Marriage Palaver
Well guys this just came to my mind based on some stories and the experiences of close friends and family.
Firstly I would like to ask this question – “When does love die?”
I cannot answer this question so I would like to throw it open so I can get answers and also to learn.
It is funny how two people claim to be in love, start dating, go through the courtship process and then decide to get married.
We also have the counselling sessions where the two people over a period of 3-6 months visit churches or mentors for guidance and teachings related to marriage.
Finally, the planning and preparation for the wedding starts. Once concluded, the D-Day comes and then the marriage begins.
From what I have heard there is no manual or handbook for marriage. We just hope that God takes control and it works out.
Suddenly, either husband or wife realizes that what they thought would be a perfect match made in heaven becomes a nightmare.
What I don’t understand is how it results into fighting and beating even to the extent of killing.
A lot of kids today are exposed to domestic violence which is really sad.
Some women choose to still stay in this kind of violent marriages with the hope that things would change. The funny thing is domestic violence goes both ways for both parties as some women are “men – beaters”.
So that is why I asked the question in the beginning – “When does love die” because if the two parties were so in love and inseparable at what point did things go wrong.
Some men or women start misbehaving right from the start. At times, we see the signs and just ignore hoping the erring party would change and turn a new leaf. In this case, most times the person even gets worse.
Also, some start changing after the kids start coming in. You start hearing things like
- She is too fat and out of shape
- She is not taking good care of herself
- She doesn’t dress well any longer etc.
The most painful aspect is that instead of calling your partner and discussing your grievances you keep quiet and find solace in the arms of another person or you start drinking, smoking and beating.
So back to domestic violence – I feel that one should be able to control your emotions no matter the circumstance. For example if your boss at work annoys you I’m sure you won’t raise your hands to give him/her a slap or a punch so why would you do it to someone you claim to love and promised for better or worse.
Some men become cranky once they are broke and decide to maltreat their wives and blame them for their misfortune instead of bracing up and looking for legit means to make money.
A lot people have ended up in coffins due to domestic violence. Yes the bible says the only reason for divorce should be sexual immorality but also the same holy book says thou shall not Kill.
If u end up killing your wife or husband you are a murderer and have sinned greatly against God.
I will stop by saying if anyone is going through physical and verbal assault especially physical assault it is advisable you separate and find a place to rethink and look for ways to move forward. It is better to stay alive and be hopeful than to be beaten to death.

Please feel free to drop your opinions , views and suggestions.
Thank you and God bless you all.
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Hmmmmmmm.....

hmmmmm

Good one but there are some points I think you would have emphasised that u did not e.g At what point does love die in a marriage relationship if there is anything like love dieing. Also the point you raised about hoping that our relationship partner will change(as far as am concerned most times people don't change, they simply change the form of their former misdeed). Only for them to turn worst. I commend your post

a bad marriage has its signs

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