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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs (6749 Views)
My Husband Won't Provide For Me And Children / Parents How Will You Feel If You Come Back Home & Meet Your Children Like This? / "Deny Your Husband Sex" - Leaked Chats Of A Cheating Wife (2) (3) (4)
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by KanwuliaExtra: 6:47pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
cococandy: Absolutely correct! Only because I live in the U.S.A. I am an American Feminista only , but an African woman who is used to dealing with ONLY AFRICAN/NIGERIAN MEN. Don’t be too emotionally needy. Never GIVE more than you receive or you get ripped off, used and abused. Dem nor dey appreciate o, but they want you to GIVE YOUR ALL. Never beg for money or honey. No OLOSHO work or Sugar Daddy to pay for hia o. On your own! O. Y. O.! I love it. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by KanwuliaExtra: 7:03pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
crackhaus: Now we are talking! Levels please! 2 Likes |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by Greatzeus(m): 9:17pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
crackhaus:Expository what? Just comment and stop pretending that you read that aimless crap up there, cos you didn't 2 Likes |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by crackhaus: 9:34pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
Greatzeus:I did not read it? 3 Likes |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by crackhaus: 9:41pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
KanwuliaExtra:Congratulations on your levels. |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by KanwuliaExtra: 9:45pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by crackhaus: 9:49pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
KanwuliaExtra:Many already did. |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by KanwuliaExtra: 10:01pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
crackhaus: Are you one? |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by KanwuliaExtra: 10:06pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
chisco82: Is that the topic for discussion? Na for NL I go tell my tory? Tufiakwa! 2 Likes |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by crackhaus: 10:09pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
KanwuliaExtra:30 years in marriage? I'm not that old Does this now invalidate the fact that MANY people have crossed that milestone? |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by KanwuliaExtra: 10:10pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
crackhaus: Which milestone? Longevity in marriage or emotional/sexual satisfaction? |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by crackhaus: 10:17pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
KanwuliaExtra:Longetivity in marriage is what I congratulated you for, not your emotional/sexual satisfaction which can't be proven by any measure. |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by KanwuliaExtra: 1:46am On Jul 11, 2018 |
crackhaus: Longevity is more important to me. Satisfaction? With a Nigerian man? NEVER. First to quench. . . . Is the name of the game! |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by Nobody: 2:39am On Jul 11, 2018 |
KanwuliaExtra:Lol! Okay naa, feel free to tell me via pm |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by KanwuliaExtra: 2:41am On Jul 11, 2018 |
chisco82: Habaaaaaaaa. . . . ! PM ke? This na 2018 o. PM still dey reign? |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by Nobody: 4:34am On Jul 11, 2018 |
KanwuliaExtra:Wetin you wan say make i talk naa, abi u go tell oga Seun make him remove the Pm button since this is 2018. Wetin dey reign, how u wan tell me naa? |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by andrey1985: 8:57am On Jul 11, 2018 |
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Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by KanwuliaExtra: 9:04am On Jul 11, 2018 |
chisco82: Gooooood morning! Abeg, lef my mata o. I ain’t gat nothing to tell! I don’t do PMs, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, Mindspace, IMO or whatever. I don’t discuss my private life. The gist wey I dey gist for NL nor get anything to do with my private life. The dey I go open thread to ask for ADVICE or HELP, feel free! *tufiakwa to the highest pawa* |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by bukatyne(f): 5:08pm On Jul 11, 2018 |
crackhaus: I am sure you meant 11 out of 15. Who wouldn't be grateful for 11? |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by bukatyne(f): 5:49pm On Jul 11, 2018 |
enabledgoddess: Good one. Want to give vague examples of some needs you are referring to? |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by bukatyne(f): 5:59pm On Jul 11, 2018 |
KanwuliaExtra: Hahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaha at 'African wife'. I agree sha the concept of needs met and what not is a 'foreign concept' in typical Nigerian marriages. Husband provide, wife cares for the family and everyone finds their 'fulfilment' in drinks, children, side chics, gossip partners, witchcraft, work, age groups etc. It is our generation that talks about needs. It is will interesting to study the correlation between 'destruction' (for lack of a better word) of the extended family and growth of unmet 'needs' in marriage. |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by bukatyne(f): 6:00pm On Jul 11, 2018 |
crackhaus: True at the 'irreconcilable differences' |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by bukatyne(f): 6:17pm On Jul 11, 2018 |
cococandy: Hahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaha at 'American wife'. The American wife proper will start from your daughter because she is born and brought up there. You are still looking at Oyinbo things with Nigerian eyes. Like you said, you saw what ingratitude did to a relationship and made a conscious effort not to be like that. Well, our men will be able to ascertain if most women are not like that. The customer (husband) determines the value of the (wife). Ditto the wife. I however agree that most women would not have all the issues... one here, one there. On a different note: a lot of men complain about not getting sex from their wives so..... Re understanding: if my husband said 'babe, do this (99.99% cooking)' and put me in a tight corner e.g. ask where someone is, I would do it well (I love food looking and tasting good so my tiredness/reluctance has no effect on it. His appreciation makes me super duper irritated. A better appreciation would not to put me in a tight spot. I would also feel this way irrespective of the person. 1 Like |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by enabledgoddess(f): 6:36pm On Jul 11, 2018 |
bukatyne: Both emotional, physical and financial. For example, I used to expect him to automatically know when I'm sad and to guess right and do exactly what I want even when I don't ask. I used to expect him to buy all I say we need without agreeing to wait. If he say wait I just withdraw till I force him to even when not convenient. Physically, for example he often help me take the hanger out to spread my cloth. One day I woke him up to take the hanger out. He said wait let me rest a bit I got sad . but since I have learnt to wait and do what I can do myself and communicate more and expect less and told myself I can be happy. Guess what, we quarrel less and he's seem happier too and the sex have increased because fight has reduced. Lol I used to complain about him not being appreciative, now he appreciates and sends thank you messages from work. Truly, men can't meet all our needs so why hang our happiness to that ? 1 Like |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by bukatyne(f): 9:51pm On Jul 11, 2018 |
enabledgoddess: Thanks a lot for the detailed response. Three points I picked: More patience; Communicating better in plainer terms; Reducing expectations. I am sure the patience and waiting part did the most magic and so happy that sex has increased . See how changing yourself also brought out the 'qualities' you thought he didn't have. A number of lessons to be learnt. Good one. 2 Likes |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by mgtow: 10:52pm On Jul 11, 2018 |
Insightful piece! Unrealistic expectations have always been the bane of many a relationships/marriages, especially on the part of the woman. This is because their wants are endless. Generally, men all over the world turn to pudding so far we are provided with good food, sex, respect, appreciation and above all, peace of mind. We are so simple it really should be annoying. #OkBye 1 Like |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by bukatyne(f): 9:20am On Jul 12, 2018 |
mgtow: The men will turn to pudding if they appreciate it else they are like the women in the OP. So where are you going to? |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by jaksmillioniar: 1:24pm On Jul 12, 2018 |
KanwuliaExtra:baby did u live in america |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by jaksmillioniar: 1:26pm On Jul 12, 2018 |
bukatyne:I see ur mention dear am on ban will reply later |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by crackhaus: 9:17pm On Jul 12, 2018 |
bukatyne:A robot would better serve such a wife, not a husband. 1 Like |
Re: Why Your Husband Won't Meet Your Needs by crackhaus: 9:22pm On Jul 12, 2018 |
bukatyne:Yup.. It's just a fancy phrase for 'we are tired, can't stand each other anymore, and too proud to work it out'. |
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