It is an open secret that in recent times,many partners have taken to killing,defacing their spouses with acid and all sorts of violence stemming from an unhealthy lack of control of emotions and extreme jealousy. We would recall the ronke shonde case, or is it the woman whose throat was slit by her husband because she was the breadwinner which made him very insecure?The case of the lawyer in Ibadan who stabbed her husband to death also comes to mind.
I am no relationship or marriage counsellor,but i know that an extremely possessive partner can be a potentially dangerous person in future. Most times,we all get carried away by the fact that they love hard "the extra questions to know who called you,who you were seen with etc We get carried away because it is admittedly very flattering to have someone love us so fiercely,that he or she cannot bear the thought of losing you to another.We see the signs during dating; but dismiss it as deep love!
I want to implore everyone who is yet to be married to shine their eyes very well before entering into the union of marriage.. A client once advised me and i quote him " pls look and pray well before you marry,don't rush because your mates are all married,you don't rush to a place you intend staying all your life".
Today, i would have received the news that my friend was murdered by his wife. How so ?Let me tell you a brief history of their relationship.They got married in March 2015 after having dated for more than 3 yrs.She has always been hot tempered. I can recall how she hunted girls she suspected he was dating to beat them up with a warning to stay away from her boyfriend.On two occasions,she smashed his phone to pieces because she was suspecting him of cheating on her.I visited them in 2014 and personally witnessed how she emptied a plate of hot rice on my friend's head because he said he wasn't hungry yet.The quarrels were getting too much so he broke up with her for like 2 months to avoid being pushed to hitting her someday.During that period, her mother kept on calling my friend to take her back,that she doesn't eat,locks herself up in her dark room and was in a state of severe depression. She affirmed that her daughter would never behave badly again as she had learnt her lesson.
My friend,(a.k.a Mr stupid in love) took her back. They got married and her madness continued.I hadn't heard from him in a while now because we had a fight about her attitude. I warned him about marrying her,he refused. He told me at 34 most of his mates are married,the devil he knows is better,where would he start building another relationship from? etc to justify his marriage to her.I had to let him be and hope for the best in their union.I was shocked when i saw 18 missed calls from him today.I called back he was crying saying "thank God for me,i would have been a dead man". What happened was that last night, he had a company meeting that was slated to finish by 8pm so he called his wife to tell her abt it.They finished and it was raining heavily.On his way home,he assisted a lady who flagged him down for a lift.He had to go past his house junction to drop her off at her place.While she was in d car the wife called and during d call,the phone of the lady started ringing.The wife asked who was in the car with him and my friend said its someone he is giving a lift.She started asking diff questions showing thatbshe was getting paranoid and suspects it was his mistress.My friend said he was getting pissed and told her they would talk at home,that he needed to focus on his driving since it was raining. He said she called back like 4 times, he didn't pick up because he already knew she was going to be dramatic.
He got home and met her really furious,abusing him and laying all sorts of accusations alleging unfaithfulness.He explained everything, yet she insisted that he was a bloody cheat and liar. He then stepped out to take a walk,to cool off and let her anger subside.He left d house and decided to stroll around their estate.He had just walked a few blocks and was lost in thought when a man walking on the other side of d road shouted " oga! Comot road o".He looked back and saw that his wife's car was on high speed, and clearly determined to hit him.He ran off d road to stand close to the fence of a house still im shock.She came down from d car and walked to him saying "Na that man save u o,i for jam u die..Since u cant stay with me alone, at least wen u die those ur girlfriends will rest na."
My friend was stunned,she even went on to say "na me go kill u o,as u say u cannot leave the women outside". She left him there and drove off. He said he called a friend that lives some streets away to come pick him up and he slept at the friend's place till this morning. He can't even go back to their home because he is scared and doesn't doubt that she can kill him.I asked him,"so which yeye love made u marry her and still stayed till now knowing she is very hot tempered and violent?It took this near-death experience to wake him from his deep slumber.His younger brother with a spare key who lives with him occasionally was sent to go get some of his clothes and other vital belongings.He said he met d wife crying,that they should help her beg her husband,that she loves him very much thats why she acts paranoid.
Pls nairalanders, pray and look well before you end up with a partner that would be the cause of your untimely demise from this world.My friend learned d hard way and is getting ready to rent a place and cut all ties from her.I told him "God prevented her from hitting you,to teach you a lesson and open your eyes".Nobody should even hesitate to leave an abusive partner,your safety and peace of mind should come first.You may not be lucky to come out of it alive.A word is enough for the wise.People must talk,but na who dey alive dey even hear wetin people talk o.

Na why I just like myself..


To dump such ladies dnt hard me.

This is an eye-opener

Cutehector:
This is an eye-opener

Many others would still make this grave mistake,we never really learn until it may be too late.

queenfav:
Many others would still make this grave mistake,we never really learn until it may be too late.

the one dats surprising me is the "female beater"

U hear of cases where the lady will say, he slapped me once before we got married but I later forgave him because he cried and begged for my forgiveness...



It's just laughable

he better run infact flee from that lady she's mentally unstable and thank God no kids yet tell your guy to run away from her oo Chineke m ee

Cutehector:
the one dats surprising me is the "female beater"

U hear of cases where the lady will say, he slapped me once before we got married but I later forgave him because he cried and begged for my forgiveness...



It's just laughable

You can't blame them,many persons can't be alone. The need to be in a relationship (no matter how toxic and abusive), is so strong in most persons. They would rather stay put in a clearly bad situation just to say "i have someone". I thank God that when push comes to shove,there is nothing or no one i can't walk away from.I love myself like that o,i would choose me (my emotional well being and happiness) over and over again.

For the sake of his mother, and his other loved ones he should just start divorce proceedings from his friend's house.
He should just get small money and rent another place, and when she's at work, he should go park his personal belongings from his house.
Life is too short to spend it with a mad person abeg.

queenfav:
You can't blame them,many person cant be alone. The need to be in a relationship (no matter how toxic and abusive), is so strong in most persons. They would rather stay put in a clearly bad situation just to say "i have someone". I thank God that when push comes to shove,there is nothing or no one i can't walk away from.I love myself like that o,i would choose me (my emotional well being and happiness) and over again.

dats very surprising I must say.. and it really baffles me. Sometimes I ask myself why. U just see a lady get out of an abusive relationship, the same person who vowed will neva hav anythn to do wit a boyfrnd again, will still, just after a month, be rolling out wit another guy... den u as the friend who constantly advices her will just be like, "smh" sometimes I wonder if a lady can stay single for just one year... no dates, no flings, nothing.

Only if pple will learn.. I go share my experience later...Make I close first...

Cutehector:
dats very surprising I must say.. and it really baffles me. Sometimes I ask myself why. U just see a lady get out of an abusive relationship, the same person who vowed will neva hav anythn to do wit a boyfrnd again, will still, just after a month, be rolling out wit another guy... den u as the friend who constantly advices her will just be like, "smh" sometimes I wonder if a lady can stay single for just one year... no dates, no flings, nothing.

lol,its not so easy jare.In most cases,we ladies go into another relationship so soon just to help get over the ex.It works actually sha.How would you be pinning for a lost lover when you are occupied with another?.Ideally,a person ought to allow him/herself to be fully healed of all the emotional and psychological truama the last relationship caused.But again, some failed relationships are capable of hunting you emotionally till the day you die.There is just no amount of time that could rid a person of d experience and memories (good or bad),so why waste time?The odds are the other party may have moved on to a new relationship ages ago,so we just try to move on by being with someone new.

queenfav:
lol,its not so easy jare.In most cases,we ladies go into another relationship so soon just to help get over the ex.It works actually sha.How would you be pinning for a lost lover when you are occupied with another?.Ideally,a person ought to allow him/herself to be fully healed of all the emotional and psychological truama the last relationship caused.But again, some failed relationships are capable of hunting you emotionally till the day you die.There is just no amount of time that could rid a person of d experience and memories (good or bad),so why waste time?The odds are the other party may have moved on to a new relationship ages ago,so we just try to move on by being with someone new.

lol there is one quote abt women I read somewhere. It says. There are two things in life dat can't be predicted. The weather, and of course women.

Now let's narrow this down to me, I find myself meeting ladies who hav been in abusive relationships. I really just duno why. Den they keep me in d dark, like i'd just hav ta wait and wait and wait till she gets over her ex.. people hav told me to change my circle of female friends.. which i'm doing, but the new lady I just meet, must hav an awful story about an ex.. is it just dat hard to meet people who really didn't hav abusive relationships in d past at all? Or are they just faking it in the name of "forming hard ta get"


What happend to the notion whereby ladies say if they really like a guy, den wats d point of keeping him in d dark.

Wow the female version got chills while reading this, not surprised had a friend who dated soemone like this.

Cutehector:
lol there is one quote abt women I read somewhere. It says. There are two things in life dat can't be predicted. The weather, and of course women.

Now let's narrow this down to me, I find myself meeting ladies who hav been in abusive relationships. I really just duno why. Den they keep me in d dark, like i'd just hav ta wait and wait and wait till she gets over her ex.. people hav told me to change my circle of female friends.. which i'm doing, but the new lady I just meet, must hav an awful story about an ex.. is it just dat hard to meet people who really didn't hav abusive relationships in d past at all? Or are they just faking it in the name of "forming hard ta get"


What happend to the notion whereby ladies say if they really like a guy, den wats d point of keeping him in d dark.

My dear, almost every lady has a sad story to tell about her experience with men she dated in the past.However,some lie about it or grossly exaggerate the facts to score some sympathy points, and to maybe ensure you treat her well.A lady makes a guy wait not just because she is forming hard to get,she just wants to be careful so as not to get hurt again.Just be patient, if there's any you really like,she would eventually say yes to you someday when she is good and ready to date again.

queenfav:
My dear, almost every lady has a sad story to tell about her experience with men she dated in the past.However,some lie about it or grossly exaggerate the facts to score some sympathy points, and to maybe ensure you treat her well.A lady makes a guy wait not just because she is forming hard to get,she just wants to be careful so as not to get hurt again.Just be patient, if there's any you really like,she would eventually say yes to you someday when she is good and ready to date again.

i'll try this time

For the sake of his mother, and his other loved ones he should just start divorce proceedings from his friend's house.
He should just get small money and rent another place, and when she's at work, he should go park his personal belongings from his house.
Life is too short to spend it with someone who's crazy. He can also involve the police now, and once he starts the divorce proceedings . Let them have it on record that she's attempted to kill him before o.

Nobody should even hesitate to leave an abusive partner,your safety and peace of mind should come first.You may not be lucky to come out of it alive.A word is enough for the wise.People must talk,but na who dey alive dey even hear wetin people talk o.

Exactly. True talk.

queenfav:
It is an open secret that in recent times,many partners have taken to killing,defacing their spouses with acid and all sorts of violence stemming from an unhealthy lack of control of emotions and extreme jealousy. We would recall the ronke shonde case, or is it the woman whose throat was slit by her husband because she was the breadwinner which made him very insecure?The case of the lawyer in Ibadan who stabbed her husband to death also comes to mind.
I am no relationship or marriage counsellor,but i know that an extremely possessive partner can be a potentially dangerous person in future. Most times,we all get carried away by the fact that they love hard "the extra questions to know who called you,who you were seen with etc We get carried away because it is admittedly very flattering to have someone love us so fiercely,that he or she cannot bear the thought of losing you to another.We see the signs during dating; but dismiss it as deep love!
I want to implore everyone who is yet to be married to shine their eyes very well before entering into the union of marriage.. A client once advised me and i quote him " pls look and pray well before you marry,don't rush because your mates are all married,you don't rush to a place you intend staying all your life".
Today, i would have received the news that my friend was murdered by his wife. How so ?Let me tell you a brief history of their relationship.They got married in March 2015 after having dated for more than 3 yrs.She has always been hot tempered. I can recall how she hunted girls she suspected he was dating to beat them up with a warning to stay away from her boyfriend.On two occasions,she smashed his phone to pieces because she was suspecting him of cheating on her.I visited them in 2014 and personally witnessed how she emptied a plate of hot rice on my friend's head because he said he wasn't hungry yet.The quarrels were getting too much so he broke up with her for like 2 months to avoid being pushed to hitting her someday.During that period, her mother kept on calling my friend to take her back,that she doesn't eat,locks herself up in her dark room and was in a state of severe depression. She affirmed that her daughter would never behave badly again as she had learnt her lesson.
My friend,(a.k.a Mr stupid in love) took her back. They got married and her madness continued.I hadn't heard from him in a while now because we had a fight about her attitude. I warned him about marrying her,he refused. He told me at 34 most of his mates are married,the devil he knows is better,where would he start building another relationship from? etc to justify his marriage to her.I had to let him be and hope for the best in their union.I was shocked when i saw 18 missed calls from him today.I called back he was crying saying "thank God for me,i would have been a dead man". What happened was that last night, he had a company meeting that was slated to finish by 8pm so he called his wife to tell her abt it.They finished and it was raining heavily.On his way home,he assisted a lady who flagged him down for a lift.He had to go past his house junction to drop her off at her place.While she was in d car the wife called and during d call,the phone of the lady started ringing.The wife asked who was in the car with him and my friend said its someone he is giving a lift.She started asking diff questions showing thatbshe was getting paranoid and suspects it was his mistress.My friend said he was getting pissed and told her they would talk at home,that he needed to focus on his driving since it was raining. He said she called back like 4 times, he didn't pick up because he already knew she was going to be dramatic.
He got home and met her really furious,abusing him and laying all sorts of accusations alleging unfaithfulness.He explained everything, yet she insisted that he was a bloody cheat and liar. He then stepped out to take a walk,to cool off and let her anger subside.He left d house and decided to stroll around their estate.He had just walked a few blocks and was lost in thought when a man walking on the other side of d road shouted " oga! Comot road o".He looked back and saw that his wife's car was on high speed, and clearly determined to hit him.He ran off d road to stand close to the fence of a house still im shock.She came down from d car and walked to him saying "Na that man save u o,i for jam u die..Since u cant stay with me alone, at least wen u die those ur girlfriends will rest na."
My friend was stunned,she even went on to say "na me go kill u o,as u say u cannot leave the women outside". She left him there and drove off. He said he called a friend that lives some streets away to come pick him up and he slept at the friend's place till this morning. He can't even go back to their home because he is scared and doesn't doubt that she can kill him.I asked him,"so which yeye love made u marry her and still stayed till now knowing she is very hot tempered and violent?It took this near-death experience to wake him from his deep slumber.His younger brother with a spare key who lives with him occasionally was sent to go get some of his clothes and other vital belongings.He said he met d wife crying,that they should help her beg her husband,that she loves him very much thats why she acts paranoid.
Pls nairalanders, pray and look well before you end up with a partner that would be the cause of your untimely demise from this world.My friend learned d hard way and is getting ready to rent a place and cut all ties from her.I told him "God prevented her from hitting you,to teach you a lesson and open your eyes".Nobody should even hesitate to leave an abusive partner,your safety and peace of mind should come first.You may not be lucky to come out of it alive.A word is enough for the wise.People must talk,but na who dey alive dey even hear wetin people talk o.

I dated a Lady which got those abusive traits in her. The day she showed me one, i thought i was dreaming. She almost broke the TV and Laptop. Though, she later begged and cried to forgive her. I forgave her but can't forget. I jejely work out because i don't have such mentality beating a woman. Till now, she begged and begged. I told her, i just want a peaceful my life. I never marry you, you are performing drama Like this, the day i marry you, i should start digging my grave myself. i can't kill myself because i can't become Romeo version 2.0. I sharpely move on. Life to short to attach yourself with someone you can't control or understand each other.

Cutehector:
Na why I just like myself..


To dump such ladies dnt hard me.

Ur still a child,sometimes it takes maturity not to comment on posts u know nothing about.

Abusive and violent people are dangerous,stay off them. That ur friend is wise. If he had gone back home that night, the story would have been different by now.

Amhappy:
Abusive and violent people are dangerous,stay off them. That ur friend is wise. If he had gone back home that night, the story would have been different by now.

My dear,God just ordered his steps that night, cos d mumu love he had for her would av led him home on a normal day.