maiyee:

women are put under undue pressure, just look at this!! later women will be told to struggle in their careers so they don't become "liabilities" now someone is saying they should forget their career goals and embrace the concept of "family"
one of the worst places to be a woman is in Nigeria. You want her to be hard working, yet not too hardworking, smart but not really smart, career oriented but not much... like where do we draw the line? na wa oo! I think every ambitious Nigerian woman, who has a purpose for her life, that doesn't conform to the "Nigerian norm" should save money and leave this country...

Take it easy, I know you are pissed up.

At the coloured: Good option, but not as easy you put it. What about those whose parents are very influential on their lives? Tell them from which tribe to marry from? When to marry? I know one like that, she contemplates going to the US for postgraduate studies, but is not sure on staying back because her dad has insisted she marries from their tribe. Or the other who is trying to commence her career but gets "do and marry" sermons left, right and center?

Not easy being a woman in Nigeria, ditto a man.

The thing is we should all learn to accept the way we were created though there are some exceptions. Like my course (Mechanical Engineering), we have a higher number of guys as compared to girls,while for a course like Sociology, it's the other way round. Though I've seen "few" girls in Engineering who are up to the physical task, but still our abilities as male and female differ most times. We should accept these simple differences and stop struggling to make ourselves ẹqual...... The ratio of male to female for some professions would never be equal. Though if a girl feels she is up to the task in a profession where men are the majority, she's free to, no one is stopping anyone..... But equality in the real sense is impossible. We are different, that's why we are called MALE and FEMALE..... that's a difference on its own.

Firgemachar:


As long as they continue to don the toga of feminism to look down on the billions ready to be or already being what God created them to be, they will continue to mean something - a nuisance.

God did not tell you anything, you're not speaking for him, prove otherwise.

maiyee:

women are put under undue pressure, just look at this!! later women will be told to struggle in their careers so they don't become "liabilities" now someone is saying they should forget their career goals and embrace the concept of "family"
one of the worst places to be a woman is in Nigeria. You want her to be hard working, yet not too hardworking, smart but not really smart, career oriented but not much... like where do we draw the line? na wa oo! I think every ambitious Nigerian woman, who has a purpose for her life, that dosnt conform to the "Nigerian norm" should save money and leave this country...

Where you want to go, women take responsibility from the dating process. Women value and help men enough to shelter and fend for broke guys from niaja looking for visa without making noise about it thesame sense of helpmate lacking in Nigerian girls.

Millz404:
In the structure of the earth and the universe at large there is balance and sometimes balance entails that there is more of a thing and less of another. The level of oil you put in a soup is not the level of salt.

Women were never made to be equal to men. That's the balance nature has created.

Women were meant to play supportive roles not compete.

Even in the business world, venture capitalists tend to favor male startups to female startups as high as a rate of 97% to 3%

Women should stay in there lane and make the most out of it. It is not condescending but just how it is

True.

We will only ruin the world if we practice 'equality' in all areas (not just gender).

What we need is equity and balance in all areas of life.

maiyee:

women are put under undue pressure, just look at this!! later women will be told to struggle in their careers so they don't become "liabilities" now someone is saying they should forget their career goals and embrace the concept of "family"
one of the worst places to be a woman is in Nigeria. You want her to be hard working, yet not too hardworking, smart but not really smart, career oriented but not much... like where do we draw the line? na wa oo! I think every ambitious Nigerian woman, who has a purpose for her life, that dosnt conform to the "Nigerian norm" should save money and leave this country...

So you think there will be different? If you pursue feminism so much there you will still have to love-vendor a naija guy to have a man later later when the whole thing backfires. Be humble even there.

maiyee:

women are put under undue pressure, just look at this!! later women will be told to struggle in their careers so they don't become "liabilities" now someone is saying they should forget their career goals and embrace the concept of "family"
one of the worst places to be a woman is in Nigeria. You want her to be hard working, yet not too hardworking, smart but not really smart, career oriented but not much... like where do we draw the line? na wa oo! I think every ambitious Nigerian woman, who has a purpose for her life, that dosnt conform to the "Nigerian norm" should save money and leave this country...

Where ever you go better develop a sense of being a helpmate otherwise......

maiyee:

women are put under undue pressure, just look at this!! later women will be told to struggle in their careers so they don't become "liabilities" now someone is saying they should forget their career goals and embrace the concept of "family"
one of the worst places to be a woman is in Nigeria. You want her to be hard working, yet not too hardworking, smart but not really smart, career oriented but not much... like where do we draw the line? na wa oo! I think every ambitious Nigerian woman, who has a purpose for her life, that dosnt conform to the "Nigerian norm" should save money and leave this country...

Where you want to go women take responsibility from the dating process. There, women value and support men enough to shelter and fend for broke guys from niaja looking for visa without making noise about it . Exhibiting thesame sense of helpmate lacking in Nigerian girls.

okwabayi:
I didn't read the post because I know the information the man will pass is based on archaic reasoning. The only jobs which place women at a disadvantage are physically demanding jobs, the ones where human muscle is pitted against machine or meant to work in tandem with them.

Jobs today are designed with weakness in mind hence their heavy focus on mental faculties. Women, trained in the same educational institutions as their male counterparts, can work these professions easily and sometimes better than lazy co-workers in the field.

The only things he [Mr. Archaic] might use against the female gender are monthly periods and an eventual pregnancy; two things which pose no problem in developed nations. When I schooled abroad I heard females could order anti-menstrual tablets and injections over the counter. Abstinence and safe sex protocols are a good counter to getting pregnant.

The bold is the bone of contention; where the issue is.

You should understand that Men and Women are wired differently biologically. They aren't the same and won't be the same...none is superior, each one is unique.

Now if a firm that needs its workers around for 260 working days annually stipulates that no one should be absent, women will have to go out of their way (through those methods you listed) to meet this requirement...which majority of them may not be fine with. However, that majority won't like to work in a setting what won't require them for 260 days a year. In the process of incorporating that into the system, the 260 day work firm incurs more costs, loses revenue and collapses... and everyone loses out altogether; the men and the women that don't mind safe sex and birth control methods.

LaExpert:

You should understand that Men and Women are wired differently biologically. They aren't the same and won't be the same...none is superior, each one is unique.

This is solid fact.

Now if a firm that needs its workers around for 260 working days annually stipulates that no one should be absent, women will have to go out of their way (through those methods you listed) to meet this requirement

Out of the way nature intended for them. True again. To survive in this modern world everyone goes out of their natural way. Humans are meant to sleep once the sun goes down, 19:00 daily, to wake up at sunrise 06:22 daily yet a lot of people spend most of their nights stuck in traffic by 22:00 only to get home by midnight. Natural? No it isn't.

which majority of them may not be fine with.

Generalization. Some women are dedicated to their job roles the same way some men are.

However, that majority won't like to work in a setting what won't require them for 260 days a year.

Most employers let you know beforehand what your job role entails. If an applicant is not suitable for a job specified there are many others they can sign up for.

In the process of incorporating that into the system, the 260 day work firm incurs more costs, loses revenue and collapses... and everyone loses out altogether.

This also happens in men-only work environments where lazy people get employed. It can go both ways regardless of gender.

My post said "nowadays jobs are easy because they are based on intellectual not physical prowess". Majority of people are familiar with classroom situations where females became best student overall. Going by all these females shouldn't work logic does it mean the women will automatically become the worst personnel in work places?

This is what I have to say about this issue.
1. Why does it bother some men so much that women aspire to better/top/influential positions in the work place?
• Could it be because it contradicts their life long ideology that women should resign to a life of just raising kids and being a wife and they don’t have the tools to cope with this unfamiliar reality?
• Could it be that they feel insecure because some women are now doing what they were brought up to believe is their responsibility- Providing for the Family and that a lot of women are doing it better than them? Have they lost their sense of belonging?
• Could it also be that they are not happy because they can no longer hold women to financial and emotional ransom because they make money than women in the work place? Is their sense of self-worth tied to making more money than women?
• Maybe they are not happy that making a headway in the workplace is now tied to competence and no longer to gender?
2. The idea that women should not aspire to better/top/influential positions in the work place is not attainable because it contradicts one of the fundamental laws of nature-The Law of Growth. Growth is a natural phenomenon and it is very natural that men and women aspire to grow in the work place and life in general. The only time that growth stops is when there is no life. Consequently, when anyone (man or woman) stops aspiring to a better position in life something is wrong.
3. Finally, the family suffers equally when either the mother or the father is not available to spend time with the family. The role and availability of a father in a child’s upbringing is equally as important as that of a mother. Permit me to say that one of the reasons why so many adults are dysfunctional is because of the absence of their fathers in during their childhood and adolescence years. It is unfortunate that the society has brainwashed us into thinking that being absent from one’s family is an indication that one’s career is on the right path.
So instead of discouraging women from aspiring to better positions in the work place, we should collectively preach the gospel of WORK-LIFE BALANCE. Work-Life balance will result in in less dysfunctional families which will in turn result in even lesser dysfunctional adults in the society.

dchem:
Might not be politically correct but then a lot of thing written here that are true. Many women have excelled in their chosen career but most of them sacrificed a whole lot of things to achieve this feat. Its the 21st century where children are left at the mercy of house helps and we wonder why society is morally bankrupt. The choice is a very simple one; succeed in career or succeed at home.

PS: There are indeed few women who have managed to succeed at both fronts. Let every woman choose the life she wants to lead.

I quite I agree with you. It is a tough choice.my problem are those saying women can't do this and that. They actually can but the question is at what cost? I know the joy my kids feel when I stay home often with them than when I'm constantly out pursuing the so called career and money. It's about appraising your life and knowing what's most important to you. You can then make the choice.

IbnAbdullah1:


still not getting it.
Even if we were to allow women do all they want they will still end up complaining of being either over burdening them or still complain about their work schedule.
Since you so much crave for his choice then let's start with giving birth to babies and let them grow on their own to make choices.
I for one will NEVER subscribe to the rule that grants women total freedom to work as they please.
because you(women) do not even understand yourselves to start with,how much more controlling a men or being leaders.

Lol @ the emboldened

Well unfortunately for you, no woman on this earth needs your permission to do as she pleases except your unlucky wife.

Secondly, you are being ruled everyday by women directly or indirectly whether you like it or not

Ladyhippolyta88:
Well people have be changing or challenging the so called natural order of things and I don't think anyone has been hurt.
Except if you are looking at things from a religious angle as they always do.

before Nkor.

okwabayi:

Out of the way nature intended for them. True again. To survive in this modern world everyone goes out of their natural way. Humans are meant to sleep once the sun goes down, 19:00 daily, to wake up at sunrise 06:22 daily yet a lot of people spend most of their nights stuck in traffic by 22:00 only to get home by midnight. Natural? No it isn't.


Generalization. Some women are dedicated to their job roles the same way some men are.

Most employers let you know beforehand what your job role entails. If an applicant is not suitable for a job specified there are many others they can sign up for.

This also happens in men-only work environments where lazy people get employed. It can go both ways regardless of gender.

My post said "nowadays jobs are easy because they are based on intellectual not physical prowess". Majority of people are familiar with classroom situations where females became best student overall. Going by all these females shouldn't work logic does it mean the women will automatically become the worst personnel in work places?

You probably didn't get my message 100%.

I agree with the first part in bold.

Now, imagine an employer says he'll only employ people who will work all year round, a woman is still more likely going to object. Why? simply because she has to go out of her way to satisfy that condition.

I've seen people criticize firms for their workplace policies simply because it seems like it just doesn't favour the women but many women will still want to work there and want those firms to change their existing policy for them. If a woman isn't fine with a company's culture, she should totally ignore them likewise a man.

Don't get me wrong, I'm totally against unfair workplace policies either to men or to the women.

Now to the other bolded part;
I have reservations about your statement. Intellectual jobs may be even harder than physical jobs. A bad woman in a position of authority is often worse than a bad man in power (try to ask even females if they prefer male bosses or female bosses to confirm this).

What's my whole point for the epistle?
Considerations should be given to females and males to a reasonable extent to enable them perform as their counterparts subject to what the company in question can tolerate.

If a task is to be performed in maximum of one hour, a guy can do it in 40mins and a Lady can do it in 50mins, give both a chance at it and give them equal credits...however if the lady can do it in 70mins, I'm of the opinion that the company needs not employ women and it it is on the man's part too, there's no need to employ men.

LaExpert:


You probably didn't get my message 100%.

I agree with the first part in bold.

Now, imagine an employer says he'll only employ people who will work all year round, a woman is still more likely going to object. Why? simply because she has to go out of her way to satisfy that condition.

I've seen people criticize firms for their workplace policies simply because it seems like it just doesn't favour the women but many women will still want to work there and want those firms to change their existing policy for them. If a woman isn't fine with a company's culture, she should totally ignore them likewise a man.

Don't get me wrong, I'm totally against unfair workplace policies either to men or to the women.

Now to the other bolded part;
I have reservations about your statement. Intellectual jobs may be even harder than physical jobs. A bad woman in a position of authority is often worse than a bad man in power (try to ask even females if they prefer male bosses or female bosses to confirm this).

What's my whole point for the epistle?
Considerations should be given to females and males to a reasonable extent to enable them perform as their counterparts subject to what the company in question can tolerate.

If a task is to be performed in maximum of one hour, a guy can do it in 40mins and a Lady can do it in 50mins, give both a chance at it and give them equal credits...however if the lady can do it in 70mins, I'm of the opinion that the company needs not employ women and it it is on the man's part too, there's no need to employ men.

Ok. You've made your grievances known. Good.

[quote author=Thesia post=67464625][/quote]
Ok.

Surrey2Bimshire:


I still don’t think we have the right to speak for each and every family ..

A woman should be able to attain whatever path she choose for herself and not society ..

It’s none of our business how she decide to keep her family together..


I bet you didn’t know that most of the things you’re usiming of going around with were invented by women (even the internet )

Live and let live .

Sorry o, me I'm not interested in the OP. The same issue has been over flogged on this forum. What you've been saying for years, and they still did not change, more and more repetition of the same arguments will never change anything. So stop wasting your time.

As to my reason for quoting you, of course, there have been, and there are still female inventors, but the emboldened is quite curious. Did you say MOST? Can you defend that?

Last I checked, inventors have been predominantly male.

Tozara:
Sorry o, me I'm not interested in the OP. The same issue has been over flogged on this forum. What you've been saying for years, and they still did not change, more and more repetition of the same arguments will never change anything. So stop wasting your time.

As to my reason for quoting you, of course, there have been, and there are still female inventors, but the emboldened is quite curious. Did you say MOST? Can you defend that?

Last I checked, inventors have been predominantly male.

And that’s because certain inventors(Male ) did hijack quite a few things invested by women you have the internet use it wisely ..
I’m done..cheers

Surrey2Bimshire:


And that’s because certain inventors(Male ) did hijack quite a few things invested by women you have the internet use it wisely ..
I’m done..cheers

Lol! How can you make such an OUTRAGEOUS claim, only to chicken out when asked to defend it?

Tozara:
Lol! How can you make such an OUTRAGEOUS claim, only to chicken out when asked to defend it?

Nop ,different time zone ..plus , I can’t be arse with this ... I’ve moved on to something else .. done and dusted ..

Gerrard59:


Take it easy, I know you are pissed up.

At the coloured: Good option, but not as easy you put it. What about those whose parents are very influential on their lives? Tell them from which tribe to marry from? When to marry? I know one like that, she contemplates going to the US for postgraduate studies, but is not sure on staying back because her dad has insisted she marries from their tribe. Or the other who is trying to commence her career but gets "do and marry" sermons left, right and center?

Not easy being a woman in Nigeria, ditto a man.

that's the same "Nigerian norm" I'm talking about, its difficult and frustrating in Nigeria

[quote author=princfred post=67471992]Where you want to go, women take responsibility from the dating process. Women value and help men enough to shelter and fend for broke guys from niaja looking for visa without making noise about it thesame sense of helpmate lacking in Nigerian girls.[/quot that's because there is an understanding from the unset that rights in marriage would be 50/50. most women who do that responsibility thing, are tagged desperate, even the typical Nigerian male will feel his ego is being crushed and look for another girl that will make him feel masculine... that's just d way our society is

[quote author=maiyee post=67653612][/quote]

Is the African woman not the one sabotaging the 50/50 rights? Tell them to provide 50% of the bills as a matter of her responsibilities and watch her go bunkers but she wants cooking of meals to be 50/50. White women know how to keep their men feeling masculine (as they cherish and not loathe mens masculinity like Nigerian women) even while noiselessly undertaking and cherishing her own responsibilities. But with the average Nigerian lady, once she makes any meaning contribution, she automatically starts looking down om the mans place as king or his masculinity becomes an object of mockery. Is that not the reality?

Honestly, feminism is very rational but not natural.

Yes, I think every reasonable persons will like a world where anybody can chose whatever they want to be either men or women. The truth is that, our choices will always be guided by reality. Sometimes, we get stubborn and reject the natural path but often times, it comes with sacrifice. If we are ready to pay the sacrifice, we should do it without complaint.


The problem with feminism is that it seeks to create make men and women equal in all ramifications, forgetting that men also have their own natural incapabilities. Men are not naturally suited for raising babies alone., they cant breastfeed. If a woman goes all out for career and the man is left with the kids, he could try his best but will be naturally hampered.
Now remember, there is a third party; children. If you are a woman and you are ok with strangers raising your children for you, fine. Deal with it cos it's the choice yu have made.


Nevertheless, there are homes where both husband and wife are successful career people but usually when they get to a point where they have to decide who should sacrifice a bit of their career, its the woman and when the pressure for finance comes, the man steps in.


I beleive many men would be ok with women who can take care of their responsibilities too but it's the same feminist women that will call such a man lazy whereas many women live off men without compaints