solexybadoo:
I see nothing wrong in what the op said.. He was only trying to explain...
ITK too much for nairaland

He asked for help oga .... so i gave him my view. My reflection doesnt in any way align to your comments and thus does not make any logical sense ..perhaps u shud practice what u preach....u need more of your response to yourself.

AgreatMan:
Op needs to calm down, someday when she is no more around, this same attitude you hate is what you would wish she was there to give. You will miss that attitude, n will blame yourself for it.

No, he need not unless he's suffering from Stockholm Syndrome.
The truth is, what she's doing is not what one should agree with in anyone. You must understand and fight the sickness.

What your mother needs now is medical attention. Megalomania is a mental illness, if care is not taking it will be worsened in the future.

Annamma:
Hi fellow humans, my beloved mother is unknowingly forcing me to hate her. She has suddenly become megalomaniac.

She always want to have the final say in every issue not minding the feelings of others. She doesnt waste time to switch her allegiance and love to any of her children that has it big at the very moment..

She is in her 60s but always believe she knows the current things more than us. Immagine the torchlight Nokia phone we bought for her she cant even operate it well, but now telling us that we dont love her because we didnt buy android touchscreen phone for her to be browsing.
What is she going to browse? when she cant even communicate with english fluently.

You will teach her one thing for many months and even spend years doing serial correction for her, yet she wont get it right.

She is also very ungrateful... She lacks nothing as we timely assist her with upkeep allowances. My Dad still provide for all her daily needs too.

Nairalanders i cant even say much, infact i thought of committing suicide yesterday because of her unbearing attitude...

This megalomania is destroying the love i once had for her.
Pls what do i do as i have tried talking to her about this severally, only for the peaceful talks to snowball into a fiercing quarrell ofwhich it echo reaches the next day.

Pls what should i do?

Dear Op, please deal with any frustrations first. Then you can handle the issues.
Ask yourself questions you can answer. Take time to do this. You said you are very hardworking ,which means your could be under some pressure from work. Also, try to find out what other pressures that keep you irritated. You need to be systematic. Are you dealing with some forms of depression? You might need help yourself. From there you can handle your mum's issue. A person that is not "complete" in mind would find it difficult handling the slightest provocation. What is your relationship with other people? Did you just get out of some crisis? Please deal with this. If you can reduce contact with your mum for sometime do it. This is to avoid any silly reactions to her "attitude". Remember in the end there will always be a solution. Take it easy!

Buy her Innjoo or Itel, she will sell it herself..... But on a serious, she is your mother and she's getting old, just love her and bear everything. Since you do not stay together, it should be a relief for you.

Annamma:
Hi fellow humans, my beloved mother is unknowingly forcing me to hate her. She has suddenly become megalomaniac.

She always want to have the final say in every issue not minding the feelings of others. She doesnt waste time to switch her allegiance and love to any of her children that has it big at the very moment..

She is in her 60s but always believe she knows the current things more than us. Immagine the torchlight Nokia phone we bought for her she cant even operate it well, but now telling us that we dont love her because we didnt buy android touchscreen phone for her to be browsing.
What is she going to browse? when she cant even communicate with english fluently.

You will teach her one thing for many months and even spend years doing serial correction for her, yet she wont get it right.

She is also very ungrateful... She lacks nothing as we timely assist her with upkeep allowances. My Dad still provide for all her daily needs too.

Nairalanders i cant even say much, infact i thought of committing suicide yesterday because of her unbearing attitude...

This megalomania is destroying the love i once had for her.
Pls what do i do as i have tried talking to her about this severally, only for the peaceful talks to snowball into a fiercing quarrell ofwhich it echo reaches the next day.

Pls what should i do?

U sure say na ur mama? D money dat ur wasting on ur girlfriends never do to buy her Android even if she no sabi use am @least make she feel d joy.
Uno how much stress & BP u caused her when ur a kid?

All was well and good, until suddenly she changed, instead of tracing back to where the change started to know what triggered it and if possible, find solution for it, you are wanting to kii yourself?
Abeg, nor kii yourself, talk things over with her. Many moms are like that in naija.

My Brother my friend, "eni ti ija koba lo n pe ara re lokurin" meaning that "its the person that has not experience war that calls himself a man". When i read your post, i simply smile and said to myself "omode lo n se e", meaning "you haven't grown to become an adult yet, u are still a kid deep inside". Please dont get me wrong, i'm not in anyway abusing u or undermining ur efforts or calling u a kid literally. You might be 30 something years but it doesnt matter if u have not encountered this type of scenario in life.
Mega-whatever u call it, kindly wrap it with a piece of cloth and find the biggest chain to tie it then throw it in the deepest part of the ocean.
Your maturity is about to be tested with the most important human in your life and u want to back out, o serious. Let me enlighten you...

First of all, i thank God that u took notice of the change in your mum which it is called old age. When mums attain that very age of 60 something some change while some dont immediately. To u, it seems she has her mind in place and simply want to frustrate all ur efforts, thats a blatant lie, cos she's no longer her old self. She has metamorphosed into another being called OLD WOMAN/ AGED WOMAN. Life is like a cycle, we metamorphose from toddler to adult to old. The only part where human (especially women) retain their complete self is during the adulthood. The toddler stage and the old stage usually share the same similarities. And the older they get the more their behavior deteriorates into a toddler.
I beg u in the name of GOD, whatever she's doing now is not directly from her but influenced by her old age, hence u must be extremely patient with her the same way she was with u when u were a toddler and so annoying. You cannot tell me that u havent seen where u give ur phone to a toddler and he sees another persons phone and wants that one too, then he takes the two but couldnt use it together. But if u mistakenly touch the one he leaves beside him, he screams and tell u to put it back. That's exactly what they are.
At their old age the role between a child and mother is reversed and we have to treat them with utmost respect and patience just the same way they helped us grow into what we are today. Dont ever look down on her, u can get angry but dont let is turn into hatred for her. Think of the past and think of what she had gone through and done for you. I swear with God that made me, u can never repay her back with whatever u have even if u are as wealthy as dangote. You can never repay the 9months struggle, her sleepless nights, her hardwork for u to become a better person, the love she showered on u and every other efforts she has maintained on u. How many years has she become like this and u want to back out. Bad news for u, repay all i have said then back out if u think its possible.

In conclusion, seek for patience, be prayerful to God to continue to give u strength to do it and above all show unconditional love to her, it means regardless of what she does u will still be her number one. Do ur best now and be happy with it, cos a time will come, when she will not recognise u again and u will hate ur life for it. Be gentle be kind to her no matter what cos mums are the best thing that could ever happen to a childs life

EmmySparky:
i see...u also drag ur parents to public forums and publicly bombard them with all sorts of insultive words right?...continue...karma is definitely going to catch up with y'all ungrateful kids...u would one day have ur own kids...and hopefully they won't just say these things behind ur back but directly to ur face....mark my words...and for ur information...the places i have travelled to in my life time , i doubt if u would ever get there...

These are the kind of mentality that has made Africans backward. No rationalization whatsoever. Just interested in deifying their parents even when they need help! Bros, a lot of guys are going through such too. They're suffering in silence. And to even think that such can be cured or at least controlled is something that's cheering.
Abeg, if you have pressing issues of national discourse, bring am here ooooo! At least, no-one knows op. And pick intelligent response and do better solutions finding.

Annamma:
Hi fellow humans, my beloved mother is unknowingly forcing me to hate her. She has suddenly become megalomaniac.

She always want to have the final say in every issue not minding the feelings of others. She doesnt waste time to switch her allegiance and love to any of her children that has it big at the very moment..

She is in her 60s but always believe she knows the current things more than us. Immagine the torchlight Nokia phone we bought for her she cant even operate it well, but now telling us that we dont love her because we didnt buy android touchscreen phone for her to be browsing.
What is she going to browse? when she cant even communicate with english fluently.

You will teach her one thing for many months and even spend years doing serial correction for her, yet she wont get it right.

She is also very ungrateful... She lacks nothing as we timely assist her with upkeep allowances. My Dad still provide for all her daily needs too.

Nairalanders i cant even say much, infact i thought of committing suicide yesterday because of her unbearing attitude...

This megalomania is destroying the love i once had for her.
Pls what do i do as i have tried talking to her about this severally, only for the peaceful talks to snowball into a fiercing quarrell ofwhich it echo reaches the next day.

Pls what should i do?

Your mum might be having a midlife crisis...Its a reality when people begin to subconsciously question their relevance to society and their immediate environment as they get more physically frail. This makes them very irritable and feelings of abandonment will become prevalent. Growing up, my once loving mum became extremely irritable as she got older, getting angry over flimsy things. Here in Africa, parents are wired to believe that they must be the focal point of their children's lives, hence the obsession with respect and other shenanigans. In the case of my mum, she began to change when my siblings and I agreed to provide for her material needs but ignore her emotionally.
Also, forget all the idiotic comments I've been reading here. You have a right to seek help for an attitude change in someone you care about.

Sanchez01:
You shouldn't talk about your mum in this manner! Honestly, I perceive you had an improper upbringing. That explains why you would paint your mother in such horrible manner.

Well, since you want others to teach you on how to cope with her, then I'd give you the little I have...

1. You were very greedy and ungrateful at some point in life but she swallowed your insensitivity and catered for you, even though you have branded her a lazy bum.

2. You are grown/growing and have attained the stage of responsibility, kindly repay her without complaining.

3. Trust me, you might be repaid in the same vein, if you don't map out plans to learn to make her happy.

4. If you cannot handle a 'megalomanic' mother, how on God's earth would you be able handle a nagging girlfriend/wife, if you don't have one, that is?

5. Your mum is obsessed with exercising power because she feels abandoned, that is just about the only way for her to be noticed. The same applies to a child whose needs are not met. They become rebellious just so they could be understood.

6. Your understanding of the word 'care' and 'love' is quite disgraceful. 'Timely assistance' is not enough. How about someone to talk with often? I mean her children; those ones who don't live with her?

7. Going by your post, I could deduce that your level of disgust for her is on a serious high; the one reason you would like to take your own life.

8. Mothers are demi-gods. I see mine that way. You should learn to start seeing yours the same. Every right thinking son/daughter/child should know this. You cannot have an unhappy mother/father and expect your sailings to be smooth.

9. You are a bad child, the same applies to your siblings.

10. Establish the place of communication with her often. She is hell bent on frustrating you because something is not right. Seek to write the wrong.

11. If you can do the above, then do what you propose - to commit suicide.

Spot on

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This is a psychiatry thing OP.

Displaying anger towards your children because they didn't buy you android phone when you barely understand simple arithmetic is a psychiatric issue.

Take her to a psychologist and don't let anyone intimidate you with ignorance. Her action is plainly abnormal.

The level of ignorance as seen on this thread is the exact way Nigerians tag their grandparents witches and wizard.

It is not about the cost of phone or anything. It is simply a commonsense issue. Frustrating your own children because of android OS is not an issue to be overlooked. Look at it from a bigger picture. My parents are above that age, and the thought that you've not eaten breakfast at 12pm get them worried instantly. In a normal state of mind, your mom should be praying for you, wishing you success and even sacrificing much more than she has ever done before (if you still struggle to survive).

I know some parents who divided their gratuity and shared among their children.

No mother in her right state of mind forces her child to buy her anything!

Please do not let anyone beat you with ignorance! Take her to a psychiatrist before her attitude escalates into "witchcraft." The same ppl telling to do whatever she says on this thread would avoid your mom like a plague by the time people around her call her "WITCH".

If you choose to ignore my advice and follow the numerous repetitive comments from plain ignoramuses on this thread, you may live to regret it cos you haven't seen anything yet.

At 60, she should be enjoying her hubby and pension, not frustrating kids in their '20s and early '30s.

Don't let her weaknesses frustrate your wife when you eventually get married. I'm warning you ooo, you don't need to insult your mother but take the right step now!

Annamma:
Hi fellow humans, my beloved mother is unknowingly forcing me to hate her. She has suddenly become megalomaniac.

She always want to have the final say in every issue not minding the feelings of others. She doesnt waste time to switch her allegiance and love to any of her children that has it big at the very moment..

She is in her 60s but always believe she knows the current things more than us. Immagine the torchlight Nokia phone we bought for her she cant even operate it well, but now telling us that we dont love her because we didnt buy android touchscreen phone for her to be browsing.
What is she going to browse? when she cant even communicate with english fluently.

You will teach her one thing for many months and even spend years doing serial correction for her, yet she wont get it right.

She is also very ungrateful... She lacks nothing as we timely assist her with upkeep allowances. My Dad still provide for all her daily needs too.

Nairalanders i cant even say much, infact i thought of committing suicide yesterday because of her unbearing attitude...

This megalomania is destroying the love i once had for her.
Pls what do i do as i have tried talking to her about this severally, only for the peaceful talks to snowball into a fiercing quarrell ofwhich it echo reaches the next day.

Pls what should i do?

Make sure you do everything she ask of you for her and make her happy in all ways even if she doesn't appreciate all your effort keep doing it , she is your mother and she will always be till she leave no more.

Mumu! Did you just learn the word "megalomania". Your mum wants an android phone and wants every good thing she can have and you come one the internet to start writing rubbish. Your head is not correct.

I don't know why people now think they can use the internet for stupid things. The idiot is even saying her mum can't speak fluent English. Oloriburuku Omo ale jati jati...

Maybe she should have killed you and not waste her time and money bringing you up. May thunder fire that dirty hand you used in typing that rubbish. The mama wey born you na im you dey write this nonsense about . I wish I can see you and slap common sense into your brain

darbeelicous:
u don't love ur mother, u never did! When u have grown up kids, I'll understand more! Mtchewww.......
.
.
.
For now, karma is waiting for u!

He is her own karma.
Not every mother is sweet.
Some are actually uncaring and bitchy....

Just like not every father is a father....

The op knows best where the shoe pinches. Its easier to judge from the outsiders perspective.
A money hungry mother who loves any of her children who is having a big moment more than the others is a very unstable person and a money monger.
You can believe what you like tho.
Done.

proffemi:


I agree with you; OP has issues he needs to work on.

But it is important that everyone has a chance to get things off their chest, no matter how awful (every one of us nurses dark thoughts from time to time). The crux of our disagreement is that you think he's disgracing his mum by calling her out in public, but I'm saying he's anonymous, which allows him to get stuff off his chest without really embarrassing himself or her. Or do you know their identities?

he should aleast re-phrase his write up and show a little more constraint and respect in writing about his parent...i sometimes feel angry towards my parents though but i dont have the heart to say such things out...the conscience is a bitch...and trust me that bitch sure knows how to hold me down...it all balls down to self control...and i still think he should edit this shii he posted and apologize to his mum

willibounce1:
Mumu! Did you just learn the word "megalomania". Your mum wants an android phone and wants every good thing she can have and you come one the internet to start writing rubbish. Your head is not correct.

I don't know why people now think they can use the internet for stupid things. The idiot is even saying her mum can't speak fluent English. Oloriburuku Omo ale jati jati...

Maybe she should have killed you and not waste her time and money bringing you up. May thunder fire that dirty hand you used in typing that rubbish. The mama wey born you na im you dey write this nonsense about . I wish I can see you and slap common sense into your brain

Someone that has 3phones...
There is no excuse for being ungrateful.

Not all mothers are deserving of that tender love and care.

He is her own karma.

Kapishe

OP take your mum to a psychiatrist or psychologist... Don't mind all these ignorant people...


Try not to hate her though since you know it's some sort of mental illness...

Most of you on this page are sounding idiotic.
He or she never insulted his/her Mum. They came here with a problem and most of you are speaking out of your arses like you are a bad son, you are lazy, you are this. You all probably sound like this because you intend to be a pest to your kids when you are older. Its a stupid culture.
OP,You need to see if your Mum, is not senile, yes senility comes with old age but maybe she is aging faster, . If she is not senile then she is just being a greedy parasitic human being like a good number of Nigerians are. You choose to have children so it is your responsibility to provide for them until they become independent then they can fend for themselves. What you owe your parents is to take care of them when they are old and feeble, making sure they are well taken care of which it sound sliek you and your siblings are doing. It is not your fault that your mum is a greedy old woman trying to keep up with the times.
My suggestion...after you find out that her actions are not out of senility, make sure your parent's NEEDs are well taking care off. Notice I said need not want. Once in a while you indulge their excesses and buy a nice gift that is a want but let her understand that it is not an everyday thing.

If most of you commentators are sensible , you should know that it is not normal that a person would want to kill themselves because of their parent. There is something very wrong. His mum is a manipulator who uses her children for her benefit. Stop being sentimental here. If your Mum's greedy, attitude continues, keep her at arms length. NO need having two crazy people at home. I am sure people will tell you, ah she may curse you etc. That is bullshit. Only you can curse yourself. Provided you obeyed all God's principles, her curses will bounce of your skin like water on a ducks back....( I am assuming you are a Christian and believes in the Bible)

Good luck.....And apply wisdom to your actions. Don't go the African extreme way of trying to kiil yourself and living a miserable life to make your Mum happy and don't go the Oyibo people's extreme of totally cutting off your parents, never seeing or talking to them. Shalom

Olufemiolaolu:
Ur mum is ur mum no matter what. Keep on loving her & pray DAT God changes her kk. Agba bowa kan e. I.e you too will become old one day. Sow a good seed today.

Bro, some mums are abusing the emboldened. We have heard of cases where mums treat their daughters-in-law as slaves especially when they enjoy 100% loyalty of their sons. Some mums don't even want their sons to marry for selfish interest. Imagine, ur mum don't want u to have children just the way she has u that she is making trouble with. There are even extreme cases where mums kill their children for money. So, I should allow her to DELIBERATELY ruin my life? Nothing pains the heart and soul like ingratitude for God's sake. God created man and if you worship Him well, He puts u in Paradise, at least that is appreciation from THE ALMIGHTY CREATOR not to talk of mum who was created. Abeg leave some matter jawe.

Acidosis:
This is a psychiatry thing OP.

Displaying anger towards your children because they didn't buy you android phone when you barely understand simple arithmetic is a psychiatric issue.

Take her to a psychologist and don't let anyone intimidate you with ignorance. Her action is plainly abnormal.

The level of ignorance as seen on this thread is the exact way Nigerians tag their grandparents witches and wizard.

It is not about the cost of phone or anything. It is simply a commonsense issue. Frustrating your own children because of android OS is not an issue to be overlooked. Look at it from a bigger picture. My parents are above that age, and the thought that you've not eaten breakfast at 12pm get them worried instantly. In a normal state of mind, your mom should be praying for you, wishing you success and even sacrificing much more than she has ever done before (if you still struggle to survive).

I know some parents who divided their gratuity and shared among their children.

No mother in her right state of mind forces her child to buy her anything!

Please do not let anyone beat you with ignorance! Take her to a psychiatrist before her attitude escalates into "witchcraft." The same ppl telling to do whatever she says on this thread would avoid your mom like a plague by the time people around her call her "WITCH".

Most intelligent comment so far. His mum is having a midlife crisis. Irrational feelings of being "left out", however unjustified, is a characteristic of midlife crisis. 80percent of the comments on this thread are just plain stupid. Respect should be reciprocal....whining over a phone is plain selfish. There are parents who get involved in diabolical and occultic activities just to have their way with their kids. The wrong sense of entitlement is VERY African, if you ask me.

Olabestonic001:



These are the kind of mentality that has made Africans backward. No rationalization whatsoever. Just interested in deifying their parents even when they need help! Bros, a lot of guys are going through such too. They're suffering in silence. And to even think that such can be cured or at least controlled is something that's cheering.
Abeg, if you have pressing issues of national discourse, bring am here ooooo! At least, no-one knows op. And pick intelligent response and do better solutions finding.

lol i hate that trend ...na to pray make dollar come down or make naira increase its worth be the most important political issue now o...buhari palava no dey my mind again...

Hector09:
Bro i fell ur pain, my mum is like that thou she's 40 yr, bt she nage alot, nothing pleases her, always comparing u with other guys, thou am just 23yrs bt i hate her. To be honest

lmaooooooo
nagging mums

Annamma:

Not now that you are enjoying your mum, i pray she doesnt develop megalomania. I was once the apple of my mum's eye. I never believed i could one day thought of killing myself because of my mum's unbearing attitude. pray it doesnt happen to you Mr Good boy.

MAke money


make more money
make xces money



all u need is money

Zedoo:


Someone that has 3phones...
There is no excuse for being ungrateful.

Not all mothers are deserving of that tender love and care.

He is her own karma.

Kapishe

Any mother who can take good care of you from cradle to adulthood deserves everything you can give her. If only you can get a full video of how you must ha troubled your mother from cradle to adulthood and how she did everything in her power to make you happy, you won't come online and be saying nonsense about your mother. If you don't have money to give her what she wants, say it not coming online to say your mother is ungrateful because she asked for a better phone. Na beans make your parents take care of you from age zero to the level when you begin to make money? If she wants anything, buy it an if you don't have the money shut up and let her know. So what do you want NL to do. The mumu OP even say him wan commit suicide. Na wa

I feel ur pain bro. Most of this people insulting you haven't witness such scenarios, nothing could be more painful like a megalomanic mum.

U must calm down. I don't knw ur financial status but u and ur other siblings must still keep on providing all she needs or even the one she don't need, example she said she needed an android phone please buy 4 herand many other stuffs u knw she wouldn't be able to use,her situation islike achild who cry for every toys no even bothered money is use tobuying them. The only solution is to learn to love her that way, see itas a wayof life besidesshe is old. Just have fun with it and always call almost every day to check on her

willibounce1:
Mumu! Did you just learn the word "megalomania". Your mum wants an android phone and wants every good thing she can have and you come one the internet to start writing rubbish. Your head is not correct.

I don't know why people now think they can use the internet for stupid things. The idiot is even saying her mum can't speak fluent English. Oloriburuku Omo ale jati jati...

Maybe she should have killed you and not waste her time and money bringing you up. May thunder fire that dirty hand you used in typing that rubbish. The mama wey born you na im you dey write this nonsense about . I wish I can see you and slap common sense into your brain

We know your type. Future pests who will stop at nothing to make their kids their ATM machines. See the way you are spitting insults like a garage boy. Can't you comment without sounding like a drunkard?

Quran say : your Lord has made this decision so that you should not worship any other than Him and be GOOD TO YOUR PARENTS.

showstopa:
Most of you on this page are sounding idiotic.
He or she never insulted his/her Mum. They came here with a problem and most of you are speaking out of your arses like you are a bad son, you are lazy, you are this. You all probably sound like this because you intend to be a pest to your kids when you are older. Its a stupid culture.
OP,You need to see if your Mum, is not senile, yes senility comes with old age but maybe she is aging faster, . If she is not senile then she is just being a greedy parasitic human being like a good number of Nigerians are. You choose to have children so it is your responsibility to provide for them until they become independent then they can fend for themselves. What you owe your parents is to take care of them when they are old and feeble, making sure they are well taken care of which it sound sliek you and your siblings are doing. It is not your fault that your mum is a greedy old woman trying to keep up with the times.
My suggestion...after you find out that her actions are not out of senility, make sure your parent's NEEDs are well taking care off. Notice I said need not want. Once in a while you indulge their excesses and buy a nice gift that is a want but let her understand that it is not an everyday thing.

If most of you commentators are sensible , you should know that it is not normal that a person would want to kill themselves because of their parent. There is something very wrong. His mum is a manipulator who uses her children for her benefit. Stop being sentimental here. If your Mum's greedy, attitude continues, keep her at arms length. NO need having two crazy people at home. I am sure people will tell you, ah she may curse you etc. That is bullshit. Only you can curse yourself. Provided you obeyed all God's principles, her curses will bounce of your skin like water on a ducks back....( I am assuming you are a Christian and believes in the Bible)

Good luck.....And apply wisdom to your actions. Don't go the African extreme way of trying to kiil yourself and living a miserable life to make your Mum happy and don't go the Oyibo people's extreme of totally cutting off your parents, never seeing or talking to them. Shalom

May God reward u for making this bold comment despite the hypocrisy so far displayed by most commentators. Some of them don't even know how their parents survive and they are here condemning this dude for his openness despite his efforts to make his mum happy.

Thank God for Mothers, what can we ever do without them. As someone with a bit of experience into what you might have witnessed, here is my 50 kobo. Learn to keep shut, you really can never win in any of such discussions or arguments as your case may be. A lot of Mothers become more dominating and controlling as they age, it comes with the territory.

Katyusha:
We know your type. Future pests who will stop at nothing to make their kids their ATM machines. See the way you are spitting insults like a garage boy. Can't you comment without sounding like a drunkard?

Your father is a drunkard. Wretched MF. Spending money on your mother is problem. But your type will buy iPhone 7 for your girl friend. Anoufia.