Football vs Sex.
1. Going to your bf/gf without being invited = OFFSIDE.
2. Dating a girl today and having sex on the same day = FREE-KICK.
3. Condom = GOALKEEPER
4. Condom breaks = PENALTY
5. Abortion = RED CARD
6. A girl with lots of energy = CAPTAIN
7. Having sex without a condom = OWN GOAL
8. Taking a lot of time without coming = MAN OF THE MATCH.
9.Banging 3 girls in a day = HAT-TRICK.
10. Having many chicks and banging all = MVP
11. Having sex with your ex = FRIENDLY MATCH
12. 8 years of sex without getting a child = ARSENAL
13. After 2 rounds, u request for more =EXTRA TIME.
14. Taking it gently when having sex = FAIR PLAY
15. Biting her n!pples = SUAREZ
16.Two legs on shoulder = THROWIN
17. Asking her 'how do you want it' = Taking instructions on the sideline.
18. A lady using pills after sex and later still got pregnant = DEFENSIVE ERROR
19.Girl being pregnant = GoOoOoOallllll and man running away= disqualification
20.Ur guy collect ur girl= True pass
21.Having sex with a girl..and your mum open d door= Injury
22.You and your girl break up= Game over
23. Girl tell u to stop= YELLOW CARD
24. Turning ur girlfriend to your wife= full time play
Pls single guys play full time and enjoy ur marriage.

op just made my evening


#manofthematch #positivevibes

Mod, pls move to the appropriate destination

Its wack