My son(almost 4yrs) is in the reception class. He doesn't respond to teachings at school, doesn't talk or play. This is the exact opposite at home. Plays very well at home, sings and talks about all he's taught in the school. He responds very well to the teachings of his home teacher. His teacher in school is saying he will repeat class 'cos there is nothing to show he's learnt things. What do I do? Teachers, educators and Co, ur help is needed pls.

Jst charge school first frm dia we will tell u wat to do

It seems your child gets intimidated at school.it could be the teacher.

maybe u shd change his school.take him round&ask if he likes any school.then talk to d teacher abt d problem.seek a standard sch wt qualified teachers.

Is this a new development?
Does your son have only one teacher?
If not, is this attitude displayed only to a particular teacher.

Problem might be teacher-related, assuming the boy is is not new in the school
You need to gain the confidence of your son and interview him closely.
Maybe take him out and buy him ice cream, then "attack."

This is one area that makes me like Nigeria...Even a kid that has bearly came out of the womb is already in school and has gotten already worried parent concerned that he has not started learning calculus.....

Please slow down a bit sir...He is three....Maybe he does not like the teacher, or the school..I can't talk about bullying because they are under the watchful eyes of their teachers....

Just ask him if he wants u to change the school for him.....I know he will say yes.. but put it under consideration...As i said before, I suggest u slow down a bit on him please and let him be a kid a little

Please do not change his school it will not help. Talk to your son and encourage him.promise him you will get him that thing he so much desires, maybe a toy, but on the condition that he reads or answer his teacher in school.
Keep encouraging him and always enquire from him if he answered his teacher or read in class every day. My son was not given report sheet for last term but you can't try him now. He can count 1_50 correctly, write 1_ 30 on his own read and write A_Z. All by himself. He is 3years and some months.The same method worked for him.Above all pray for him.best of luck.

Is either the teacher is abusing ur son or his mates
It could be verbal abuse, hitting, or telling his class mates to like telling him
"Shame. Shame."
And many more that make him lose interest in school activities.

Please talk to ur son.

If he always feel reluctant to go to school my dear it a sign.

ihutuluv:
Please do not change his school it will not help. Talk to your son and encourage him.promise him you will get him that thing he so much desires, maybe a toy, but on the condition that he reads or answer his teacher in school.
Keep encouraging him and always enquire from him if he answered his teacher or read in class every day. My son was not given report sheet for last term but you can't try him now. He can count 1_50 correctly, write 1_ 30 on his own read and write A_Z. All by himself. He is 3years and some months.The same method worked for him.Above all pray for him.best of luck.

this will do for u sir, if he still behaves the same way in his neew sch, will you still attamept to change another school sir?,he seem to be too comfortable at home hence dosent wanna adjust to the new found life outside home, just some Lil patience and talking...it will sure do d required magic.

thorpido:
It seems your child gets intimidated at school.it could be the teacher.

This is exactly what I told his home teacher after I got home. She told me there was nothing like that... really confused.

Mafio:
Is either the teacher is abusing ur son or his mates
It could be verbal abuse, hitting, or telling his class mates to like telling him
"Shame. Shame."
And many more that make him lose interest in school activities.

Please talk to ur son.

If he always feel reluctant to go to school my dear it a sign.

He doesn't feel reluctant at all. Very eager to go to school. This is one more reason I'm confused about the whole thing.

Richy4:
This is one area that makes me like Nigeria...Even a kid that has bearly came out of the womb is already in school and has gotten already worried parent concerned that he has not started learning calculus.....

Please slow down a bit sir...He is three....Maybe he does not like the teacher, or the school..I can't talk about bullying because they are under the watchful eyes of their teachers....

Just ask him if he wants u to change the school for him.....I know he will say yes.. but put it under consideration...As i said before, I suggest u slow down a bit on him please and let him be a kid a little

I like ur sense of humour and ur advice. My concern is I've seen what my in-law's child of his age and others can do both at home and school. Anyway, ur advice is soothing. Thanks so much

Op!op!op!...how many times i call you..your son reminds me of "me" when i was a child.the environment in his class does not suit his learnin.it could be either from his teacher or his mates.but most likely from his teachers..the best thing to do is to change his school..

ihutuluv:
Please do not change his school it will not help. Talk to your son and encourage him.promise him you will get him that thing he so much desires, maybe a toy, but on the condition that he reads or answer his teacher in school.
Keep encouraging him and always enquire from him if he answered his teacher or read in class every day. My son was not given report sheet for last term but you can't try him now. He can count 1_50 correctly, write 1_ 30 on his own read and write A_Z. All by himself. He is 3years and some months.The same method worked for him.Above all pray for him.best of luck.

Thanks for ur advice. I will put it to use

general111:
Op!op!op!...how many times i call you..your son reminds me of "me" when i was a child.the environment in his class does not suit his learnin.it could be either from his teacher or his mates.but most likely from his teachers..the best thing to do is to change his school..

Hmmmmmmnnn........the teacher might be the issue. Anyway, I'm seeing the school head tomorrow.

Seeing the school head might not change anything because they tend to cover for each other.

The best thing to do is try to coax the truth out of your son. If all fails, install a spy camera (or place voice recorder) in his bag or pockets.

From the info you provided, the problem is from the school. If you are unable to find out the truth, please change his school. If the behavior persists, then see a child psychologist or behavioral therapist.

Omotakins:
Hmmmmmmnnn........the teacher might be the issue. Anyway, I'm seeing the school head tomorrow.

Double post.

Neverquit:
Double post.

yeah, posted it in education section, too. Trying to get pieces of advice I can work and grapple with

Neverquit:
Seeing the school head might not change anything because they tend to cover for each other.

The best thing to do is try to coax the truth out of your son. If all fails, install a spy camera (or place voice recorder) in his bag or pockets.

From the info you provided, the problem is from the school. If you are unable to find out the truth, please change his school. If the behavior persists, then see a child psychologist or behavioral therapist.

Let me see how meeting the school head pans out.... thanks for ur advice

hello,
My little niece also does the same thing..her teacher complains that she never responds to teaching but Tolu is hype active at home.She is just 5years old and we have changed her school about 4 times already (a British n Indian school inclusive) Changing his school might not help
what i wud advice is you get closer to him and find out the student in his class he plays with often,try encourage the friendship and make them learn together at home, they wud take that habit to school. With that ur son wud become more active in school. Also try talk to the teach n tell em not to put much pressure on the child, as that wud put fear in him n hinder progress....
Good luck

Your son shows symptoms of Selective Mutism.

Selective Mutism

Selective Mutism is a complex childhood anxiety disorder characterized by a child's inability to speak and communicate effectively in select social settings, such as school. These children are able to speak and communicate in settings where they are comfortable, secure, and relaxed.

More than 90% of children with Selective Mutism also have social phobia or social anxiety.This disorder is quite debilitating and painful to the child. Children and adolescents with Selective Mutism have an actual FEAR of speaking and of social interactions where there is an expectation to speak and communicate. Many children with Selective Mutism have great difficulty responding or initiating communication in a nonverbal manner; therefore social engagement may be compromised in many children when confronted by others or in an overwhelming setting where they sense a feeling of expectation.

Not all children manifest their anxiety in the same way. Some may be completely mute and unable to speak or communicate to anyone in a social setting, others may be able to speak to a select few or perhaps whisper. Some children may stand motionless with fear as they are confronted with specific social settings. They may freeze, be expressionless, unemotional and may be socially isolated. Less severely affected children may look relaxed and carefree, and are able to socialize with one or a few children but are unable to speak and effectively communicate to teachers or most/all peers.

(...)

http://www.selectivemutismcenter.org/aboutus/whatisselectivemutism


Remove all pressure from your child to speak or play in school and ask the school if you or your wife or even the home teacher (people your son trusts) can stay at school with him for a couple of hours each day to help your kid feel comfortable at the school premises.

Omotakins:
I like ur sense of humour and ur advice. My concern is I've seen what my in-law's child of his age and others can do both at home and school. Anyway, ur advice is soothing. Thanks so much

Here u go again comparing him with what others can do.....I have not seen that kid but i like him already...Because he is making your adrenaline go haywire....

I believe he's gonna be one of the best u ever got...Some starts really slow man and by the time he clock 6-7, you will be surprise...
Do not make him grow faster than his age... he is just 3....

Kids are into technology this days, I discovered that immediately they came out of the womb, they fell inlove with cellphones...and tablets...

U can get those toy tablets that has alphabets and other charts that got A is for Apple...

Omotakins:
My son(almost 4yrs) is in the reception class. He doesn't respond to teachings at school, doesn't talk or play. This is the exact opposite at home. Plays very well at home, sings and talks about all he's taught in the school. He responds very well to the teachings of his home teacher. His teacher in school is saying he will repeat class 'cos there is nothing to show he's learnt things. What do I do? Teachers, educators and Co, ur help is needed pls.

One of the many habits of over-pampered kids.
He probably needs to be spoon-fed before he can learn.

Omotakins:
My son(almost 4yrs) is in the reception class. He doesn't respond to teachings at school, doesn't talk or play. This is the exact opposite at home. Plays very well at home, sings and talks about all he's taught in the school. He responds very well to the teachings of his home teacher. His teacher in school is saying he will repeat class 'cos there is nothing to show he's learnt things. What do I do? Teachers, educators and Co, ur help is needed pls.

Now I know you must be the reason why I came to Nland today, God wanted me to share our firsthand experience as parents with you.

One of our kids who is now a teenager was exactly like your son at that age. Went to daycare and would not speak while there but came home and talked and played and recited all learnings. Actually knew a lot more than taught in class. At a point, the day care director asked to see us because the staff were very concerned at the silence everytime. We told them all was well and they left it at that. Fortunately, in this part of the world, there is no threat of "no promotion" which by the way is just nonsense but that's another topic.

With no exaggeration whatsoever, I say that same child has always been at the top of their class, kind hearted, loved by every single teacher, outstandingly achieves in every undertaking, opens doors for us wherever we go (once people realize we are XYZ's parents, they bend over backwards to accommodate us), genius level smart (with multiple IQ and school test results to confirm). I am not joking when I say that sometimes I feel intimidated by the weight of the responsibility of raising a child who is so outstandingly briliant. These kinds of kids may never become chatter boxes but they are deep thinkers and you will come to realize that. Some of us talk a lot but that does not translate into high intelligence.

You MUST be an advocate for your defenceless child and don't let any teacher or proprietor bully you with threats. If they doubt the child's abilities, why not test him? Is he failing in school? And if he is, maybe it's just due to fear of his teachers or a lack of comfort with the class environment. I shudder at the thought of what they could be putting him through in their ignorance, I hope they are not spanking him

I pray that a time will come when seasoned, sound educators will run Nigeria's early childhood education programs so that they don't try to force developing kids into cookie cutter boxes that their limited exposure can comprehend. It's preposterous that they are considering having a toddler repeat a non class because the child is not like the others.

God has given you that child for a reason, you have a responsibility to stand up and defend him with all your might. If it means changing schools, do just that.

God bless you MMotimo

Richy4:


Here u go again comparing him with what others can do.....I have not seen that kid but i like him already...Because he is making your adrenaline go haywire....

I believe he's gonna be one of the best u ever got...Some starts really slow man and by the time he clock 6-7, you will be surprise...
Do not make him grow faster than his age... he is just 3....

Kids are into technology this days, I discovered that immediately they came out of the womb, they fell inlove with cellphones...and tablets...

U can get those toy tablets that has alphabets and other charts that got A is for Apple...

Thanks, bro

steppin:

One of the many habits of over-pampered kids.
He probably needs to be spoon-fed before he can learn.

I disagree with this. It's got nothing to do with pampering. He eats, does everything virtually by himself at home. He gets frowned at when necessary as I don't tolerate any poo.

MMotimo:


Now I know you must be the reason why I came to Nland today, God wanted me to share our firsthand experience as parents with you.

One of our kids who is now a teenager was exactly like your son at that age. Went to daycare and would not speak while there but came home and talked and played and recited all learnings. Actually knew a lot more than taught in class. At a point, the day care director asked to see us because the staff were very concerned at the silence everytime. We told them all was well and they left it at that. Fortunately, in this part of the world, there is no threat of "no promotion" which by the way is just nonsense but that's another topic.

With no exaggeration whatsoever, I say that same child has always been at the top of their class, kind hearted, loved by every single teacher, outstandingly achieves in every undertaking, opens doors for us wherever we go (once people realize we are XYZ's parents, they bend over backwards to accommodate us), genius level smart (with multiple IQ and school test results to confirm). I am not joking when I say that sometimes I feel intimidated by the weight of the responsibility of raising a child who is so outstandingly briliant. These kinds of kids may never become chatter boxes but they are deep thinkers and you will come to realize that. Some of us talk a lot but that does not translate into high intelligence.

You MUST be an advocate for your defenceless child and don't let any teacher or proprietor bully you with threats. If they doubt the child's abilities, why not test him? Is he failing in school? And if he is, maybe it's just due to fear of his teachers or a lack of comfort with the class environment. I shudder at the thought of what they could be putting him through in their ignorance, I hope they are not spanking him

I pray that a time will come when seasoned, sound educators will run Nigeria's early childhood education programs so that they don't try to force developing kids into cookie cutter boxes that their limited exposure can comprehend. It's preposterous that they are considering having a toddler repeat a non class because the child is not like the others.

God has given you that child for a reason, you have a responsibility to stand up and defend him with all your might. If it means changing schools, do just that.

I'm a man, but was almost shedding tears reading ur post. Thanks very much. My wife called my attention to some mark she saw on my son's back. It was that of being caned. The school sets parameters determining promotion into d next class. They believe that at that level he must be able to write 1-20, a-z and count well. He does nothing of these in school and doesn't respond. Extremely quiet and hardly eats his food in school but will recite all poems, count 1-50, a-z not write beyond 4 with few letters, demand for food if he's hungry, plays very well at home.

Omotakins:
My wife called my attention to some mark she saw on my son's back. It was that of being caned. .

Good thing this session is over
You know what to do

Maybe he doesn't like his teacher.

It's simple Op,
Change his school as soon as possible

Secondly, he might play and sing at home because h is used to his family.

If you don't mind find a daycare in your neighbourhood, where he will go to after school for some months, so that he will get to familiarise himself with his peer group aside his family.

When he gets used to and comfortable with been around his mate or people older and younger than him, he will cope.

Different children have different character. There is nothing wrong wit your child.