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How To Write Perfect Product Review Articles : By Amechi Okoli / The Dog Attendant (T. D. A) [COUNTLESS Part 2]. A story By Darousmart Emmanuel. / Countless (a story of Sex, Betrayal and vengeance) by Darousmart Emmanuel. (2) (3) (4)
|Emmanuel Okoli by flow1759: 10:00pm On Sep 17, 2018|
This is the same flow1759 you all know coming with another rib cracker titled EMMANUEL OKOLI.
Read and Enjoy
No part of this book should be copied, republished, televised without the writer's consent. Thank you.
You can reach the writer on email@example.com, +2348032607611
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Make all of una show face, this one go totori una.
Still i Flow
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by flow1759: 10:05pm On Sep 17, 2018|
“I miss home, I miss my mum, I pray papa comes back to life, even though him come back, I know say I no go fit go back to school go start again, water don already pass garri, that is why i dey drink Garri now”
JUNE 23, 2014
“Flow how far na? where you dey since morning! I don dey here dey wait una sotey s’hit don dey comot for my n’yash” I wasn’t happy Flo and the others came behind schedule, “S’hit wey I suppose s’hit for OK republic with Okoli for my hand”
Okoli is my surname……Emmanuel Okoli is my name, I am from Dunukofia in Anambra state. If there is one vegetable I love so much, that vegetable is Okoli. I love Okoli so much, not because it spells my surname, I love Okoli so much not because if smells great, I love Okoli so much because my friends love it. Yes my friends Flow, Snow and Man love it so so much. In fact they love it mucher than me. Yes “mucher”, you heard me right, mucher.
“Emma this your Okoli is mucher than my own ooh!” Man was puffing from a large Jumbo yet he complained.
I was wondering when the English language would be fair to weed smoker and allow us invent our words and these words should take pride of place in the English dictionary, just when. Lost in my thought with Okoli on my hands.
“Snow you be big olodo oh! Moon nahim big pass Sun!” was another argument.
“Flow you be Mumu ooh! How you go talk say Moon big pass Sun?” I was confused, my thinking faculty was flying with the flames the Okoli in my hand produced.
The argument continued as the Sun shone so bright on the shinning bald head of Man.
“But Man wetin you think for this matter sef?” I inquired
“Me? Think?” He gave that look like the other day…….
…….The other day when he was asked “Man, who colonize Africa?” and his answer was that Africa was colonized by Nigeria.
“Yes na you, wetin you think for the matter? Sun big pass Moon abi Moon big pass Sun?” I was anxious of his response.
“Answer na! What do you think? Abi you don forget your brain for house like the other day?” Snow was running out of patience.
Our dear Man gave us a look like yet the other day………..
………The other day when everyone else except him was involved in the old secondary school debate “Teacher and Doctor who better pass?”, his legendary contribution to the argument was “when I reach house I go find out from my brain”
“chmmmm!” Man coughed, “For Sun and Moon, none of them big pass, my head big pass the two of them, if my cousin Naeto wan draw Moon or Sun for assignment wey dem give am, I dey tell am make him use my head do the sketch”
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by Alexgeneration(m): 10:37pm On Sep 17, 2018|
FLOW is back ooooooo
Another thriller is loading.
Guy, where you run go hide na, abeg no run again, just dey give us better tori.
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by flow1759: 10:46pm On Sep 17, 2018|
I dey since na, I no hide. I just go underground.
Pls it should be noted by all that Names, Places and organizations mentioned in this story is a fiction of the writer's imagination inasmuch as the story is real as told. Thank you
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by Alexgeneration(m): 11:03pm On Sep 17, 2018|
flow1759:No shaking Bro, just continue to dey drop the dope lines.
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by ChemicalReaction(f): 12:12am On Sep 18, 2018|
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by skubido(m): 11:06am On Sep 18, 2018|
flow flow,, nice wan bro, nothing do u
abeg mo dey flow dey go oooo
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by skubido(m): 11:06am On Sep 18, 2018|
chai e don tay oooo
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by daremiarchs(m): 3:11pm On Sep 18, 2018|
Together we shall flow bro
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by Tgold1(m): 3:13pm On Sep 18, 2018|
Flow my nigga.... Still you flow, still I follow
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by johnwizey: 3:19pm On Sep 18, 2018|
Man wey dey reason
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by flow1759: 10:45pm On Sep 18, 2018|
I will try to update regularly. This story defines longivity
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by Samsimple(m): 1:54am On Sep 19, 2018|
flow don come oohhh.. na me b man, man wey dey reason.. welcome back bro.. I must follow this one to d end oohh... or so i thought..
still I follow
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by Samsimple(m): 1:55am On Sep 19, 2018|
make I cool spirit with one bottle of 1759
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by Nobody: 7:39am On Sep 19, 2018|
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by diaryOfpersius(m): 4:22am On Sep 20, 2018|
Flow Is back......... Ride on brother.......
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by flow1759: 1:10pm On Sep 20, 2018|
While I smoked weed at OK republic, my stomach rumbled.
“Beans at work!” I said to myself.
Just then, I remembered my last experience with beans……..
Flow and Snow had gone job hunting, so I told myself “why not try your hands on beans” a bad spirit told me.
“Okay!” I answered the bad spirit
Beans was on fire for One hour thirty minutes yet the water in the pot was rising higher.
“na water beans be this?” I cried.
“wetin I go do to this beans na” I lamented, “and I dey really hungry!!”
“I know what to do” I reached a decision “I go bring am down leave am make e cold, if e cold the water go dry”
I left the kitchen to go have a haircut and on returning; I cried. The water increased. The pot was flooded.
I was really hungry, plus, I bought the beans with my last card.
Nobody wey go say him mama food no sweet, therefore I continued eating my
“water beans” little did I know.…………………………………
“hmmmm! I say who farting here!” Man was furious and mad.
“You dey mad ooh, you mess, you com say who farting” Flow cursed.
I knew the odour Man’s fart produces, I was sure it wasn’t his fart. Or could it have been my own fart unknown to me? You know sometimes my farts are accidental discharge. Or so I thought.
But on a second thought my fart never stench like dead goat of four days, not mine.
“You say na me mess!” Man stood up with fury.
Soon our dear Man punched Flow on his jaw. Flow was on the ground in no time, eyes closed, body steady.
“Man! You don kill Flow my brother” Snow was on Man’s neck.
The atmosphere was lousy, something in me told me to flee, I was losing grip of the Okoli I held, I saw Flow’s face pale.
“Oya wake am!!!” Snow yelled, “You must wake my brother ooh!!”
All I saw was death written in Uppercase all around flow.
“My man Flow, so naso you go” I spoke deep down, “One blow, you shift! Flow! Flow anah!”
“I go kill you oh!” Snow was about killing Man.
“Sorry na! I no mean to kill am, him say na me mess nahim make” Man cried.
“Eheen! No be you mess?” Snow yelled, “ehhhnnn! Answer me na! No be you mess?”
“Na me oooh!” Man confessed.
“So na you mess and you don go kill person wey dey accuse you!” I managed to talk.
“And today na him birthday!” Snow cried, “Today na Flow birthday”
Awww! I instantly remembered that Flow had informed us that morning that it was his birthday.
“So he died on his birthday!” Tears crawled down my eyes
“Wetin sef, if today na him birthday nkor? make I no mess again? Messing is a freedom of speech!!” Man expressed.
“Messing is a freedom of speech!” It resounded in my head.
Just then, I knew that I was about losing another friend or two.
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by flow1759: 6:10pm On Sep 20, 2018|
Yeah I am. I miss you guys.
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by flow1759: 6:17pm On Sep 20, 2018|
Thank you, I love you guys
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by flow1759: 9:19pm On Sep 20, 2018|
JUNE 24, 2014, Morning.
“Baby you used to be my cup of tea, but now I drink Vodka” Flow said to Diva his girlfriend.
“But baby I still love you! I love you so much!” Diva held his hand.
From where I stood watching from the corner of the window I could see that Flow was about kissing her.
Lips were magnetizing gradually, until all of a sudden, Flow spat on Diva.
Oh my God!
“You disgusting me!!” Flow pushed her away.
“What? you spit on me?” Diva was shocked.
“And I will p’oo on you if you don’t leave my house this moment”
“But Flow why na? Why you pour spit for this fine girl Diva na?” I almost spoke out.
Diva moved close to the door and pursed, arms outstretched, and said “Happy belated birthday Flow!”
“Me be late? Na your papa be late” That was unromantic of Flow.
Hitting the wrapped gift of her hand, Flow said; “To hell with your gift, I don’t accept gift from strangers”
“So I am now a stranger to you!” I saw a Diva’s tears.
Flow bang the door signifying the end of his relationship with Diva, her gift was thrown to her, I hid myself very well, praying fervently; my prayer was not for Diva to see me as she walked out, but for her not to go pick up the gift Flow threw behind her.
“e fit be money ooh!” I said to myself.
As Diva left the premises, I quickly rushed to the gift on the floor and rush back to my hiding place.
Then the unwrapping began. I unwrapped the first box, it contained another box.
Unwrapping the second pink box, yet it contained a yellow box.
“Wetin go dey inside this box sef? abi na wedding ring?” I thought, “abi this girl wan engage Flow?”
“Flow you get luck oh, na woman dey engage you no be you dey engage woman” I thought aloud.
Opening then third box, I met an envelop.
“Abi na letter bomb?”
As I opened the envelop, I met a neatly folded paper, opening the paper the first text my eyes caught a glimpse of was; “UPANA HOSPITAL PORT HARCOURT”
Next was “Pregnnancy test result!” written boldly.
“god of Abagana! So Flow don give this girl belle?”
“Hahahahahaha!” I laughed out loud.
“Who dey laugh there?” I heard Flow from inside.
“Mumu boy, come read your letter here ooh!”
1 Like 1 Share
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by skubido(m): 1:06pm On Sep 21, 2018|
tanks a lot for the update
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by yungrashee(m): 1:18pm On Sep 21, 2018|
flow baba is back... still we flow!!!
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by flow1759: 1:57pm On Sep 21, 2018|
yungrashee:Yeah still we flow
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by Tgold1(m): 6:58pm On Sep 21, 2018|
Flow1759 u won't seize to amaze me...
Still you flow, still I follow
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by flow1759: 9:51pm On Sep 21, 2018|
SEPTEMBER 24, 2014, 6pm
“Flow I thank God for your life ooh” We were at St. Peter Basilica that evening. 404 on the table, Palm wine in the Ololo on the floor.
“thank God for my life for wetin?”
“That girl Diva almost kill you for lie-lie pregnancy ooh hahahaha!” Man laughed.
“I swear!” I took a sip of the palmwine in front of me.
“Hahhahaha!” We all laughed.
“Oboy the pammy don finish ooh!” Snow noticed, “make we buy another Ololo na”
“Make e finish na, the pammy dey kuku taste salt-salt” Flow noticed.
“Mfon! Mfon!” I called.
As I asked Mfon about the taste of her pammy I stared at her heavy-duty a-rss, mouth ajar, and saliva dripping.
“Mfon why your pammy dey taste salt-salt?” I asked, “abi you put am salt?”
Sounded like: “Mfon why your nyash dey big like this, abi you put am fertilizer?”
“Mbok I no put am salt oh” I was so high that I was seeing another face Mfon carried on her lower frame. A smiling face, so I smiled back.
“Why you dey rook my nyash na, mbok” Mfon noticed
“Me? look your nyash? I dey look Television oh” I lied.
“Make we no take another pammy again, I get one idea” Man’s suggestion
That was a suggestion that made me swam in the gutter later that night.
“wetin be the suggestion?” I asked.
“Emma you know that Hausa estate wey dey for back of Chukwu street?” Man asked me.
“Hausa estate?” I was lost, “which Hausa estate?”
“That Hausa estate wey them build with zinc na!” Man continued, “that batcha”
“I no know am ooh”
“Okay e get one BKT joint wey dey there” Man said, “make we go there go drink BKT”
“wetin be BKT?” Snow asked.
“BKT means Books Kill Teacher” Flow answered and laughed.
“Flow why you dey laugh am na?” Man said, “No mind am BKT mean Burukutu”
“Na one drink wey be like Pammy” I added, “them dey drink am for North, na Hausa people drink”
“But if we drink the Burukutu after we don drink pammy, e no go make sense na, e go be mix-co-gboo be that” Snow was so Naïve.
On hearing the Ibo word mix-co-gboo, I recalled way back when it was just I and Snow staying the house-before Flow came, I remember steadying my head inside our toilet hole all night long because I and Snow drank a mixture of vodka with stout in large quantity.
Snow had told me the next morning that my experience was mild compared to his, that he burnt half of the hairs on his head with fire-lighter in other for him to look like Bob Marley. That was cazy!
The craziest was that he p’ooed in our cooking pot and cooked it with seasoning.
The next morning while dishing out the yam porridge I saw in the pot, I asked, “who cook this yam porridge? e sweet ooh”
“oooh my God!” I ate sweet potatoes porridge.
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by flow1759: 9:52pm On Sep 21, 2018|
Then this next update will amaze you more.
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by HisSexcellency(m): 11:29pm On Sep 21, 2018|
Check out my signature
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by Nobody: 7:16am On Sep 22, 2018|
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by skubido(m): 8:24pm On Sep 22, 2018|
tanks a lot for the update
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by Kirgyakos(m): 10:30pm On Sep 24, 2018|
finally! after several decades in exile, the literary genius reappears on the Republic of Nairaland ...!
welkom baq "king flow"
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by Kirgyakos(m): 10:38pm On Sep 24, 2018|
Flow and TheBlessdMan "the Messi & Ronaldo of literature section on NL"
These two guys are awesome....so funny to the core
God bless you guys 4 the joy u give to me
|Re: Emmanuel Okoli by Nobody: 12:44am On Sep 25, 2018|
See as you look like mopping stick
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