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My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out - Romance - Nairaland

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My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by ritylove(f): 10:07pm On Aug 07
I am a very gregarious or rather should i say a social individual,i keep alot of company but my actual real friends circle is pretty small,i actually never bought this male bestie of a thing from the onset because i felt it was thrash and irrelevant to me, i was satisfied with my girlfriends around,but during my 100 level in the university there was this particular guy i met then i was still a fresher i never knew much about the school he helped me alot with my clearance,getting a place to stay,showing me around school with alot of stuffs too numerous to mention here.

As time goes on suprisingly we started getting very close much more closer than i ever expected he was very nice and caring to me,sometimes he acts like my dad he is the only male friend i have who dares scold me in my wrong doings as time goes on before i could even realize it he was the closest to me among all my friends he was always there for me when i needed someone even when i dont he was there. We became so close i started confiding in him alot,i even told him stuffs i cant tell my mum we got so close he knows almost everything about me,everyone av dated,whom am dating,my breakups,my sex life,my kind of guy,my attitude towards dating,how i reason, even before saying something he has an idea of what am about to say,this guy knows my girlcode to the freaking core there is hardly anything i can hide from him,he has being of great assistance to me always forcing me to read my books and forget social medias,the truth is that he is the major reason for my drastic improvement academically, i was always at the receiving end,there is hardly anything i do for him yet he stayed i realized i needed him more than he needed me.


it all started few days ago as usual we just left from an eatery store heading back home he decided to drop by my place to charge his pc which he was using for his finals project work since there area had light issues,fast forward to when we got home there it goes we were talking as usual then all of a sudden he started saying stuffs how he feels about me all this while but only kept it to himself after hearing him speak for almost 3hours i was totally confused i didnt say anything i just starred at him the whole time till he finished ,noticing my silience he then asked me what i had to say about what i just heared,i had no idea on what to say i was totally confused i have never seen him this serious my entire life,in an attempt to escape the moment and look on his face i told him to give me sometime to dissolve all what i have heard after which he left.

Now am put in one of the most difficult situations i have ever being he is a very nice person,one of the nicest guys i have met yet he treats me better than anyone else, he treats me better than anyone am dating words can hardly explain i like him alot but i dont think i love or have any feelings or so for him this a guy who waited almost 4yrs to ask me out,a guy who knows me better than all my friends,i feel this guy knows too much and am scared he might use that against me one way or the other after all he has done for me i feel i owe him more, i cant look him in the eyes and tell him that i dont love him,i dont want to hurt his feelings and i dont want to loose him either cux he is my bestfriend i dont want to look like the bad person in front of everyone else but pleasing him here means displeasing myself i dont know what to do anymore cux i dont want to hurt anyones feeling, have being avoiding his calls and text cux i dont know what to say please i need a sincere and modest advice here what can i do in this situation i dont want anyones feelings getting hurt.

38 Likes 4 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by Chascop: 10:20pm On Aug 07
Having a Female as a Best friend is like having Chicken for a pet, You will eat it some day- Pete Edochie.

Dear OP, he's not a bestie but a long time admirer who's set to unleash his desires and make it official

469 Likes 30 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by Nnaabros: 10:20pm On Aug 07
You don't love him with all his nice qualities and the way he treats you but you love all those other guys who treat you far less than he does. ?

What do you women really want?

Is love all about romantic feelings and emotions, rather than qualities and personality?

Most people never appreciate what they have until they lose it.

I still blame the guy for not laying his cards clearly on the table from the beginning, instead of acting BROTHER and FATHER to a girl for four years before telling her what he really wants.

775 Likes 66 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by IamPlato(m): 10:21pm On Aug 07
...


Can You Please Shut Up With The "Nice Guy" shiit?


If I Love A Girl, I Can Never Make Her A Close Friend I Will be Advicing like I'm Her Father. Am I Mad?


The Guy Made A Big Mistake because When It Comes To Ladies this Is How It Ends When You Make Yourself a Brother And Father bullshiit...


Too Much Of Everything Is Bad. He Has Given His All To You. You Don See Am Finish... No Mystery About Him, he Has Been The Nicest fvck up Nigga...


Dont Waste His Time, tell Him You Dont Love and Dont Forget To Add "I See You As My Elder Brother". He Can Go And Kill Himself If thats The Solution

336 Likes 24 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by oladikenie(m): 10:21pm On Aug 07
pray about it

18 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by lilmax(m): 10:27pm On Aug 07
from what I gathered from this crap

he's not very intelligent, during my days of this bestie thing, I used girls like tissue,they are so vurnerable.... but I don change grin



well now we know why girls are being treated like trash.....

49 Likes 4 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by Sheuns(m): 10:35pm On Aug 07
This has happened to most guys. It's the truth. That's why it's advisable to never ask a lady for friendship first if you wish to have a romantic relationship later on. Just tell her from the onset so she knows where you're driving at. Not forming one nice and caring friend poo.

87 Likes 3 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by Heartbender: 10:39pm On Aug 07
Don't date him. How can he wait for 4 years (a full political tenure) to tell you his feelings. Baba can plot your skull mining and you will escort him to the babalawo innocently




In other news, date me. I like woman, I dey straightforward. grin

265 Likes 14 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by 1stNumeroUno: 10:41pm On Aug 07
OMG!

This epistle because somebody ask you out?

Just say YES or NO my dear... something more serious is boiling out there - NASS is under siege!

200 Likes 10 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by xpac01(m): 10:48pm On Aug 07
ritylove:
i like him alot but i dont think i love or have any feelings, i cant look him in the eyes and tell him that i dont love him,

Wrong.

From the tone of your message I can easily decipher that you actually love (having strong affection for) the guy, just that you don't have any romantic feelings towards him. This is actually natural just that some nice guys never still get this.

Please don't just look him in the eyes and spill those I don't love you words to him. It will break him badly. He must be a nice guy who simply thought that by the what the boh of you have been together you'll simply say yes to his proposals.

Try explaining your own feelings to him.
Ask him what exactly he wants. And tell him how difficult it is for the both of you to go across the other side of the river in your relationship with him. Tell him calmly, with love and with all sincerity. Don't even try telling him you're thinking about it. Be firm, gentle and definite with your response. IT IS NOT JUST GOING TO WORK.

I have actually been in your shoes as a guy.


He will understand I am sure.

136 Likes 13 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by samysmoothfresh: 10:57pm On Aug 07
"............after hearing him speak for almost 3hours........"


babe that guy must really love you o..........................3 hours?..........................seriously?
........what did he say in particular that lasted almost 3hours?



"................he's the nicest guy i've ever met........"



this is why some ladies will forever remain dumb, heartbroken, frustrated and single
God has given you "the nicest guy you've ever met", instead of you to grab him now, you dey ask stupid question


later when you meet a yoruba demon, you'll (and your fellow women) start screaming and wailing "men are scum"



"...............this is a guy that waited 4yrs to ask me out......"


aunty, he is not a "guy" cos no real guy will wait 4yrs to ask a lady out


he,(your bestie) is simply a pùssy



".........he knows too much & might use it against me one way or......."



hahahahaha...........SMH



& lastly, this is a nice script / story.


where did you get it from?

160 Likes 8 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by samysmoothfresh: 11:06pm On Aug 07
the reason you dont wanna accept his proposal is:


you dont love him that way or you're scared he might pull a "kreativegénius - pocohantas" stunt on you since he knows too much?


which is it?

7 Likes

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by Homeboiy: 11:07pm On Aug 07
Foolish girl, He was even talking for 3 hrs without your response .

I don't blame you, I blame the useless guy that's forming Mr nice guy
Girls like you should be used for yahoo rituals

Ewu Cotonou

onye iberibe

79 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by ritylove(f): 11:21pm On Aug 07
Nnaabros:
You don't love him with all his nice qualities and the way he treats you but you love all those other guys who treat you far less than he does. ?

What do you women really want?

Is love all about romantic feelings and emotions, rather than qualities and personality?

Most people never appreciate what they have until they lose it.

I still blame the guy for not laying his cards clearly on the table from the beginning, instead of acting BROTHER and FATHER to a girl for four years before telling her what you really want.
the only thing i feel here is pity i feel he wasted his time and resources on me but still i dont want loose a good friend

6 Likes

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by Mrtitanic(m): 11:47pm On Aug 07
date me instead am a nice guy too no jokes

3 Likes

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by chicoMX(m): 11:50pm On Aug 07
After my first experience, I knew I had to up my game.
I see a good andcaring guy, who is not romantic grin Ritylove

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by MajorJeffery: 11:53pm On Aug 07
The young man is gradually crawling out of the prison you kept him for long now, more balls to his dickson. cheesy

20 Likes 3 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by eph12(m): 11:56pm On Aug 07
The poor guy probably hasn't been able to date others because you have occupied all the space. He is the victim here. Release him abeg so he can focus on better girls elsewhere.

189 Likes 11 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by correctguy101(m): 11:57pm On Aug 07
IamPlato:
...


Can You Please Shut Up With The "Nice Guy" shiit?


If I Love A Girl, I Can Never Make Her A Close Friend I Will be Advicing like I'm Her Father. Am I Mad?


The Guy Made A Big Mistake because When It Comes To Ladies this Is How It Ends When You Make Yourself a Brother And Father bullshiit...


Too Much Of Everything Is Bad. He Has Given His All To You. You Don See Am Finish... No Mystery About Him, he Has Been The Nicest fvck up Nigga...


Dont Waste His Time, tell Him You Dont Love and Dont Forget To Add "I See You As My Elder Brother". He Can Go And Kill Himself If thats The Solution

You too dey vex, you this Plato...

Oya goan sleep.. angry

6 Likes

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by Draei: 12:02am On Aug 08
Seems this one is mentally unstable. A guy with all the good qualities you mentioned isn't good enough for you to date?

But you rather prefer wasting your time with another niggur that ain't even half as caring as he is?

Total bullshiit, some girls need their brains to be examined one after the other. It's pointless saying more to the Op.

58 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by correctguy101(m): 12:03am On Aug 08
chicoMX:


After my first experience, I knew I had to up my game.

I see a good andcaring guy, who is not romantic grin Ritylove

I don't know or understand how the guy did it but I can never blame him.

The guy's too good and I can never envy him. Wetin I wan use all that much goodness do? To the extent of keeping fresh fish as pet? Ayam not undastand

15 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by Earthbound(m): 12:03am On Aug 08
I don't know which is more stupid. Waiting four years to tell a girl you like her or spending three hours professing your love without action.


Ritylove, you can learn to love him. You trust him already so it should be easy. Give it a try. It just might be the best decision you ever made.

58 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by ritylove(f): 12:19am On Aug 08
IamPlato:
...


Can You Please Shut Up With The "Nice Guy" shiit?


If I Love A Girl, I Can Never Make Her A Close Friend I Will be Advicing like I'm Her Father. Am I Mad?


The Guy Made A Big Mistake because When It Comes To Ladies this Is How It Ends When You Make Yourself a Brother And Father bullshiit...


Too Much Of Everything Is Bad. He Has Given His All To You. You Don See Am Finish... No Mystery About Him, he Has Been The Nicest fvck up Nigga...


Dont Waste His Time, tell Him You Dont Love and Dont Forget To Add "I See You As My Elder Brother". He Can Go And Kill Himself If thats The Solution
i wish it was as easy as you said it then i wont be sharing it here

1 Like

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by chicoMX(m): 12:20am On Aug 08
correctguy101:


I don't know or understand how the guy did it but I can never blame him.

The guy's too good and I can never envy him. Wetin I wan use all that much goodness do? To the extent of keeping fresh fish as pet? Ayam not undastand

Very true, I just can't blame him. I think the Op is dating someone already.

4 Likes

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by ritylove(f): 12:40am On Aug 08
xpac01:


Wrong.

From the tone of your message I can easily decipher that you actually love (having strong affection for) the guy, just that you don't have any romantic feelings towards him. This is actually natural just that some nice guys never still get this.

Please don't just look him in the eyes and spill those I don't love you words to him. It will break him badly. He must be a nice guy who simply thought that by the what the boh of you have been together you'll simply say yes to his proposals.

Try explaining your own feelings to him.
Ask him what exactly he wants. And tell him how difficult it is for the both of you to go across the other side of the river in your relationship with him. Tell him calmly, with love and with all sincerity. Don't even try telling him you're thinking about it. Be firm, gentle and definite with your response. IT IS NOT JUST GOING TO WORK.

I have actually been in your shoes as a guy.


He will understand I am sure.
i feel so guilty after hearing everyword he said
Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by Melison(m): 1:08am On Aug 08
There are ways things are done, u don't just barge into him and tell him u don't love him, if u are already in a relationship it's good for u, use it as an excuse innno but if u are single wahala dey o cos u don't have much reasons to support ur course but in all if he wants u happy I think he will understand but how u approach him matters a lot,its not easy fa! 4years?? That means since jona tenure he really tried but if u can't date him take things slow and tell him, I pray u make the best decision dear.

6 Likes

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by Thermodynamics(m): 1:31am On Aug 08
Rita, first of all, I just check your profile pic. You be fine girl.

Back to the topic, that guy obviously worships you. Waiting for 4years and pouring out his feeling for 3hours, the guy must be an introvert.

Why you nor wan say yes na?

Abi the guy nor fine?

I believe that if you say yes, you won't regret it, believe me, he probably has marriage plans for you. You might not like him now but you will like him later, and contrary to what you might think, dating your best friend is one of the best things that can happen to you.

Nor allow the guy F.uc.k you ooh, I would never encourage fornication.

67 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by Next2Bezee(m): 2:15am On Aug 08
To summarize: a guy who you see as nothing more than an invaluable friend is asking you out, but you have zero feelings for him, except friendship.

Advice: Man up, or rather woman up, and tell him the truth. If he's really your best friend, he can stay despite not dating you. if not, he will leave. However, be sure that you aren't playing down how much he means to you. If you can't handle life without him or don't know any other guys out there better than him, you will lose a great guy forever.

My advice is to you is that if you really consider him unique, give him a chance and see if you'll fall for him. Only reject him or keep him waiting if you know that you can handle life without him.

Goodluck.

11 Likes

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by n0fav0rs: 5:26am On Aug 08

106 Likes 7 Shares

Re: My Bestie Is Now Asking Me Out by oluwatodimu1(m): 5:28am On Aug 08
@Rita, there is a huge difference btw liking someone and luving that person. what i dont understand is that are u scared of your secrets he knws (obviously not, i suppose) or he's nt loveable by your standard?
True, d guy was dumb (why would i wait 4yrs) even as an introvert, i study & ask her out all in weeks.
Guys, this a lesson for all 'caretaker bf'

12 Likes 1 Share

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