Melodyz:



Do you feel that Is the appropriate thing to do?

I feel d man in question is not responsible enough even if he is in financial crisis, dere is way of talking runs out wit ur spouse dat can sort tins out amicably, so advice ur sister to dissolve d marriage through d appropriate channel n move on wit her life.

She should get a proper divorce and she can choose to do whatever she wants.
Advice her to get a divorce, it's obvious the marriage ended a long time ago

In as much as it's the duty of a man to provide for his family I don't think there is a law that says a woman can't. As long as no case of domestic violence she should have remained with her husband and kids,I don't understand why she sent her son to him?To learn his bad habits like smoking and drinking. It would have been better for her to stay and bring her kids up properly. For the cheating aspect I guess she is enjoying it maybe it's part of her if not some women will leave their husbands and still not cheat rather work harder to make more money.

omogin:

See your mouth like flex. Come flex am na, make she share misfortune give you. You wan go heaven o, but you think say na anyhow them dey live life.

Ewo! Anty don vex with me.

After taking care of the children for long, the man will come back and make peace with the children and they will accept their dad back which she can't do anything about.

nrexzy:
Advise her oo or even report her to d husband

A man who cannot take care of his family is worse than an infidel... Is that one a husband?... I do not support what the lady is doing.. As she is still legally married... But that man of a husband should just go amd hide his face biko

Amberon11:
How hard is it being a man? Do you know the pain of child bearing is the second worst pain a human being can experience ? The first being getting burnt alive.

The op's sister is a very string woman. If after all she went through in her previous marriage she still had the courage to move on and is now financially independent then she is truly a strong independent woman.

The man is loser.

Well, we the men carry the babies too before giving y’all to keep for 9 month. I agree with you that child bearing is painful but it still doesn’t have anything related to being a man.

The frustration a man goes thru is way more than that of a woman. Women have higher advantages, at least someone will come around to cater for her needs and men on the other hand don’t have such luck.

pweetiedee:


Hanty, I don't understand you.

Please what should she do to make him change or save her marriage. Tell me, so that I can advice anyone I find in her situation.

thanks in advance.

A lady asking this question, so if u were d one, u don't knw what to do or u will also run away like d woman?. OK o

Melodyz:



Going to a year now, the husband has never for once asked about his daughter, his son that is with him sef has no formal textbooks they use in school and my sis refuses to send to him to buy textbooks for him, saying he is his responsibility

tell her to bring the boy back to her
otherwise she would contribute to the problem of the boy
he could be her future

D truth is, she is frustrated of d man's attitude and Dats y she left him.... Its not easy for a man alone to carry such responsibility not to talk of a woman and d man is no way responsible
Op: he should stop using his manhood til he's ready to face d outcome of it D

bamidelee:

tell her to bring the boy back to her
otherwise she would contribute to the problem of the boy
he could be her future

I agree with you. That’d be the greatest mistake of her life.

Mhizrohzz:
D truth is, she is frustrated of d man's attitude and Dats y she left him.... Its not easy for a man alone to carry such responsibility not to talk of a woman and d man is no way responsible
Op: he should stop using his manhood til he's ready to face d outcome of it D

I wish it was that easy. Lol

Why can't women also take responsibility in the house? Soon they will be shouting gender and inequality. Even the so called financially independent Women no reach to take care of the family. Self made my foot.

Melodyz:
It's a very long story but let me cut it short

Back in my secondary days my sister got married to a man from Imo state, within two years they gave birth to two beautiful daughters (twins), few months after giving birth the husband was diagnosed with eye cancer, which after much treatment he passed away.

The families of the man refused my sister of everything, they went as far as telling her to go away with the kids, that they are evil, that they want nothing to do with her and the children. So she came back home, my parents tried everything possible to resolve the issue but to no avail, so we accepted the kids as ours, they even started bearing our last name.

Few years later a man asked for my sister's hand in marriage, like two to three years into the marriage she gave birth to a boy and a girl, by then I was already schooling in UNN and I normally don't travel back home constantly. She calls at times to ask how I was doing and sometimes complains of how her husband doesn't bring money for anything in the house, that she is the one that pays for everything concerning the kids schooling, that she can count the number of times her husband brings money for paying of rent and for feeding.

She reported him to his people but nothing was done, after much complaining she said she's not interested in the marriage anymore, some of our family members advise her not to leave the marriage that is not right via her being married before, but she refused, that she can't be the man in the house by taking care of everything that they (the husband and her) should be doing together. So she went ahead to rent her own apartment and brought along her the two kids, few months after moving out her husband was evicted for failing to pay his rent.

I graduated this year and decided to go visit her and from there find something doing before I leave for service, on my reaching there I asked her what is happening via her marriage, she told me that since she moved here her husband has never for once asked of the kids, even to send money for their upkeep he has not done it, so out of anger he sent his son to him as he is the eldest, to take care of him.

Since I got to her house there is this guy that visits her and calls her constantly, she even visits him almost if not every night.

I want to talk to her about it, so everyone in the house please what can I do? Should I stay mute or not? If not, what should I tell her?

You're the definition of ignorant

Melodyz:

some of our family members advise her not to leave the marriage that is not right via her being married before, but she refused.

I asked her what is happening via her marriage?

First, the way you use the word VIA is very wrong. Go and check up the meaning.

Secondly, what do you expect from a woman staying alone? These things happen. Only women with good behaviours and fear of God can stay away from adultery.

divorce isnt save either for it is written in the bible: for any man or woman who divorces his/her partner has equally committed the sin of adultry... faithfulness is the best and she should honor the marriage she got herself into

9ja woman and their wahala. the moment their husband begins to face financial challenges. there become something else. there tag him mr drunkard or smoker.lol

Melodyz:



Going to a year now, the husband has never for once asked about his daughter, his son that is with him sef has no formal textbooks they use in school and my sis refuses to send to him to buy textbooks for him, saying he is his responsibility

Pls tell her to go and take her son bcz he's going to turn into another thing. Save the little boy life pls

jtofineme:
9ja woman and their wahala. the moment their husband begins to face financial challenges. there become something else. there tag him mr drunkard or smoker.lol

No be lie.

so true

Melodyz:




Seriously I don't want to Invade her space, and besides I'm graduate but have no experience via marriage stuffs.... I don't see it as a big of a deal asking those sort of questions

why do you like using the word "via"?
do you even know the meaning at all?


back to the topic
mind your business, read 1 Thessalonians 4:11

Abbey2sam:


why do you like using the word "via"?
do you even know the meaning at all?


back to the topic
mind your business, read 1 Thessalonians 4:11

You forgot to tell her to read the passage in the Bible via the New Testament.

Benita27:
What was the so called husband expecting when he failed to be responsible to his wife and kids?. As far as I'm concerned, they stopped being married long ago, perhaps you think she's still married 'cause they've not divorced legally. That being said, if you're concerned about her life I'm sure she'll ask you to mind your business 'cause she's an adult.

Intelligent.... Abeg chop knuckle....

Are you sure you're a graduate? ?

kennygee:


She married an irresponsible man, I'll advice separation, not divorce tho.

When they were giving doing one corner, she didn’t know he was irresponsible.

fuckumods:
Please work on ur written English... It sucks!!!

That’s our graduate of the federal republic of Nigeria.

sKy007:
The man could not even pay his rent which means that he is seriously financially handicap, therefore for the wife to leave him at such instances shows that she is not understanding

both are not understanding, the should be able to talk to the woman in the way she can understand, or maybe there's no love in the marriage, and above all they ain't close to God.

TreasuredLeidy:
What has she done to make the man a better husband? If she cnt do anything to make her marriage work, then She should divorce properly if she doesn't want to b tagged a B*tch.. What insolence
@op, talk sense into her head, i cnt believe a graduate is asking this question.

Two heads are better than one

Let her get a divorce n also talk to her about her relationship cos it would b bad for her reputation if she is seen going from one man to another.let her b sure for once if he is going to start a relationship n put it into prayers

Melodyz:
It's a very long story but let me cut it short

Back in my secondary days my sister got married to a man from Imo state, within two years they gave birth to two beautiful daughters (twins), few months after giving birth the husband was diagnosed with eye cancer, which after much treatment he passed away.

The families of the man refused my sister of everything, they went as far as telling her to go away with the kids, that they are evil, that they want nothing to do with her and the children. So she came back home, my parents tried everything possible to resolve the issue but to no avail, so we accepted the kids as ours, they even started bearing our last name.

Few years later a man asked for my sister's hand in marriage, like two to three years into the marriage she gave birth to a boy and a girl, by then I was already schooling in UNN and I normally don't travel back home constantly. She calls at times to ask how I was doing and sometimes complains of how her husband doesn't bring money for anything in the house, that she is the one that pays for everything concerning the kids schooling, that she can count the number of times her husband brings money for paying of rent and for feeding.

She reported him to his people but nothing was done, after much complaining she said she's not interested in the marriage anymore, some of our family members advise her not to leave the marriage that is not right via her being married before, but she refused, that she can't be the man in the house by taking care of everything that they (the husband and her) should be doing together. So she went ahead to rent her own apartment and brought along her the two kids, few months after moving out her husband was evicted for failing to pay his rent.

I graduated this year and decided to go visit her and from there find something doing before I leave for service, on my reaching there I asked her what is happening via her marriage, she told me that since she moved here her husband has never for once asked of the kids, even to send money for their upkeep he has not done it, so out of anger he sent his son to him as he is the eldest, to take care of him.

Since I got to her house there is this guy that visits her and calls her constantly, she even visits him almost if not every night.

I want to talk to her about it, so everyone in the house please what can I do? Should I stay mute or not? If not, what should I tell her?

How is that cheating? WETIN CONCERN YOU?

snowblaq:

A man who cannot take care of his family is worse than an infidel... Is that one a husband?... I do not support what the lady is doing.. As she is still legally married... But that man of a husband should just go amd hide his face biko

I thought d marriage vow is for better for worst...