akaahs:
I am here to read from d gurus ND d expert

dajoaneke:
Good day NL family. I greet you and hope you are doing great? If so, doxology
I would like your advice on on marital issues as I have never been married before,the step towards such endeavor is new to me.



1 > I met my girlfriend 6 months ago and she's not that kind of girl a reasonable man would toy with. I love her (we're in love). I want to surprise her with a marriage proposal, but I want to know if I should introduce myself to her family first, get to know the family first hand and get the father's blessing?



2 > She's met with my family, best friend with my mom & my family love her so much. All is good to go but my salary. I cannot afford a Nigerian wedding (things are starting to pick up for me but still...) Question is, If she says yes to my proposal, how long is a proposal duration before the ring will become a handcuff? [b]My response : As long as you can be financially ready for wedding and family upkeep, since u say things are picking up[/b]



3 > Lastly, If she says "yes" to me & her family say's no; does the ring stay with her or it should be returned (It's the reason for my question No.1)
My response: .. Nowadays, parents will agree to an average guy normally... But I'm sure they will accept u ... If they don't , then move on ......


Marriage is a delicate process I believe. I don't want to ask my siblings these questions, hence they might amebo* it to her
I would appreciate matured response from married and single alike. If you are single & want to display crass humor please try the next post
Thanks

folakemigeh:
You just met her 6 months is too early for marriage. At least a year is okay.

You need to know the woman you are about to get married to very well if not you will be running to me.

Benita27:
My opinion.

You propose marriage to her first. If she says "Yes" you demand to see her parents to make your intentions known. She'll inform her parents and they'll give her the go ahead to invite you over. Depending on how soon you'd want it to take place, you'll be asked to come over on a second visit with your people for introduction and the taking of list.

If she says "Yes" and her family says "No". You can either ask her to keep the ring or return it, while she could either decide to keep it or return it...don't be stingy, ask her to keep it, and let her say "No".

dajoaneke:
Good day NL family. I greet you and hope you are doing great? If so, doxology
I would like your advice on on marital issues as I have never been married before, the step towards such endeavor is new to me.

1 > I met my girlfriend 6 months ago and she's not that kind of girl a reasonable man would toy with. I love her (we're in love). I want to surprise her with a marriage proposal, but I want to know if I should introduce myself to her family first, get to know the family first hand and get the father's blessing?

2 > She's met with my family, best friend with my mom & my family love her so much. All is good to go but my salary. I cannot afford a Nigerian wedding (things are starting to pick up for me but still...) Question is, If she says yes to my proposal, how long is a proposal duration before the ring will become a handcuff?

3 > Lastly, If she says "yes" to me & her family say's no; does the ring stay with her or it should be returned (It's the reason for my question No.1)

Marriage is a delicate process I believe. I don't want to ask my siblings these questions, hence they might amebo* it to her
I would appreciate matured response from married and single alike. If you are single & want to display crass humor please try the next post
Thanks

dajoaneke:
Good day NL family. I greet you and hope you are doing great? If so, doxology
I would like your advice on on marital issues as I have never been married before, the step towards such endeavor is new to me.

1 > I met my girlfriend 6 months ago and she's not that kind of girl a reasonable man would toy with. I love her (we're in love). I want to surprise her with a marriage proposal, but I want to know if I should introduce myself to her family first, get to know the family first hand and get the father's blessing?

2 > She's met with my family, best friend with my mom & my family love her so much. All is good to go but my salary. I cannot afford a Nigerian wedding (things are starting to pick up for me but still...) Question is, If she says yes to my proposal, how long is a proposal duration before the ring will become a handcuff?

3 > Lastly, If she says "yes" to me & her family say's no; does the ring stay with her or it should be returned (It's the reason for my question No.1)

Marriage is a delicate process I believe. I don't want to ask my siblings these questions, hence they might amebo* it to her
I would appreciate matured response from married and single alike. If you are single & want to display crass humor please try the next post
Thanks

tobianthony:
First , congrats for having someone you love .

Secondly before you propose to a woman ... Always wait for the honeymoon phase to pass first .

By honey moon phase I mean that new love burst of adrenaline rush which is nullified by a harsh dose of reality .

I made the same mistake myself ...

If you propose to this lady today let me tell you what will happen next ...

Your countdown to introduction will begin ... Thereafter pressure to do introduction and then traditional and white wedding .

I don't know her or you but trust me ...most ladies want a relatively big wedding .

As you guys start to plan your wedding et all ...you will start to notice that -

1. Your financial principles are at variance .


However my dude ...if I hear that you take a loan to get married I will be angry and disappointed with you .

oloriooko:


Marriage is serious biz, so serious that the faint hearted will fall by the road side.
1. Note that the main persons in this is you and the lady after which comes the family. What the 2 of you want is important and six months is good enough for courtship
2. Good she's known and accepted by your family but you've got to propose to her first b4 making move to see her family cuz after wedding it's going to be only 2 of you under same roof.
3. Weddings are always over hyped in Nigeria as if it's a competition. Plan your wedding with your sweetheart and make it within a reasonable budget and don't forget help will also come to you. The most important thing is to wisely save money for you two so after wedding you have enough to start life with.
4. Being in love is very good but marriage needs far more than that. Let your love produce patience, trust and more love towards your spouse. Dating someone is totally different from living under same roof. You will start noticing certain features which may irritate you or even drive you to start seeing your spouse in another light but you must exercise a lot of patience and never raise your hand to beat your wife, NEVER!

Finally, marriage requires a lot of work and tons of patience and understanding. Marriage will not build itself but the two of you will do.
Wish you the best and think hard b4 going into it

MissRaine69:
Be honest from the get go.
You have to meet her family that's imperative. Talk to her and agree on a budget agree on the duration on how long you want to wait before you get married once you propose. You may choose to tell her famliy of the proposed date but be aware once you propose there are expectations so be realistic.
Love can make us blind so before your ability to reason goes meet her family get to know then then propose if that's what you want to do.

tobianthony:
To the third question _ when my engagement fell through ... I told her to keep the ring .

I couldn't bear to have it back ... I never asked what she did with it .

How someone can sell an engagement ring is beyond me .

See my guy marriage is the true test of love .

Once you can master finances in your relationship you are 50% there .

If you are making 1.2 million a year and she's making 1.2 million a year and the budget for your wedding is 2 million ...it's either there's something wrong or right with somebody's brain some where .

Well what do I know my guy ... I'm just a man like you still learning .

All the best .

dajoaneke:
Thank you. The Nigerian wedding syndrome is the scariest part. Some people will finish wedding and have nothing left over for marriage proper. That will not be my case by God's grace. Also, marriage in northern Nigeria is not as expensive as East, South & West. Did I mention she's a northerner?

iweecureyou:
Sinple




















Turn Gay i wee maried u and payed for grooms prise

dajoaneke:
Sorry to hear about the woes of your failed relationship. I believe the best will come. It would be proper to return a ring than dispose of it. Also, I also believe that one has to cut their coat according to material available.

dajoaneke:
A whole new perspective. Sounds very reasonable. Unorthodox method. I like the idea