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If Resumes Told The Truth. - Jokes Etc - Nairaland

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Guess What Mbaka Told The Jounalist About Buhari Nd Biafra As He Was Parking Out / Funny: When You Are Told Burutai Is Passing Through Your Street / Which Of These Two Is Telling The Truth? (photo) (2) (3) (4)

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If Resumes Told The Truth. by femionasan(m): 2:24pm On Mar 30, 2007
OBJECTIVE
To sit in a cubicle and stare at a monitor for eight hours, occasionally looking attentive when approached by a superior.

EDUCATION
School: Very Expensive
Major: Not Important
GPA: Don't Ask

EMPLOYMENT
Network Management (9/'96-Present)
Produced daily itinerary of television programs to watch. Duties included changing channels, avoiding infomercials, and staying tuned after those messages.
Debt Consolidation (4/97-12/99)
Using various tools such as credit cards and borrowed cash, I managed to combine groups of unpaid bills into one monthly bill that goes straight to my father.
Resident Inhaler (9/98-6/99)
Assisted all students with chemical intake, from purchasing to exhaling.

COMPUTER SKILLS
*Solitaire *Minesweeper *On/Off Repair Method

HONORS AND AWARDS
*First Place in "Miller Lite Funnel Tournament"
*Said Toast at brother's wedding
*High Score on Theta Chi's Pinball Machine

For further references, contact my mother. For positive responses, please pose all questions as though you're considering me as a law school applicant.

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Stupid Car Owner / Curiosity / Three Brothers.

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