Hello N/landers,

I met a guy who posed that question to me and thought to bring it down here for discussion.

Please tell me what u think.

Why not? if her husband consent to it and also with a condition that there will be nothing intimate between them

chaircover:

No
why? because even though you can vouch for yourself, you cannot vouch for the other person.
Also lets put the shoe on the other foot; how will wifey feel if hubby asks his caterer ex-girlfriend to cook and bring him lunch everyday at the office because his wife isn't good at cooking?

what are real friends for, if not to help you in your times of needs?!
would you rather they go and get a loan at the bank where the rates are sky high?

@poster
IMHO if there isnt any seedy/evil intent at the back of the mind of the lender and the partner is fully aware of the loan then why not? as long as they can keep up with the repayment!
sign a IOU and be done with it.

only if the husband agrees , but she may be opening  a can of worms that will rot her marriage . even if the man agrees he may have some difficulty dealing with it .

Not at all, cos it is an insult to the husband.
Also, it is an invitation to revamping what was there

Pittbaby:

only if the husband agrees , but she may be opening  a can of worms that will rot her marriage . even if the man agrees he may have some difficulty dealing with it .

Only a foolish husband would agree to such nonsense

Fhemmmy:

Only a foolish husband would agree to such nonsense

some women still have maintainfriendship with their exs even when married. if the wife and husband agree to it and their is no string attached  . . ,   . . .

@FHEMMMY
so what should they do if the ONLY person who could borrow them the money is EX and the husband is broke like a church mouse?!
i guess the reason for the loan is a very important one.

chaircover:

No matter what, one has to protect the other partners interest.

I will be a great disrespect on my part towards my husband for me to approach an ex-boyfriend for finanial assistance; I'd rather pay high bank interest rates and preserve my and my husbands pride than to stoop so low.

Anyway I know my husband wont agree to such nonsense, so I will be wasting my time even I broached such a subject

what if the husband agrees to it? or you think no husband will ever agree to such?

As for me NO.

Expose the dysfunction for what it is. Going outside to ex lovers, there is no excuse. I do not care how you justify it. Wrong is wrong.

i would understand that a husband would be reluctant because that will expose his broke self to the ex BF. . . . . . . . god forbid, lol.
she left the rich guy and now struggles financially with the guy she married. husband's ego will be bruised if the world knew that he couldnt man up!!

it depends on certain conditions.if they still maintain a good relationship,why not?without or with the husbands consent.without ,because the hubby probably likes his ego,definately wouldnt  give consent to an assistance from his wifes ex.but since they are really in need of cash,the wife could do it secretly.BUT NO STRINGS ATTACHED. If then,a string has to be attached,assistance should be seeked somewhere else.

luap:

Expose the dysfunction for what it is. Going outside to ex lovers, there is no excuse. I do not care how you justify it. Wrong is wrong.

Thats right

adamse:

it depends on certain conditions.if they still maintain a good relationship,why not?without or with the husbands consent.without ,because the hubby probably likes his ego,definately wouldnt  give consent to an assistance from his wifes ex.but since they are really in need of cash,the wife could do it secretly.BUT NO STRINGS ATTACHED. If then,a string has to be attached,assistance should be seeked somewhere else.

But remember that this days, no man wants to give out without attaching a string, not even to talk of ur ex GF for that matter, I tell you what, something will have to be attached. I dont think its the right thing to do, seek help from somewhere else to avoid some words you dont wanna hear somewhere later.

adamse:

it depends on certain conditions.if they still maintain a good relationship,why not?without or with the husbands consent.without ,because the hubby probably likes his ego,definately wouldnt  give consent to an assistance from his wifes ex.but since they are really in need of cash,the wife could do it secretly.BUT NO STRINGS ATTACHED. If then,a string has to be attached,assistance should be seeked somewhere else.

thats y i said a good relationship

It is not even encouraged to make Ex boy/girl a family's friend let alone to turn to he/she for financial assistance. Your Ex boy/girl when married can easily fall in love with you if given the slightest opportunity.

A responsible husband should disagree to that no matter how worst the case maybe.

i hear you Chair

Big-Man:

It is not even encouraged to make Ex boy/girl a family's friend let alone to turn to he/she for financial assistance. Your Ex boy/girl when married can easily fall in love with you if given the slightest opportunity.

A responsible husband should disagree to that no matter how worst the case maybe.

Thats very true. it doesnt take much for Ex boy/girl friend to re-ignite something when given the opportunity, am of the opinion that once married, you should have absolutely nothing else to do with your Ex.

chaircover:

No

why? because even though you can vouch for yourself, you cannot vouch for the other person.

Also lets put the shoe on the other foot; how will wifey feel if hubby asks his caterer ex-girlfriend to cook and bring him lunch everyday at the office because his wife isn't good at cooking?

thank you very much my sister. This is the best response so far

when a man continues to buy a woman panties as gifts he will one day want to see how they look on her

for me Hell No!

Really, i don't see anything wrong in it. It all depends on her husband and the relationship she has/keeps with ex, I really don't see anything wrong in it!  

I dont think it is alright!!!!! The lady would have killed the ego of her husband b4 her ex and beleive me, it can lead to something else

I dont think it is alright!!!!! The lady would have killed the ego of her husband b4 her ex and beleive me, it can lead to something else!

[size=16pt]@POSTER,
WHAT IF THE EX ASK FOR `THAT THING` IN RETURN FOR THE ASSISTANCE?[/size]

i don't it is alright at all. it is better to look for the assistance somewhere else

[size=16pt]

Missybabe:

i don't it is alright at all. it is better to look for the assistance somewhere else

IS THIS D MISSY B I KNOW?WERE U BANNED?[/size]

This scenario plays out all the time especially if the wife is a 'wise-girl'. And no the husband usually doesnt get to know. If the girl wants to keep things straight and let the husband know abt her intentions and he accepts, things can get unpredictable when they are out of the woods.

If a woman must then she must not disclose and she has to be prepared to deal with the emotional fallout of an extra marital relationship that often results esp if she keeps going back.

You also have the occasional shameless husband who will put their wives on the forbidden path for cash or contract.