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Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father - Family - Nairaland

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Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by gmDr: 10:36am On Jul 19, 2016
Hello people,

I reside in Abuja, my neighbour has the habit of battery, always beating his wife and children. Whenever they try to complain he'll threaten to even do more, that if they try the slightest he'll stop sponsoring them.
Most of the time, if he wants to beat the children and his wife tries to intervene, he'll end up beating her first.
He has 4 children, two are in secondary school, two are in university. They've been enduring all his mess because they want him to sponsor them, (which he can, he's a senior staff in Ministry of Education in Abuja).
I really think something can be done. I'm sure there should be agencies/commissions that work to fix such such things. I'm thinking of the possibility of reporting the man, so that he will stop the battering. And that whether he likes or not he'll still continue to sponsor the children.

I need you guys to put me through. Thanks already
Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by Prettiepearlz(f): 12:45pm On Jul 19, 2016
Yes, I think there are agencies and ministries you can report to, but you need to carry it out carefully so you wouldn't turn out to be the bad guy. Be careful, you know he is a senior civil servant, so he wouldn't use his "connections" to wiggle out and you know in Nigeria, they don't do follow ups on cases, they never take anything serious on like other countries even the ones they take up is only for publicity stunt. I pray God help you, I hope and pray that family gets all the help they need. You will get meaningful advices on how to carry it out successfully from these people
Cococandy
Thorpido
Edwife
Mindfulness
Royalroy
EfemenaXY. Good luck
Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by Prettiepearlz(f): 12:46pm On Jul 19, 2016
Yes, I think there are agencies and ministries you can report to, but you need to carry it out carefully so you wouldn't turn out to be the bad guy. Be careful, you know he is a senior civil servant, so he wouldn't use his "connections" to wiggle out and you know in Nigeria, they don't do follow ups on cases, they never take anything serious on like other countries even the ones they take up is only for publicity stunt. I pray God help you, I hope and pray that family gets all the help they need. You will get meaningful advices on how to carry it out successfully from these people
Cococandy
Thorpido
Edwife
Mindfulness
Royalroy
EfemenaXY.

Note: You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped so be careful and make sure you don't end up being a bad person. Good luck

1 Like

Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by gmDr: 1:16pm On Jul 19, 2016
Thanks thanks
Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by gmDr: 1:20pm On Jul 19, 2016
Prettiepearlz:
Note: You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped so be careful and make sure you don't end up being a bad person. Good luck

You're right. I've talked with the older children a few times and I'm we'll be fine. I've not told them about what I'm trying to work though
Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by Prettiepearlz(f): 1:22pm On Jul 19, 2016
gmDr:


You're right. I've talked with the older children a few times and I'm we'll be fine. I've not told them about this research I'm making though
OK then, good luck dear.
Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by pheyhi(f): 3:19pm On Jul 19, 2016
Seriously if the woman has endured this for close to twenty years, then she doesn't want to leave,
you hit my kids once, I would give you a benefit of doubt buh close to twenty years should have given her enough time to do something about this battery buh she didn't.
In as much as you try to help some people,they don't want your help..
This woman doesn't want to leave her husband nor stand up to him, if she wanted to, she would have done that ages ago..
I know it pains you buh there are some situation that you can't help
If you reported to the police and she denies it, what would you do? You can't do much about this situation more so she has grown up kids too

4 Likes

Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by Chylo(m): 3:45pm On Jul 19, 2016
So if they arrest the man and sack him, hope you will take over his responsibilities?

2 Likes

Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by Nobody: 4:25pm On Jul 19, 2016
Do these people want your help?

3 Likes

Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by thorpido(m): 4:38pm On Jul 19, 2016
Does the wife work?It seems the wife doesn't want to do anything about the situation probably because she depends solely on him for money.
Unfortunately,she(they)have to seek help first.

1 Like

Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by Bolade005: 6:03pm On Jul 19, 2016
You want to interfere in a marriage that's well over two decades? Are you for real? Did any of the abused ask for your help? What gives you the right to poke your nose into another family's matter without being invited?

The woman has two children in the university already, I doubt if they'd sit idly by and watch their father beat their mother. They're old enough to fight this battle and save their own mother. They don't need you.

You should face your front and leave this family alone.

3 Likes

Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by EfemenaXY: 9:26pm On Jul 19, 2016
Prettiepearlz:
Yes, I think there are agencies and ministries you can report to, but you need to carry it out carefully so you wouldn't turn out to be the bad guy. Be careful, you know he is a senior civil servant, so he wouldn't use his "connections" to wiggle out and you know in Nigeria, they don't do follow ups on cases, they never take anything serious on like other countries even the ones they take up is only for publicity stunt. I pray God help you, I hope and pray that family gets all the help they need. You will get meaningful advices on how to carry it out successfully from these people
Cococandy
Thorpido
Edwife
Mindfulness
Royalroy
EfemenaXY.
Note: You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped so be careful and make sure you don't end up being a bad person. Good luck

This story is not worth commenting on.

Are they (his wife and kids) ímbècilès? The wife most probably is but what about the two older kids in uni?

One against five. Odiegu (abi how una say am for Igbo?)

There is absolutely no reason under the sun why that woman shouldn't be doing something to bring in money, no matter how small. The same goes for her kids, especially the two older ones. They haven't suffered enough, nor received enough beatings from him. Otherwise living rough should motivate them to get off their backsides to go out there and hustle.

One against five.

Mtcheeew.

2 Likes

Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by gmDr: 11:19pm On Jul 19, 2016
Chylo:
So if they arrest the man and sack him, hope you will take over his responsibilities?

Haba na. I'm talking a call to order
Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by gmDr: 11:27pm On Jul 19, 2016
EfemenaXY:

There is absolutely no reason under the sun why that woman shouldn't be doing something to bring in money, no matter how small. The same goes for her kids, especially the two older ones.
You're right. The wife has a shop, where she sells some foodstuffs. But for the children, similar can't be said

1 Like

Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by Prettiepearlz(f): 11:46pm On Jul 19, 2016
EfemenaXY:


This story is not worth commenting on.

Are they (his wife and kids) ímbècilès? The wife most probably is but what about the two older kids in uni?

One against five. Odiegu (abi how una say am for Igbo?)

There is absolutely no reason under the sun why that woman shouldn't be doing something to bring in money, no matter how small. The same goes for her kids, especially the two older ones. They haven't suffered enough, nor received enough beatings from him. Otherwise living rough should motivate them to get off their backsides to go out there and hustle.

One against five.

Mtcheeew.
Lol, you just made me laugh ma'am. And you are right, I was wondering why they haven't taught the man a lesson ever since they have grown old enough to be an undergraduate. I am quite sure their mum belong to the categories of women who believe they are suffering for their kids and we never can tell probably they don't get enough money for them to save and start a lil business( especially if the pocket money is only one sided), maybe what they get is only enough to clear some bills in school and the little left is for feeding (just saying though). But all in all, like I said earlier they need to help themselves before they can be helped. A lot of kids survived in school without their fathers so they aren't the first. The ball is in their court anyway.
Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by Prettiepearlz(f): 11:47pm On Jul 19, 2016
gmDr:

You're right. The wife has a shop, where she sells some foodstuffs. But for the children, similar can't be said
I think with that she can still give her children a better life without their father. Why not ask the kids to speak with their mother and find out what she(the mum) thinks. But in the meantime all I can tell you is for you to be careful and keep praying for them, if there's anything that is very difficult to interfere in, it's issues that has to do with Families especially one that you ain't part of by blood.

1 Like

Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by Nobody: 1:48am On Jul 20, 2016
No need to report him.His kids will deal with him when they stand on their feet. There's time for every payback. This is the time to endure.

2 Likes

Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by HaneefahRN(f): 7:46pm On Jul 20, 2016
Did they complain to you? She has been enduring it for years without leaving or standing up to him, what's your own business? More so she has relatively grown children already. Don't poke into such seriously, they are grown adults here and have chose to endure battery so just look away jare. They'll sort themselves out
Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by DollyParton1(f): 7:55am On Jul 21, 2016
Chylo:
So if they arrest the man and sack him, hope you will take over his responsibilities?
See!!!
One of the wife beaters!!!
Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by DollyParton1(f): 7:59am On Jul 21, 2016
Bolade005:
You want to interfere in a marriage that's well over two decades? Are you for real? Did any of the abused ask for your help? What gives you the right to poke your nose into another family's matter without being invited?

The woman has two children in the university already, I doubt if they'd sit idly by and watch their father beat their mother. They're old enough to fight this battle and save their own mother. They don't need you.

You should face your front and leave this family alone.
Did you read the post at all?
The father beats the wife and the kids. And always threaten to stop sponsoring them. He is using the fact that they depend on him financially to hold them down.
Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by DollyParton1(f): 8:01am On Jul 21, 2016
LynnPetra:
No need to report him.His kids will deal with him when they stand on their feet. There's time for every payback. This is the time to endure.
That's if he hasn't killed their mama before then.
Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by DollyParton1(f): 8:03am On Jul 21, 2016
HaneefahRN:
Did they complain to you? She has been enduring it for years without leaving or standing up to him, what's your own business? More so she has relatively grown children already. Don't poke into such seriously, they are grown adults here and have chose to endure battery so just look away jare. They'll sort themselves out
Really?
shocked shocked shocked shocked
Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by Nobody: 8:08am On Jul 21, 2016
DollyParton1:

That's if he hasn't killed their mama before then.


Abi oooooooooooooo. How do one even tame violent men? Isn't it better to just cut off his "Big Ego" and run?
Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by HaneefahRN(f): 8:55am On Jul 21, 2016
DollyParton1:

Really?
shocked shocked shocked shocked

Yes o. I hate domestic violence. But I see no reason for the OP to stick his neck in, in this case. If it were a woman with probably little children I can see reason for it. But here is a grown woman probably in her 40s or 50s with, four mature children, if they aren't ready to fight for themselves, let them continue. They aren't ready to break free from his bondage is all I see, who knows for how long that woman had been maltreated yet staying, as they say, 'cos of the children ' .
Re: Help, Neglect And Battering Of Wife And Children By Father by Bolade005: 10:59am On Jul 21, 2016
DollyParton1:

Did you read the post at all?
The father beats the wife and the kids. And always threaten to stop sponsoring them. He is using the fact that they depend on him financially to hold them down.
So?

You believe the man still beats two grown men in the university?

Madam, did the family ask for his help? No?

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