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"We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" - Health (10) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Health / "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" (39992 Views)

Being AS Genotype As A Man Is Affecting My Plans Of Getting Married / AS Genotype Couples, Please I Need Your Advise / Possibility Of AA+AS Genotype Parent Give Birth To SS - Exper Opinion Needed (2) (3) (4)

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Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Neennycakes81: 9:21pm On Jul 15, 2018
EmpresFIDEL:
it is very difficult.. I have been addicted to him for 5years. so the only thing that want to separate us on this earth is genotype. it's very painfull
it seems you don't understand the challenges this will cost in future. See your doctor for more explanation
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by romenna: 9:23pm On Jul 15, 2018
Ziggylady:


Eyha!!..sorry to hear that..I have been very fortunate myself i must say.
that's fine
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Malawian(m): 9:27pm On Jul 15, 2018
osborn4u:
I understand your plight. I am AS and was in a relationship for the same number of years as you Stated. However, God was with me all the way. You won't believe that it was while we were already preparing for my wedding that i asked my then fiancee now wife to go and check her genotype because, she was oblivious of it. You needed to see my state while i waited for the result. It was worse than waiting to know ones HIV status after living a very promiscuous life. I prayed like never before while waiting for the result and as God would have it, it turned out that she was/is AA. I jumped for joy like I just won a billion dollar contract. My advice to you is to have absolute faith in God. See a true man of God if you are convinced that you are meant for each other. God is not the author of confusion and would not sanction what he knows would end badly. I have witnessed Gods miracle here in Benin ( Believers Ministries) first hand where God changed the story of one of the couple that intended to get married from AS to AA. Miracles are real but you also need to have an unwavering faith. Conclusively, don't proceed any further if God doesn't do it. Stay blessed
I am pretty sure you are a Pentecostal, the way you flash bible passages that only supports your preconceived position. Jesus Christ said " My people perish for lack of knowledge". Do not put God to a test!! that is what is referred to as "the sin of Judas".

2 Likes

Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by uncjay(m): 9:31pm On Jul 15, 2018
EmpresFIDEL:
it is very difficult.. I have been addicted to him for 5years. so the only thing that want to separate us on this earth is genotype. it's very painfull

Ma, its a good thing to be in love and know that your man love you with equal proportion or perhaps even more. However, in a case where your genotype have the prospect of resulting into bringing an SS in this world, hmmm, hmmm, I'd advise you take sometime to wash off all the emotional feelings you have and be realistic for once. The gamble you are about to play is something you will regret (I'm sorry I have to use that word).

If you are in Lagos, I'd advise that for once you visit LUTH, go to children ward specifically made for children with cancer and SS, and see what's going on there. The tears is nothing to worry about, because everybody there are use to crying, the pain and emotional trauma is what you should worry about.

My younger brother was admitted there because he had cancer, that's how I got to see for myself everything I heard and read about SS. We spent four years battling his life from the strong grip of cancer, but at the end, he did not survive it. He breath his last 2014 December. But one thing I conspicuously noticed throughout our stay was how all the SS patients are dying like ants. I mean, no single child survived it in that ward through out our stay. some will be discharged after the doctor say he's okay, only for them to get home and if lucky spend two days and he dies...

Financial wise, you really don't want to experience the financial involvement that comes with managing SS. most people in that ward were drained completely, even the very rich people, it is the most terrible and terrifying experience I ever had. A woman had all her four children as SS, I witnessed the death of three of them after she spent everything she had.

Ma, please the love you think you have now will disappear when reality is dawn on you. let go.

Let it go, save yourself the trauma.
shalom

3 Likes

Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by osborn4u: 9:36pm On Jul 15, 2018
[quote author=mamawin post=69410735]LOL!! LOL!! Like my husband would say, there're many things God can do, but there are a lot he won't do. Change genotype you say? LOL!![/quote Are you telling me you have not seen/heard God do something like that? Anyway, I have seen and it wasn't super story, I saw it live. God is still a miracle worker

1 Like

Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Nobody: 9:38pm On Jul 15, 2018
Don't be in a hurry to break up; and don't be in a hurry to get married as well.
Be very patient in taking your decision. Do your research and consider the prons n cons of your decision.
Be guided by reason, facts, reality and sound judgement, not emotion.
Go for counseling, you guys will need that.
And remember, it's your life. Enjoy it and take responsibility for each upcoming choice.
All the best.
[quote author=EmpresFIDEL post=69009188]please friends i really need your advice. I have been dating him for 5yrs now, we love each other so much . but our genotype is giving us serious issue, we are both As and we don't consider brake up as an option. the pressure on my boyfriend from family and friends is making him want to dissolve the relationship when he still love me deep down and I love him too.. we are just too confuse. I don't want to lose him. [/

1 Like

Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Lekanpleasant: 9:38pm On Jul 15, 2018
EmpresFIDEL:
it is very difficult.. I have been addicted to him for 5years. so the only thing that want to separate us on this earth is genotype. it's very painfull
.. Africans with out problems, even before you posted this as an educated fellow, you honestly know it’s not advisable to marry him but the stubbornness of loving him and love me to is leading you to what you can’t handle later in future. We can’t against the rules of genotype.. be careful and talk sense to yourself.
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Nobody: 9:40pm On Jul 15, 2018
[quote author=osborn4u post=69415640][/quote]
It is also advisable to act wisely than relying on God, that is why we have brains.

1 Like

Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by gp6liveth(m): 9:41pm On Jul 15, 2018
EmpresFIDEL:
please friends i really need your advice. I have been dating him for 5yrs now, we love each other so much . but our genotype is giving us serious issue, we are both As and we don't consider brake up as an option. the pressure on my boyfriend from family and friends is making him want to dissolve the relationship when he still love me deep down and I love him too.. we are just too confuse. I don't want to lose him.

I have read a sample of many post advising you. But I find it difficult to see anyone advising you to go spiritual on this issue.
When I have not got born again I have no faith to handle it. This made me to lose my date I love.
As am writing to u know I have found myself in same issue of AS AS. My faith has grown more than what I used to have.

I met my pastor today and also let him know that I know the consequences from a physical angle. He gave me a prayer point to work with for 7days..
I can't doubt the potency of God. Genotype is too little before Him. I have a strong faith that God is involved and He will give me testimonies

I will advise you to go spiritual. But if you faith can't carry please end the relationship and don't think emotions can't be broken.

1 Like

Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by gr8minds: 9:47pm On Jul 15, 2018
It's nevertoo late to break up
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Bigval5: 9:50pm On Jul 15, 2018
Nnamdiojukwu:
So you are still here,you this joy killer are you married?
Five years ago I received same advice from people like you,today my first daughter is two years with AA genotype, Christabel is seven months kicking well....what is wrong with you people,you put your trust in doctors more than God yet on Sunday you dress like say na u holy pass without put God first.
Which church do you even attend cos I am suspecting to be all this hail Mary that don't believed in God but Mary,I am very angry with you for given her that kind of advice.



Faith work wonders even today.
Iam a living testimony, I and my wife are As.
100-25=75.

Sorry how old are you please?

1 Like

Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Nobody: 9:56pm On Jul 15, 2018
Put love before reason and watch your feelings disappear in the face of excruciating pain.
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by billionman: 9:57pm On Jul 15, 2018
I'm an advocate of preventing giving birth to children with the sickle cell disease. This is easily done by avoiding marriage between carriers of the abnormal haemoglobin genotype (mostly S and C).

I recently conducted haemoglobin genotype testing for some young tertiary institution students after enlightening them on the dangers of not knowing their haemoglobin genotype before getting into a serious relationship.

My advice for you is that, it could be difficult for you now, but your sure bet is to quit the relationship. Medical science have made it possible to avoid the chances of birthing children with sickle cell disease just as stated in earlier comments but what about the huge financial stress and possibilities of failed procedures?

I met a couple recently who did amniocentesis genotype test for their unborn child to ascertain the hb genotype. Lo and behold it failed them despite using a renown diagnostic centre. Now they have an ailing child with SS with thalasemia syndrome. Their money is almost failing them. Not to talk of the almost dead love they once confessed to each other.
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by billionman: 10:06pm On Jul 15, 2018
gp6liveth:


I have read a sample of many post advising you. But I find it difficult to see anyone advising you to go spiritual on this issue.
When I have not got born again I have no faith to handle it. This made me to lose my date I love.
As am writing to u know I have found myself in same issue of AS AS. My faith has grown more than what I used to have.

I met my pastor today and also let him know that I know the consequences from a physical angle. He gave me a prayer point to work with for 7days..
I can't doubt the potency of God. Genotype is too little before Him. I have a strong faith that God is involved and He will give me testimonies

I will advise you to go spiritual. But if you faith can't carry please end the relationship and don't think emotions can't be broken.

I wouldn't want to disparage this your comment but I would advise you tread with caution. From my little experience, many have tolled this path you are about tolling and their experience wasn't palatable. I won't write much here cause of the sensitive nature of spirituality and science. But trust me, we've had experiences.
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Nobody: 10:08pm On Jul 15, 2018
Righteousness89:

Once u abort foetus, u are a Muderer....
seek Medical and Godly Counselling b4 u tie the knot
I just gave her the medical solution, personally, I believe it will be better to end such relationship, but is not really easy that why I gave her this advise.
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Unlimited22: 10:09pm On Jul 15, 2018
princeadams11:

Send me mail for solution to your problem
Why not tell her here?
Oponu apoda radarada undecided
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by raindrop99: 10:28pm On Jul 15, 2018
My immediate elder sister and her husband were both AS. They found out when they were abt 2 get married but the guy refused 2 give up.
He went into serious prayers 4 God Almighty to intervene becos he loves her so much. Lol and behold after series of prayers, he went 2 check his genotype and it has changed to AA.
It baffles everyone including myself till this day. They are both married now with a child.
If u guys are prayerful, then invite God into the situation for there is nothing too difficult 4 God Almighty to do.

3 Likes

Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Nobody: 10:30pm On Jul 15, 2018
delishpot:



To get pregnant and abort when they spot SS in fetus? You call that a good option? Have you ever been present during scan? Do you know that at a few weeks old tje jeart has started beating and baby is already a formed being? Na so she go dey get bele dey abort up and down ba? Whay if she has a few SS babies before rhe AS one comes along? She will abort them like its nothing ba?
Yap, that's the point, if she choose to stay with the guy, that's the only option she has.
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Nobody: 10:33pm On Jul 15, 2018
Yankee101:


You are ready to abort multiple times? You are a pig sha. Nope. Pig get respect for im own
Why so mean?
She's only asking for advise, if u can't give her then shut up

1 Like

Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by princeadams11: 10:33pm On Jul 15, 2018
Unlimited22:

Why not tell her here?
Oponu apoda radarada undecided
Because it's non of your business.
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Unlimited22: 10:34pm On Jul 15, 2018
princeadams11:

Because it's non of your business.
Alright. No strength. 2+2 = 5. You win.
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Azam101: 10:35pm On Jul 15, 2018
EmpresFIDEL:
what are the solutions
Dissolve the relationship shikenan.
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Amos87(m): 10:36pm On Jul 15, 2018
Amarabae:
my dear, listen to me.
If you marry him, both of you are AS,
That means that every child you bear has a 25% chance of being an SS.
It is a medical fact.
So are you guys ready for the gamble ?
What if you give birth to an SS?
Can you handle the economical, physical ,mental and emotional stress that comes with managing an SS child?
The best advice I will give you is to let the guy go!
Remember his family is now against the relationship, if both of you prove stubborn and get married and have an SS child, you will not get the support of the family.
The blame brigade will come out for you.
Let the guy go.
It's painful to say goodbye, I understand
Just let him go!
Unless you both will marry and adopt children without having any biological child,
I doubt it.
Let him go.
I repeat let him go
Auntie please, u dun hear am? Chicken wey no dey hear word go hear am inside a pot of soup, shekina.
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by SpencerM(m): 10:37pm On Jul 15, 2018
1st hand experience...i hate to remenba ds...my Friend was a Victim of ds... we served tugeda some years back.it was a tearful situations buh dey had to brk up...babe na sense una need now not Love...b wise

1 Like

Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Nobody: 10:38pm On Jul 15, 2018
Reference:


There are no practical solutions. It is a very irresponsible act to attempt to bring a child into this world that is in inherent risk by default. The physical trauma alone should be enough dissuation. But typically I do expect a Nigerian to go ahead as we are selfish and shallow thinkers. And the lady in question is talking about love as if she knows what love is.

The first proof of love is sacrifice. Ones wilĺingness to let go in the process of giving. True love will not allow her to continue with certain consequences. That rather seems to me like inconsideration and selfishness.
There are solution, read further comments, u will see, the price n stress is the problem.

1 Like

Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by chimeziedickson: 10:40pm On Jul 15, 2018
With all this uncountable issues associated with bringing in ss kids into this problem filled life especially 9ja at d moment.......U don't need anybody to advice u on calling it quit......So many good guys out there with d right genotype for you.Just open your eyes and commit it to God in prayers,he will never fail you.Gd luck!
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Nobody: 10:41pm On Jul 15, 2018
bigocean:
you abort it abi? Continue.
Instead of telling op how to avoid impending catastrophe by using her head at this early stage. You are here commissioning abortion .
Am telling the her options she's has, its left for her to decide, breaking up ain easy.
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Nobody: 10:44pm On Jul 15, 2018
tunjilana:
...Not just this IVF is also another option but the reality is cud start the journey and discover how stupid u were...firstly u may not get the financial support for IVF...ur wife wey u think say go work aggreasively with u in solving this may not even care...she may be all about being the regular Nigerian woman waiting to be collecting from u sef...As for genetic testing, wait till after the first abortion she gets cold feet, or starts dreaming about being dead or even ur pastor or whatever spiritual kead u have calling u that he sees danger ahead of u and advise ur wife to ensure she takes care of herself if she gets pregnant and never abort...my brother live for peace of mind
Ya, u are right, personally, I would go for break up, to have peace of mind. Am just letting the op know there are other options available apart from breaking up.
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Tadeus(m): 10:44pm On Jul 15, 2018
Godsgal:
Hmmm. Its painful letting go now but my dear, the pains of watching ur children suffer from ur mistake will be worse.

Honestly it’s painful dou but it’s beta to go ahead and quit. Talking from experience. Don’t make that stupid mistake. Quit now, within 3 to 6 months, you wil get over it and move on.

Ma candid advice
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Tadeus(m): 10:49pm On Jul 15, 2018
raindrop99:
My immediate elder sister and her husband were both AS. They found out when they were abt 2 get married but the guy refused 2 give up.
He went into serious prayers 4 God Almighty to intervene becos he loves her so much. Lol and behold after series of prayers, he went 2 check his genotype and it has changed to AA.
It baffles everyone including myself till this day. They are both married now with a child.
If u guys are prayerful, then invite God into the situation for there is nothing too difficult 4 God Almighty to do.

Typical African man way. Though our God is ever faithful buh same God gv us brain not to decorate our head but to make use of it
Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Bugos4real(m): 10:50pm On Jul 15, 2018
EmpresFIDEL:
it is very difficult.. I have been addicted to him for 5years. so the only thing that want to separate us on this earth is genotype. it's very painfull
both of u can still have normal babies with in vitro fertilization.The best sperm cell will be selected with this process.if u can afford the cost each time u want a baby, go ahead.

1 Like

Re: "We Are Both AS Genotype And We Don't Consider Break-Up As An Option" by Johnsown1(m): 10:51pm On Jul 15, 2018
I will advice u not to gamble with life and health issues, it may be hard to let go but u have to, its not easy to take care of SS carrier talking from the experience in my hood

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