyes have seen a lot, friends that when u see them in church or gathering they wld be forming phone call,its when they see u,that they wld know the phone is ringing and excuse themselves to receive phone call for hrs. God help us.

it's always been like that. When u're successful, pple will run ur ba3 down with calls, but when d table turns u hardly even get a flash..

That's life Op.

During my sch days, I was into business but d global meltdown messed things up n I became broke. Even broker dan my gateman n dis lasted a long while.

ALL FRIENDS DESERTED ME.

It was then I learnt the true nature of human beings.
Alas, it was family support dat saved me till I cud get back on my feet.

Today, I invest in my family first n some ppl who I know have a pure heart.

......Don't worry, it's just a learning phase.

yomi007k:
That's life Op.

During my sch days, I was into business but d global meltdown messed things up n I became broke. Even broker dan my gateman n dis lasted a long while.

ALL FRIENDS DESERTED ME.

It was then I learnt the true nature of human beings.
Alas, it was family support dat saved me till I cud get back on my feet.

Today, I invest in my family first n some ppl who I know have a pure heart.

......Don't worry, it's just a learning phase.

INVEST IN FAMILY-thats it. Evn my Dog z family. Well op, dnt ask anybdy a tin, tryna mek it symbiotic, hit d gym, ex ur gurl or she exes u, cut cost, EAT WELL, volunteer for stuff to kip u busy yl lookin for anoda, B OCUPIED.

MrHighSea:
INVEST IN FAMILY-thats it. Evn my Dog z family. Well op, dnt ask anybdy a tin, tryna mek it symbiotic, hit d gym, ex ur gurl or she exes u, cut cost, EAT WELL, volunteer for stuff to kip u busy yl lookin for anoda, B OCUPIED.

I dey tel u ooo. Like u dey read my mind.

These were all I did including "symbiosis"

Some people think being helped out with cash or kind is a right.

Some people should lose their over bloated sense of entitlement and choose their friends wisely.

Lol - OP welcome to life and the real world. I was in the same situation once but I came through it a stronger and better person.

These valuable lessons helped me at the time and they continue to do so even now;

1. No one can change your life except you.

2. Everyone has problems and challenges of their own, do not expect anyone to take panadol for your headache.

3. Success in this life is your personal responsibility (Zainab) do not put it on anyone.

No 3 is my favourite personal mantra I chant it on a regular basis to keep me focused, motivated and reliant on myself (and Heaven as well)

While friends may come across as insensitive and uncaring in our trying times, we have a responsibility to fight for our lives, pull ourselves up and get it together, regardless.

My experience was a good thing for me because it reinforced my sense of self sufficiency & independence.

It also helped me to identify my fair & foul weather friends. Suck it up OP hopefully this will be a good experience for you as well.

Never forger 3 types of friend in life

1-those who were with you in hard times
2-those who put you in hard times
3-those who left you in hard times

yes that's true. dat z life for u.friends DAT I helped when I was financially bouyant are no where to be found nw wen d table turn for me.but here I am today I giv God all d Glory.dey ve really mould me and I thank dem for DAT

marshalcarter:
Never forger 3 types of friend in life


1-those who were with you in hard times

2-those who put you in hard times

3-those who left you in hard times

4. Those you put in hard times.

My bro or sis.

All humans are like that. Jesus was a popular preacher in his days and " the whole world moved after him ". So exclaimed the pharisees who were envious of his success at crowd pulling.

When he got arrested, everybody ran away including his personal body guards and disciples. He even told Peter, " You will deny me 3 times "..

Dear, look unto God, he alone cannot dissappoint you.

yomi007k:
That's life Op.

During my sch days, I was into business but d global meltdown messed things up n I became broke. Even broker dan my gateman n dis lasted a long while.

ALL FRIENDS DESERTED ME.

It was then I learnt the true nature of human beings.
Alas, it was family support dat saved me till I cud get back on my feet.

Today, I invest in my family first n some ppl who I know have a pure heart.

......Don't worry, it's just a learning phase.

Yes o. Nothing like Family.

Thats one Of the definitions of life.

One very important bitter truth of life.....
EXPECT NOTHING from anybody.
Just keep your focus on Jesus Christ, be diligent and upright in whatever you do. Trust me, in no distant time, things will fall in place.
OP cheer up, nothing lasts forever except the word of God who is Jesus Christ so hold on to him firmly.

No Money No Frnd. That's d bitter truth

4C2215131:

4. Those you put in hard times.

I hope u can read 1..2..3 very well

Your friends avoid you as if you have ebola and
you will always feel lonely as if you're the only one in this life.
For me, I stop expecting anything from anybody a long time ago if they give me fine and if they don't look my side i just move on, I believe that for every success story there must be a struggle story Just be good to everybody and yourself don't be lazy, associate yourself with things that can positively affects your life and stop living a pitiable life because all men are born for themselves grab any job opportunity that come your way no matter how small it is and learn how to manage your little resources wisely.

Ur friends are not the guys u met in dat popular bar, or ur colleagues, or those that started associating with you wen the going got good simply because they now see u as one in their class, ur friends are not the guys that live in ur estate, yes it's good to mingle but dnt expect much... u remember those guy in secondary school? Those ur friends in secondary school dat went to university together with you and stuck with u post nysc/pre first job... i hope u didn't snub dem wen ur going got good cos those are the guys that will go (even if not the whole extra mile cos afterall we are all human) half a mile extra for you.

That's life bro..
You just have to live with it... Tho i have some friends that stick with me all through, the best you can ever ask for.. And to those friends I'd do anything for...
Just focus on getting a job, and when its your time, be forgiving..
God bless us all


As someone rightly said.. The age of friends ended in secondary school.. Most of the others are just acquaintances.. Only a few get the nod of approval

no friend, no foe. spend your time with your family. no friends in reality. many will clinch because of the benefit they are getting or will get.

As much as il like to totally agree about this friend syndrome


those of you saying 'nothing like family' hope you know its hurts more, worse when what the OP is saying is done by your blood?

Lalasticlala, Fp o

.

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Thats life

Trust no one in ur ups and downs in life...You are on your own

That is how people are. Dont put your hope or trust in friends to avoid shock.

OP..

Stop whining.. Its not personal.

Out of sight, out of mind. The moment you leave their line of sight, the less they see you. Its just natural.


Also your mindset awould make you see things that don't exist. You may be reading things that are not there. I have friends who are jobless that feel that because I am working and doing well I should be able to get them a job which in all honesty I cant. Not everybody who has a job has the ability to influence recruitment. Even those that work in H.R.

I hear a lot of anger and self pity in your post. I felt the same way too. I was just looking through my account statement a few minutes ago and was seeing transactions with colleagues from my old job that I have not even heard a word from ever since I left that job. They didn't even call to ask me how I was faring and stuff. I don't hold it against them, everybody is too busy trying to make a good life for themselves to be bothered with me.

However let me tell you about how I got my new job.. It was via recommendation by an old colleague who wasn't even that close to me sef then. But apparently, he was with his uncle who works in another company when their conversation got towards work and his uncle mentioned an availability for a job description that I used to do. He just mouthed off that he knew someone who did similar job in his company that just got laid off ad that's how I got a call out of nowhere from the guy saying to send my resume to his uncle. Till tomorrow its like a miracle of sorts because the person who did this for me was not my friend, just that guy that I would stop by his office to have some small talk with. I don't know his surname, never been to his house, never sat for drinks with him, never hung out with him. Just hang shakes and how are you sort of friend. I never even told him what I did nor do I know his job description either.

Basically, stop expecting too much from other people. Help will come when help comes. Maintain all friendships as best as you can as I believe good and bad friends have their uses.

Wishing you the best.

sorry bro.. dont worry God will provide another job. Just keep praying and look for another job.. i believe Miracle will happen.....

Na so