HEseesall:



When he told me he wants to use his share for his parents, we agreed my share would be used for get a property then we start to build from there and that's what i did, i expected he knows i would use my name cos i keep the documents, now he is saying he wants his own name only not jointly, who says that pls, at least i compromised for jointly,

So its now you want to use "jointly"?

Even if your share is 60%, why would you use your name alone? Now that he has known and wants what you did to be reversed 360 degrees, you're now preaching "compromise", jointly bla bla bla. Na just property, 1 fire alone is enough to send it back to 0.

The way some of us carry properties for head like we will need it in the world beyond.

Evacroft:


Amen,thanks for the compliment. God bless u too.

Hope u later got to read the husband's side of the story. Especially the part where he had to fly his sick father abroad for treatment. She conveniently hid that part by saying he used his own part of the money for "his parents". Making light the situation of things just so she'll appear as "the helper". And she also said they had a " disagreement " without telling us how she insulted her husband's background because she came from a rich family... Na this type of woman go call her husband "useless" in the presence of their children. I hope she's enjoying the house now sha.

Jesusgirl92:
Hope u later got to read the husband's side of the story. Especially the part where he had to fly his sick father abroad for treatment. She conveniently hid that part by saying he used his own part of the money for "his parents". Making light the situation of things just so she'll appear as "the helper". And she also said they had a " disagreement " without telling us how she insulted her husband's background because she came from a rich family... Na this type of woman go call her husband "useless" in the presence of their children. I hope she's enjoying the house now sha.

Oh madam the judge
Did you take your time to read every of the lady's posts?

She has just 10posts
Read it all
I mean all of it

bukatyne:


He wants to fully own a house he did not build?

Hmmmm.

You said your husband is a good man; you are the only person with the licence to declare him good so he is.

The next question is 'What did you do to piss off a good husband so much that he wanted you to pack out and when you couldn't, abandoned you in the house?'

good question

Dyt:



Oh madam the judge
Did you take your time to read every of the lady's posts?

She has just 10posts
Read it all
I mean all of it

madam jury, I read all thanks. And I stated in my first post that he was wrong to have asked her to pack out and told her to change the property to his name alone. But she betrayed his trust. How on earth would you do that to your husband after you both planned to build together?? Huh?? What was her initial plan of buying the property in her name without even informing him to begin with?? If she knew she did right, why did she keep it away till they had that major disagreement so she could hit him hard with it??

justjeff:
he is not a gentleman. I just wonder what action he will take if it's in his name. In marriage what belongs to you also belongs to him. I feel your pain but don't change the name. At most let it be joint. He will regret his actions. Just stay cool and talk less. Silence is golden

you read her own side alone and judged the matter. Please go and read the husband's side of the story and add both together. Then u would see how she just came here for the sake of cheap points. She's the one ruining the family.

adieora:
Madam, I beg in the name of common sense do not, I repeat do not change the name on that document. Don't even change it to Mr and Mrs. Couples are allowed to have separate investments. Your husband is wicked and manipulative. Change it and u will be here in a few years crying about how you have been kicked out. He will calm down and come home . If he doesn't byeee to him. Very very manipulative man.

madam, it's just a property. Are u even married at all? I'm sure u yourself wouldn't do what you're asking her to do. And before u on the husband being maipulative, go and read his side of the story, then come back and re advise.

Jesusgirl92:
madam jury, I read all thanks. And I stated in my first post that he was wrong to have asked her to pack out and told her to change the property to his name alone. But she betrayed his trust. How on earth would you do that to your husband after you both planned to build together?? Huh?? What was her initial plan of buying the property in her name without even informing him to begin with?? If she knew she did right, why did she keep it away till they had that major disagreement so she could hit him hard with it??

Wehdone ma

Dyt:


Wehdone ma

Thank you.

Jesusgirl92:
Hope u later got to read the husband's side of the story. Especially the part where he had to fly his sick father abroad for treatment. She conveniently hid that part by saying he used his own part of the money for "his parents". Making light the situation of things just so she'll appear as "the helper". And she also said they had a " disagreement " without telling us how she insulted her husband's background because she came from a rich family... Na this type of woman go call her husband "useless" in the presence of their children. I hope she's enjoying the house now sha.

You are just blaming the woman left, right and centre without even offering the couple any single advice, on how to resolve the present situation. Na wa, o! Even the woman has tried to make amends, by offering to change the title deeds of the property to their joint names - Mr & Mrs Somebody. But the man refused, saying it must be in his name alone! Didn't they both contribute to the building of the property?

He even moved out, seeking transfer to another state, while abandoning his wife & family, instead of trying to bring the issue under control. Yet you are still busy insulting & blasting the woman. Very few people said her actions were right. She has shown remorse, and is begging the husband. Yet, you are too busy itemising her sins, one by one without doing the same for the husband, too. Even Jesus offered solutions to every problem on earth. He never compounded it.

LaudableXX:

You are just blaming the woman left, right and centre without even offering the couple any single advice, on how to resolve the present situation. Na wa, o! Even the woman has tried to make amends, by offering to change the title deeds of the property to their joint names - Mr & Mrs Somebody. But the man refused, saying it must be in his name alone! Didn't they both contribute to the building of the property?

He even moved out, seeking transfer to another state, while abandoning his wife & family, instead of trying to bring the issue under control. Yet you are still busy insulting & blasting the woman. Very few people said her actions were right. She has shown remorse, and is begging the husband. Yet, you are too busy itemising her sins, one by one without doing the same for the husband, too. Even Jesus offered solutions to every problem on earth. He never compounded it.

. They should just forgive each other if not for anything at least for the sake of their children. She for no bring am come NL to begin with. Marriage is not suppose to be a public affair.

He has NOT abandoned his children. He said he would rent a house and bring his kids. The woman decided to START a fight UNPROVOKED not knowing how much damage it can cause, now she is looking for pity... whatever she gets she deserves it since she decide to act TOXIC.

The husband has the freedom to refuse her apology.

Read his side of the story.

LaudableXX:

You are just blaming the woman left, right and centre without even offering the couple any single advice, on how to resolve the present situation. Na wa, o! Even the woman has tried to make amends, by offering to change the title deeds of the property to their joint names - Mr & Mrs Somebody. But the man refused, saying it must be in his name alone! Didn't they both contribute to the building of the property?

He even moved out, seeking transfer to another state, while abandoning his wife & family, instead of trying to bring the issue under control. Yet you are still busy insulting & blasting the woman. Very few people said her actions were right. She has shown remorse, and is begging the husband. Yet, you are too busy itemising her sins, one by one without doing the same for the husband, too. Even Jesus offered solutions to every problem on earth. He never compounded it.

Change the name to your first son's name, if no son, your first daughter.

EmmaFitBody:
He has NOT abandoned his children. He said he would rent a house and bring his kids. The woman decided START a fight UNPROVOKED not knowing how much damage it can cause, now she is looking for pity... whatever she gets she deserves it.

Read his side of the story.

His side of the story has been read and digested. Nothing more for him to add. The woman did not start a fight unprovoked. His conduct gave rise to allegations of cheating, which his wife accused him of. Instead of providing proof to show he was not cheating, or trying to allay his wife's fears, he mishandled the situation. And the wife's insults got out of hand.

I agree that the wife went overboard with her insults, but what kind of man just refuses to go back to his home over a property issue? You claim he has not abandoned his children. Ok, are the wife & children currently living with him, in his new place? Is he the one taking care of them, right now? Isn't he the one who moved out despite the wife's pleading? He said he would rent a house and bring his kids. When would this activity be carried out? Do you know? What if it takes 6 months, 1 year or 2 years to achieve? Don't forget that he has asked for a transfer to a totally different state, o!

I always make and receive calls right in front of her but she still think i'm hiding something and that was the genesis of the problem weeks ago, i rebuked her to cut it out immediately but she was out for blood, she insulted me like never before, when i didnt give her face, she extended her TOXIC words to my parents, my family, my background and my personality, that was when i lost it...

A woman accusing her husband of infidelity when there is ZERO proof warants an angry response. I repeat she started the fight UNPROVOKED... she never anticipated how much damage her utterances would cause.

If my brother accuses me of stealing when there is no proof (and I didn't steal) I would get offended... the same if my girlfriend accuses me of cheating!

LaudableXX:

His side of the story has been read and digested. Nothing more for him to add. The woman did not start a fight unprovoked. His conduct gave rise to allegations of cheating, which his wife accused him of. Instead of providing proof to show he was not cheating, or trying to allay his wife's fears, he mishandled the situation. And the wife's insults got out of hand.

I agree that the wife went overboard with her insults, but what kind of man just refuses to go back to his home over a property issue? You claim he has not abandoned his children. Ok, are the wife & children currently living with him, in his new place? Is he the one taking care of them, right now? Isn't he the one who moved out despite the wife's pleading? He said he would rent a house and bring his kids. When would this activity be carried out? Do you know? What if it takes 6 months, 1 year or 2 years to achieve? Don't forget that he has asked for a transfer to a totally different state, o!

Jesusgirl92:
Hope u later got to read the husband's side of the story. Especially the part where he had to fly his sick father abroad for treatment. She conveniently hid that part by saying he used his own part of the money for "his parents". Making light the situation of things just so she'll appear as "the helper". And she also said they had a " disagreement " without telling us how she insulted her husband's background because she came from a rich family... Na this type of woman go call her husband "useless" in the presence of their children. I hope she's enjoying the house now sha.

Madam she did not hide the sick parent part, if you read past page 0 of this thread you will see it.

You are not saying anything about the part of his share he used to build for his own parent

She said they had a disagreement the husband went into details she insulted the man, yes she was wrong but something triggered that- allegations of cheating which everyone is avoiding talking about.

She never mentioned she was from a rich family, the husband did.

The husband's story and the wife's story are the same, she did notlie or say anything about being from a rich home stop making it sound that way.

EmmaFitBody:
A woman accusing her husband of infidelity when there is ZERO proof warants an angry response. I repeat she started the fight UNPROVOKED... she never anticipated how much damage her utterances would cause.

If my brother accuses me of stealing when there is no proof (and I didn't steal) I would get offended... the same if my girlfriend accuses me of cheating!

It was not unprovoked. There is something he must have said or done, that gave rise to the allegations of cheating. Read the man's story here: https://www.nairaland.com/4629255/husbands-pride-wants-ruin-home. He went verbally ballistic, because there was some truth to her comments. If your wife or girlfriend accuses you of cheating, your best bet is not to lose your temper, but to set the records straight. No woman would accuse a man of cheating out of the blue, if something did not provoke it. Basic Psychology 101. Her insults though, went overboard.

Mr. Man, you don't know all women. Why hasn't she stated her proof that he was cheating? why? She should have stated it.... guess what? She has no proof. She mistakenly decided to stir up trouble based on a passing suspicion (which is NOT evidence of anything).

He answered a phone call and she decided to accuse him. If you know basic psychology then you would know that people are NOT always logical.... some women can stir a storm in a tea cup.

No need for debate, he has made his decision and whether you or I think he is wrong or right, he has made his decision.

LaudableXX:


It was not unprovoked. There is something he must have said or done, that gave rise to the allegations of cheating. He went verbally ballistic, because there was some truth to her comments. If your wife or girlfriend accuses you of cheating, your best bet is not to lose your temper, but to set the records straight. No woman would accuse a man of cheating out of the blue, if something did not provoke it. Basic Psychology 101. Her insults though, went overboard.

NoToPile:


Madam she did not hide the sick parent part, if you read past page 0 of this thread you will see it.

You are not saying anything about the part of his share he used to build for his own parent

She said they had a disagreement the husband went into details she insulted the man, yes she was wrong but something triggered that- allegations of cheating which everyone is avoiding talking about.

She never mentioned she was from a rich family, the husband did.

The husband's story and the wife's story are the same, she did notlie or say anything about being from a rich home stop making it sound that way.

She would never talk about what transpired in the heat of the argument na... Because she doesn't want us to know the kind of insults she rained on him because she wanted to appear as the saint. If truely she had proof of the husband cheating, don't you think she would have mentioned it in her post? Why did she avoid to talk about that part? She just termed it "disagreement". #yinmu.... I duff my cap for her abeg

mark2sunny:



You're a Product of a broken home. Your alternator isn't charging your battery.

Thanks.

My comment hurt u so much because u are in d same boat with d f**king asshole

Jesusgirl92:
She would never talk about what transpired in the heat of the argument na... Because she doesn't want us to know the kind of insults she rained on him because she wanted to appear as the saint. If truely she had proof of the husband cheating, don't you think she would have mentioned it in her post? Why did she avoid to talk about that part? She just termed it "disagreement". #yinmu.... I duff my cap for her abeg

She also did not tell us she brought the business idea that brought the huge profits in the first place, she did not tell us she married below her social class, she did not tell us what caused their argument aka suspicions of cheating, (the husband did this all by himself) also what the husband said in the heat of their argument.
So many things she did not tell us because they would have made the narrative too long or even make some people belittle her husband. That doesn't mean she was trying to hide anything or avoiding anything.
She sounds like a woman who just wants peace, despite it all and yet at the same time doesn't want to get cheated.

aariwa:
As a lawyer I would advice that you contact your lawyer to amend the title to joint ownership between the both of you as the law deems any property purchased after marriage as a communal property.Also don't forget to register it with the land registry as an unregistered property is almost as worthless as a piece of paper

Would the law courts still consider it as marital property when they both shared the money equally and she used hers to purchase property?
I'm thinking that could be argued, as the man has received his own share of that particular marital wealth. I'm sure there would be bank documents showing they shared that money, and also her own transfers in buying the property. This is just a discourse o, because you said you're a lawyer.

HEseesall:



You dont understand, we have kids, i am working but i cant do everything on my own, how will i tell them we are no more together because of property

What a loyal wife she is!

Continue...

HEseesall:
I had to open this account for anonymity
I'm in a dilemma, let me start like this, when i and my husband first got married we did a joint business that fetched us a huge amount of money, the aim was to build a house, when we got the money, he decided to use his' for his parents (i had no problem with that) then mine for what we wanted to use it for

Two weeks ago we had a major misunderstanding, it was soo intense to the extent that he told me to park out of the house, in the heat of things i told him that cannot be possible that the house is in my name, he was shocked, saying it is impossible we built it together that it's in his name, i had to remind him what happened then, he was furious saying it was wrong of me to use my name, that he cant believe he has been staying in a house that does not belong to him, he told his family what i did claming victim, then he packed out saying he wont come home till i change the name to his full name, i begged him to no avail, i dont even know how to tell my people, imagine if it was in his name, i and the kids would have been out of the house by now, he has requested for transfer from his office to another state cos of this, who does that?? He cant expect me to change it to his name.

Pls i need other advise to go about this, he is a good man but he feels his ego has been bruised, i need other options.


MODIFIED For those viewing this, i have made some clarifications down to page (1),

You are not a wife to him but a dubious business partner. He is right to want to relocate and leave you and the house alone.

peepydelano:
madam we have read your husband's part of the story and I will advice you to handle this issue with wisdom (a very high percentage of it).Firstly,rule out divorce from it as he also clearly stated he won't want that.Now the ball is in your court,he's obviously a good man and you confirm that too,you kind of bruised his ego with your words and actions, you should also be aware that as a man and from your different backgrounds, you should treat and handle him with wisdom often,you can own something and still assume he's the owner and let him boss over it( there are things you can't totally change about a man),give him some sense of pride,give am small ego chop.we lived in my mums house for ten years and believe me no one ever knew till my dad got his(not even us d kids bak den)my dad had the controls,you could have just waved it off when he said you should pack out kos u knew too he didn't really mean it,never take words said out of anger serious till d person takes some practical moves.Can't you just meet him privately and beg him,tell him you will change d name to his alone to calm his nerves and I bet u he will tell u no need for DAT and u both can include ur names kos he's not a wicked man as u also confirm, then u settle d rest in za ozza room.After all dis,tell family members to calm nerves and maintain their space as u av taken charge of ur home and DAT u chose peace instead of fight. As a mother there are things you must sacrifice for the sake of ur children. pls b wise in ur dealings, don't break your home by yourself.peace.

What kind of CRAPPY advice is this? Why don't you just come out and tell the woman to be a door mat? She should beg to keep her husband, beg him to take the house, BEG, BEG, BEG. With this kind of advice she will still be begging him when he is taking a second wife.

HEseesall:

@HEseesall I am glad that you are trying to compromise and you offered to change ownership of the house to you and your husband. Marriage is all about compromise and you have taken the first step. However DO NOT and I repeat DO NOT change ownership of the house to your husband's name alone!!

Your husband already told you to pack out of the house when he thought that the house was in your name. Imagine what he will do when the house is actually in his name! I am also a father and I can't fathom how a man would leave his wife and children just because of an argument. Try your best to reconcile with your husband, but REMEMBER YOU HAVE TO LOOK OUT FOR YOURSELF AND YOUR KIDS FIRST!

sevule:


What kind of CRAPPY advice is this? Why don't you just come out and tell the woman to be a door mat? She should beg to keep her husband, beg him to take the house, BEG, BEG, BEG. With this kind of advice she will still be begging him when he is taking a second wife.


@HEseesall I am glad that you are trying to compromise and you offered to change ownership of the house to you and your husband. Marriage is all about compromise and you have taken the first step. However DO NOT and I repeat DO NOT change ownership of the house to your husband's name alone!!

Your husband already told you to pack out of the house when he thought that the house was in your name. Imagine what he will do when the house is actually in his name! I am also a father and I can't fathom how a man would leave his wife and children just because of an argument. Try your best to reconcile with your husband, but REMEMBER YOU HAVE TO LOOK OUT FOR YOURSELF AND YOUR KIDS FIRST!

urs became more crappy afterall, learn to set space for peace in situations like this,she started d whole brouhaha and she alone can quench it.this is marriage not dating,it doesn't work your ways.shes got a lot to do to salvage this union,so mind what you say .

She has won... he doesn't want the property anymore and he has made his decision. It doesn't matter if anybody approves of it or not.

sevule:


What kind of CRAPPY advice is this? Why don't you just come out and tell the woman to be a door mat? She should beg to keep her husband, beg him to take the house, BEG, BEG, BEG. With this kind of advice she will still be begging him when he is taking a second wife.


@HEseesall I am glad that you are trying to compromise and you offered to change ownership of the house to you and your husband. Marriage is all about compromise and you have taken the first step. However DO NOT and I repeat DO NOT change ownership of the house to your husband's name alone!!

Your husband already told you to pack out of the house when he thought that the house was in your name. Imagine what he will do when the house is actually in his name! I am also a father and I can't fathom how a man would leave his wife and children just because of an argument. Try your best to reconcile with your husband, but REMEMBER YOU HAVE TO LOOK OUT FOR YOURSELF AND YOUR KIDS FIRST!

nikenry:
Look before you leap.

Just take a deep breath. Imagine what would have happened if you have used his name instead, and he had ordered you to park out of the house! Where would you have been? Where will your children have been?

Just stay calm. Things will normalize, but the two of you must be ready to shift ground. You may consider using Mr and Mrs on the land document.

The fact that the man did not take a look at the documents tells you that he is not materialistic.....he is not too crazy about property. Ask the woman what she did to have made the husband to ask her to get out. She must have hurt him real deep with words..... Only the married can understand this.


This lady is not a wife but a partner...probably she did partnership accounting and took the principle into marriage. Jow can you explain that a wife got a property that was planned between the two parties in her maiden name. Refers to the business return as his share and my share. And that he spent his own returns on his parents.


This kind will ruin a chance at a big breakthrough for the husband because she doesn't see the husband success as hers until it is written down in her name or a percentage is expressly written in her favour..... She is not trained to be a under any man but as an equal



The union is threatened by her conduct. She may retain the property after all but let her prepare her mind for a bigger surprise, going forward, for she has taught the man a very useful lesson on, my own and your own. This issue would encourage the man to worker harder and independently and be indifferent to her and her activities.

Themandator:





The fact that the man did not take a look at the documents tells you that he is not materialistic.....he is not too crazy about property. Ask the woman what she did to have made the husband to ask her to get out. She must have hurt him real deep with words..... Only the married can understand this.


This lady is not a wife but a partner...probably she did partnership accounting and took the principle into marriage. Jow can you explain that a wife got a property that was planned between the two parties in her maiden name. Refers to the business return as his share and my share. And that he spent his own returns on his parents.


This kind will ruin a chance at a big breakthrough for the husband because she doesn't see the husband success as hers until it is written down in her name or a percentage is expressly written in her favour..... She is not trained to be a under any man but as an equal



The union is threatened by her conduct. She may retain the property after all but let her prepare her mind for a bigger surprise, going forward, for she has taught the man a very useful lesson on, my own and your own. This issue would encourage the man to worker harder and independently and be indifferent to her and her activities.

Exactly.

Themandator:





The fact that the man did not take a look at the documents tells you that he is not materialistic.....he is not too crazy about property. Ask the woman what she did to have made the husband to ask her to get out. She must have hurt him real deep with words..... Only the married can understand this.


This lady is not a wife but a partner...probably she did partnership accounting and took the principle into marriage. Jow can you explain that a wife got a property that was planned between the two parties in her maiden name. Refers to the business return as his share and my share. And that he spent his own returns on his parents.


This kind will ruin a chance at a big breakthrough for the husband because she doesn't see the husband success as hers until it is written down in her name or a percentage is expressly written in her favour..... She is not trained to be a under any man but as an equal



The union is threatened by her conduct. She may retain the property after all but let her prepare her mind for a bigger surprise, going forward, for she has taught the man a very useful lesson on, my own and your own. This issue would encourage the man to worker harder and independently and be indifferent to her and her activities.

Nicely put, have you seen the husband's thread? i'd like know your view on that too

Oga, she started the fight unprovoked. The man doesn't password his phones and he answered the call in her presence meaning he has nothing to hide. She started a fight without proof if NOT she would have stated it. How can she insult his family, background, parents, personality simply because he refused to tolerate bad behaviour (false accusation of infidelity)? It really tells the kind of TOXIC person she is and how she regards her husband.

Let her come and tell us the proof she had for accusing him of cheating... like other guy said, SHE HAS NO PROOF!

And incase you don't know this: some women are PARANOID! Some women can cause trouble over little things... I have seen a case where a woman accused her husband of cheating because of a dream she had. (Since when is a dream proof of anything?)

LaudableXX:


It was not unprovoked. There is something he must have said or done, that gave rise to the allegations of cheating. Read the man's story here: https://www.nairaland.com/4629255/husbands-pride-wants-ruin-home. He went verbally ballistic, because there was some truth to her comments. If your wife or girlfriend accuses you of cheating, your best bet is not to lose your temper, but to set the records straight. No woman would accuse a man of cheating out of the blue, if something did not provoke it. Basic Psychology 101. Her insults though, went overboard.