My fiance cant leave his phone with me for 2mins. I told him that i wanted to check his pictures he refuted. He passworded his phone and gave me a wrong pin code. I dont have access to his phone but he do check mine regularly. What can you say to that ladies and guys? Pls am new on NL

It might be that Ur fiance knows he is not to be trusted and knowing so himself he is suspicious of Ur phone activities and tries to keep tabs on U.
I don't know what advice to give U yet if this is the case.

It also might be that Ur fiance has sensitive documents on his phone? (yeah right)

Or maybe he has pictures of real naked women or just porn he thinks U myt find offensive?

Whatever the case U need to talk to him about how U feel about him nt letting U go thru his phone.

Left for me sha everyone should just mind his/her phone. The person that is lacking in character won't sleep comfortably. The burden is theirs to bear.

U ar right. I dnt check his phone but when i notice that he checks mine freely i dcided to c if he subcribe 2 d motn dat says 'do 2 odas wat u expect dem 2 do 2 u'

Ur case is more like : Do unto others as u suspect that they are doing or will do unto U.

Express Ur discomfort with his manners to him as best as he would hear U out. If nothing better comes out of it U should brace urself and expect it to continue as it is or worsen.

There was this girl I was involved with whose phone I checked once when it was ok to call her my gf. Found an sms in it she had sent to some dude confessing love and saying she "wanted him." I confronted her and we ironed things out but after then fr a while if I went thru her phone and saw nothing, I'd feel she had deleted all of them. I didnt bother checking after a while cos that one event took away all the trust.

Are U sure U want to embrace the possible reality with Ur man?

Ther was a day we ar 2geda we were bot checkin his phone nd a mesage came in wit d content lyk 'do u tink am cheap,wat do u take me 4, ' i told him i nided explanatn bt he said he wasnt goin 2 discus it til he feels lyk. Alot of tins. Today he wil apear faithful 2mrow unfaithful. Alot of tins. I sent a text 2 him expresin mysef afta last 9t incidnt he didnt reply. Nd av dcided am nt goin 2 cal him

My dear, what u don't know won't hurt you. Just let go of the phone. U might read meaning into stuff u see and it might tear u both apart. Just enjoy him and damn his phone.

@Africn x.Tanx but wat he did does it make sense or wil it make rlatnship 2 wax stroner?

Gudgurl:

Ther was a day we ar 2geda we were bot checkin his phone nd a mesage came in wit d content lyk 'do u tink am cheap,wat do u take me 4, ' i told him i nided explanatn bt he said he wasnt goin 2 discus it til he feels lyk. Alot of tins. Today he wil apear faithful 2mrow unfaithful. Alot of tins. I sent a text 2 him expresin mysef afta last 9t incidnt he didnt reply. Nd av dcided am nt goin 2 cal him

People will treat U how U let them treat U.

What U don't know can hurt U and U myt never know it was what hurt U.

Pay more attention to what people do than to what they say. Saying "I love U" is one thing. Showing "I love U" or "I cherish Ur relationship with me" is another thing entirely.

What kind of relationship are U into? What are Ur guys beliefs concerning relationships? Is he open to "just dating"? Are U both thinking along similar lines? What does he want out of the relationship with U.

U know one thing bout relationships that lead to marriage? Things U allow in a relationship first get worse and have chaces of staying worse or geting worse than that still, more than they get better.

Even those things that get better get worse first before getting better and much work is required on the part of both parties.

He's getting calls and sms's now and hiding t from U possibly telling himself the usual lie "When I get married I will change." If that's true, when he does get married and finds it difficult to change and relapses to the old habit, He'l just quit and say it's his nature and many women will encourage him by saying "all men cheat."

Anyway, U should tell him and if worse comes to worse give him an ultimatum, however do it in a way that he doesn't take it as a threat but a loving demand for respect.

Tanx onched. In a situatn wherby he refuse 2 change,wat cud b done?

He has nt even cal or send mesage. Wil i b termed 'bad' i maintain my stand dat am nt goin 2 cal him?

Gudgurl:

He has nt even cal or send mesage. Wil i b termed 'bad' i maintain my stand dat am nt goin 2 cal him?

If U are termed bad for wanting to feel as important as u should be made to feel by a guy U are getting married to, then the earth needs more bad girls.

Love isnt a one way street. Even when it looks as if it is sometimes there just isnt as much traffic on the other side and it myt be cos of a hold up.
Ur case is not the case of a hold up.

One thing I despise is when people feel like they are doing their partner a favour being with them. If U feel like not calling him, don't. The worse that myt happen is U both have a fight which could provide the grounds for some revelations of the reality of things with him to come to light.

@gUDGURL--Since thats how he wana play, u too shud play along. Get a password for ur phone too and see what he has to say afterwards. dont let him knw, jus lock ur phone wit a code this minute, d nex time he picks up ur phone this will shock him.
"Do unto others , as they do unto u".

^^^ Brilliant. I don't agree with Ur closing but I think mirroring him will get his attention a lot easier.

You are not only engaged to a serial cheat, but an arrogant one! He doesn't even have respect for you! He'll explain 'when he feels like'!

I think you should ban him from touching your phone completely and when he asks you, tell him you'll explain 'wehn you feel like'!

Yes! I wil hang on 2 dat word 'respect' i tink he doesn't respect me.

Gudgurl:

Yes! I wil hang on 2 dat word 'respect' i tink he doesn't respect me.

You can use it to blackmail him. If he cares enough, he'll change.

But you good oh, a guy tells me that and he'll feel my frying pan on his head!

Ujujoan, our very own taliban of men issues. U want her to blackmail him? Hehehehe. Trust U to go by all's fair in love and war.

Onchedu:

Ujujoan, our very own taliban of men issues. U want her to blackmail him? Hehehehe. Trust U to go by all's fair in love and war.

It's a tough world we live in mon ami!

Only the strong can survive!   

Yeah! I feel U, in a way.

Yes oh, life requires strength. Expecialy rlatnshp. Just lyk d kingdom of God.

CASE CLOSED.

Gudgurl:

@Africn x.Tanx but wat he did does it make sense or wil it make rlatnship 2 wax stroner?

I'm very addicted to my phone, but not to the extent I can't leave it wit someone for 2mins. It makes sense if he's cheating or hidding some evil stuff he don't want u to know or maybe he's just protective of his phone. I don't know I can't tell but what I know is its not fair. It doesn't make a relationship stronger cos u'll wondering and u'll keep doubting. Soon there'll be a bricks wall between you two. Tell him how you feel while u ban him from touching you phone too. If he doesn't change. . . Well. . .

I told him he disrespectd me wit wat he did. He said if by nt alowing me 2 check his phone meant disrespectd dat he wil continue 2 do dat. Nd i reminded him dat he do check mine nd he anytym he does dat i shud cal him any names. Na wa oo

that ur guy seff

Shey? Som guys ar funy. I wishd i neva fel in luv

Falling in love is not where things went wrong. maybe U fell for the wrong person or the right person at the wrong time. Maybe U both just didnt nurture the relationship properly enough?

i dont think its her fault the guy is insecure dont u think? with him checking her phone and all.

Gudgurl:

I told him he disrespectd me wit wat he did. He said if by nt alowing me 2 check his phone meant disrespectd dat he wil continue 2 do dat. Nd i reminded him dat he do check mine nd he anytym he does dat i shud cal him any names. Na wa oo

Have you tried banging his head with a frying pan    

Actually, there's no big deal in this phone thing, it's the way your guy is going about it, haba! Is he okay? He's just too arrogant for my liking!  

daduke2k:

i dont think its her fault the guy is insecure dont u think? with him checking her phone and all.

Asking me?

daduke2k:

i dont think its her fault the guy is insecure dont u think? with him checking her phone and all.

He's not insecure, just a controlling SOB!