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How Beans Saved Us From Armed Robbers - Jokes Etc - Nairaland

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Former Commissioner For Education In Katsina State, Killed By Armed Robbers / How His Life Was Saved (pix) / See Wat Happens Wen A Policeman Breaks Into An Apatment Filled Wit Armed Robbers (2) (3) (4)

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How Beans Saved Us From Armed Robbers by BlinksBlinkd: 10:55am On May 06
HOW BEANS SAVED US FROM ARMED ROBBERS PART 1
.

Mama i no wan eat beans o, i shouted
loud and clear for every tom, diick and
harry to hear.
If you are not eating beans then you are
going to bed hungry, papa replied in a
voice that would make Rick Ross
jealous.
I managed to eat the beans because i
find it difficult to control my bowels after
eating it but i have no choice.
We all ate beans that night, papa, mama,
i and my siblings and some extended
cousins that came to spend the holidays
with us. Hours later, we were watching
Jennifer’s diary on Africa magic when
the generator went off.
Wasiu!! Papa shouted. Go and check the
gen, e be like say fuel don finish and
make sure you pour the remaining fuel
into it and on it back, he ordered.
I quickly went outside to do his biddings
cos i was enjoying the movie too when
something that sounded like the banger
we throw on every new year’s eve landed
on my face.
Gboaa!!!
Haa jesu!! I staggered for balance, i saw
heaven opened with God and Jesus
smiling at me telling me to keep up the
good work. I was brought out of my
reveries with another slap that will make
the combination of both Sango/
Amadioha’s thunder look like the
clapping of a little baby.
Oya lead the way, the one that looked
like their leader commanded. I led them
into our store cos at this stage i was
already seeing triple blame it on the slap.
I finally found my way into our sitting
room with a gun pointed to my head.
All of una lie down!! Their leader
commanded. Wey your father? He asked
me. I pointed at my younger bro
wondering when he started going bald. I
no be papa o, na papa be this, he
shouted with all his might and pointed at
papa.
Papa gave out the first fart which
sounded like a volcano.
Who is that? The leader asked.
Everywhere was silent.
I said who is that? He had barely
completed his sentence when mama
replied with another epic fart. Meanwhile,
the stinking odour of papa’s fart that
smelled like a dead rat is still thick in the
air. Now with mama own which smelled
like a rotten egg joining it, you can
imagine our dilemma.
Hun haa!!! My first cousin who is a
notorious farter jumped up blowing air
with his hands to his nose. Papa and
mama wasiu this is too bad o, una wan
kill person? he complained bitterly. I
think his face is very near to where
mama buttocks is.
Will you shut up, he was cut short by the
second thief. Where is your money and
gold? He faced papa.
I no get money o, papa never finished
his statement when a slap that sounded
like the Catholic bell landed on his face.
Papa replied with a fart that lasted for
30seconds, i was gasping for breath at
this stage.

.
Click on the link below to continue reading

www.naijanoisemakers.com.ng/2018/04/21/beans-saved-us-armed-robbers-part-1/

2 Likes

Re: How Beans Saved Us From Armed Robbers by demoBaba: 7:38pm On May 06
If you like complete it here, nah you sabi

1 Like

Re: How Beans Saved Us From Armed Robbers by BlinksBlinkd: 3:26pm On May 18
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Re: How Beans Saved Us From Armed Robbers by BlinksBlinkd: 6:10pm On May 28
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Re: How Beans Saved Us From Armed Robbers by BlinksBlinkd: 5:28am On Jun 15
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Re: How Beans Saved Us From Armed Robbers by BlinksBlinkd: 7:57am On Jul 26
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Re: How Beans Saved Us From Armed Robbers by BlinksBlinkd: 2:25am On Aug 17
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Re: How Beans Saved Us From Armed Robbers by BlinksBlinkd: 2:25am On Aug 29
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Re: How Beans Saved Us From Armed Robbers by BlinksBlinkd: 7:04am On Sep 06
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Re: How Beans Saved Us From Armed Robbers by BlinksBlinkd: 4:40pm On Sep 14
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