I've always had this in mind after a thread where the woman complained that her spouse is too uptight and she can't even call him ODE (i.e) a foolish person,dull, 'dundy'...etc. A male Nairalander with all seriousness said he won't take such from his wife, haba uncle, is life that serious
Why act so strict like a school principal?

I got wondering, is it wrong to tell one's partner 'shut up' 'olodo'... et al?
Cc: IamCharis
Sleekyshuga
Dygeasy
Cfcman
MizmyColi... emm

Beamborla:
Oh yes!
Why can't I call him ode or olodo?

The problem is not knowing where to draw the line.

Dygeasy:
My partner and I call each other "ode" quite a lot that I started feeling like it was my third name. A line should be drawn though but in my own case, it's going to take a long time.

But then, it makes some people uncomfortable so it's quite subjective and should be kept in check in marriage where kids are present. I wouldn't want my kids to be confused about what the real name of their parents are.

thorpido:
I don't think that should be a problem if the partner really is one.

There are other words one can use and not those two.

Beamborla:

Iro o!
I canor date olodo or ode for real na.

He should be my best friend...I should be free around him and vice versa

iAmCharis:
Well, like they say, different strokes for different folks. If the level of friendship you have with your partner is 'tighter than tight', then it's really not a problem as you two must have understood each other. You should also know when he/she is getting offended (facial expressions) and put a lid on it. You should also be wary of how you say things like that in public places as your lovilovi might get offended.

Personally? If I can't playfully call you ode, I won't even propose to you. Friends don't only support and help each other. They also fool around together and heck! There's nothing sweeter than that. It's awesome fun

Though, when our kids start growing, we might have to stop saying things like that in their presence so they don't pick it up as a normal way to relate with all their peers.

Ishilove:

How is your wife? Please extend my greetings to her

iAmCharis:
Which one? The one you dash me?

TV01:
Playful relationships? Yes, absolutely yes!

But using derogatory or abusive language does not necessarily equate to playful. Early on I told my wife I thought it was a bad idea - as a matter of policy !

I think it's easy for the use of such words to become embedded - without ever meaning to. I also think they can be dropped at inappropriate times - totally unintentionally - that may cause hurt.

I also think a man is more likely to drop one unthinkingly, and a woman is more likely to take one at face value, when no hurt was intended. Long/short, I believewomen are a tad more sensitive. I know I've said things that "touched" without meaning to, how much more with words specifically designed to hurt?

Funny enough, this type of "dissing banter" is more characteristic of males. Notice how women don't give themselves nicknames, and me do, usually derogatry/funny ones like jughead etc?

I know it's each couple to their own, but I think it helps to accord your spouse that honour and lends an air of "special", no to pedestalise one another though.. I have pledged in my heart never to use foul language, raise my voice or my hand to my wife. So far, so good...but women, they can test you eh!


TV