A guy took me out 2 weeks ago, wen we got to the bar, he was jst forming.
Bar man get me a Malt, could you believe that the stupid guy does not even have tony to pay for the drink and i was requesting for chicken it. It was a hell 4 me that day,

^^
serves u rite u be long throat
if they say give 190 a chance 2 show u the world
u wont agree
continue following those SS2 bois

I dated a local orange seller. her speciallity was to curse people,s mother

papa190:

^^
serves u rite u be long throat
if they say give 190 a chance 2 show u the world
u wont agree
continue following those SS2 bois

LWKMD why dem barn you na?

Mr Anus:

I dated a local orange seller. her speciallity was to curse people,s mother

Mr Anus~
I pity your life
your comment has left me complete drained with no strength to even type
Buahahahaha, im still laffin~
Om-Gosh, Help me, help me, Laff wan kill me die for here~

Woke4all:

LWKMD why dem barn you na?

them ban me cos i talk say Iice too dey fork~

^^
Na wa ooo. What about ur papa-gee? Dem ban am too?

Men I still cant stop laughing especially when I remember the post of the chic that said she doesnt drink pizza. But bros u wicked sha, why u no go carry the babe go betta Mamaput - at least she would not tell you that she doesn't "drink" amala

woud u belive this orange seller, when somebody looks at her, she curse their motther: when somebody bumps into her, she curse their great great gran father: when somebody says hi, she curses not only the persons great gran father, but their great great gran mother & maybe their unborn kids, What the Bleep!!!!
Lesson learnt- look b4 u leap, do not think wit your c0rk!!

^^
Death
and she sells orange too
cheii u nor Just get level @ all~

Hehehehe. . . I am cracking here peeps

once this guy took me out to alton towers
the whole way there he kept fronting about how he'll hold my hand if i was too scared on the rides. When we got on oblivion he held my hand so tight my fingers turned blue, when we got off he puked on me and as if that wasnt enough he fainted

i called emergency and fastwalked, had to pay £300 for my cab ride back home sitting for 3 hours in some mamas boy vomit

I dated my good looks

Analissa:

once this guy took me out to alton towers
the whole way there he kept fronting about how he'll hold my hand if i was too scared on the rides. When we got on oblivion he held my hand so tight my fingers turned blue, when we got off he puked on me and as if that wasnt enough he fainted

i called emergency and fastwalked, had to pay £300 for my cab ride back home sitting for 3 hours in some mamas boy vomit

so hows the guy now!

I met this really cute mixed race guy a while ago while me and 2 of my friends were at the train station. We were heading towards Luton.
He was standing with one of his friends, im guessing they are brothers tho cuz they looked too alike. He walked up to me and my friends and the first thing he said was ''Hey cutie'' . Erm of course i felt embarrased cuz my friends were watching me,so i just said hi and looked away. He came closer and we began chatting ( it got too long cuz the train wouldnt just show up. He was heading to Luton too) Eventually we exchanged numbers and we got talking on the phone for about a week.

Next weekend we went to the cinema, and first thing first, he wanted to see a movie,but he didnt have money,so after he asked for 2 tickets,he stared at me to pay.I wanted to die,but anyway i paid for the two. He even asked if he could get popcorn and i was like hell no! After the movie was over, he asked if he could come over to my house and i said hell no, and i walked out of the cinema. He ran after me begging and i told him to F off. He looked like a gold digger.

papa190:

so hows the guy now!

I didnt pick up his calls after that couldnt stop seeing the puke   when i saw him about a year after baby boy said it must have been something he ate and wanted another chance but in my opinion fool me once,

^^ funny way of showing it, gifting me with his already digested dinner. I'll take hate any day

^^i mite have laughed it off if he hadnt puked. i swear my ferragamos haven't been the same since

I've had bad dates wit nigeria men o. they usually front about the millions they've got in the bank but they sent their cars to the garage and thats why they're taking the train or they tell me how they want me to be like their mothers (cook + clean) and want to marry me after 2 dates. I pick up my stilettos and run.

Met this guy on fbk, he expressed his likeness 4 me, later he asked for my bb pin wich I obliged him nd he started frm compliment my everyday pic to inviting me out tho I played hard to get for somtime until on a day dat I was jst bored @ home nd needed to jst go somwhere so I decided to chat dis guy up he just asked if I would like to see a movie, I quickly jumped @ d offer nd I quickly changed into 1 of my best clothes nd headed for d venue on getting outside d place I brought out my fone to call him to inform him of my presence nd he told me he has spotted me that I should come in. Me been me I went in wit all d airs nd when finally I can spot dis dude I almost went into a coma. This guy was a bouncer in d cinema nd he was wearing d worst pair of shoes av eva seen on my bf. I managed to exchange pleasantries with him nd immediately he told me he got my movie ticket already, (I felt cornered) nd he was acting like everytin is ok. Maybe if he wasn't looking so pumped up I might have been tempted to to wipe d silly smirk off his handsome face. Then he proceeded to walk me to where I will watch d movie, I noticed pple were staring @ us so I had to put a frown on my face to make it look like I was been escorted by my bodyguard nd d idiot was just chatting away nd even touching my back. As he was seeing me off after d movie, I bumped into a guy dat I knew in d past, I wished d ground will jst open up hide me, wat I did was to jst pretend I didn't notice him nd thank God he was on fone @ d time so he couldn't call me but thinking back on it now I guess it was the bouncer's look that intimidated him. From the time I left that cinema till this very moment I'm writing this I avnt replied any of d guy's ping nor answer his calls. Even scared nw of going to that same cinema again wit my bf

MRbrownJAY: @post
met this gal in London and invited her back to my crib after a few good dates. when we got there we had some fancy dinner, movie and then onward to getting freaky. during pre-intimacy, i started fingering her and i could feel something inside her cootie cat. i asked her if she had a diaphragm or som' but she said: "come on stop joking!" so i replied:" yeah i can feel something strange inside your punana, there is something in there". she said: "nah come on!"

anyway we start sha*gging and i could still feel something inside her. so i told her to spread her leg and i started fingering her again trying to get to what i was feeling inside. i started aiming for that thing i was touching. it felt like something solid but it wasnt flesh. after a while, i got hold of it and dragged it out, IT WAS A TAMPON THAT SHE HAD FORGOTTEN INSIDE.

the craziest part was that she didnt know how long its been inside her but by the nasty sickening smell of it (which filled the room in a sec) it must have been there for AGES! the poor gal was so ashamed that she ran to the bathroom screaming, got dressed and wanted to go home. she didnt say a single word in the car.

the sad part is that: forgetting a tampon inside is supposedly common with women and that it can lead to cancer etc
but that SMELL will haunt me forever as i sometimes remember that foul odor!!

Lolz... dnt be haunted, it vry common to 4get a tampon, u shd hv made her relax wen u got it out... freakin out visibly was dead wrong, ur kid sis can make same mistake dats if sm guy dsnt go there daily to finger it out lyk u did... u f.uckd up jor!

MRbrownJAY: @post
met this gal in London and invited her back to my crib after a few good dates. when we got there we had some fancy dinner, movie and then onward to getting freaky. during pre-intimacy, i started fingering her and i could feel something inside her cootie cat. i asked her if she had a diaphragm or som' but she said: "come on stop joking!" so i replied:" yeah i can feel something strange inside your punana, there is something in there". she said: "nah come on!"

anyway we start sha*gging and i could still feel something inside her. so i told her to spread her leg and i started fingering her again trying to get to what i was feeling inside. i started aiming for that thing i was touching. it felt like something solid but it wasnt flesh. after a while, i got hold of it and dragged it out, IT WAS A TAMPON THAT SHE HAD FORGOTTEN INSIDE.

the craziest part was that she didnt know how long its been inside her but by the nasty sickening smell of it (which filled the room in a sec) it must have been there for AGES! the poor gal was so ashamed that she ran to the bathroom screaming, got dressed and wanted to go home. she didnt say a single word in the car.

the sad part is that: forgetting a tampon inside is supposedly common with women and that it can lead to cancer etc
but that SMELL will haunt me forever as i sometimes remember that foul odor!!

lmao @MRbrownJAY, i see nothing has changed.

Took a girl i was trying to get down with to a fancy restaurant cos she claimed she was hungry. on getting there, she started ordering everything in sight. i had no problem with that so long as she could eat everything she ordered cos i love women with a healthy appetite and told her as much. 30mins down the line, she asked that i join her as she was filled already. i excused myself on the pretense of going to the loo and drove home leaving her there to pay d bills. nothing pisses me off like waste and pretense!

MRbrownJAY: @post
met this gal in London and invited her back to my crib after a few good dates. when we got there we had some fancy dinner, movie and then onward to getting freaky. during pre-intimacy, i started fingering her and i could feel something inside her cootie cat. i asked her if she had a diaphragm or som' but she said: "come on stop joking!" so i replied:" yeah i can feel something strange inside your punana, there is something in there". she said: "nah come on!"

anyway we start sha*gging and i could still feel something inside her. so i told her to spread her leg and i started fingering her again trying to get to what i was feeling inside. i started aiming for that thing i was touching. it felt like something solid but it wasnt flesh. after a while, i got hold of it and dragged it out, IT WAS A TAMPON THAT SHE HAD FORGOTTEN INSIDE.

the craziest part was that she didnt know how long its been inside her but by the nasty sickening smell of it (which filled the room in a sec) it must have been there for AGES! the poor gal was so ashamed that she ran to the bathroom screaming, got dressed and wanted to go home. she didnt say a single word in the car.

the sad part is that: forgetting a tampon inside is supposedly common with women and that it can lead to cancer etc
but that SMELL will haunt me forever as i sometimes remember that foul odor!!

lmao @MRbrownJAY, i see nothing has changed.

Took a girl i was trying to get down with to a fancy restaurant cos she claimed she was hungry. on getting there, she started ordering everything in sight. i had no problem with that so long as she could eat everything she ordered cos i love women with a healthy appetite and told her as much. 30mins down the line, she asked that i join her as she was filled already. i excused myself on the pretense of going to the loo and drove home leaving her there to pay d bills. nothing pisses me off like waste and pretense!

MRbrownJAY: @post
met this gal in London and invited her back to my crib after a few good dates. when we got there we had some fancy dinner, movie and then onward to getting freaky. during pre-intimacy, i started fingering her and i could feel something inside her cootie cat. i asked her if she had a diaphragm or som' but she said: "come on stop joking!" so i replied:" yeah i can feel something strange inside your punana, there is something in there". she said: "nah come on!"

anyway we start sha*gging and i could still feel something inside her. so i told her to spread her leg and i started fingering her again trying to get to what i was feeling inside. i started aiming for that thing i was touching. it felt like something solid but it wasnt flesh. after a while, i got hold of it and dragged it out, IT WAS A TAMPON THAT SHE HAD FORGOTTEN INSIDE.

the craziest part was that she didnt know how long its been inside her but by the nasty sickening smell of it (which filled the room in a sec) it must have been there for AGES! the poor gal was so ashamed that she ran to the bathroom screaming, got dressed and wanted to go home. she didnt say a single word in the car.

the sad part is that: forgetting a tampon inside is supposedly common with women and that it can lead to cancer etc
but that SMELL will haunt me forever as i sometimes remember that foul odor!!

lmao @MRbrownJAY, i see nothing has changed.

Took a girl i was trying to get down with to a fancy restaurant cos she claimed she was hungry. on getting there, she started ordering everything in sight. i had no problem with that so long as she could eat everything she ordered cos i love women with a healthy appetite and told her as much. 30mins down the line, she asked that i join her as she was filled already. i excused myself on the pretense of going to the loo and drove home leaving her there to pay d bills. nothing pisses me off like waste and pretense!