Tallesty1:
Are you guys intentionally ignoring the part where he said that even though she never informed him before building the house, she asked for 800k for roofing which he obliged but when he asked her for just 20k she refused? Am I the only one that saw that part?

I was weak when I saw that part SMH

paix:
Women, you can never know them. There was a man who rented a house close to 10 years not knowing that the house actually belonged to the wife.

jesus...!!!!

Moses247:

Pls talk more let's learn from ur experience jare, imagine her Building a house without her husband knowing? before u know it Na to over throw u remain Lol.

Hmmm and imagine him getting married to another woman without his wife knowledge, I love that woman a very smart chap, Pls carry your infertile sperm with ur useless broke family comot here make we see road.

Your comment lacks wisdom.
Are you saying your wife is at liberty to acquire property without the courtesy of informing you, her husband? And to think she even denied that for seven months is most condemnable.
I gauze you are not married and so lacks experience and the wisdom that coe with it.

keepingmum:
I dont understand what your anger is. She should have told you about the property shes building....YES
But have you built or acquired assets in your name alone during thr course of the marriage? Are ALL assets in the marriage acquired in both your names?
What is wrong in a woman owning a property to her name solely?
How has your relationship been during the course of your marriage?
Have you cheated ot given her course to doubt your loyalty and fidelity in the marriage?
Finally you talk about not beating or cursing her in the marriage.....are you expecting to be rewarded or given a medal?? Or you think its thr norm to be abusive to women?
You talk about maintaining 2 homes in lag and abuja so what about that? If you are tired relocate back to Lag or move your wife to Abj to join you.
There are people that maintain 4 homes ...one with the kids in uni...the other wifey stays there for work...3rd they stay there for their own work and then 4th extended family stays so what exactly are you doing that no other person has done?

Finally keep your family in check cos its clear from your write up your family has played a role in making your wife feel unsecured in her marriage

Finally, a lady with a good head on her shoulders. Not those rushing to assume things and taking sides out of sentiments without thinking things properly.

frozen70:

You dont know the poster from Adams, you were attacking him instead of the advice he needed.
He wasn't bracing that he maintains two homes he is just telling us the sacrifice he made for their comfort, though he wouldn't have said he has never beaten the wife that's not what a man should be proud of.
Yes its wrong for a wife to set up a building with out the knowledge of the husbands, but like the husband said that probably she is sensing danger because she is yet to give birth. I think the man should notify the wife family his intention to get separated or divorce their daughter ,it might not be easy but it's one of the way out.

Adamrealman78:
Latest update- she just called and started Trying to explain her way out of her rash behavior,which she is habitual of doing for the past 6yrs.she would want to rationalize a mistake claiming the Bible said women are the weaker vessel. Men have really been undermined ,well new year new system. Dem go hear am.I rest my case.God bless all the people in the house. Shalom

Oga abeg make up with your family, family is everything man.

Greatzeus:
Why does it seem like the fact that she is building a house is what is paining you badly

Don't mind the wicked bitter,infetile,enemy of progress man .metwwww, she know say u marry another woman that's why she has her own plan B too, you think say na only u wise abi?

Adamrealman78:
she told me categorically that she can't relocate to Abuja cos of her shop.I promised to get another one in Abuja and restock. She said that she has established herself in ogudu GRA,claiming that sales would never be the same.

Sorry to say but that is the talk of an unintelligent selfish woman. Her shop obviously means more to her than the marriage. Truly,you were never meant to marry her.

FloraEC:


To be honest, I don't blame your wife. I wonder how many times you've called her barren maybe telling her, her tubes are blocked and she can't release an egg that's why she's not ovulating e.t.c

The magic you supposed to do is for her to undergo an operation to remove the uterine fibroid, tubal flushing or taking drugs for it and also taking drugs that aids ovulation. Did you do that?

And now you're trying to be all emotional, all of a sudden you remembered your parents warned you cos she borrowed herself sense to build a house since you and your family members obviously don't love her or accept her. Now you trying to blame her, calling her sorts of names so you'll garner sympathy.
I wish you the best with the girl you've already slept with and wants to marry, may she karashika your life very well.


Shalom

Amen & amen

Adamrealman78:
I see responses saying I feel hurt for not telling me about her project! Wrong, I am happy about her success, but when a woman you support to be a success uses your kindness to elevate herself and wants to run you into penury.be wise,at a time she borrowed 400k for a project and I ended paying the loan,I sold my old car,borrowed another 300k to meet her needs.As a rule to make her feel loved, I never for once in 6yrs requested what I wanted.I made sure my provision for her needs are what she wanted.just imagine, I lost my old job in 2014.even without a job,I sold my assets to take care of the home. After making sure I was broke, she would leave me in the house with N200 to eat till she came back from the shop. When God now gave me a federal appointment in Abuja, she told me to resign and come back to Lagos. This is just the tip of the iceberg, if I talk more.I would break the Internet.

pls avoid that woman at all costs. I know their type. very selfish, evil and diabolic. Maybe her jazz just recently expired. Flee at all costs before she go and renew the jazz subscription.

adamrealman2016:
instead of learning from my experience people are there abusing each other.many Nigerians would never reach their full mental potential with this myopic mindset

You talk too much oga! Your wife is really trying to cope with you
At topic, she has owned up, what else do you want from her?

ETHIX:



I just pray your wife will do that to you. U will come back to read what u wrote to console urself

You should have known the person you quoted is a lady na. You can always tell when it's a lady talking as far as issues like this,is concerned.

Thegeneralqueen:
Not nice like seriously what the hell was she thinking if she'll build a house let it be in you guys name...... but I still don't know why some ladies behave like this..... a man is showing you love and your mumu level is on a long thing..... the only problem I have with men is if they don't love their wives..... but you're showing her love and care despite all this year's of barrenness I just don't want to go hard on her cause she's your wife.......please if you're married or in a relationship there are something's you shouldn't do when angry biko..... I wish

Another lady with brain.

keepingmum:
I dont understand what your anger is. She should have told you about the property shes building....YES
But have you built or acquired assets in your name alone during thr course of the marriage? Are ALL assets in the marriage acquired in both your names?
What is wrong in a woman owning a property to her name solely?
How has your relationship been during the course of your marriage?
Have you cheated ot given her course to doubt your loyalty and fidelity in the marriage?
Finally you talk about not beating or cursing her in the marriage.....are you expecting to be rewarded or given a medal?? Or you think its thr norm to be abusive to women?
You talk about maintaining 2 homes in lag and abuja so what about that? If you are tired relocate back to Lag or move your wife to Abj to join you.
There are people that maintain 4 homes ...one with the kids in uni...the other wifey stays there for work...3rd they stay there for their own work and then 4th extended family stays so what exactly are you doing that no other person has done?

Finally keep your family in check cos its clear from your write up your family has played a role in making your wife feel unsecured in her marriage

In my village. They say "weyrey dun wo, kose bi lomo"
It is only right for U to speak this way cos U are not in his shoes. It is very normal for U to condemn him because U are in his situation. If only U know what it feels to give someone your everything, fight the world just to be with her. Give what U don't even have and the person did something as huge as building a house without ur knowledge. Its what they call DISLOYALTY. & that feeling that comes with it terrible. It makes one asks rhetorical questions that sometimes lead to suicide or depression.
There is absolutely nothing wrong having her own goals but communication is Key

Adamrealman78:
After marrying a girl against my parents wishes, for 6yrs with no child. I have never, cursed, abused or beaten her. I pay for two houses, one in Abuja and Lagos cos I work in Abuja. I provide for the home and pay her allowance and pay all utilities. She has a shop in Lagos.

I found out that she is building a house without informing me. I knew she did this cos she thought my family would chase her for her childlessness. I confronted her and she denied it for 7months. Only to own up after her pastor scolded her.

She wanted me to give her 800k to roof the house which I obliged. I now tested her by telling her to lend me 20k to sort out a small issue, only for her to tell me she can't afford to, in spite of a balance of over 200k in her account.

I quietly left the house for my base in Abuja, she didn't even escort me out of the bedroom. My relationship with her is over.

MEN, any woman you sacrifice for and she can't do the same for you is not worth it.

If every man waits for a woman that will sacrifice for him, sorry to say, he will wait forever. But your wife's action is cruel

cooker:
Are you a cheater?

No he's a Leopard

Some of you will see a topic with 5 pages and will not check for ops update. You'll just be judging.

Why are some of you judging the woman base on what the op said. I make judgement after hearig from the two parties. And i want to just say that the op doesn't love his wife because a real man will not stay and allow people to rubbish his wife and clearly he has been cheating on her from what he said. Op she knows about your affair and she knows that her time is up that is why she is building the house. Was she that bad because you didn't say anythin nice about her. God will be her comforter when the divorce takes place and i also hope you find happiness too.

Tallesty1:
Are you guys intentionally ignoring the part where he said that even though she never informed him before building the house, she asked for 800k for roofing which he obliged but when he asked her for just 20k she refused? Am I the only one that saw that part?

You need not be surprised na. You should be used to how ladies think and approach issues even when the facts are starring them in their faces. They would always approach it with sentiments.

Oyindidi:
You talk too much oga! Your wife is really trying to cope with you
At topic, she has owned up, what else do you want from her?

OP is a testament to the saying that age is not a reflection of maturity.

My guy just came here to open his yansh, he is not asking anyone for advise because he has done what he has in mind already, this is supposed to be a warning.

Both he and the wife are immature. Maybe the woman has been suspecting his side relationship for a while and everything she did is to ensure she doesn't get kicked out with nothing, she also feels slighted hence her refusal to reason with him at various times.

Anyway, let him move on, and wish him luck with the new bae, may thunder not strike twice. See how happy Daddy Freeze is since he moved on, even immature people deserve love and happiness

Adamrealman78:
After marrying a girl against my parents wishes, for 6yrs with no child. I have never, cursed, abused or beaten her. I pay for two houses, one in Abuja and Lagos cos I work in Abuja. I provide for the home and pay her allowance and pay all utilities. She has a shop in Lagos.

I found out that she is building a house without informing me. I knew she did this cos she thought my family would chase her for her childlessness. I confronted her and she denied it for 7months. Only to own up after her pastor scolded her.

She wanted me to give her 800k to roof the house which I obliged. I now tested her by telling her to lend me 20k to sort out a small issue, only for her to tell me she can't afford to, in spite of a balance of over 200k in her account.

I quietly left the house for my base in Abuja, she didn't even escort me out of the bedroom. My relationship with her is over.

MEN, any woman you sacrifice for and she can't do the same for you is not worth it.

@bolded, i don't understand that part. What exactly did she tell u she wanted to use the money for?

I am not an advocate of divorce Sir. And will never tell you to do so. But at times I wonder when some women will be truthful to themselves and learn to be good wives. All these unnecessary talks would have been avoided if she was a loyal to her husband. I can't imagine doing all that and my conscience will let me be. It won't even work sef
Sir even if you want a divorce which is so clear you do, let her family know.

safarigirl:
OP is a testament to the saying that age is not a reflection of maturity.

My guy just came here to open his yansh, he is not asking anyone for advise because he has done what he has in mind already, this is supposed to be a warning.

Both he and the wife are immature. Maybe the woman has been suspecting his side relationship for a while and everything she did is to ensure she doesn't get kicked out with nothing, she also feels slighted hence her refusal to reason with him at various times.

Anyway, let him move on, and wish him luck with the new bae, may thunder not strike twice. See how happy Daddy Freeze is since he moved on, even immature people deserve love and happiness

gosh i love what you said

Melakuchikala:
I am not an advocate of divorce Sir. And will never tell you to do so. But at times I wonder when some women will be truthful to themselves and learn to be good wives. All these unnecessary talks would have been avoided if she was a loyal to her husband. I can't imagine doing all that and my conscience will let me be. It won't even work sef
Sir even if you want a divorce which is so clear you do, let her family know.

loyalty begets loyalty. This man has been cheating on his wife, would you be loyal to a man you know is cheating on you?

madridguy:
Divorce is not the answer sir.

If divorce is not the answer...could you please tell us the answer?

Adamrealman78:
She can't change. I saw this attitude long ago,but thought pure love and affection could reform her.if I continue in the relationship, she would ruin me into debt.

Ma gor. Best solution before is too late.

This one thinks that marriage is just boyfriend girlfriend relationship where you just break up! I feel like laughing!

Only those that have been married for 10 years and above should give advice otherwise lets just learn lessons.

Hello Mr man..... If they ask for mumu mumu,you should represent Africa.

What name does your wife bears?
If she tells you how many will you have given her..... Rejoice I say rejoice..... Support her....... Don't be naughty... If you needs more counseling call me 08189741753.

Adamrealman78:
sorry for yourself, this happened last week Monday, on Tuesday I bleeped my new wife.she is on her way to Abuja to replace the other one.life goes on always have plan b,c,d-z

That lady must have suffered in ur hands, what u complained abt happened on Monday, then on Tuesday u bleeped ur new wife.....how did u do that? I mean such a quick remarriage or na Abuja Marriage? When did u go for d new wife intro and her white wedding and or court wedding? You have been sleeping out and abandoning her and proberbly treat her badly, she foresaw what await her and decided to make plans for herself. Did u actually married her or u just did d way u did d second woman? Get focuss and have a change or heart.

Adamrealman78:
After marrying a girl against my parents wishes, for 6yrs with no child. I have never, cursed, abused or beaten her. I pay for two houses, one in Abuja and Lagos cos I work in Abuja. I provide for the home and pay her allowance and pay all utilities. She has a shop in Lagos.

I found out that she is building a house without informing me. I knew she did this cos she thought my family would chase her for her childlessness. I confronted her and she denied it for 7months. Only to own up after her pastor scolded her.

She wanted me to give her 800k to roof the house which I obliged. I now tested her by telling her to lend me 20k to sort out a small issue, only for her to tell me she can't afford to, in spite of a balance of over 200k in her account.

I quietly left the house for my base in Abuja, she didn't even escort me out of the bedroom. My relationship with her is over.

MEN, any woman you sacrifice for and she can't do the same for you is not worth it.

You never had a wife. A wife is a help mate according to the Holy Book. If your wife cannot be a helper but a leech dump her completely! She is a very wicked woman.