Good day my people, l need your mature advice on an issue please.
I am a 24 years old deaf guy(l have total hearing loss on both ears), self employed and financially stable, I work as a male hairstylist in in a shop of my own, I used to find it very difficult to get on well with people of the opposite sex mainly because of my hearing loss which diminish my confidence a lot as it undermine my conversation with normal people (l communicate primarily by lip reading and I don't understand sign language ), I was never born deaf but by an unfortunate mistake when I was young so I was never brought up with sign language. The hearing loss affected my education severely which was why l gave up pursuing higher education as my only option was a university for the deaf and l don'tt understand sign language (and l was never willing to learn sign language cos I choose to live like a normal person ).
Long story short, I dropped out of SS2 after falling the promotion examination to SS3 (first time I have ever failed an academic examination ) this is because SS2 appears to be the limit my deafness can endure in a school for normal hearing people (l became deaf while in basic 6), l decide to learn a trade so as to be useful to myself. Fast forward am now a boss with my own apprentice and my business is doing pretty well.
I no longer fear to approach a girl due to my new found confidence of been a boss and financially comfortable, although there are still some of them who still play hard to get(l get the feeling they end up rejecting cos I rarely ask them to be friends with me more than three times, l flip them the fvck off by stopping asking them out, the life of a confident boss..... Lol ).
The thing is that l rarely ever want to get serious with any girl for now even after they accept to be friends with me because I have a goal of at least laying a foundation for my future home and been super comfortable before l get serious with any girl(virtually all my senior brothers have built houses and I want to follow in their footsteps ).
Unfortunately, this dream of mine is nowhere near been fulfilled until maybe in three years time(l have a plan for it and am pursuing it vigorously ), I get the feeling that having a girlfriend now may derail me from the plan as l feel a sweet relationship requires resources(money, time and attention ) to flourish and I feel l had better deploy those resources to achieving my dream first.
I had be happy to have a girlfriend who isn't so demanding and who supports my dreams and is prepared to stay with me for a long time but unfortunately such girls are very rare, so am surrounded by the typical naija girls lol.
And been single has its downsides which includes the feeling of loneliness and want to feel loved, this also means that I am still a virgin at 24 years(l have been contemplating breaking it with prostitutes but they sort of disgust me ).
The dream of building a home is taking a long time to release which is normal, and I am also losing patience and the situation is not helped by the fact that the few friends l have all got girlfriends and even my 21 years old younger brother with all the sweet sex that comes with it.
Am a bit confused.
Matured advice please.
N.B: please ignore my deafness(l have accept it as my fate so no need to suggest trying hearing aids as l already did at different hospitals ). Thanks.

Register for Pastor Chris' healing school first. . .

plavic:
Register for Pastor Chris' healing school first. . .

like I said earlier, I have accepted it as my fate but thanks all the same

plavic:
Register for Pastor Chris' healing school first. . .

u believe all those gimmicks, if they are real yinka ayefele, cobhams and dat dat blind boy in flavours song wud have been healed. pastor wey no fit save hin marriage na him go save op, naso. mr Op get a gal if u want to and stop ur assumptions, assertions and permutations

Wow! indeed you are the boss, u seem to be doing more than OK for a guy of your age, at 24 you can barely count the number of guys that already has a life, Career or vocation of their own.

Don't make the mistake of giving out your virginity to a prostitute, I tell you it won't be your last time of visiting them and you will eventually get addicted to that life.

And to be honest at 24 you should already be thinking of a stable relationship cos this will even keep u more focus and erase every thoughts of ever having to patronise a brothel and keeping one is not that tedious, hectic and financially draining as you think, you just have to define the relationship from the onset that's all.

inbtw you only maintain a relationship not a girlfriend.

I admire you tenancity broda, wish all disabled can be optimistic as you.. my advice for you is to get a babe that's not too dependent, and pursue ur dreams.

iyketex007:
Wow! indeed you are the boss, u seem to be doing more than OK for a guy of your age, at 24 you can barely count the number of guys that already has a life, Career or vocation of their own.

Don't make the mistake of giving out your virginity to a prostitute, I tell you it won't be your last time of visiting them and you will eventually get addicted to that life.

And to be honest at 24 you should already be thinking of a stable relationship cos this will even keep u more focus and erase every thoughts of ever having to patronise a brothel and keeping one is not that tedious, hectic and financially draining as you think, you just have to define the relationship from the onset that's all.

inbtw you only maintain a relationship not a girlfriend.

Thanks bro,well noted.

stiles009:
I admire you tenancity broda, wish all disabled can be optimistic as you.. my advice for you is to get a babe that's not too dependent, and pursue ur dreams.

Thanks buddy

Olayinka8793:
like I said earlier, I have accepted it as my fate but thanks all the same

This is your fate. 3 John 2 Beloved, I wish above all things that
thou mayest prosper and be in health,
even as thy soul prospereth.

iykekelvins:
Bro, mehn I applaud your use of English man. Very fluent.

I have no advice tho, not a relationship person.

honestly, the guy is good with his English.

@op, i must commend your optimism, courage and struggles to become self dependant.
Unlike others facing similar situation but have given up and turned beggars on the streets.

God bless

ednut1:
pastor wey no fit save hin marriage na him go save op, naso. mr Op get a gal if u want to and stop ur assumptions, assertions and permutations

that pastor really effd up. But i don't blame him like those montol following him.

When his members began to show concern and started trying to interrogate him concerning his divorce issue, the yahoo plus of a pastor simply told them not to question the man of god.

And just like the zombies they are, they swallowed the response he gave them hook, line and sinker

Wow!

OK, so having gone through your post I feel obliged to make some comments.

Kudos to you for rising above your situation and taking hold of your destiny, very commendable.

As regards sign language, I think you have it wrong. Learning it doesn't mean you can't live like a normal person, a lot of people that can talk and speak well still know sign language. I think sign language is there as an advantage to compensate for your lack of hearing. In the long run, it will be of immense help to you.

As for getting a girlfriend, I'll tell u what I always tell people, you shouldn't force it. It will happen when it happens. Live your life, be happy, be confident, keep good company(both male and female), discard the prostitute thoughts, if you get a friend willing to gbensh, den by all means gbensh!

I don't know what you've gone through and I don't claim to be a love expert, this is just my humble thoughts on your post.

lookatew:
Wow!

OK, so having gone through your post I feel obliged to make some comments.

Kudos to you for rising above your situation and taking hold of your destiny, very commendable.

As regards sign language, I think you have it wrong. Learning it doesn't mean you can't live like a normal person, a lot of people that can talk and speak well still know sign language. I think sign language is there as an advantage to compensate for your lack of hearing. In the long run, it will be of immense help to you.

As for getting a girlfriend, I'll tell u what I always tell people, you shouldn't force it. It will happen when it happens. Live your life, be happy, be confident, keep good company(both male and female), discard the prostitute thoughts, if you get a friend willing to gbensh, den by all means gbensh!

I don't know what you've gone through and I don't claim to be a love expert, this is just my humble thoughts on your post.

Thanks for your input sir, well noted.

A king needs a kingdom and not a queen....

Stay calm, have an open mind and keep meeting d chicks, u never can tell.

Get a deaf gal. Find her. If you try having a relationship with a gal with normal hearing abilities
You will be dissappointed
They will cheat on you... Find someone with d same problem like you...go to the school of the deaf and dumb...you will.make it

babyfaceafrica:
Get a deaf gal. Find her. If you try having a relationship with a gal with normal hearing abilities
You will be dissappointed
They will cheat on you... Find someone with d same problem like you...go to the school of the deaf and dumb...you will.make it

Unfortunately I don't see myself as a deaf person which is why l never want anything to do that associates me with them, in fact I take offense at ignorant people who dares to try and communicate with me using sign language.

Olayinka8793:
Unfortunately I don't see myself as a deaf person which is why l never want anything to do that associates me with them, in fact I take offense at ignorant people who dares to try and communicate with me using sign language.

okay. A normal gal will take advantage of your predicament and dissapoint you ...she will gossip cheat and malign you...even those of us with normal hearing conditions have been dealt with..... The choice is your own... Goodluck

babyfaceafrica:
Get a deaf gal. Find her. If you try having a relationship with a gal with normal hearing abilities
You will be dissappointed
They will cheat on you... Find someone with d same problem like you...go to the school of the deaf and dumb...you will.make it

You spoke the plain fact!

Olayinka8793:
Good day my people, l need your mature advice on an issue please.
I am a 24 years old deaf guy(l have total hearing loss on both ears), self employed and financially stable, I work as a male hairstylist in in a shop of my own, I used to find it very difficult to get on well with people of the opposite sex mainly because of my hearing loss which diminish my confidence a lot as it undermine my conversation with normal people (l communicate primarily by lip reading and I don't understand sign language ), I was never born deaf but by an unfortunate mistake when I was young so I was never brought up with sign language. The hearing loss affected my education severely which was why l gave up pursuing higher education as my only option was a university for the deaf and l don'tt understand sign language (and l was never willing to learn sign language cos I choose to live like a normal person ).
Long story short, I dropped out of SS2 after falling the promotion examination to SS3 (first time I have ever failed an academic examination ) this is because SS2 appears to be the limit my deafness can endure in a school for normal hearing people (l became deaf while in basic 6), l decide to learn a trade so as to be useful to myself. Fast forward am now a boss with my own apprentice and my business is doing pretty well.
I no longer fear to approach a girl due to my new found confidence of been a boss and financially comfortable, although there are still some of them who still play hard to get(l get the feeling they end up rejecting cos I rarely ask them to be friends with me more than three times, l flip them the fvck off by stopping asking them out, the life of a confident boss..... Lol ).
The thing is that l rarely ever want to get serious with any girl for now even after they accept to be friends with me because I have a goal of at least laying a foundation for my future home and been super comfortable before l get serious with any girl(virtually all my senior brothers have built houses and I want to follow in their footsteps ).
Unfortunately, this dream of mine is nowhere near been fulfilled until maybe in three years time(l have a plan for it and am pursuing it vigorously ), I get the feeling that having a girlfriend now may derail me from the plan as l feel a sweet relationship requires resources(money, time and attention ) to flourish and I feel l had better deploy those resources to achieving my dream first.
I had be happy to have a girlfriend who isn't so demanding and who supports my dreams and is prepared to stay with me for a long time but unfortunately such girls are very rare, so am surrounded by the typical naija girls lol.
And been single has its downsides which includes the feeling of loneliness and want to feel loved, this also means that I am still a virgin at 24 years(l have been contemplating breaking it with prostitutes but they sort of disgust me ).
The dream of building a home is taking a long time to release which is normal, and I am also losing patience and the situation is not helped by the fact that the few friends l have all got girlfriends and even my 21 years old younger brother with all the sweet sex that comes with it.
Am a bit confused.
Matured advice please.
N.B: please ignore my deafness(l have accept it as my fate so no need to suggest trying hearing aids as l already did at different hospitals ). Thanks.

Have you tried getting a hearing aid?

It works...