₦airaland Forum

Welcome, Guest: Join Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 2,053,932 members, 4,418,309 topics. Date: Friday, 17 August 2018 at 10:18 PM

Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? - Family (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? (12721 Views)

Poll: Would You?

Yes: 22% (11 votes)
No: 77% (37 votes)
This poll has ended

Widow Loses Pregnancy After Being Battered By Man Friend (pic) / Widow's Sons Arrested For Beating Her Young Boyfriend - VI, Lagos / Given A 2nd Chance, Would You Still Marry Your Spouse? (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by madoba: 3:06pm On May 27, 2010
Am amazed at some of the immature replies on this thread, I would like to know what on earth is wrong with marrying your best friend's widow if there has been no foul play involved at any point in time.

If there was no foul play during his marriage, before his death or at the time of his death I see nothing wrong with it. We can never control what people will think or say about us, its so annoying when people don't want to be honest and do the things they like because of what people might think or say about them.

To hell with the people and their talk, so long as you have a clear & clean conscience, you are sincere with God (for he sees the sincerity of our hearts) then by all means go for it and blank out the haters & talkers.

This is not a morality issue i don't understand why some people are screaming abomination.Children please grow up
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by Rastamann: 3:22pm On May 27, 2010
Why not if not? Its only in Nigeria that we get this kind of responses that you guys are giving, in civilized world, there is nothing wrong with it.
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by hafees: 3:36pm On May 27, 2010
NIGERIA AND NIGERIANS are civilise

i think there is nothing wrong with marrying the lady if they have feelings for each other and he is willing to become a father to her children. What i thinis important however is time. They must give it like 2/3 years before getting together. People will talk yes, but are u happy?
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by Ranoscky(m): 4:13pm On May 27, 2010
@madoba - I dey feel u die. nice comment.

@hafees

2 hell wyth anybody dat say's trash if i do. so long as God knows dat my heart and concience was clear 4rm d wyfe

when the husband was styll alyve, then who give's a rat's a$$ if they talk? undecided
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by najeem7271(m): 4:20pm On May 27, 2010
Yes Because Is Not Diseases angry[color=#006600][/color]
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by AMIRACH: 4:31pm On May 27, 2010
y will you marry her is there no other person to marry
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by bisiaet: 4:33pm On May 27, 2010
This is a very upseting question. Why would someone did such? Can will call it a fun? or Help? or Madness? I dont understand the logic or the idea behind this question because this is a very upseting question.
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by yemivictor: 4:48pm On May 27, 2010
It is not an abomination, as earlier stated by somebody. In addition, if you find her suitable, and you're capable, why not if not!?!
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by yemivictor: 5:01pm On May 27, 2010
It's funny how some people are eternally bothered/concerned about what "people" will say. They forget that people will always say, no matter what. Considering the topic, if you indeed found the widow suitable, and you being capable with genuine intentions didn't make the move, people would still say! Lol,
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by nearest(m): 5:30pm On May 27, 2010
Genesis 38 vs 8-10 what's the difference between your brother or relation marrying your wife and your best friend marrying your wife?
If you marry her people will talk, if you don't marry her but help her regularly, people will also talk, even your own wife can accuse you of infidelity, but i think things like these draws lots of sentiments, and if you can handle things then do it.
I watched an interview of iretiola doyle where she said she married her best friend's husband when she died! She asked the reporter whats wrong about it, she said she saw the kids as hers and felt it wasn't wrong to marry patrick doyle.
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by GeeCee(m): 7:49pm On May 27, 2010
Why would i marry a widow?
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by r231(m): 9:43pm On May 27, 2010
hell nooooooo

don want no dead man running me down in ma sleep everynite lol

I SEE DEAD PEOPLE cheesy
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by Tcrack(m): 9:52pm On May 27, 2010
you want me to begin my life carrying another mans load abi? God forbid
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by dipo2much(m): 10:02pm On May 27, 2010
Tcrack:

you want me to begin my life carrying another mans load abi? God forbid

E.O.D
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by daroz(m): 8:04am On May 28, 2010
ordinarily, there is nothing wrong with marrying ur friend`s widow if you are doing so with a genuine purpose. But personally I can not marry any widow or any woman that have kids already, be it a friend`s or foe`s.
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by pku(f): 8:16am On May 28, 2010
What I feel is that noone ever plans to experience certain things in life; but somehow, fate or destiny forces one to be in a situation not planned for. I may not be able to do this, but I will not condemn anybody in that situation.

life itself is full of surprises!
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by next1(m): 9:10am On May 28, 2010
@madoba I agree with you to the extent that there is nothing with marrying your late friend's widow but I will have to add that it's takes a very strong character to pull this stunt through and the backlash of sentiments and emotions will not get to you. We are NIGERIANS. We think act, think and live 9ja so let's us drop this "it's only in Nigeria that people think like this , " cos that's who we are. We think about how our actions affects other people. Do not forget that there are children involved and the late guy also has family left behind. In as much as both of you can ward off the intruders what of the kids? how will they handle the whispers from their uncles and aunts ? The guy may have to contend with violent reactions from the late guy's kid.Put yourself in the place of the sibling of the late guy, how will you handle the fact that your brother is in a cold grave and HIS BEST FRIEND is getting with HIS WIFE?!!!
Now before you venture into such a journey you have to have it all figured out and it has to be for the very right reasons. I don't think I can handle it.
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by Ranoscky(m): 4:57pm On May 28, 2010
@next1, so long as my brother's best friend had no fowl play with my brother's wife when my brother was alive and

my brother's friend feels like to continue with my brother's wife, then y will i stop him from marrying her?

i will even be happy that my brother's wife is in a good and safer hands.

some widows became harlot just b'cos of their husband is nomore and abandon the children on the street, is it

better thet way? . . . i'v said it b4 and i'll say it again . . . I CAN AND I WILL!

i wanna ask u a question . . has such problem happened in nigeria or not?
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by next1(m): 8:34pm On May 28, 2010
@Ranoscky , if you have read my post properly you'll notice that I am not against this scenario completely. All I said is that you need a tough skin to pull through. To your question, yes it has happened before but it is more common to find a best friend getting down with his buddie's wife than best friends marrying their friends' widow. It's just odd
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by Ndipe(m): 9:31pm On May 28, 2010
I think it happens in America, particularly when the man knows he is dying and confides in his friend and his wife about his wishes for them to be together if they are compatible. It boils down to trust. Sometimes men, knowing their friends would want to commit to their wife to a trust worthy friend.
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by SUKKIE(m): 10:08pm On May 28, 2010
@post
Why u wanna go and do n do dat luv?
Regardless of the attraction or whatever it's utterly wrong!
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by Ndipe(m): 10:12pm On May 28, 2010
SUKKIE:

@post
Why u wanna go and do n do dat luv?
Regardless of the attraction or whatever it's utterly wrong!

How so? She is morally obligated to remarry after the death of her husband.
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by SUKKIE(m): 10:24pm On May 28, 2010
Ndipe:

How so? She is morally obligated to remarry after the death of her husband.

I cant agree less but not to you.You were once friends remember,that's covetousness by every meaning of it.
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by Ndipe(m): 12:45am On May 29, 2010
SUKKIE:

I cant agree less but not to you.You were once friends remember,that's covetousness by every meaning of it.


Covetousness after the man is dead and even the Holy Bible has given her permission to remarry, you still have a problem with that?
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by blank(f): 1:20pm On May 29, 2010
Osondi Owendi.

I cant say what i will do in such a situation.
However, if anyone does it, i will be in support.
People will always talk but i won't be one of such.
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by Iranoladun(f): 3:33pm On May 29, 2010
No!

Why would I take the left-over of my best friend?

Cann't I find my own missing rib? My own woman?

Will I suddenly fall in love with my friend's wife after his demise?

I'd do everything to support her and the kids but that's where it will end!
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by Gabangel(m): 7:07pm On May 29, 2010
IF I love her and she loves me, why wont I at least its better than having a secret affiar
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by rasputinn(m): 10:27pm On May 29, 2010
Na im be say na you kill your best friend be that
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by Ranoscky(m): 7:16am On May 30, 2010
@rasputinn

go sidan myfrien, y u go talk lyke dat? so long as god know say both of them no get any affair wen him frien

dey alyve and after d death of the friend, he became interested to d woman, y won't the marraige commence?

the only problem be say, pipu go talk but dat 1 concern dem, if dem talk finish dem go shut-up. I GO DO AM!
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by GlobalD2: 3:36am On Aug 08, 2010

There is nothing wrong marrying your best friend's widow for as long as you are not guilty or in some ways responsible for his death. Your intention to marry her must be on the basis of mutual love, understanding & commitment but not out of pity.
It will be wise, if he marry her out of pity. Talking of mutual love, it simply means they're leaving the memory of the late husband behind which is not supposed to be for the sake of the kids.


next1:

@madoba I agree with you to the extent that there is nothing with marrying your late friend's widow but I will have to add that it's takes a very strong character to pull this stunt through and the backlash of sentiments and emotions will not get to you. We are NIGERIANS. We think act, think and live 9ja so let's us drop this "it's only in Nigeria that people think like this , " cos that's who we are. We think about how our actions affects other people. Do not forget that there are children involved and the late guy also has family left behind. In as much as both of you can ward off the intruders what of the kids? how will they handle the whispers from their uncles and aunts ? The guy may have to contend with violent reactions from the late guy's kid.Put yourself in the place of the sibling of the late guy, how will you handle the fact that your brother is in a cold grave and HIS BEST FRIEND is getting with HIS WIFE?!!!
Now before you venture into such a journey you have to have it all figured out and it has to be for the very right reasons. I don't think I can handle it.
I quite agree with you. There're some actions invented or borrowed from other societies (i.e. Europe) that are not applicable in our society. Let's be cautious.



How so? She is morally obligated to remarry after the death of her husband.
Who says NO? But not to the closer friend of her late husband.
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by Ranoscky(m): 6:51am On Aug 08, 2010
shocked shocked shocked So dis topic stil dey exist? undecided
Re: Would You Marry Your Best Friend's Widow? by Nobody: 8:09am On Aug 08, 2010
I don't think I could, though this is purely hypothetical.

If faced with such a scenario in real life, my answer and reactions may well be different.

(1) (2) (3) (Reply)

Why Would A Lady Remain In An Abusive Relationship? / What Can A Woman Do If Her Husband Keeps Threatening Her With Death? / 5 Reasons You Should Quit An Abusive Relationship

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (0) (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2018 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 107
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.