kok:

Marketer in a bank ko! then she isnt my wife! else she would be marketing her knowlege and not other people's stuffs

kok:

is it about money fight? what if the man has got all the money she would ever need, and all the guy wants is a wife to raise his kids in the proper way?

Fhemmmy:

I wont advice my sister to get into such marriage oh, cos such men always maltreat the woman, cos dem no send.

gen2genius:

Frankly, even if I became the richest man in the world, my wife would still use her degree to have a meaningful contribution to the society. What's all the fuss about a woman staying at home for the rest of her life, burying her talents, certificates etc because she wants to have a happy home? Sonya Carson (mother of Ben and Curtis Carson) was a single mother who worked tirelessly to feed and educate her children. Yet she still had ample time to bring them up to become responsible men. There are several other women like that. You don't have to stay at home all-day long to have good children. You can have a successful career and a successful marriage. It's a matter of being resourceful and being able to set your priorities right.

Which of the men advocating "full-time housewife" role would be happy to send their daughters to school up to Masters level only for her to bury everything in the name of marriage and family life? Can any of these men agree to be full-time househusbands? Was a woman created JUST to bear and rear children, cook and clean a house? If yes, why didn't God just give them mothering abilities without any other skills? Why are women created with the same mental abilities as men?  And why do we even have to send our girls to general schools? I mean we could just create a School of Mothering and Family Life and send all our girls there instead of spending so much money to train them to study a course like Mass Communication only to end up communicating nothing except lullabies and kitchen songs!

A woman could stay at home with her kids in their formative years, but anything after that, count me out!!!

theolar:

I beg to differ on d definition of a real woman being a financially independent woman . A beta defnt is in d book of proverbs

SeanT21:

I have nothing against being a housewife but I can not see myself in that position. I am too Ambitious and Independent. I like the idea of going out there and making my own money. I think a husband will better respect a wife that makes her own money than a woman that relies on him for everything. I do not care If I marry a billionaire, I will never be a housewife. I will be out there doing what "real women" do.

Theblessed:

[b] Wish Beyonce' INDEPENDENT WOMAN could hammer into the chicken brains of our housewifery sister for life. No intelligent, ambitious, confident woman with high self esteem and knowing exactly where she's going and where she wants to be in this day in age, would want to sit around at home prepare cookies, eat babies leftovers and tidy up afterwards, no! There's nothing wrong in being married and having a career or even work part-time. It gives you a sense of SELF/RESPECT. Even men themselves would tell you, they don't like DEPENDENT women as they want their women to have a life and the fact that, you are contributing into the family money pot would accord you greater respect from both your husband, the inlaws and your social circle.

Am I harsh on these ladies? Absolutely! Someone on here said it's 'Choice', and I am saying no - it's has alot to do with self esteem, laziness, lack of ambition, the values they were brought up with, their social circle etc - otherwise why would an intelligent and educated woman end up in the home as a domestic slave even if her husband is BILL GATES. In fact, Bill Gates wife is a very busy woman - doing something all the time e.g. her/her husband's charity work - check her schedule!!

I'm only sorry for the men that hooked up with these layabouts but then, men don't realise the quality of women they ended up with until after the honey moon and first baby by then, skool don dismiss. Personally, in this situation I can only forgive those of them who could not read or write (the illitrates) but many of them are quite industrious - striving to set up small businesses of their own thus showing not only ambition but dignity however, their educated counterparts hide behind motherhood - an excuse for dependency mentality. Sorry for their husbands, though. [/b]

kok:


You have spoken well, Actually, that is exactly what I was going to say.

I have nothing against being a housewife but I can not see myself in that position. I am too Ambitious and Independent. I like the idea of going out there and making my own money. I think a husband will better respect a wife that makes her own money than a woman that relies on him for everything. I do not care If I marry a billionaire, I will never be a housewife. I will be out there doing what "real women" do.

@Seant21
What else will I say? This is ME!
The only thing I am planning is to make my job more flexible so that I can have more control over my time than now.

jumie:

Housewife ke?

What happens when the hubby dies (God forbid)? Will you'll go on the streets begging or run to your in laws for help (plleeaase). Every woman should wake up and face reality! Plan for yourself and your kids.

Secretz:

lol, good thread!  

Ok, now I'm 50/50 on this matter. As far as I'm concerned there has to be a balance. I feel that I myself am well educated, I also have a lot of work experience and have been working too since 16. I am very ambitious and have many goals for the future . . . . ,
Now If my hubby either came into  a lot of money or got a real good job and ASKED me to be a housewife, I would agree, with some conditions:

1. I am able to start my own business (MY BUSINESS)
2. I work part time in my business (I would have managers, supervisors etc)
3. ^^^^ This would happen when the kids are at school, as it enables me to utilise my qualifications, skills and experience to achieve my goals.

If my husband could look after the whole family, pay all the bills etc, then let him (whilst he is doing this, I will be saving my own money    ), why should I continue to work for someone else when I can have others working for me, whilst I look after my family and be  a business woman at the same time.

If my husband decides to mess off, would the business and all the profits not be mine? Ladies, think about it. . . .
There are 2 different types of housewives, there are those who are, because they have no choice (as in no qulifications, skills and experience to get a good job) and there are those who are the opposite of that. They use their brain to make the best of the situation.

Since I am a teacher (I work school hours, and get all HOLIDAYS off PAID!!), there isn't much need for me to be a housewife. I'm already set        

Don't jealous me. . .  

spikedcylinder:

Its strictly a personal issue. Trying to quantify or qualify between house wives and career women on the long run is terribly useless.

Theblessed:

[b] Wish Beyonce' INDEPENDENT WOMAN could hammer into the chicken brains of our housewifery sister for life. No intelligent, ambitious, confident woman with high self esteem and knowing exactly where she's going and where she wants to be in this day in age, would want to sit around at home prepare cookies, eat babies leftovers and tidy up afterwards, no!  There's nothing wrong in being married and having a career or even work part-time.  It gives you a sense of SELF/RESPECT.   Even men themselves would tell you, they don't like DEPENDENT women as they want their women to have a life and the fact that, you are contributing into the family money pot would accord you greater respect from both your husband, the inlaws and your social circle.  

Am I harsh on these ladies?  Absolutely! Someone on here said it's 'Choice', and I am saying no - it's has alot to do with self esteem, laziness, lack of ambition, the values they were brought up with, their social circle etc - otherwise why would an intelligent and educated woman end up in the home as a domestic slave even if her husband is BILL GATES.  In fact, Bill Gates wife is a very busy woman - doing something all the time e.g. her/her husband's charity work - check her schedule!!

I'm only sorry for the men that hooked up with these layabouts but then, men don't realise the quality of women they ended up with until after the honey moon and first baby by then, skool don dismiss.   Personally, in this situation I can only forgive those of them who could not read or write (the illitrates) but many of them are quite industrious - striving to set up small businesses of their own thus showing not only ambition but dignity however, their educated counterparts hide behind motherhood  - an excuse for dependency mentality.  Sorry for their husbands, though. [/b]

Secretz:

lol, good thread!  

Ok, now I'm 50/50 on this matter. As far as I'm concerned there has to be a balance. I feel that I myself am well educated, I also have a lot of work experience and have been working too since 16. I am very ambitious and have many goals for the future . . . . ,
Now If my hubby either came into  a lot of money or got a real good job and ASKED me to be a housewife, I would agree, with some conditions:

1. I am able to start my own business (MY BUSINESS)
2. I work part time in my business (I would have managers, supervisors etc)
3. ^^^^ This would happen when the kids are at school, as it enables me to utilise my qualifications, skills and experience to achieve my goals.

If my husband could look after the whole family, pay all the bills etc, then let him (whilst he is doing this, I will be saving my own money    ), why should I continue to work for someone else when I can have others working for me, whilst I look after my family and be  a business woman at the same time.

If my husband decides to mess off, would the business and all the profits not be mine? Ladies, think about it. . . .
There are 2 different types of housewives, there are those who are, because they have no choice (as in no qulifications, skills and experience to get a good job) and there are those who are the opposite of that. They use their brain to make the best of the situation.

Since I am a teacher (I work school hours, and get all HOLIDAYS off PAID!!), there isn't much need for me to be a housewife. I'm already set        

Don't jealous me. . .  

truly-opal:

@ poster

Why are women so hard on themselves, either we like it or not the mental and psychological network of a woman is diffrent from that of a man. If you aint willing to take care of you family , why start one in the first place. All the ladies making noise abt balancin work and family definately aint reffering to nigerian setup, ypu leave for work at 6:00 and get back by 9:00, u be witch 2 be able to assist ur kids with home work, cook a lovely meal for ur man and have extra strenght to give him some TLC,
My kids (when i eventually hav them) are my No. 1 investment. no amount of money carreer i have will ever be compared in importance to them. O.K agreed , the husband may die, well, i have seen many carreer women that toiled for years and saved money together with hubby and buy joint properties with him, only for hubby 2 die and his relatives claiming everything. Ehen , the husband can desert you , we are all living in a world of uncertainity, thousands of people are dissmissed from there jobs, owing to 1 reform or the other, or simply becos the new boss wants 2 provide space for his towns ppl in the office.
My suggesstion is;
1) if my husbands salary is very unimpressive, i will definately contribute. By getting a job that allows me to appreciate my family. such as teaching or weekend jobs.
2) if my husband earns reasonably well, i will stay at home and be a STAY AT HOME MOM, take 100% care of my kids, wats d point of d cash their daddy is making if they see the faces of strangers mare than their parents.NAHHHH. though a stay at home mom needs side attractions to keep her brain active, my hubby will give me some cash to invest in WISELY. makin me my own boss at my own pace.
3) If i feel i must work to justify my certificates, i will shelve kids and possibly marriage until i reach a gud carreer position and have earned mega bucks.Then i will smartly invest my money, retire, get married and have kids ( all is possible with technology) and enjoy my money, hubby and kids.
THIS LIFE IS TO BE ENJOYED, NOT TO BE ENDURED