I know some people here especially amebo no1 will criticise me but I will still say my mind. It's been a long time and I know it's over but sometimes I imagine him being with other women nd that still pains me, how can? R there other pple dat feel this way nd wat can be done dat even if I think of it, I wud laugh. It won't pain me as much.

u beta die quick quick, its perfectly natural, but might be an expression of ur immaturity wiv regards to rel and sex, dat used to happen to me in my late teens by the time i was bout 20ty dat was all childs play, i cn watch my ex shaggin some one else sef hahaha

Die?? Y death? Of cause not. I am not immature, just d thut of it, maybe 1day I would think of it and just laugh

T e e e a. Y don't you get sum1 to shag you instead of this thinking.

i hope that day comes soon, i didnt actually mean u sld die, was mearly responding to it killing u lol

Robocob, I have and even had another relationship after him but that is not wat I want 2b doing 2 get my mind off

Vivaladiva, got it now, apologies 4d B word.

i appologise for jumping on ur back like a crazed crack head, i actually went bck to reload my ak-47lol,,,its these hormones, they av turned me into a vicious lil bitch, but hey who am i kidding blamin the hormones lol

Its perfectly normal 2 feel the way you do, mostly if wat u enjoyd most was just d sew. The mere tot of som1 else taking ur spot kills u. Just try not to reflect on it much.

Vivalavida-u r funny girl. @ Izeek- I try not to reflect on it but sometimes, it just pops to my head, n it kills me but I guess such is life.He also had people b4 me so I guess they would have also felt d same way

Wow! Thot i was de only one havin dis kinda thots. Why it kills me is cos of de simple fact dat she's de 1st gal i eva fell in love wit. At a point in ma life, i felt shagging diff gals wil help me get off dat feelin, which i did, and had no results.
What helped me was de act of lettin go, I learnt to accept things de way there appeared: now i'm free.
If she likes, let ha shag from morning til night, i won't give a hoot.
I'm livin my life at an unspeakable ease now!

@Hollysmile, it has been so long and thut I had let go but I guess I would one day reach d level u r, 1 day think about it nd laugh.

Funny, gal! Did i hear u say de level i am?
Anyways, it's just a thing of maturity, How old ar u if i may ask? And how long has dis incidence been?
Mine took me a couple of yrs, 2yrs precisely.

@ Hollysmile, Yes now, ur level lol. Going to about a year nd I'm not yet 25.

hi, I understand how u feel, i just experienced something like dat a couple of months ago. Something the thought just come even if u try hard to forget it. check "My Story" just dont talk about it too much. talk it out wit partner

@monicaa, what a young damsel u ar! Why u stressin ur soul? Apply my principle, Lettin go!
Anyways, it's part of what we, once in a life time (tho some pple xperience it twice or more), experience.
My prayer 4u (tho i'm no preacher) is dat u don't let it affect ur psychology.

@poster: was he ur 1st?

@Poster:

People like u smother your partner with too much insecurity while you're dating, imagine feeling like that after a relationship then u imagine how that relationship must've been!

Hey girl it is natural,
so just forget him and know that he is long gone.,
by the way what is ur stress

@Hollysmile- Amen 2 dat. @biola44- yes he was my first but I certainly wasn't his first girl but 1st virgin. @whitelexi- did u say smother? Mayb now I wish I did, some1 dat cheated on me about how many times but used d same mouth when I gave him my virginity promising with such, he won't look outside nd all.

@Bighead-mayb my stress is I feel I was cheated big time

@monicaa, dis too shall pass

Writing is my therphy.

I wrote and cried and wrote some more.

have you properly greaved or did you just give yourself the "I am too big to cry over him" speach.

If you have not properly greaved then now is not too late.

sistawoman:

Writing is my therphy.

I wrote and cried and wrote some more.

have you properly greaved or did you just give yourself the "I am too big to cry over him" speach.

If you have not properly greaved then now is not too late.

You know, i always thought u were over-emotional with your posts - whats with the grieving over someone who's not dead. . .  or do u wish him dead? Damn, thats malicious pls!

a loss of a r/s is a loss

a person does not have to die for you to greave for them or mourn thier loss.

When you love someone and that person detrays you, you hurt and mourn thier loss.
If not you take those bags with you to the next r/s.

Greaving and mourning the person they presented themselves to be is a way to shead and unpack your bags and move on

@Sistawoman:

Point made.

You are upset when a relationship breaks down.

You grieve when someone dies.

There is absolutely no inter-relation between those 2 words. . . . Simples!

whitelexi:

@Sistawoman:

Point made.

You are upset when a relationship breaks down.

You grieve when someone dies.

There is absolutely no inter-relation between those 2 words. . . . Simples!

here is what Webster says:

Main Entry: grieve
Pronunciation: \ˈgrēv\
Function: verb
Inflected Form(s): grieved; griev·ing
Etymology: Middle English greven, from Anglo-French grever, from Latin gravare to burden, from gravis heavy, grave; akin to Greek barys heavy, Sanskrit guru
Date: 13th century
transitive verb
1 : to cause to suffer : distress <it grieves me to see him this way>
2 : to feel or show grief over <grieving the death of her son>
3 : to submit a formal grievance concerning <grieve a dismissal>
intransitive verb
: to feel grief : sorrow
— griev·er noun


I believe I used the right word.

Just because you move heartlessly in and out of r/s does not mean that we all do.

@ Poster,

I used to feel that way before. Then I got over it. Give it time, you'll get over it. Sometimes in a weak moment I think about it, but it dosent hurt like it used to!!

Does it ever cross Your mind that someone prolly musta
tasted that 'fruit' before You?
Me think You aren't over him yet. . . .

sistawoman:


here is what Webster says:

Main Entry: grieve
Pronunciation: \ˈgrēv\
Function: verb
Inflected Form(s): grieved; griev·ing
Etymology: Middle English greven, from Anglo-French grever, from Latin gravare to burden, from gravis heavy, grave; akin to Greek barys heavy, Sanskrit guru
Date: 13th century
transitive verb
1 : to cause to suffer : distress <it grieves me to see him this way>
2 : to feel or show grief over <grieving the death of her son>
3 : to submit a formal grievance concerning <grieve a dismissal>
intransitive verb
: to feel grief : sorrow
— griev·er noun


I believe I used the right word.

Just because you move heartlessly in and out of r/s does not mean that we all do.

Wrong, i dont move heartlessly in and out of relationships, i move on and try not to grieve or mourn like u do. . .  Surely u wont discriminate against that now, would u?

Just because u had to mourn the guys u dated does not mean we must all be that heartless!

And i still think u r wrong with the grammar, u dont mourn someone when they're still alive - except [like no.1 states] they're better off dead than in the state u find them. There is a difference between mourning and hurting or being upset, grieving or mourning are too powerful to be used in the context of a mere relationship gone sour. . .  Pls!

To mourn as presented by Webster.com



Main Entry: mourn
Pronunciation: \ˈmȯrn\
Function: verb
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English murnan; akin to Old High German mornēn to mourn, Greek mermēra care — more at memory
Date: before 12th century
intransitive verb
1: to feel or express grief or sorrow
2: to show the customary signs of grief for a death ; especially : to wear mourning
3: to murmur mournfully —used especially of doves
transitive verb
1: to feel or express grief or sorrow for
2: to utter mournfully
— mourn·er noun
— mourn·ing·ly \ˈmȯr-niŋ-lē\ adverb


again mourning and grieving are both approaite when you deeply love a person and still love them when the r/s ends.
I dont mourn or grieve for every ex only happend once.

sistawoman:

To mourn as presented by Webster.com



Main Entry: mourn
Pronunciation: \ˈmȯrn\
Function: verb
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English murnan; akin to Old High German mornēn to mourn, Greek mermēra care — more at memory
Date: before 12th century
intransitive verb
1: to feel or express grief or sorrow
2: to show the customary signs of grief for a death ; especially : to wear mourning
3: to murmur mournfully —used especially of doves
transitive verb
1: to feel or express grief or sorrow for
2: to utter mournfully
— mourn·er noun
— mourn·ing·ly \ˈmȯr-niŋ-lē\ adverb


again mourning and grieving are both approaite when you deeply love a person and still love them when the r/s ends.
I dont mourn or grieve for every ex only happend once.

Yet again, i implore u, stop showing off your low level of reasoning here. Websters and oxford and all the dictionaries u quote will define the word "Grieve" in different contexts but absolutely none of these contexts suits what you're trying to use the word to represent. I have no problem with the definition, i however do have a problem with the context u have used these words in.

Allow me school u:

All the examples above go in line with what i've been saying to u, how can u express grief or sorrow when heartbroken? u express those when someone dies, but u r upset or hurt when heartbroken - irrespective of how deeply or emotional. Is it clearer now?