Good morning Married folks, I have a question for the married men.

If your mother complains that your wife have not called her in 4months
You confront your wife and she confirms in affirmative and her reason is that your mother have never called her or even "flash her" claiming that she only return call of those who care about her, she is even aware that your mother don't work and due to financial burden u have not sent money to your mother in months.
Meanwhile, you call her mother and elder brother (father figure) regularly without waiting for their calls.
In this case what would you do? Married women do you think she is right?

IamEmem:
Good morning Married folks, I have a question for the married men.

If your mother complains that your wife have not called her in 4months
You confront your wife and she confirms in affirmative and her reason is that your mother have never called her or even "flash her" claiming that she only return call of those who care about her, she is even aware that your mother don't work and due to financial burden u have not sent money to your mother in months.
Meanwhile, you call her mother and elder brother (father figure) regularly without waiting for their calls.
In this case what would you do? Married women do you think she is right?

Tell your wife to seek her mother's advise over her decision. Insist.

Thank me later.

IamEmem:
Good morning Married folks, I have a question for the married men.

If your mother complains that your wife have not called her in 4months
You confront your wife and she confirms in affirmative and her reason is that your mother have never called her or even "flash her" claiming that she only return call of those who care about her, she is even aware that your mother don't work and due to financial burden u have not sent money to your mother in months.
Meanwhile, you call her mother and elder brother (father figure) regularly without waiting for their calls.
In this case what would you do? Married women do you think she is right?

Call your own mother regularly and send her money too. You can't force good relationship between your mother and wife

She no try, you sef wey tell your wife your mother complain no try too. You for use idea tell your wife to call her.

Makes me remember my Father In Law...

We see in Church every Sunday.
Yet he will still be complaining to everyone that i dont call him during the week.

I had to ask him one day." Are you a girl "

Meanwhile nobody from my side dey disturb him daughter oooo.

Stop making excuses for your mother. If your wife was her daughter will she be calculating who called who? Same with your wife.

Abeg leave them. You can't force friendship. There is no point forcing what is not there to begin with.

The first question to ask is, is there an active friction/quarrel between them? If there is, you should make active move to placate the two of them. If not then your wife is in the wrong.

Think of it this way, if your mother didn't raise you and give you education you wouldn't be there for her to marry. After all your mother's investment, she came and 'took' you. The least she could do is at least to go the extra mile is communicating with her. It doesn't have to be a long conversation. Just general greeting is okay.

Also, how would you feel if (God forbid) your mother dies suddenly and you know she has not spoken with your feet in 4 months? How would you feel if tables were turned and your (wife's) son in-law does the same?

Don't get me wrong, I am not saying your child Should be subservient to your mother. Relationship cannot be forced but courtesy demands that she doesn't wait for your mother to call before contacting her.

You can’t force a relationship that probably wasn’t there from day 1 for them to suddenly become best friends. I am not excusing your wife for not calling your mother but that your wife calls her own mother regularly shouldn't equate that she should call your mother regularly too. In as much as some people expect a DIL and MIL to be close, it doesn't end up like that. I hope you call your mother regularly and take care of her.

IamEmem:
Good morning Married folks, I have a question for the married men.

If your mother complains that your wife have not called her in 4months
You confront your wife and she confirms in affirmative and her reason is that your mother have never called her or even "flash her" claiming that she only return call of those who care about her, she is even aware that your mother don't work and due to financial burden u have not sent money to your mother in months.
Meanwhile, you call her mother and elder brother (father figure) regularly without waiting for their calls.
In this case what would you do? Married women do you think she is right?

beat her ass(better punches).at times it's the only language these people understand.

family self.....tell your wife to call, apologize or you divorce her, simple

IamEmem:
Good morning Married folks, I have a question for the married men.

If your mother complains that your wife have not called her in 4months
You confront your wife and she confirms in affirmative and her reason is that your mother have never called her or even "flash her" claiming that she only return call of those who care about her, she is even aware that your mother don't work and due to financial burden u have not sent money to your mother in months.
Meanwhile, you call her mother and elder brother (father figure) regularly without waiting for their calls.
In this case what would you do? Married women do you think she is right?

Oga your inlaws also call you. They return your calls - thats the difference between your wife and Mum. Your mum has NEVER returned ur wife's call......eventually you ll get tired of calling people who dont call u.
It doesnt matter u havent sent money to ur mum because when you were sending money, ur mum still didnt call her so it makes no difference

yemisolar:
The first question to ask is, is there an active friction/quarrel between them? If there is, you should make active move to placate the two of them. If not then your wife is in the wrong.

Think of it this way, if your mother didn't raise you and give you education you wouldn't be there for her to marry. After all your mother's investment, she came and 'took' you. The least she could do is at least to go the extra mile is communicating with her. It doesn't have to be a long conversation. Just general greeting is okay.

Also, how would you feel if (God forbid) your mother dies suddenly and you know she has not spoken with your feet in 4 months? How would you feel if tables were turned and your (wife's) son in-law does the same?

Don't get me wrong, I am not saying your child Should be subservient to your mother. Relationship cannot be forced but courtesy demands that she doesn't wait for your mother to call before contacting her.

.
Oga his mum isnt more special than his wife's mum. Her mother also suffered to raise her to become somebody. I am sure that even in marriage, her mum is still supportive of her

otipoju:
Makes me remember my Father In Law...

We see in Church every Sunday.
Yet he will still be complaining to everyone that i dont call him during the week.

I had to ask him one day." Are you a girl "

Meanwhile nobody from my side dey disturb him daughter oooo.

loool
petty old women are common

but
petty old men? good lord , I can't stand them

How is their relationship? How does your mum treat your wife when she comes around? That could be the answer to the issue.

Besides women are more emotional and may not be able to pretend. If there is some kind of friction between them, she won't pretend and call for calling sake.

Just try to find out from both of them if there is any problem.

What goes around comes around.

The wife will be a mother-in-law someday. She should pray she doesn't wait till then to get to find out the kind of pains her husband's mother is going through over her actions.

A time might also come when she might need her mother-in-law's favor or help. I wonder the kind of mouth she will use in asking for it when the time comes.

Yes, old people can be stubborn and naughty at times. We just have to keep giving them respect because we don't know what it's like being old. When we become old, that's when we will realize that most of what we castigate them for are actually associated with old age. We'll even find ourselves doing the same.

Talk some sense into your wife and let her know that that's the only mother you have. If you don't give your mother peace of mind, it will affect you physically and spiritually.

And why is your wife acting like she wasn't raised by a mother? I guess she has unforgiving spirit. She's keeping malice for a "wrong" your mother must have done. She forgets that what goes around comes around.

Do you call her own mother regularly? Is she aware that you do? Then why isn't she considering your own mother worth calling?

keepingmum:


Oga your inlaws also call you. They return your calls - thats the difference between your wife and Mum. Your mum has NEVER returned ur wife's call......eventually you ll get tired of calling people who dont call u.
It doesnt matter u havent sent money to ur mum because when you were sending money, ur mum still didnt call her so it makes no difference

Oga don't say what u don't know, neither of her siblings call me and I don't care...even the elder brother don't call rather I do the calling once in a while. So ask question before u conclude. Thanks

IamEmem:


Oga don't say what u don't know, neither of her siblings call me and I don't care...even the elder brother don't call rather I do the calling once in a while. So ask question before u conclude. Thanks

@OP:

Does your wife call people on a regular? Does she have the habit of randomly calling people or just she only communicate when there is an issue to address?

If you're so concerned about this issue, why not always call your mother when your wife is around, so she can talk to her on your phone?

Stubborn people are very difficult to live with. Seriously, if your wife still refuses to call your mother despite calling her attention to the issue, then get ready for more troubles.

People who are stubborn are not flexible, they never compromise and nothing (not even the scam you people call love) can change their decision.

1 minute call (cost less than N20) would seem like N1 billion to a stubborn person.

lilmax:
family self.....tell your wife to call, apologize or you divorce her, simple

divorce comes so easy to the mouth



















your wife comes first



send stuff to your mum and tell her your wife bought it for her. do the same with your wife

if that doesn't work, this can only work if you call the shots, send your wife to spend a day with your mum and before then complain about not having enough money to provide food for that month or next then tell your mum to give your wife foodstuffs (send your mother money o) if your wife truly loves your well being she would be so happy that your mum helped you guys in time of need.


different things work for different families not all families work the same way

jeff1607:



divorce comes so easy to the mouth



















your wife comes first



send stuff to your mum and tell her your wife bought it for her. do the same with your wife

if that doesn't work, this can only work if you call the shots, send your wife to spend a day with your mum and before then complain about not having enough money to provide food for that month or next then tell your mum to give your wife foodstuffs (send your mother money o) if your wife truly loves your well being she would be so happy that your mum helped you guys in time of need.


different things work for different families not all families work the same way

This is falsehood and not a manly way of doing things.

If your wife can't get along with your mum, which she has to initiate because your mum is older than her, then it means she will soon start having problems with you. She probably doesn't regard your mum. She's acting like she just came to pick a husband and not her being married into your family. If she is married into the man's family, then the man's mother automatically becomes her mother. The only time she can chose not to respect her new mother is if she never respects her biological mother.