My people, I have finally found myself a man o. I am already in my mid thirties. Fiancé is in his late 30's. We are based abroad. I am studying. Now my father says we should send N1, 500, 000 for the items to be bought and distributed to the clan . This includes the bride price.

I am so upset because my cousin who got married recently didn't spend more than N150, 000. Is it because the groom to be is from England? This is racism!

We are actually having a civil ceremony here. But Fiancé wants to fulfill all righteousness.

What do I do now?

The question should be, why is my father so wicked?
When did your cousin get married? You know things are very expensive now.

Though I am sure he'll definitely want to get his cut, that's what makes him human.

You'll just have to state to your dad firmly and politely that you both are unable to afford the said amount.
No need to get into a verbal brawl just state what amount you're willing to work with leave and allowance for it to be increased after your dad may put forward some resistance.

For e.g you may be willing to spend 150,000 on total so tell him you have 100,000 after the initial protest by your dad you can now say you're willing to increase it to 150,000.

Good luck

Not to worry I am almost in the same shoes but its a black man in the overseas
This is what I did, I just asked my dad to tell his kinsmen that we don't have that much, he said they insisted
I didn't say a word, I ignored everyone of them
When they ask what the plan is, I just said " I am the one that said I wanted to get married when we gather the money we will let you know"
I went ahead to do my other plans
You will realize that they will go ahead and negotiate with themselves and get back to you with a very considerable amount even when they come back don't just jump at it take your time to accept..
Note: Its our parents dream to have us married so when they realize their actions is making you lose interest they will arrange well

^^^^

Absolutely agree with the OP above...pretend to no longer be interested.

Or you could just negotiate directly.

1.5mil for the dowry and kinsmen! Igbo kwenu!

Igbo kwenu, really
How did you find out she is Igbo.?
To bomb you dey hungry me now.

sisisioge:
^^^^

Absolutely agree with the OP above...pretend to no longer be interested.

Or you could just negotiate directly.

1.5mil for the dowry and kinsmen! Igbo kwenu!

SirVintageCock:
Igbo kwenu, really
How did you find out she is Igbo.?
To bomb you dey hungry me now.

hey oldie...your choco is renowned!

sisisioge:


hey oldie...your choco is renowned!

Thanks o. He has called me twice already since yesterday. I simply allowed the call proceed to voice mail. I can't believe this.

Tell your daddy that after you discuss with your hubby,he called off d wedding,u and ur hubby can go on with other preparation,since u are of age,don't discuss anything abt it for lyk a month, then u wil see dat he wil call u to preach management to u ,

you're still a student right. that maybe your father trying to scare guys away from you or man has calculated the amount he spent on your education abroad so he needs a refund if you want to get married now.you can't invest and not expect profit.

I love your dad.he is my role model

That's just about 2500 pounds. Average earnings of a British is about 27,000 pounds per annum. He can afford it jor. Make ur papa taste pounds small na...

Thanks, but the guy knows the average dowry already from his research. I don't want my family to look bad. I don't want him to feel like he is a meal ticket.

Your dad wicked pass. Hope he don't price you out of the market. Bride price for these Polish girls is one KFC bucket. Or if the guy too sharp, one trip to Borno IDP camp and e don finish.

prettigurl16:
Thanks, but the guy knows the average dowry already from his research. I don't want my family to look bad. I don't want him to feel like he is a meal ticket.

Hope you have not told your man all the drama...
I don't think your dad is wicked, I feel its just ego/pride thing,, My daughter is this, she is marrying this and so whatever your list is, bring it on I can outdo just the other person.... Make una come see my daughter wedding oh

No, my father won't do that. He is the most honest Nigerian man I've ever known.

Politely tell him to desist from evil. It is evil to demand N1.5m when the actual amount is way below 200k.

This is the main reason I'm always careful when doing business with Nigerians. We are mostly fraudulent, dishonest and wicked in this part of the world. Very quick to take advantage of people in the name of business. If the actual worth of your good or service is N10, simply tell your clients N10.. The extra fraudulent N50 you choose to fraudulently add won't make you rich. It only makes you a f00l.


Sorry, for the sermon but I have to correct the already spreading notion on this thread. You see as some fraudulent posters are already applauding your dad. These are the set of people who upon receiving funds from their relatives abroad to build a mansion in Nigeria, will end up drinking their destinies away with relatives' sweat in beer parlour. They are the sets of people that will borrow money from a fellow hustler and never make a refund.

Give them N10m for a project, they will spend your money to the last kobo on their never-ending personal life projects problems whilst ignoring the very purpose of the project. Ask them for PROJET delivery and they'll come up with stories about how trailers crush their parents on their way to buy materials, etc. Very wicked sets of people.

I don't know why I'm angry for being a Nigerian right now, but I'm angry.

Your dad is only trying to spiff up his bank account so he can fully enjoy all that Christmas has offer -- which by the way is only a coat of paint away from now.
1.5 million naira? See daylight robbery.