Please we need to talk. It gonna help you.

Ornate1:
[quote author=ourchoice post=42335669]why do u need a relationship when u are not ready to indulge in what comes with relationship with the opposite sex? Is there anywhere Bible said u must have a boyfriend

If u know u aren't ready to give what relationship demands, then forget about keeping a boyfriend and face your life alone!

If I may ask, what will u give to the guy u will be dating in exchange for his gifts, calls, pampering, etc? I am sure nothing but forming his girlfriend with rules and laws!

Why are women so selfish and wicked? U want to collect but u don't want to give!

It is simple, avoid relationship and pray for your husband to come soon.

Any guy that tells u that he will date u, stay committed to u, be assisting u, calling u happily as his girlfriend and not expect or demand sex from u is a big liar! He will only pretend while having sex with some other girls behind u and fooling u with sweet words of how he doesn't care about sex.

Any guy ready to accept no sex relationship won't need a girlfriend in the first place....so to say, such guys don't date!

You too shouldn't date! Stay on your own if u truly want to please God!

Ever since I decided not to indulge in sex outside marriage, I don't keep girlfriends....i don't woo girls....i stay on my own....i don't expect any girl to call me, text me, buy me gift or worry me...I am facing my life alone.

But u ladies want to have a boyfriend that will be spending on u, giving u money, taking u out, calling u always, doing this and that for u and at the end u don't give him anything in return, why? Is he your brother? Is he your father? Is he your cousin? Why must he be spending on u and not expect anything in return? What if after wasting his time and resources on u and u decide to leave him to marry another man, what will be his consolation?


The problem is it seems most ladies are selfish and greedy; they only think about what they want and don't care about what the man in their life want. Selfishness and greed are big sins too....flee from them. be yourself and stop dating if u want to be a true virgin in the sight of God.Well, there's really no need for the harsh undertones, alright? constructive criticism is always the best. That aside,

1) Now, the bible may have never spoken about dating, however, I won't be wrong if I tell you it existed, in the christain world, we call it courtship.

Jacob courted (or dated) racheal for seven years before marriage. Gen 29,18-30, though it wasn't that rampant then, However that's one example for you.

Your over-emphasis on the word "live your life alone" is not needed.

You avoid relationships because you don't want to have sex, well there's something called self control, i believe.

Instead of staying alone, it's always best to be on the lookout for someone who has the same beliefs as you, just as most nairalanders has already said ( unfortunately they are few) so this where your "pray for your own husband to come soon" comes into play, and thanks for this part though, am already doing that. Mind you when he comes, he is still going to be a tagged boyfriend first in this our 21st century society(since that's what they calls a man you are in a relationship with) before he becomes a husband.

"You ladies" why generalizing, huh?

I always took my exes out on their birthdays, bought gifts every now and then too, and whenever we eat out, we always go dutch, and never was it a one-sided relationship. This is just who I am as a person ,I always make it a habit to reciprocate whatever favors I get , when dealing with people in general. I know there's no free thing in Freetown and people will always expect a payback for every good deed rendered.

Can I buy him clothes?, can I buy him a car?, can I give him some money?,. Really?, the same materialism you feel the female gender exudes, is exactly the same thing you are vying for.

What about you say, can I help him to build his dream?, can I help me to achieve his goals?, can I be there for him in time of lack?, support him?, pray for him?, encourage and motivate him?, I think this sounds better.

There more to a guy than what he gives, and more to a lady, than her body she's expected to offer as compensation, and if they don't see that , their loss.

Have a good day

My sister, I adore your stand on this and the way u took out time to address all my initial points.

As for the Jacob and Racheal issue, they didn't court per se, Jacob was a servant to Rachels father; Laban...he fell in love with her while serving her father, so it's not courting. Jacob only wanted to serve Laban in exchange for his daughter, Rachel.

Meanwhile, if truly u can help a man achieve his life's dreams, goals, and u do all the things u mentioned without just turning the guy a spending maga....without demanding and expecting the guy to buy this, buy u that, take u here, take u there....then u can find a man that will be your male friend without asking u for sex.

But if u want a full time boyfriend that will be spending on u, buying u gifts, sponsoring dates, and all that comes with full dating, then be ready to offer him sex in return or else, it won't be possible to find such man.

I know many guys come online to lie and form they can cope in no sex relationship and still claim to love, care and stay faithful to u...pls don't be fooled by those guys...face reality my sister...any mature, sexually active guy ready to have a girlfriend will never agree to no sex till marriage, unless u are just his side chick and he has some other girl(s) satisfying his intimate needs without your knowledge.

You are a lady and not a guy, guys have a libido higher than that of average lady out there...so be real and use your wisdom.

Miriam19:
Can't comprehend either..... Men and sex are like 5&6

nice name tho

why do i feel like you shouldnt have brought this to the public


just keep urself...GOD hardly fails virgins talking from experience

mimopel:
why do i feel like you shouldnt have brought this to the public


just keep urself...GOD hardly fails virgins talking from experience

There are no real virgins above 19yrs in the world

Which virgin? The so-called virgin that kiss, romance, su*ck, engage in oral se*x, engage in anal s*ex, handle, mastur*bate and just preserve her hymen to deceive gullible-men who still crave to marry fake virgin with rotten heart and soul.

God alone knows the true virgins and true virgins don't date or keep boyfriend...go to Deeper Life....

ourchoice:
There are no real virgins above 19yrs in the world

Which virgin? The so-called virgin that kiss, romance, su*ck, engage in oral se*x, engage in anal s*ex, handle, mastur*bate and just preserve her hymen to deceive gullible-men who still crave to marry fake virgin with rotten heart and soul.

God alone knows the true virgins and true virgins don't date or keep boyfriend...go to Deeper Life....

#smiles#...reason am not offended is because u are not exposed.....i dont cum to talk abt my sexual purity or promoscuity on public forums but i would hav used myself to clear ur doubt, who says there are no virgins who havnt involve in any form of sexual activity, have even seen 3 laides they are even in their late twenties so wat are we saying here. virginity is not abt church it about personality and beliefs....people go into sex by blood or by infleuence...one can have a strong christian foundation and spiritual support nd decides to to taunt their destinies for two minutes pleasure. dey can remain virgins even @ 25?....besides sex is not worth the hype and stress. there are so many other things in life we are meant to channel our energy to, the gospel. GOD"s work, ministry, visions, talent and not SEX!! for crying out loud. nobody have sex for one day stretch....because wat good fruit has pre marital sex brought to our society. get busy man with other tinz

mimopel:



#smiles#...reason am not offended is because u are not exposed.....i dont cum to talk abt my sexual purity or promoscuity on public forums but i would hav used myself to clear ur doubt, who says there are no virgins who havnt involve in any form of sexual activity, have even seen 3 laides they are even in their late twenties so wat are we saying here. virginity is not abt church it about personality and beliefs....people go into sex by blood or by infleuence...one can have a strong christian foundation and spiritual support nd decides to to taunt their destinies for two minutes pleasure. dey can remain virgins even @ 25?....besides sex is not worth the hype and stress. there are so many other things in life we are meant to channel our energy to, the gospel. GOD"s work, ministry, visions, talent and not SEX!! for crying out loud. nobody have sex for one day stretch....because wat good fruit has pre marital sex brought to our society. get busy man with other tinz

agreed! So tell me y u need a boyfriend? Why do u need a boyfriend when u can channel the energy into the things u mentioned? You need boyfriend to foot your bills for free right? Isn't that selfishness and sin?

As far as I am concerned, there are no Godly virgin above 18yrs....only God knows the true virgins....i don't believe in virgins because it's a scam

Ladies that call themselves virgin do worse than non-virgins; we don't need to argue it...you know yourself...its between u and your God, don't convince me because I don't believe there are true virgins. if u are, God alone knows and will reward u...if u are not, it's bw u and your God and conscience, don't sweat it sis

You man is coming dear....Keep the faith nd don't fall to temptation

ourchoice:
agreed! So tell me y u need a boyfriend? Why do u need a boyfriend when u can channel the energy into the things u mentioned? You need boyfriend to foot your bills for free right? Isn't that selfishness and sin?

As far as I am concerned, there are no Godly virgin above 18yrs....only God knows the true virgins....i don't believe in virgins because it's a scam

Ladies that call themselves virgin do worse than non-virgins; we don't need to argue it...you know yourself...its between u and your God, don't convince me because I don't believe there are true virgins. if u are, God alone knows and will reward u...if u are not, it's bw u and your God and conscience, don't sweat it sis

no more arguement abt virgin or non virgin thing...but one question for u bro...why do u need a wife??

What kind of virgin are you? The biological one that still has her hymen intact or the bible own that have not thought of dirty thing? Any way but if you can't abstain then marry. There are ladies of your age who are married. That's the wisest counsel I can give.
There are many ladies of your age like you who are virgin and are still facing same temptation. some will fall and some will overcome but only you can decide your fate.
I as a person to be sincere with you will love to marry a virgin girl.

mimopel:



no more arguement abt virgin or non virgin thing...but one question for u bro...why do u need a wife??

1. For procreation 2. For companionship if she's willing to be a good companion

Meanwhile, wife is different from girlfriend....and boyfriend is different from husband.

ourchoice:
1. For procreation 2. For companionship if she's willing to be a good companion

Meanwhile, wife is different from girlfriend....and boyfriend is different from husband.

dont stess ur ans jst ans straight up. how do u get the wife

mimopel:



dont stess ur ans jst ans straight up. how do u get the wife

God will decide!

Dating is not advisable for
Born Again Bible Believing Christians; it only leads
to sin, which dishonors God, then God doesn’t bless
the union. This ends up causing long term issues in
the marriage by blurring the lines between lust and
love.
Once lust and the physical aspect has already been
introduced in the relationship, the waters are
muddied and both parties cannot see or think
clearly. This is also a warning sign that the
relationship is not God ordained.
If only one of you is ready to get married, then you
are incompatible and shouldn’t date. This also
turns into recreational dating for the one who isn’t
ready to marry and a big waste of time for the one
who is ready to marry. When an individual is ready
for marriage after spending quality time with God in
worship, sanctification, and service, nothing pleases
Him more than to bring a suitable mate for that
individual in the covenant of Marriage.

Who brought me back here?

OP, how far na?