New Year Quiver

'Days are running by.'

And with each passing evening, I began to kiss 2018 farewell. What a wasted year!

'Glory to God,' Not because I deemed it necessary. Maybe to please Tonia (our next door neighbor) who admonished me to be grateful to God always.

My Green Diary laid on the table, begging for its owner's touch. I sat on the chair attached to the my reading table to begin my daily ecounter with my diary. I made the curtains part a little to permit the light from the moon shine on my diary (my love for moonlight is second to none).

An evening like this never go down well without the 'sweet' savouring taste of Black Bullet energy drink caressing my throat. With a flash, I had removed a can of my 'diet' from where I stored them. The first gulp of drink made me exhale loudly and immediately set my mind in a good working condition.

I started flipping through my three-year old diary. Too many events had taken place in my life. A scribble done with red ink made me stop. Oh! It was my new year resolutions for the year 2018. It reads:

"28/12/2017 - My new year resolutions:
No more alcohol.
No more sports betting."

Reading this made me grin (for my stupidity actually).

What was I thinking then? An admission seeker like me who had nothing doing writing this kind of New Year resolutions?
Who is deceiving who?

Mtcheew! With a reflex, my throat was blessed with another gulp of my Black Bullet.

I could remember how I so much wished to start the year 2018 anew, with good habits. I remembered how I envisioned myself living an alcohol-free life. I couldn't wait to stop staking my precious money on some useless football bet.

But how come? Didn't I resolve on my heart to stop? Didn't I pray to God? Didn't I spend the cross-over night in Church? Didn't God hear my prayers?

Seven weeks into 2018 saw me breaking all of my resolutions. Who does that!?

It wasn't my fault though. Yeah. PSG ought to have won thier match against Real Madrid. I had staked that game with #500 hoping for a large turn-over if my ticket 'entered'. Yeah, it's not still my fault. I was broke ( and definitely broken afterwards).

As fate would have it, Real Madrid took the glory home. My money was gone! I was literally finished. Hmmmmmn. I had to console myself. Just as you may guess, alcohol became the nearest option. De Rock was a good pick (*winks*). I felt light again.

That was how minutes of boredom brought me back to square one. After that day, I had a big relapse. I had gone back to my vomit. I no longer had the courage to start anew.

Afterall, the new year resolutions have been broken. I will wait till the upper year.

Sports betting became the order of the day. These people can't be 'eating' me like this. No way! And whenever I lost a bet, I used alcohol to 'cool temper".

Days rolled into weeks, weeks into months and now I'm about leaving 2018 behind. No change still.

But come to think of it. Do I really need to wait for another year to start afresh?

Hell no!

I'm just deceiving myself. Everyday is a 'New Year'. Nothing so special about it. If I can resolve to stop a habit today, why can't I do same tommorow? Despite the season of the year.

I'm not doing the New Year stuff anymore.
Maybe I can call it New Life resolutions. I will start today. Even if I relapse tommorow, I will try again the upper day. Afterall, success comes from our inability to rise again after we have fallen.

Hmmn.

What about my drinking habit? Maybe I will ask Mum to employ me in her Super-market - let me know if I will have the guts to drink in her presence.

No more stopping over at the bet shop. My time at the Super-market won't permit it.

" I will learn to trust in God wholly. 2019 must see me quitting these habits and finally getting admitted into a higher institution to further my education."

My heart became light again. And with a large gulp, I emptied the can of drink.

"Mummy" I screamed with excitement in my voice as I zoomed off my room.
"I'm following you to the Supermarket tommorow."

"It's late, keep your jokes for another day." My Mum spewed nonchalantly.

I gave out a mild laugh.

Surely, success begins with a practical step!
© AnthCunny