Apina:

He was wrong for not informing you about the child but the deed has been done and he said the Lady is married. The intention of the individual who called to tell you is questionable. It isn't as though he was married and took you for a ride, sit down With him and make further enquiries about whatever doubts you might be harbouring, asking you to back out of the said union would be myopic, what if you fall in love with a widower who has kids and you get married, would you reject his child for whatever reason(just saying). I would have asked you to go into panic mode if the mother if the child was still available but she isn't and thus you should also move on with your fiancee.

she asked for a matured mind and she got a tortoise. Wise words bro...U said my mind..

Emmybreezy:
I look at you ladies sometimes and laugh if you have ever think that 70% of Nigerians are ladies...and most are single...if a man keep such a secret is for the betterment of the relationship as far he does love you..fine you might be upset for not letting you about it.. but my dear you have nothing to lose...be wise and carry on with the marriage and make your own baby with him...don't hunt him by his past.

This is not right, it's like a foundation built on shaky ground, it may collapse anytime.
Why not tell the truth? If the lady loves you, she will accept you for who you are.
Afterall, it's not that she doesnt have her own past too. Yes, in most cases.

why are you bothered? he's a father not like "punna will slack or have a flacid stomach or even a fallen olympus". everything with him is top shape.

semyman:
relationship coach in theory, practice is all a different kettle of fish

Na u sabi o. I got no time to barter words with you.

golor:





The place you took the picture looks like CBN hall of uniuyo

That's Amina hall of Ahmadu Bello University, Zaria. Lol

TiffanyJ:
That's the female hostel of ABU Zaria, sir.

yes o. Amina hall

If you know you can accept your future step child as your own fully cos I don't want a situation of another wicked step mother then go ahead with the marriage plans but if no you know what to do

Shugarlord213:
Even if he told you sef the question remains...


What have you contributed asides your punana

Bros you wicked o

Shugarlord213:
Even if he told you sef the question remains...


What have you contributed asides your punana

Bros you wicked o

It depends if u both were dating when it happened. Otherwise go ahead and marry him. I lost my one true love cos similar story. Kinda still regrets it. #okbye

steph2sweet:
Pls matured minds in the house, i need an advice. I just got the shock of my life today. I got to know that the man I am planning to spend the rest of my life with has a child out of wedlock. I heard this from someone close to his family and I confronted him about it. He said he is afraid to loose me, that was why he didn't tell me about it. That he doesn't have anything to do with the lady that gave birth to the child for him, and that the lady is already married. I am just short of words.

Did you ask him this when you started dating and he denied it, or you just found out confronted him and he agreed.
if that latter is the case he is sincere but if the former then run for cover.
You don't give answer to questions you are not asked.
What you do know is to look how sincere he has been to you all this while and the kind of person he is, if he has been good, reasonable and what you want to ahead and build.
Don't lose the opportunity because it might never come.

Just what happened to me. I discovered the girl I was planning Marriage with has a daughter and keep it from me. It was so painful but to be honest I called the marriage off. But maybe I would have handle the situation more maturely if it was now, however I would advise you find out more things about the guy then make your own decision and remember No one is perfect.

So, kileti ko gbo ri tabi ki loju ko ri ri? That he has a child outside se wa di Ogun? Are you a virgin? Have you also confess all those chop and clean mouth you were involved in? Did he knows how many people have debe? Stop all this radarada and move on with your life.

your relationship lacks trust and honesty. if he can hide his child ,then some many things he isn't telling you.

obviously he is not playing his fatherly roles to his child,he can never make or be a good father.

steph2sweet:
Pls matured minds in the house, i need an advice. I just got the shock of my life today. I got to know that the man I am planning to spend the rest of my life with has a child out of wedlock. I heard this from someone close to his family and I confronted him about it. He said he is afraid to loose me, that was why he didn't tell me about it. That he doesn't have anything to do with the lady that gave birth to the child for him, and that the lady is already married. I am just short of words.

do not marry him, unless the lady is dead....advice your guy to marry him

TiffanyJ u r 1000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000% prefect right is a choose not an opportunity

hmmm

xendra:
hmmm! my story want just be like your own .......Men!

Stop being judgmental by ignoring the fact of the onces that great in such cover ups. Imagine a woman training her child to see her as an Aunty for the rest of his or her life. N I wonder Y men that actually meets up to 20% of such women in his lifetime don't come online to yell WOMEN!!!!!!!!!!

Abeg sister,think before u enter it I have an experienced similar to this even he called himself divorce he told me one child where as it's two kids even with their mother he said keep communicating and he said she has married to be frankly i won't even advice u to enter any marriage with him because alots of experienced from even elder sisters outside on what they faced after their marriage to even telling his new wife that he still love his babymama that he wish she come back to his life...dig very well about his life even deeper to his past and decide either u will stay or leave it's depend on ur outcome but shaa dig very well..men are wicked with their sweet mouth...

forgive him and life goes on

My dear, i will advice you not to only run for your life but you also run to God. Probably he must have engaged in the act with you, more reason you need God to make you sexually pure. Dont feel dejected your husband will surely come.

Mcy56:

This is not right, it's like a foundation built on shaky ground, it may collapse anytime.
Why not tell the truth? If the lady loves you, she will accept you for who you are.
Afterall, it's not that she doesnt have her own past too. Yes, in most cases.

it might not be easy as it seems...telling someone a deep secret sometimes depends on the person you telling it to...if your partner is such an aggressive type the best way is to keep it from him/her for a while...nothing under the sun that have a secret place one day it will be told at the appropriate time to tell.

He should have told you but he didnt.
Its left for you to decide if you want to go on or not because it is you who will be in the marriage not me.

But if I were in your shoe, I will go on with the marriage. Having child out of wedlock is not new these days.

TroubleMaker47:

If it was the woman, would you say the same?

when did a man equate to a woman.....diff rules applies.a man marries a lady n not otherwise

adekS1:
when did a man equate to a woman.....diff rules applies.a man marries a lady n not otherwise

Lol you are funny. Who says yes to the marriage proposal? The man?

Suspend any post courtship plans until everything is sorted out. You have just started the journey of knowing him.

Emmybreezy:
it might not be easy as it seems...telling someone a deep secret sometimes depends on the person you telling it to...if your partner is such an aggressive type the best way is to keep it from him/her for a while...nothing under the sun that have a secret place one day it will be told at the appropriate time to tell.

....but what if the truth eventually comes out and the man lost his respect and trust with the woman?
Will we say the woman is not justified therewith?
Can a woman keep this type of secret away from a man and not have its bad side when eventually known?

If you truly love him, stay with him !

Its difficulty to get a responsible man to marry these days.
The rate of single ladies outside is really alarming !

TiffanyJ:

That's Amina hall of Ahmadu Bello University, Zaria. Lol

great great ABUSITE. MY fmr friend was at dat hostel very plenty yrs back .me was livin at Riminstwa Estate then...school days ..

steph2sweet:
Pls matured minds in the house, i need an advice. I just got the shock of my life today. I got to know that the man I am planning to spend the rest of my life with has a child out of wedlock. I heard this from someone close to his family and I confronted him about it. He said he is afraid to loose me, that was why he didn't tell me about it. That he doesn't have anything to do with the lady that gave birth to the child for him, and that the lady is already married. I am just short of words.

I have two daughters out of wedlock too, i have nothing to do with thier mum but i made it known to my fiancee from the begining.. i am happy she accepted even after knowing.

tho i was so scared, because i love her so much, but i believe if it can work, it will work..

Please just forgive him, but be sure he has nothing to do with his ex because we men r funny, we allow our d**k do the thinking once it comes to ex issues

Indomie children ,make ur mind to marry the the man or the woman u love, and leave the rest, life is short.
u are not ur Creator

Indomie children ,make up ur mind to marry the the man or the woman u love, and leave the rest, life is short.
u are not ur Creator

xendra:
hmmm! my story want just be like your own .......Men!

Sorry for you, Is that why you put up that signature?