flex04:
Getting a good job these days is becoming a major challenge especially for young graduates. However, many recruiters will tell you that there are jobs out there but a large proportion of applicants are simply unemployable. A hiring manager has penned the following parody and almost everyone can learn from it especially jobseekers…

Dear Applicant, I Don’t Think You Really Wanted That Job!

Dear Applicant,
You applied for a job and I called you for a phone interview but you never picked up your phone and you never called back. Did you think I was a stalker or your little nephew asking for money again?
I don’t think you really wanted that job!

Dear Applicant,
I advertised a vacancy and requested that people send in CVs. Your email arrived with a cover letter in the body of the mail. I was really impressed and could not wait to view your CV. There was only one problem. You forgot to attach the CV.
I did the unthinkable… I replied your email asking you to attach your CV and you did not reply me until the next day, without an apology. In any case, it was already too late.
I don’t think you really wanted that job!

Dear Applicant,
I advertised a vacancy and requested that people send in CVs. Your email arrived with an attachment but no subject nor message. All I saw in the body of the email was
‘Sent from my Blackberry Smartphone’
I don’t think you really wanted that job!

Dear Applicant,
I advertised a vacancy and requested that people send in CVs. Your email arrived forwarded from the last place you sent it to. And PS, there was no attachment.
I don’t think you really wanted that job!

Dear Applicant,
I advertised a vacancy and requested that people send in CVs. Your email came in with a short cover letter telling me how qualified you were for the role. You said your CV would convince me beyond all reasonable doubt that you were the one for the position. I opened your CV expecting soo much…. and I did not find one word that qualified you as right for the position. I even used Ctrl F to search for the keyword in the role and came up blank.
I don’t think you really wanted that job!

Dear Applicant,
You were invited for an interview and you arrived slightly late but in good time. I interviewed you and to be frank, you were OK. The only problem was…. You were dressed in a micro mini skirt and had huge false eyelashes.
In my humble opinion, I don’t think you really wanted that job!

I really would love to take a stab at reducing unemployment but job seekers make it so difficult for anyone to help them. And so this is me venting and pleading…..
Prove to me that you really want that job!

Signed,
Hiring Manager.

source: See Some of the Reasons You are not Getting Dream Jobs

Hofbrauhaus:
There are no jobs in Nigeria!!

Hofbrauhaus:
There are no jobs in Nigeria!!

Hofbrauhaus:
There are no jobs in Nigeria!!

abmendozer:
Huh! What is this one saying?
Dream job in Nigera, when you don't know someone that knows someone.
Issokay, you go tey.

Balyz:
Keep searching

Hofbrauhaus:


Lol..Only fools search for jobs. And only useless hopeless fools search for jobs in Nigeria..zoo nation!

Pentools:


Sorry OP I couldn't read all those not because u didn't scribble them well cus I actually read the first line and they quite seem interesting for job hunters.

However for me I'm actually not getting one cus I ain't applying, never did and never gonna do. I hate waiting to get paid only at the end of every month, I'm too hyperactive to report to the office by 8am n close by 4 or 5pm, Mondays through fridays and sometimes on weekends too, collecting paltries at the end of every 30days just to forget my dreams (modern day slavery) it's too boring and seems as evening Lagos traffic for my life and above all, I hate working under pressure or having to be a trash can where some dude posing as "boss" take out their horrible family and economic frustrated life out on, worst times you will be owned at the end of the month or get (sacked) thrown out to this ugly world unprepared.

Moreso, the best gift that can be given to any right thinking person is freedom and the best thing that can happen to anybody is to live his/her dreams regardless.

Signed,
Successful Entrepreneur/Self Employed.

#ChooseWisely!!!

Pentools:


Sorry OP I couldn't read all those not because u didn't scribble them well cus I actually read the first line and they quite seem interesting for job hunters.

However for me I'm actually not getting one cus I ain't applying, never did and never gonna do. I hate waiting to get paid only at the end of every month, I'm too hyperactive to report to the office by 8am n close by 4 or 5pm, Mondays through fridays and sometimes on weekends too, collecting paltries at the end of every 30days just to forget my dreams (modern day slavery) it's too boring and seems as evening Lagos traffic for my life and above all, I hate working under pressure or having to be a trash can where some dude posing as "boss" take out their horrible family and economic frustrated life out on, worst times you will be owned at the end of the month or get (sacked) thrown out to this ugly world unprepared.

Moreso, the best gift that can be given to any right thinking person is freedom and the best thing that can happen to anybody is to live his/her dreams regardless.

Signed,
Successful Entrepreneur/Self Employed.

#ChooseWisely!!!