Caveat: I created this moniker strictly for this thread. Am known on some other threads and I would like to remain as anonymous as possible.
Ok so my husband and I have been married for about 3years now, and I would say so far so good except for some one or two hiccups that is expected in any marriage.

We have a pretty great sexx life, and it all seemed good till I discovered his addiction to pornography and masturbation.
From the little research that have made, it looks like a common phenomena common to the male gender, but if it was just the normal once in a week or two kinda masturbation, I would have looked the other way, but thats not the case here...my husband masturbates every freaking day, sometimes twice or thrice in a day.... I know because I pretend to be asleep and he does it right beside me, sometimes he wakes up very early, goes to the sitting room, and does his thing.

Am worried because this addiction has really eaten deep into him, and his spiritual life would definitely be affected.
Am worried because I no longer feel the intimacy that we use to share.
Am worried because its beginning to affect our sex life because sometimes he doesnt have the drive to have sexx anymore after indulging in the act.
And am worried because I feel he might no longer be getting his sexual satisfaction from me.

Am at a loss of what to do or not do, its beginning to affect me also because sometimes I just get cold and withdrawn when I think about it .

For those that might want to come from the angle of me being stiff in bed and all; no am not, and I would rate my sexual prowess as 8. 5 on a scale of 10.... And no am not ugly, fat, or dirty...

Pls I want reasonable and matured responses. No form of foolery or child's play would be entertained here.

Have a heart to heart discussion with your husband on this subject matter......

signature2012:
Have a heart to heart discussion with your husband on this subject matter......

Heart to heart ko, brain to brain ni

Woh aunty, you better start praying for your husband

Hmm this matter get as e be o. Anyway and talk to him, asin you can start by bringing the issue of porn and masturbation you see on nairaland and people view, that is if he is the chatting type. Also you can fill in the gap, anytime you see him trying to watch porn, initiate sex immediately, I believe if you satisfies him I think he will loose the urge to continue, but if continues then he needs help.

dude messing with potential erectile dysfunction. seek professional help, I don't kno why ya'll bliv nairaland hs a solution to ur problems. oga ooooooo.

anyways, proper cancelling and prayers should do the job

Ma'am you didn't say anything about talking to him about it.
Please communicate with him,tell him how you feel about it.
And please pray for him too

anonymoususer:
Caveat: I created this moniker strictly for this thread. Am known on some other threads and I would like to remain as anonymous as possible.
Ok so my husband and I have been married for about 3years now, and I would say so far so good except for some one or two hiccups that is expected in any marriage.

We have a pretty great sexx life, and it all seemed good till I discovered his addiction to pornography and masturbation.
From the little research that have made, it looks like a common phenomena common to the male gender, but if it was just the normal once in a week or two kinda masturbation, I would have looked the other way, but thats not the case here...my husband masturbates every freaking day, sometimes twice or thrice in a day.... I know because I pretend to be asleep and he does it right beside me, sometimes he wakes up very early, goes to the sitting room, and does his thing.

Am worried because this addiction has really eaten deep into him, and his spiritual life would definitely be affected.
Am worried because I no longer feel the intimacy that we use to share.
Am worried because its beginning to affect our sex life because sometimes he doesnt have the drive to have sexx anymore after indulging in the act.
And am worried because I feel he might no longer be getting his sexual satisfaction from me.

Am at a loss of what to do or not do, its beginning to affect me also because sometimes I just get cold and withdrawn when I think about it .

For those that might want to come from the angle of me being stiff in bed and all; no am not, and I would rate my sexual prowess as 8. 5 on a scale of 10.... And no am not ugly, fat, or dirty...

Pls I want reasonable and matured responses. No form of foolery or child's play would be entertained here.

pls u need to talk to him about it, and also pray to God to help him out, masturbation is a very serious issue, i started my as a joke because a friend of my told me that he does it, and b4 i knew it was masturbation more than 3 times in a day, and i did it for like 4bad yrs..

after the act one must be very tired and lazy, u will even say that u won't do it again, bt b4 u know it u are online, and once u site any erotic pics or videos the thought would come..

bt i year i prayed to God to help me out, and stop watching porn, and i can tell u that i have nt done it for more than a yr and i am nt yet married neither am i keeping a girl friend..

conclusion: he needs ur prayers andlove more at this time, only talking to him can nt solve the issue, rather it will only make him 2 be to careful..

Pornography is one of the strongest addiction to eradicate. Self will can't stop it. He needs to see a therapist. Or better still, He should go and meet his pastor to offer deliverance for Him.

You might think your sex life is great until you hear from him deep down, whenever you him about to start, sort him out yourself, he's yours just as u belong to him, he would definitely appreciate it, try making the move first, make him dry.



If the above doesn't work, counselling on the dangers telling him the dangers and the risk he puts the family in and put him in prayer.

[color=#770077][/color]First make him to be aware u knew what he z up to, stop pretending u dnt nd be dieing in side. Communicate wit him on hw u feel nd try help him out of his addictions, he might be trying to stop but can't. If he refuses just join him whenever u caught him doing it am sure he wouldn't want to c his wife masturbate too.

Donald3d:
Ma'am you didn't say anything about talking to him about it.
Please communicate with him,tell him how you feel about it.
And please pray for him too

Yes I know I should communicate with him... but the issue is how to go about it, knowing that it's a sensitive issue

jeff1607:
You might think your sex life is great until you hear from him deep down, whenever you him about to start, sort him out yourself, he's yours just as u belong to him, he would definitely appreciate it, try making the move first, make him dry.



If the above doesn't work, counselling on the dangers telling him the dangers and the risk he puts the family in and put him in prayer.

Thank you very much...Have been praying for him since I discovered.
I would try to do all of the above...

Thank you all for the responses..

Just try all of the above,make first move sometimes as men really appreciate it and PRAY.

Mrnakeina:


Heart to heart ko, brain to brain ni

Woh aunty, you better start praying for your husband

..Prayer for what exactly?!..the guy u quoted was on point..op,talk to ur hubby..i hope things get better