Hello people, this is a cry for help from a desperate oyibo woman, wife and mother, who really needs your advice. My husband found his "eldorado" about a month ago; he stoped working and started to bring a lot of money (by "a lot" I mean literally "a lot" home; by private investigations I realized that he is a drug dealer (I mean there is no doubt). He doesn´t want to talk to me, sayin that I don´t want him to earn money; he denies that he would pushing, but tells me such a bullshit like "he gave me a lot of money because he likes me" etc.

What can I do? We are living in Europe. My husband is a person of noble sang; he is a king of village. I´m really frozen by the thought that he might end up in a jail and I´ll be here alone with the rest of our family.

What shall I do? Should I speak to his parents? (In fact, I have good relationship with his family, but I´m afraid that this could be a shock for them.) What would you do if were wearing my shoes? I´m really in need of your opinion.

Either way she's stuck!! Its risky for her to 'cut' just as much as it is to stay!!

A blessing in disguise!!!

Take the money and invest in a future without him because in the end, it's either he'd be arrested or killed. . .

U must be prayerful and pls talk2 is family abt the issue

I will advise u utilise d money he is giving u now wisely. probably invest for future in ur name. cos definitely he will be caught and u know d dam consequences

Listen save all the money you can. I would nag the living hell out of him to stop. I wouldnt advise you telling his family he may not be sending them any money and bitterness may evolve and they end up shopping him to the police or worst.
If its too much for you run as far away as you can. You must be very careful not to be involved. If he cares for you he will stop before its too late.

Raymand:

Take the money and invest in a future without him because in the end, it's either he'd be arrested or killed. . .

i would tend to support Rays post but then do all you can to make him stop

ask if he'll do you a good deal on some stuff.

Get down on your kneels and pray to overcome your fear

fear is a negative energy, take it easy with him and he would stop trafficking powder,

Do you not know police tap line.?
Do you know if you take even a penny the day they will arrest him they will arrest you too.?
You know what will become of your children.
By the way that money is blood money nothing good can come ot of it.
You waht to shop for your childrens fun with Blood money.
I alway tell my kids there is nothing they will not be able to buy for themselves. It may take longer than other people but at the end they will also have it without sleepless nights.

mamaput:

Do you not know police tap line.?
Do you know if you take even a penny the day they will arrest him they will arrest you too.?
You know what will become of your children.
By the way that money is blood money nothing good can come ot of it.
You what to shop for your children's fun with Blood money.
I alway tell my kids there is nothing they will not be able to buy for themselves. It may take longer than other people but at the end they will also have it without sleepless nights.

mamaput,
what would you do if you get to know that your son who had done very well in the school and have gone up to become a graduate had actually cheated during his exams,would you go and report him to the exam board ?
@mrs sundaqueen,every damn single penny that he gives you ,u must save because drug dealing doesn't last for long ,sooner or later he would be caught or something would happen that makes the money not to come like it use to .
about telling his family , you don't need to call a family meeting ,but there are surely some matured and respected members of that family ,like his dad (never tell his mom,women emotions can't be trusted ) or do u have any of his brother that u know is also matured enough ?
dealing in drugs doesn't mean he should be abandoned ,no one in this life enjoys doing evil things except they have some mental problems,do u have a pastor that you can trust to pray with you and still keep things confidential ,i had actually been in a church that one of the sisters faced same problem like you and it was solved,not easy but it was solved and the best thing is that it was not known by many and her husband came out of it .
this is like someone that smoke cocaine,how on earth do u think that a right thinking human being would smoke what he is church that it could kill him ? so you see something is wrong somewhere ,what is at play here is the demon that is behind the love of money and when it gets hold of someone they would do what they would not have liked to do if they were in their normal senses.
back to mamaput ,if your brother or husband because of the love of money should engage in armed robbery and was caught (God forbid) would you desert him and hope that he killed or would you desire that he is saved and would have some sort of miracle in his life that would make him to stop life of robbery ?do we not have vibrant preachers today in Nigeria and else where who were former drug users and pusher ? how are us sure that this case is hopeless and that the best option for mrs sundaqueen is to abandon her husband ?

Did i write anywere i will report to police.
You think German police a stupid.
If i have a husband that dose drugs i will kick him out.
Because when the police come for him it will not be in my house .
I have children and i have to think of them.
These children go to school.
Germany is not Gettho were everybodies father is or has gone to prison.
If my dSon is an Armed robber i will kick him out of my house too.
I will still love him hie is my son but i will kick him out.
That money you are telling her to keep what should she do with[b][/it save it for what[/b]
If she keeps one cent of that money she will go to jail and the welfare will take her children form her.
The children will come in Homes and thats the end.
That woman has to save her self and her children.

You think she has not spoken to the man.
Is she not taking the money.
Is she not spending it.
And is that money not Blood money
Blood money you use not to eat but to buy your children gameboy
I will not even talk on the phone about it.
Big brother is everywere

Well said mamaput.
@sundaqueen
how will you explain the source of your savings and investments when the police arrests - they eventually will - your
husband. Truth is, you will be picked up also and your children will suffer for it.
What to do? Ask him again, about your fears since you are his wife; if he still doesn't trust you enough to talk,
tell his folks about your fears and if he remains adamant, get your self outta the marriage before the police come calling.
As mamaput said, bloodmoney aint good business and you sure can do without it.
I sense you are not a praying person, so goodluck

@sundaqueen,the best tin 4 u to do is 2 push urself out or when the trouble comes callin e no go funny at all cos u might even be arrestd as an accomplice