Since lots of people have been struggling with long distance relationships lately, and people have been giving differing opinions on how to handle them, this is a post for all those who are currently in LDR's to give tips and advice to those finding them hard. This isn't a place to judge, it is a place to come and whinge about missing your partner and to get advice on how to cope if you are about to start a LDR. Girls, if you are in one, it's time to share your useful secrets on how to cope. ***

No rules can be laid down in LDR. If its meant to be it will be. Communication is the topmost thing dat should never be left out in ldr.

Communicate well and dont dont be hash

skfa1:

Communicate well and dont dont be hash

I could say "WORD" a thousand times over, especially the harsh aspect.

Strong will and communicatn. Also,dnt xpect a 50-50 level of commitmnt especially 4rm d gal (gals fìnd it diff 2 over-commit themselvs in a rtnshp). To do dis, 1 party (d guy) mst suck 2 make tins go on. She may nt cal u as often bt jst try 2 kip up wit dt. I'm in one,nd dis hs kept us going. Lastly, avoid talking 2 lng on fone. Let ur talkin nt exceed 10mins at a stretch,nd avoid 9t calls.

I cant just understand why people keep describing humans as if they are describing machines. The most complex things God created is beyond theories especially those not properly observed or observed by amateurs. In my OWN OPINION it is even girls that talk more than guys and several counsellors and psychologists including Norman wright, Bimbo Odukoya, have stated this. And this one that you said he should avoid long calls, he had better prepare for it because as far as the girl loves you and knows that you care, she must tell you everything that happened everyday. Where I work, in the first year (our training period) several of the guys had long distance relationship and they had to talk, sometimes for hours, least of them was like 30 minutes, they enjoyed it and today most of them are married. Somebody wants to tell you about her day, what he/she likes and some other stuff you know, some love discussions and you say 10 mins. But pls that one of night calls, dont even try it. Unless if your girl is one cheap girl with nothing to do the next day even at that dont try it.

@tunene, u knw u cnt compare talkin on fone wit talkin face-to-face,nd take or leave it, anytin u say outside 10mins is idle talk. And mind u, wat i said ws 10mins at a stretch nd nt jst 10mins per day. Of course,u shuld cal ur gal as often as u cn daily bt in my own opinion,talkin 4 lng at a stretch mite end on a sour note. Dis is 4rm my own xperience sha.

You have to be very open, you need to tell the other person that you're thinking of them and missing them. I always tell my fella really little silly things that I see during the day that make me smile, just makes us both feel that little bit closer and feel like she's an important part of my life. And I always text her to say goodnight and she brought me a teddy which is sprayed with her aftershave that smells and reminds me of her. +++ We are in touch everyday phone/txt/email and send the odd surprise love letter. +++ We meet up when we can, but its hard at times but we keep going.+++ I guess everyone copes differently, its hard work but its worth it when you see their smile when you see them again.:-x

Out of sight is out of mind

@toba, I dont think this thread is for you, so, you better drop or re-read the post and get the gist though. . .

If u want my candid advise, i belive its a waste of time. But come 2 tink of it,

sometimes it depends on d people involved. like in my own case, i gave it my all

i strived hard 2 ensure it worked out but d reverse was d case. I think it cld hv wrked

out if he was as dedicated as i was well if u re in any just pray ur partner isnt deceivin u.

lol

@hairat007,,,baby i agree with you, ,,am into one at the moment and infact,its hell for me because my partner is not helping matters, ,really putting effort to ensure it works but baby i have to make a decision, ,,,to me the whole thing is scrap, God helps oooooooo

COMMUNICATION helps alot and trust too. And ofcos you should visit each other atleast 3-4x/yr. That is all.

You all yarning crap abt long distance not worth it, just make me laugh. Cos in my opinion u seem under-aged or maybe less mentally matured. There's no how u can exclude long distance in a relationship. Case scenerio is maybe u both met at school e.g lautech,ogbomosho, she's younger than u, stil in school and u av graduated and working already in lagos. Wat will u do? Change school for her? Or another case scenerio, u go for nysc in the east for a year and she is here in the southwest,will u then quit the relationship? The main thing is Trust, Trust, and Trust, communication and love for eachother and most importantly the 'nature' of both parties involved. Even if u stay with ur gf under the same roof like husband and wife, u can be distant at heart, which is worse. And moreover, her being in the shortest possible distance,i mean even sleeping with u on the same bed,does not guarantee she won't cheat on u if she wants to and/or wired to cheat. QED.