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She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls - Romance (7) - Nairaland

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Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by candygebsslim: 3:02am On Dec 21, 2016
A woman's reaction towards you is directly proportional to how you treat her.

Mr extra good and nice, u have given a detailed negative account of this lady and the only good you see in her is been a good teacher, and should we believe this is just the quality that has held you hostage for 5yrs.

Everything is your fault, there is something madam teacher is trying to teach you but you have sworn never to learn which has resulted to her nagging and fighting you. And from all you wrote I can tell that you are a big cheat.

Your problem is the 100k not ur wife to be

6 Likes

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by swiperthefox: 3:05am On Dec 21, 2016
saweide:
How would I convince the other lady
It seems she felt in love with me too
But u never disclosed my past to her
Before my nagging wife called her on fone telling her to distance herself from her husband
I really like this lady not becos of the money but naturally and by her character
She is humble, submissive, jovial, honest, Godly and which other qualities I can't find in my so called nagging wife

Pls can anyone advice me on how to convince this lady?

Her last word to me was that I should never in my life call her if I don't want to see the wrath of God
Is she your wife or fiancee? I simply think it is a case of see finish and calling a dog a bad name to hang it. Guy, the grass always looks greener on the other side. I think that your only focus is 100k the other lady promised you. I don't even think you like the other lady that much. The 100k is very attractive to you. It is better that you find a way to make your relationship work unless you both never loved each other in the first place. May be some ladies will learn from this write up to respect themselves. She allowed herself to get pregnant and moved in with you before marriage.

1 Like

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by candygebsslim: 3:17am On Dec 21, 2016
To add to it, be happy with your present state and thank God for it, strive like a man and build your finances. I sense financial frustration is not letting you see the good in your wife to be anymore maybe due to she can't assist you financially.

But this lady that has 100k to give, her money make her get good character.

By default I know is normal to be loyal to the spoon u eat with or intend to eat with. Doesn't mean you should eat away ur wisdom.

From all you said, you are still a boy, money is your problem. Postpone your marriage for one year and use the money intended for the marriage rites for an investment that will yield returns and get u married, can feed you without hoping on anyone anymore

1 Like

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by Originalsly: 3:26am On Dec 21, 2016
Hmmmmm.... I thought this was about what to do about the relationship.... how to move forward with regards to your baby mama and your daughter... only to find out it's about a more serious ehmmm... life or death matter. ... how to get back on speaking terms with someone who promised you 100K. You really deserve the woman in your life.
Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by Beey(f): 3:27am On Dec 21, 2016
aigjoey:
For this same nasty behavior I just left my girl last week. She has the same attributes and nature of your baby mama. She argues too much.. Nags more than buharis government,,, always right,, talk too much... In fact u can never correct her. The only time we are friends is during sex. In fact we even quarreled at times during sex. She is so some how. Ahhh.. God forbid.. My brother, I warned her, advice her, begged her to change but at d end she refused. Next for me was to walk out before I die young. If I mistakenly married her, I will be beating her everyday and u know the implications. My brother am out of her life for good and already have a girlfriend now who listen to voice of reasoning and homely. Pls run away.. U just cannot cope with her if eventually u two are married. Run o... Run oo
You left your gf last week and you already found a replacement? Na wa oh

1 Like

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by caon: 3:41am On Dec 21, 2016
schumastic:
THIS OP IS CONFUSE, AM I THE ONLY PERSON HAVING THE FEELINGS..

YOU ARE NOT MARRIED TO YOUR BABY MAMA BUT YOU CALL HER YOUR WIFE,
YOU ARE NOT HAVING ANYTHING TO DO WITH THE LADY THAT WANT TO OFFER HELP TO YOU BUT YOU KEPT YOUR PAST AWAY FROM HER,
YOUR BABY MAMA OR WIFE LIKE YOU CALL HER TOLD YOUR HELPER YOU BOTH ARE MARRIED AND YOU ARE ANGRY,
NOW YOU FOUND OUT YOU ARE IN LOVE WITH THE NEW LADY AND WANTS TO CALL IT QUIT.

OP YOU ARE CONFUSE, GO AND VISIT A THERAPIST



either he is confused or lying,forget men dey will come up with al sort of rubbish excuses just to leav a woman,even paint her a devil.if we ask d lady now,she wil have a book ful of demerits to be written about u.she is dat bad n yet u didn't dump her n now cos of common 100 k,u r already thinkin u are in lov wit another woman.I hail thee ooo.

2 Likes

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by caon: 3:47am On Dec 21, 2016
candygebsslim:
A woman's reaction towards you is directly proportional to how you treat her.

Mr extra good and nice, u have given a detailed negative account of this lady and the only good you see in her is been a good teacher, and should we believe this is just the quality that has held you hostage for 5yrs.

Everything is your fault, there is something madam teacher is trying to teach you but you have sworn never to learn which has resulted to her nagging and fighting you. And from all you wrote I can tell that you are a big cheat.

Your problem is the 100k not ur wife to be
well said,cohabited wit a woman for 5yrs ,u didn't leave until d issue of. Moneyy,he is talkin as. If he is witout fault.

2 Likes

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by bellotaofeek: 3:47am On Dec 21, 2016
Based on what you type here , Seems love never exist between you guys. I even wonder why you fall in love with her in the first place ( Maybe her physical characteristics) . Well ! My only advice for you is to split up. We have heard series of homicide ( This is how it started ) . Don't even let her take the custody of your daughter . She may not be able to raise her properly .
P.S : This comment is only based on your own side of the story
Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by greatermax77(m): 3:48am On Dec 21, 2016
Any woman that kills my dream, I will kill her's.
OP, if u eventually marries this girl, high blood presure may be ur partner

1 Like

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by Nobody: 4:14am On Dec 21, 2016
Its best if you ask yourself what's important to you right now? You have no boundaries and respect in this relationship, nothing will change after marriage if it was not right in the beginning. The longer you drag this "relationship" the more frustrated both of you will be.
Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by Wolex143: 4:18am On Dec 21, 2016
saweide:
Thanks to you all for ur candid and matured advice
Am still expecting to get more before I conclude
lolz u're nt ready to move forwarding, nt that am cursing u, bt i think wen ur wife to be send u to where u dn't like u'll jump into conclusion without advice.
Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by Cajayi(m): 4:24am On Dec 21, 2016
Guy be careful let it not be that you are about jumping from frying pan to fire abi you have not heard and understand the saying the devil you know is better than the Angel you don't know? Take a sheet of paper and sincerely sit down and write on one side the goods you see in your gal and on the other list the bad... Remember when you were planning to woo her before you were able to produce the girl child through her.
. Only you can solve this problem of yours
Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by dingbang(m): 4:32am On Dec 21, 2016
Estharfabian:
undecided
If You think she ain't good enough for you, dump her. it's not rocket science.



she has a child for him.... Dont u get?
Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by Nobody: 4:35am On Dec 21, 2016
Baawaa:
If your post is real,you know yourself than anybody around you,so do the right thing at the right time,one way or the other you have lady that is nursings your child,haba!Moreover, you have been together for good 5 years,why now all these allegations?Mind you, 100 thousand Naira cannot solve your problems.calm down,do the needful
do the needful, do the needful....what's the needful na?
Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by Kurupt01: 4:44am On Dec 21, 2016
aigjoey:
For this same nasty behavior I just left my girl last week. She has the same attributes and nature of your baby mama. She argues too much.. Nags more than buharis government,,, always right,, talk too much... In fact u can never correct her. The only time we are friends is during sex. In fact we even quarreled at times during sex. She is so some how. Ahhh.. God forbid.. My brother, I warned her, advice her, begged her to change but at d end she refused. Next for me was to walk out before I die young. If I mistakenly married her, I will be beating her everyday and u know the implications. My brother am out of her life for good and already have a girlfriend now who listen to voice of reasoning and homely. Pls run away.. U just cannot cope with her if eventually u two are married. Run o... Run oo



I don't know where to start from, you were in a relationship last week which you called quits because of your ex's behavior. Thus week you're in another relationship with someone who you describe as homely and listens to words of reasoning.
Maybe your ex was complaining because of your habit of looking at other women (you can't sasay you don't).
A week long relationship is not enough time to judge a lady you barely know.

2 Likes

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by Ademoore07(m): 4:45am On Dec 21, 2016
Hmmmm. U said she had a baby for u out of wedlock. If I were you, I will hold on to my baby and send her packing. Marriage/ relationship is meant to be enjoyed and not endured. Send the bitch packing, mehn undecided
Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by udumosam23(m): 4:49am On Dec 21, 2016
saweide:
Hello All my name is Saweide segun. This is a true life story am about to share. I really need a sincere advice from matured minds and no abuse pls

I am not Married but with a girl child. All plans to arrange my marriage with my gal is slated for next year. But I noticed that my wife to be and I are not compatible at all

Ever since I met my wife to be in the year 2011. She has been so nagging and rude to me. She never obey me for once. We always quarell

Right from day one till this present time we have been living a cat and dog life. She is a nagging woman. She can't say sorry if she is right or wrong and she is not submissive she disrespect my mum anytime we pay her a visit.

She is not hardworking,and she doesn't have any future plans.. She has never for once encourage me in my career


I have tried to call her several times that she can change and she will promise to Change. But later she will put up her attitude again

She had a daughter for me out of wedlock and that has been holding me from chasing her away of my life

She is living with me presently

The first year I met her I was in Abuja and she was in lagos

She keeps a lot of guys before but that has changed. She no longer does that cos I fought it

Sometimes we quarrel and it attracts neibors that comes around to settle our fights and this has brought Shame to me

I told my mum about that and it gave her a lot of concerns

I told her am enduring the relationship
And that I have made up my mind to quit the relationship and let go that All plans by her family to for introduction and engagement ceremony has been cancelled that am no longer interested

Something happened last month between us

I noticed she has been monitoring me and she always go through my phones whenever I fell asleep
She will check my messages with my friends especially girls

There was this lady we do chat always. But she was not my lover and I don't flirt with her on chat but since we always chat, she suspect a foul play and unknowingly to me she has copied the girl number and saved it only her phone in the midnight while I was sleeping
Sometimes in the mid of the night I would wake up and caught her going thru my phone

She has done that several times and I later password my phone but little did I know despite passwording
My phone she still have access to my chats and data

I don't know how she hack into my phone despite passwording my phone

So I woke up one day and I found out that she has changed my profile picture on whatsapp to her own a pics taken together by me and her holding ourselves, I asked her who changed the dp but she denied it...

So last week Friday I had a meeting on business with a lady I do normally chat with which the lady promised to pay me 100k to start my business
I so much like this lady because of her nature and for her intelligence which my wife to be never had.
Tho I never discuss anything about my past to her before... But I didn't tell her I have someone in my life

My wife suspecting that I had a meeting with this lady called her and told her to desist from me that I am married...
Before I know the lady who promised to give me 100k to start my business blocked me on my whatsapp

And I called her she told me someone called her to leave her husband alone that in my life I should not call her again, I tried to explain to her but she cut off the line and hang up the phone on me


Now the business is over and that was how I loose the 100k. Up till now I have not called this lady

Pls what should I do it seems am in love with the lady but I want to call it quit with my nagging wife as I always call her.


How should I contact this lady and convince her

Pls I need a good advice.. Thanks all for your time




I would've just passed cos you sounded too childish to be sincere.

But maybe you'll need the advice.

If truely she has been with you for five years and you're saying all these things about her in the fifth year, then you're not a good person.

Truth is that, there was a first, second and third year both of you loved each other to the extend she had a child and kept it for you.

By your confession I realise she made sacrifices for you. You said she use to keep other men, now she don't. Do you think it was easy on her part?

Which serious man will deny his wife to be access to his phone? Especially as they're already cohabiting? You got a lot hidden already, what do you expect from her?

You complain that both of you are not compatible, did you just realize it after five years? Guy that's so unfair. It means you lived your life without carrying her along.

What have you done to improve her condition? To bring her up to your standard? If you can whimp this way cos she blew a job of 100k, and willing to trade her for it, then you're not just a selfish kid, but a wicked one.

Truth is that you've compared her to other girls or ladies you interact with in social media, and wish she's like one of them. These were planted, watered and nurtured by other men. They didn't just become what they are. They were made.

OP make your woman what you want her be. Take responsibility for her, if she don't have a future, give her one. If she don't understand teach her, if she's local and naive op send her to school. Buy her a good phone and expose her to social media too.

Then see if other people will not appreciate her the way you appreciate the ones you see.


OP if you think you're matured enough to have a woman for yourself, then I believe you've got one. MAKE HER WHAT YOU WISH HER TO BE.

7 Likes

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by Kelly2713(m): 4:58am On Dec 21, 2016
if i comment now the op will batch me. but let me say something.

the op is not sincere with the wife to be. why should he be chating with other ladies when he has a woman to chat with in the house.?

why is the op so in love with 100k as if he's life is in it. and do u think a strange woman can give a guy a business of 100k just like that without aving something in mind?

why is the business woman herein terminates the relationship aving find out that the guy is married?

from here, my fellow nlanders: i guess the wife to be is a good woman only that the op is not a loving, caring, making good out of the woman and a sincere man

4 Likes

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by wristbangle: 5:16am On Dec 21, 2016
aigjoey:
For this same nasty behavior I just left my girl last week. She has the same attributes and nature of your baby mama. She argues too much.. Nags more than buharis government,,, always right,, talk too much... In fact u can never correct her. The only time we are friends is during sex. In fact we even quarreled at times during sex. She is so some how. Ahhh.. God forbid.. My brother, I warned her, advice her, begged her to change but at d end she refused. Next for me was to walk out before I die young. If I mistakenly married her, I will be beating her everyday and u know the implications. My brother am out of her life for good and already have a girlfriend now who listen to voice of reasoning and homely. Pls run away.. U just cannot cope with her if eventually u two are married. Run o... Run oo

Lol u left her last week and u have another gf. Just one week interval? cheesycheesy

See elimination by substitution o! cheesy chai

That aside, I believe the OP has received enough advise. You know the right thing to do. A broken relationship is far better than divorce anytime, any day.

2 Likes

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by AfroBlue(m): 5:20am On Dec 21, 2016
I've grown to dislike, almost hate des wimp stories posted by spineless males on NL.

it raised my blood pressure reading dat chit. angry

Man, Grow a f-in set of balls and send that nagging non compatible witch packing. chai

1 Like

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by sirusX(m): 5:21am On Dec 21, 2016
aigjoey:
For this same nasty behavior I just left my girl last week. She has the same attributes and nature of your baby mama. She argues too much.. Nags more than buharis government,,, always right,, talk too much... In fact u can never correct her. The only time we are friends is during sex. In fact we even quarreled at times during sex. She is so some how. Ahhh.. God forbid.. My brother, I warned her, advice her, begged her to change but at d end she refused. Next for me was to walk out before I die young. If I mistakenly married her, I will be beating her everyday and u know the implications. My brother am out of her life for good and already have a girlfriend now who listen to voice of reasoning and homely. Pls run away.. U just cannot cope with her if eventually u two are married. Run o... Run oo

Beey:
You left your gf last week and you already found a replacement? Na wa oh
^^^^ You go fear that kain thing shocked

@aigjoey...this your own get k-leg too. one can't just get a girl to accept within a week except u've bn nursing her before you broke up a.k.a. cheating grin

1 Like

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by Beey(f): 5:30am On Dec 21, 2016
sirusX:



^^^^ You go fear that kain thing shocked

@aigjoey...this your own get k-leg too. one can't just get a girl to accept within a week except u've bn nursing her before you broke up a.k.a. cheating grin
Let him explain this Biko.Moment of truth grin
Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by Origin(f): 5:33am On Dec 21, 2016
Five years ? Marry her. Its either you are committed or not. A real man should tell the world he is in a relationship.

Husband give her peace of mind.

Wife give yourself peace of mind.
Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by Praktikals(m): 5:33am On Dec 21, 2016
saweide:



Pls I need a good advice..


Bros, the only problem you have is that you have no problem. Marry both of them and everyone will be happy. Thank me later.
Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by Impeller(m): 5:37am On Dec 21, 2016
cococandy:

Many of you post comments like A-holes. Like you can just take someone's child just like that.
See your mouth
See your hmm-mmm. Jokes apart, I'd like to make babies with you. Clearly, you're the type I won't quarrel with no matter what.....
Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by marhoinspire: 5:41am On Dec 21, 2016
Baawaa:
If your post is real,you know yourself than anybody around you,so do the right thing at the right time,one way or the other you have lady that is nursings your child,haba!Moreover, you have been together for good 5 years,why now all these allegations?Mind you, 100 thousand Naira cannot solve your problems.calm down,do the needful
so u are saying he suld marry her abi?
a broken relationship is better than a broken marriage.
the closest hell fire to the real one is bad marriage.

1 Like

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by CP(m): 5:44am On Dec 21, 2016
My advice to you is that if you can stayed with her for Over 4years that means you are already married to her. Please note that all marriage without Jesus christ, patience and understandings all crash. My brother women do change sometime. Finally is not good for a girl child to grow up from separate parent.
Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by mira4u: 5:51am On Dec 21, 2016
saweide:


She is humble, submissive, jovial, honest, Godly and which other qualities I can't find in my so called nagging wife

And how did you know the other woman possesses these qualities? Have you lived with her before or was it just through the chats you had with her? Sorry to say, you sound like a child. She is better than your fiancé because she has 100k to offer bah. Tomorrow you will come back to tell us how this other woman controls you, blah blah blah. Brother you are not ready for marriage yet.

1 Like

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by Ontop123(m): 5:52am On Dec 21, 2016
You pleaded not to be insulted but, you insulted yourself. What I can deduce from your story is that you simply dislike your girl cos of the new one that promised you 100k. You didn't love her neither is she as intelligent as you claimed. You only need the money. I cannot agree with you that your girl has all these characters you mentioned yet both of you have been together since 2011. You probably dislike cos of her inability to give you money. My advice to you is to be a man and stop looking up to women for success.

1 Like

Re: She Goes Through My Phone When I Sleep, Now See What She Caused. Advice Pls by marhoinspire: 5:54am On Dec 21, 2016
The relationship is faulty from the beginning.
You are dating a girl and she even had a baby for you yet NO ENGAGEMENT or FORMAL INTRODUCTION.

To make matter worst, u stay 2geda like husband and wife.
After you don vandalize her choko u wan leave her abi; u lie!!!
If you keep eating what you should not eat, it won't be easy the day you will vomit it.
As for my opinion A BROKEN RELATIONSHIP IS BETTER THAN A BROKEN MARRIAGE.

DON'T MARRY HER OUT OF PITY.

BAD MARRIAGE IS HELL ON EARTH.

Break the relationship n settle her off if not she can sue for damages ( a filed promise to marry is an offense). dats if she knows her rights sha.

If the breakup is not peaceful, it ll be hell for you bcus d devil can use her to disfiguring u (www.acid.com)

Its clear u are not born again.
Repent and ask God for forgiveness.

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